Sam had checked in and soon found herself sitting on a trolley in cubicles as Ethan checked her over.
"So, no loss of consciousness?" Ethan asked as he shone his pen torch into her eyes. He noticed they were a beautiful shade, then his thoughts went to Alicia, as they often did. She had pretty eyes too he thought before he could stop himself, then he pushed that thought out of his head and tried to concentrate on the patient in front of him.
"No."
"And no headache? Blurred vision?"
"No. Well, maybe a little bit of a headache, but I'm probably a bit dehydrated and having a come-down from the adrenaline."
"Yes, quite." Ethan agreed, looking at her again. "Well, we can give you some paracetamol, then get you down to x-ray."
"Oh, I'm sure there's no need honestly, just a couple of steri-strips and I'll get out of your way. You're so busy, you don't need me cluttering up the place."
"No, no. We need to make sure you're ok. You helped out in the field, it's the least we can do to make sure you're ok. Besides, if I miss something I might lose my reputation as the most careful doctor in the ED." He smiled and Sam chuckled.
"Well, I'd hate to ruin your reputation." She smiled at him and he smiled back, holding her gaze for a moment longer than was entirely comfortable.
"Um, well." He cleared his throat. "If you just follow the signs and make your way to x-ray, I'll go and request them on the system."
"Thanks." Sam said softly, smiling. She slid off the bed and headed back out to the main body of the department. Ethan disappeared to order the X-rays and Sam stood looking to work out where to go.
"Are you lost?" Cal asked as he had seen his patient off safely to surgery.
"Oh, um, I'm supposed to be going for an X-ray." Sam replied.
"Down that way." Cal pointed smiling as he slipped his phone out of his pocket.
"Thanks." Sam said as she started to walk off. Cal looked at his phone and slipped it back into his pocket when he realised there was nothing on it. Suddenly he looked up and saw Sam take a wobble and instinctively he reached out to catch her.
"Woah, are you ok?" He said clutching her steady.
"Yes, I just came over a little dizzy for a moment."
"Come on, let's sit you down again." Cal said. "Where were you?" Sam pointed in the direction of the cubical and Cal led her to the trolley and helped her onto it.
"Are you ok?" He said, flicking his pen torch in her eyes, satisfied that she seemed to be recovering.
"Yes, sorry, I just had a moment."
"Who's looking after you?" Cal asked, picking up the chart off the side of the trolley.
"Um, Dr Hardy." Sam said at the same time as Cal recognised his brothers handwriting on the chart. She saw a flash of reaction in his eyes. "Is that bad?" She asked, reading his reaction.
"No. Not at all, he's um, he's a very good doctor." Cal said, a slight hurt tone in his voice. "I just thought I should update him on your condition."
"No, really, I'm ok." Sam assured him and Cal looked slightly relieved.
"You're sure?" He asked.
"Yes, I'm fully recovered, see? I'll just make my way to x-ray." Sam said, hopping back down off the trolley. As they left the cubical Ethan reappeared.
"What are you doing with my patient?" Ethan said firmly.
"Relax Ethan, I was just helping her."
"I'm sure you were." Ethan spat out quietly, trying to ensure Sam didn't hear.
"What's that supposed to mean." Cal whispered back harshly.
"You know exactly." Ethan huffed.
"No I don't Ethan, I don't know what has gone on here at all. I don't know why you're so annoyed with me all the time, why you don't talk to me anymore unless you're picking a fight. If either of us has the right to be pissed off then it's me, after all you slept with my girlfriend!"
"I wha- I-I, well it's not like you didn't deserve it." Ethan recovered from the shock announcement with another cutting remark.
"I deserved it? Really Ethan? That's why you did it? Come on, you don't fool me, you never stopped liking her, did you?"
"It's more than that."
"Oh what, don't tell me, you love each other." Cal spat back.
"No, she made it clear who she wanted when she chose you. It's the same as always, they always chose you."
"So that's it, you're jealous and you can't handle it so you're punishing me." Cal said, his voice raising in anger. Sam had slipped unnoticed out of the cubical and had pulled the curtain around to stop people staring, but she didn't feel she could intervene to stop this dispute. Instead she started to head to x-ray. Suddenly she heard the unmistakable sound of a punch being thrown and a grunt and saw Cal come flying out of the cubical clutching his face and looking angry. He turned and stalked off leaving Sam and the rest of the department staring as Ethan too stormed out and walked off. Charlie instinctively headed off after Cal whilst Lily went to catch Ethan.
…
"We should phone this through." Jez glanced over his shoulder looking worried as he jumped in the ambulance to drive back to the ED.
"Yeah, but I don't want to create panic before we arrive." Iain said whilst carefully monitoring Alicia. They had already intubated her, and had secured her with a pelvic binder, but Iain was convinced there was significant internal bleeding. Things were looking grim, and he was worried. "Do you think we should divert her to St James'?" Iain asked.
"What? No! She needs to be at Holby, if we alert them then maybe the major trauma unit on AAU can take her." Jez said.
"Maybe." Iain said, looking down at Alicia, not even convinced they would make it that far.
…
"Cal, what was that all about?" Charlie asked, as he sat him down in the staff room.
"I don't know Charlie." Cal sighed. "We've been through bad times before, many times, but it just feels like I've lost him for good this time. He can't even look at me without spilling out hatred."
"You need to talk, but you two have never been any good at that."
"I know." Cal said sadly, looking at the floor. "I miss him Charlie." He admitted, looking back up into the caring eyes of the older nurse, who Cal had seen as a father figure of late.
"So tell him." Charlie said, holding his gaze, giving him a supportive look.
"I don't even know how to."
"You just told me."
"Yes, but this is Ethan. Ethan is…well he's Ethan." Cal said and Charlie let out a breathy laugh.
"I know, he's your little brother, he needs you as much as you need him. You're both just too stubborn to admit you need each other, and not only that, you want each other."
"I know." Cal said, his voice barely above a whisper.
"Now, let me take a look at that nose." Charlie smiled.
…
"Ethan, Ethan!" Lily called as she tried to catch up with him as he walked outside. "Ethan wait." HE reluctantly stopped and turned to face his friend. "Ethan, what happened?"
"Nothing, it's fine." He said, anger still flowing through him.
"Ethan." Lily said softly. "This is me, you can trust me."
"I can't, I mean it doesn't matter." Ethan said, softening slightly at the sight of Lily's concerned look.
"Ethan, please? You're my friend. Let me help you."
"I don't need help, I'm dealing with it."
"Forgive me Ethan, but it doesn't look like you are." Lily said softly, but with an air of authority. Ethan looked up at her again and felt his resolve crumbling.
"I'm a terrible person aren't I?" He said suddenly.
"What? No! Ethan you're the nicest person I know. You never set out to hurt anyone."
"Well, I have this time. I've done something terrible and I can't forgive myself for it."
"Ethan, what is it?" Lily looked confused.
"I-I…it doesn't matter." Ethan shook his head.
"Ethan?" Lily raised an inquisitve eyebrow.
"I slept with someone I shouldn't have…I…I fell for someone I shouldn't have." Ethan admitted quietly. Lily looked at him.
"Alicia." She whispered softly, and Ethan nodded in confirmation, unable to meet her eye.
"I know, it's terrible. I've slated Cal so many times and it turns out I'm just the same."
"You're not the only one to blame thought Ethan." Lily pointed out.
"What do you mean?"
"Well, she is dating your brother and yet she still leads you on enough to end up in bed with you."
"No, she didn't lead me on – I just-"
"Ethan, it takes two." Lily said, cutting him off before he could shoulder the entire blame. "Frankly, she is in a worse position, she is the one in the relationship."
"But Cal, he didn't always treat her right, they both played a lot of games to start with. I don't think he knew what he wanted until we went away at Christmas."
"Even so."
"And he knows. I didn't know he knew, but he blurted it out just now, and I…I punched him."
"I know, I saw." Lily admitted.
"Why Lily?"
"Well, I was standing nearby."
"No, I mean, why me? Why do things never go right for me?"
"You just haven't found the right situation yet. But one day-"
"No, it can't be one day Lily. I don't have the time for one day. My day needs to be soon, or there won't be one." Ethan said, admitting in part out loud what he had not really been able to face.
"Ethan." Lily looked sadly at him. "Don't rush it because of that. When you meet the right person, it won't matter. Any love is worthwhile, whether it lasts 2 years, 20 years or a lifetime. It's still love."
"But what kind of love will it be with me? Wedding vows that say 'in sickness and in death' or 'I promise to look after you when you become a shell of yourself and are unable to do anything for yourself anymore'? What kind of life is that?" He said, wiping away a stray tear that had fallen onto his cheek.
"Ethan, please?"
"No, Lily. I can't. I just-I need to be alone." Ethan said getting up off the bench and walking back towards the ED doors where an ambulance was pulling up fast. Ethan decided he could take on this case, get his mind off what had happened. Jez jumped quickly out of the ambulance and shouted to him.
"Ethan, quick! It's Alicia!" He shouted. Ethan's head shot up and Lily, who was now walking back inside also heard and headed towards them. Suddenly Elle and Connie appeared at the doorway and Cal came rushing through, pushing to the front, looking terrified and pale. Everyone looked grimly towards the back of the ambulance as Jez opened the door and helped Iain out with the trolley. It was as if time stood still, then only proceeded in slow motion as they watched the girl that was normally so bubbly and full of life, lying motionless, intubated on an ambulance trolley being wheeled into their ED.
