Notes: Zoe's interaction with Salamander (which the Doctor refers to as the incident with the extraterrestrial colony) happened in a fic I wrote called "Prisms of No Color."
There was a minute of stunned silence in the corridor.
"Aye," Jamie said. "Now I understand why ye di'n call the Doctor aboot this; ye di'n want him t' be here if he could help it because ye di'n want whoever was behind this to get their hands on him."
"Exactly," the Brigadier said. "And the last thing I wanted was for the Doctor to get any ideas of giving himself up—something which he has a history of doing."
"Well, now that you mention it…" the Doctor began.
"Absolutely not!" the Brigadier insisted. "This isn't a situation that calls for it, and even if it did, I wouldn't stand for it!"
"Aye, neither would I!" Jamie said, fiercely.
"I was going to suggest something else, but, anyway…" the Doctor sighed. "Very well, then, Brigadier; you say you've got the situation under control. Just what exactly are you doing to deal with it?"
"As I said, we're attempting to trace the messages as they come in."
"But you said that you weren't able to," Victoria pointed out. "If it's not working, then shouldn't you try something else?"
"It's only a matter of time until we succeed. Our equipment is state of the art…" the Brigadier began, but trailed off as Zoe tutted quietly. "I don't suppose you have any ideas, Miss Heriot?"
"Well, since I'm here, I was wondering if you'd like me to attempt tracing the message when it comes in," she said. "Your equipment may be fair for its day, but I have the knowledge of advanced programming techniques that might help me exploit some things that your technicians couldn't even dream of."
The Brigadier pondered over this.
"Also, do keep in mind that my knowledge base has increased since the last time we met," Zoe added.
"Very well, Miss Heriot; I shall let you work your magic," he conceded. "This way, please…"
He led the way to the central computer room; there was already someone at the computer console, who saluted the Brigadier as he arrived.
"Anything yet?" the Brigadier inquired.
"Nothing, Sir," the technician replied. "It'll be almost time for the rain to stop and the message to come in."
"Good. Miss Heriot will be taking over to attempt to trace the message."
The technician cast a wary look at Zoe as she stepped forward.
"Sir…?"
"Would you mind carrying on your conversation with the Brigadier away from the console so that I may work?" Zoe asked, feigning politeness. She gave a forced, polite smile as the technician stepped away. "Thank you."
The Doctor merely chuckled to himself as Jamie just shook his head. Victoria, on the other hand, was looking at Zoe in admiration.
"I wish I carried myself half as confidently as she does," she whispered to Jamie.
"Confident? Och, when she gets going, she can be a right know-it-all," the piper muttered back.
"Well, then, I'm glad she traveled with you after I left," Victoria retorted. "You needed to be around someone like her. And it sounds as though you still do."
"Och, sometimes, ye lassies can really—"
"Jamie, I suggest you put the brakes on that train of thought this instant," the Doctor chided. "Or else you'll find yourself at the receiving end of a tongue-lashing that I will not rescue you from."
Jamie got the message and kept quiet; the Brigadier politely ignored this all-too-audible argument and focused on Zoe's work at the computer.
"Anything?" he asked.
"Nothing new has come in yet," Zoe informed him. "But I'm going over the old messages. Whoever it is certainly wasted no time in making his demands clear. He's been demanding a million pounds and the Doctor's surrender since the first message, or else he'll continue with these flash storms."
"Well, it's clearly personal," the Doctor sighed. "Unfortunately, that doesn't narrow it down at all; there's a rather long list of people, aliens, and organizations that I've managed to anger."
"Aye, ye can say that again…" Jamie snarked.
The computer started beeping.
"Incoming message," Zoe announced. "And, thankfully, I'm ready to trace it…"
Within a minute, it was all over, and a stunned expression crossed the astrophysicist's face.
"…But that's impossible!" she exclaimed.
"Zoe, what is it?" the Doctor asked, as they rushed to her side.
"The trace didn't work?" the Brigadier asked.
"Oh, it worked," Zoe assured him. "But the results are impossible."
"Perhaps ye made a mistake?" Jamie mused, prompting Victoria to elbow him in the ribs.
"You don't have to sound so smug about it," she scolded.
"I didn't make a mistake," Zoe insisted. "I'm just trying to come up with an explanation for why the sending terminal is an iPad!"
Everyone in the room looked puzzled, except for the Doctor.
"An iPad?" he repeated. "Zoe, are you quite certain?"
"Yes!" she said. "Whoever has been sending these messages to the central computer here has been doing so with an iPad—despite the fact that iPads don't even exist in this time! I checked it, and I attempted to break into the sending terminal. The data that I saw was consistent with an iPad—app data, photographs, videos, and everything else you'd expect to find on an iPad!"
"Could you possibly translate this into terms that the rest of us can follow?" the Brigadier asked.
"Oh, yes, of course," the Doctor said, turning to them. "Well, it seems as though this mysterious weather controller is sending messages from a device that exists in the future. Do all the messages have the same source, Zoe?"
"I believe so," she said.
"Do you honestly believe that to be true, Doctor?" the Brigadier asked.
"Well, it was Sherlock Holmes who said, 'Once you have eliminated the impossible, whatever remains, however improbable, must be the truth.' And so, this must be the truth," the Doctor finished.
"Then there is a way for someone t' be sending all these messages from the future?" Jamie asked.
"Either from the future, or, more likely, from here, using a data cloud in conjunction with the time vortex," the Doctor said. "Zoe, was there anything in that iPad data that could give us a clue as to who is sending the messages?"
"I don't know," she said. "It seems to be mostly weather-predicting apps, some encrypted data, and…" She blinked in surprised. "…Apps in Spanish."
"…Of course," the Doctor said, shaking his head. "I should have realized sooner. Who else could be controlling the weather and have a vendetta against me?"
"Salamander!?" Jamie, Zoe, and Victoria all exclaimed at once.
The Brigadier still looked puzzled, and Victoria now looked to Zoe.
"Hold on; how did you know about Salamander?" she asked.
"I had the great misfortune of meeting him when he tumbled out of the time vortex and stirred up trouble on an extraterrestrial colony," Zoe explained.
"Aye; he nearly killed all of us!" Jamie exclaimed.
"It's uncanny, how much he resembles the Doctor," Zoe added.
"Isn't it!?" Victoria exclaimed. "Jamie and I couldn't even tell them apart—it nearly led to disaster!"
"Oh, I know," Zoe said, nodding emphatically. "I made that mistake, too; if I hadn't realized at the last second that his body temperature was human instead of Gallifreyan—"
"As much as I'd hate to interrupt your reminiscing," the Brigadier said. "You all seem to have the advantage over me. Who, exactly, is Salamander?"
"He's a genius who, through some bizarre coincidences, looks exactly like me," the Doctor explained. "There's no use asking me how; I don't understand it myself. Confidentially speaking, I have trouble keeping track of faces."
"Aye, ye certainly do!" Jamie insisted. "Even my face—!"
"Now is not the time to bring that up, Jamie," the Doctor said, flatly, before turning back to the Brigadier. "Salamander had, amazingly, found out how to harness the forces of nature, but he used this knowledge for his own selfish purposes."
"Naturally, you didn't stand for that, and you threw a spanner into the works?" the Brigadier finished.
"Yes, quite," the Doctor admitted, with a guilty grin. "After I impersonated him, he attempted to impersonate me and lie his way into the TARDIS."
"Jamie let him in," Victoria added, prompting Jamie to let out an indignant squawk.
"I di'n see ye telling me that it wasnae him—ye thought it was him, just as I did! And e'en Zoe said that she was fooled, too!"
"Anyway, Salamander attempted to start the TARDIS, but he left the doors open," the Doctor said, now talking over Jamie and the girls as they argued. "And, as a result of that, he got pulled into the time vortex. He ended up on an extraterrestrial colony where he once again proceeded to use his knowledge for personal gain—prompting me to throw another spanner in the works."
"I see," the Brigadier said. "Well, then it's safe to assume that he's got a rather painful fate in store for you."
"Oh, let him try," the Doctor said, waving a hand in dismissal.
"Aye, let him try!" Jamie echoed, as his eyes flashed in determination. "If he so much as lays a hand on the Doctor, I'll—!"
A particularly loud rumble of thunder cut him off, prompting Zoe to look back at the computer screen in confusion.
"Well, that's odd…" she muttered. "By the tone of this latest message Salamander sent, it was meant to be sent after this particular flash storm had stopped, and yet, the storm is still going on."
"What do you mean?" the Doctor asked.
"Well, look. 'I have given you yet another little taste of what you will receive if you do not surrender the Doctor and the million pounds. You shall receive another taste this time tomorrow.' But it's still raining."
"Perhaps a wee glitch in the system?" Jamie asked, pleased that he remembered the correct terminology.
"Perhaps…"
If Zoe had been thinking of another possibility, they would never know; someone now dashed into the central computer room, soaking wet and a look of panic on his face.
"What is it, Yates?" the Brigadier inquired, as he returned the captain's salute.
"The storm outside, Sir; it's spreading!"
"Spreading?"
"Yes, Sir; up until a minute ago, the storm was staying within the boundaries of all the other ones this fellow sent," Yates explained, breathlessly. "About a minute ago, it started spreading from all directions at incredible speeds; the storm spread past the entire visible horizon within twenty seconds!"
"Well, that settles it," the Doctor sighed. "I must meet with Salamander and convince him to stop this madness."
Jamie and the girls immediately protested at the top of their voices until the Brigadier called for quiet.
"Doctor, I'm afraid I have to agree with them," the Brigadier insisted. "I cannot allow you to surrender yourself."
"Who said anything about surrendering?" the Doctor asked. "Salamander doesn't have a security force or a mob at his disposal this time."
"Are you suggesting that you're going confront him one-on-one!?" the Brigadier exclaimed.
"Oh, it won't be one-on-one," the Doctor assured.
"Aye, I'll say it won' be; I'll be right there by the Doctor's side!" the piper vowed.
"I'm sure you will," the Doctor said, with a smile. "But I wasn't referring to you, either, Jamie. I mean that Salamander won't be working alone, either. He may not have a mob or and army, but he is most definitely not alone."
"How can you be certain?" Victoria asked.
"Even with all of his knowledge, there is no possible way that Salamander could harness a data cloud in conjunction with the time vortex on his own," the Doctor stated. "Human intelligence has its limits."
"So someone is aiding him," Zoe finished. "And allowing him to use this method."
"Exactly," the Doctor said, his face growing grim. "This someone also apparently told him that I—or, rather, Old Fancypants—would be here at UNIT. That means that this someone knows information regarding my personal timestream."
Jamie froze; he knew all too well what the consequences of someone meddling in the Doctor's timestream were.
"I must find out who it is who is aiding Salamander," the Doctor insisted. "And I must, somehow, stop them both."
