It was Sunday morning, the sun was bathing her in its light through the dining room window. God! How she hated weekends now! There was too much time to think during weekends, in particular when Trixie was at her father's like today. At least she had Maze to keep her mind occupied. Maze was always full of surprises. Their friendship had grew during the last three months, a side effect of the pain they were both in following Lucifer's departure. They had supported each other through the process of accepting he was gone and out of their lives. Well, Maze still wanted to kill him though. But lately, she seemed to keep her mind occupied with other things, mainly her body hunting cases. They had been looking everywhere for Lucifer, using police information as well as Maze's talent at finding people. But in vain. Lucifer didn't want to be found. Even Amenadiel didn't have a clue of his whereabouts. She took another sip of coffee, going through the newspaper, seated at the table. She didn't really read it, she was just scanning it, slowly turning the pages, pursuing her reverie. Concentration was difficult lately.
For the thousandth time, she wondered what she had done to make him leave her. Or did she just imagine it all? No! She dismissed it automatically. It was impossible! It had been real. The bond they had forged in the last year, the love she saw in his eyes each time they were alone and having what he called «a moment». And that kiss… Never in her life had she felt so complete and loved than when he had kissed her back. After that, he had finally agreed, with a little work on her part, that what they had was real. Or did he? Maybe he just acknowledged that what she felt for him was real. That could have been what made him run, the understanding that she had fallen in love with him, when his feelings were different. She had opened up to him entirely at the end, giving him her heart, trusting him completely even with her life. He had broken her heart but he had literally saved her life. How he had done that was still a complete mystery. Dan couldn't find any information to enlighten her about Lucifer's source of information for the cure's recipe. It seemed impossible. But that was Lucifer, right? Always doing the impossible.
She relived it all over and over again, trying to understand why he left, but never finding a real answer. He was just an idiotic, emotionally handicapped son of a bitch! An immature coward, unable to face his emotions. That was the best explanation she could find. Her heart ached, her insides contorted, and her breath came short. Again. Her eyes were filling with tears. She was again on the verge of crying. She thought she would go crazy.
Please, somebody, make it stop!
She took a couple of deep breaths and steadied herself. There, that was better. She thought she was really doing better though. Only a couple weeks ago, she would not have been able to stop the tears. She was definitely getting better at controlling her emotions. Maze said she even looked more alive too, whatever that meant. Did she feel more alive? Not really. It was like walking through a thick layer of smoke that never dissipated. Let's just say that she got used to living with the pain. She didn't think she could ever be her old self again. But she had to try, for Trixie's sake, and hers.
There she was again, thinking about him, about them. There was no them, and never really had been. Right? She really had to think about something else, change her mind.
"What are we doing today?" she asked.
"Humm! Don't know, maybe we could go at the shooting range." answered Maze.
She was eating her usual cereals with vodka, sitting on the sofa in front of the TV. How she could eat that each morning eluded Chloe. But then, a lot of things about that woman eluded her. Maze had taken a taste for shooting with guns. Chloe had to admit that it was a perfect activity for both of them, since it allowed them to empty their minds of any thoughts. Very useful in their circumstances.
"Very good idea! I'm in a mood to kill someone." Answered Chloe.
She was still scanning the newspaper when she stopped short. Her breathing caught and she thought her heart was about to stop. He was right there for everyone to find! She was looking at Lucifer's picture, bemused. She couldn't think, her world was spinning. What….? Then she had a moment of panic. Maybe he had had an accident and that's why he was in the newspaper. Terrified, she looked down at the article, and read: «Lucifer Morningstar, playboy millionaire from L.A., has tied the knot yesterday, in a little chapel of Las Vegas, with a young striper nearly half his age…»
A strange sound escaped her throat. Maze jumped off the sofa immediately at the sound, understanding quickly that something was amiss.
"Are you ok? What's happened?" Maze was at a loss.
Chloe couldn't talk. She couldn't either turn her gaze from that picture. She'd just realised that Lucifer wasn't alone on it. He was standing beside a young and beautiful woman, hand in hand, both with a wonderful smile on their faces. No! That couldn't be! No! Her world was spinning faster and faster and then, she fainted…
