Some of you are probably confused, but I promise, things will make sense VERY soon!
P.S. Thank you for the reviews, without them, I wouldn't have direction.
Hearing the gentle sounds of someone humming, Nick woke up, spread-eagled on his girlfriend's couch. Blinking his eyes a few times to adjust them to the light, he picked up his hand to wipe off the drool that had accumulated on his bottom lip. Groaning slightly, he then picked himself up, and headed towards the humming, which happened to be accompanied with the smells of eggs and bacon.
"Honey! You're awake! You slept real good last night then?" Rachel giggled.
"Uhh, not really," Nick answered awkwardly. "You fell asleep a lot earlier than I did. You must have been pretty tired. As soon as that movie ended, you were dreaming. I couldn't get to sleep though, unfortunately."
"Oh, why's that?"
"I had a lot on my mind. I can never sleep without a clear train of thought. Right now everything in my brain is a little jumbled up." He replied trying to open up his girlfriend, to see if this would make things easier on himself. His guiltiness was one of the main reasons why it was painful to be in that room at that moment.
"Can I help in any way?" Rachel said, with a hint of seductiveness filling her voice.
"Um, I'm not sure that's a good idea right now baby. I'm a little sleepy still, and my brain is buzzing."
"Right," she answered, a little upset and feeling rejected. "Well, come eat some breakfast that I made you, and we can decide what we're going to do today."
"Did I not tell you? I have to head to the studio today. Joe and Kevin are bugging me to get this song finished- I keep messing up this one line. I feel like I can't get the right emotion you know?"
Honestly, Nick was pleased that he was able to look past the thoughts he was having the night before, so that he could have a normal conversation with his girlfriend.
"Oh, I totally understand," she added with a smile.
'And there's that smile that I fell for,' Nick thought.
"I hope eggs, bacon and pancakes are ok?"
"Yeah, baby, that's great," Nick replied, cheering up slightly as he took his seat at the table.
Before he could do anything else, she reached over for the syrup and made the move to pour it over his pancakes for him.
"Rachel! I'm diabetic, if you didn't remember?"
"Oh my gosh! I'm so sorry Nick. That was a total accident. I wasn't even thinking. It was lucky that you stopped me though right?" She claimed, whilst adding a painful giggle.
'Miley would never have made that mistake,' Nick thought, but then stopped himself. 'Where the hell did that come from?' He asked himself.
However all he did was answer her quietly, "Yeah, lucky."
"So, are you excited for your birthday party next week?" Rachel asked, trying to change the subject to ease some of the tension and embarrassment that she was feeling.
"I guess so. I doubt there will be any real change in the way I feel just turning a year older, but 19 was always my lucky number."
"Yeah, I remember you telling me that a few months ago. I think your family has really gone to lengths for this one Nick. I heard your parents talking about what they were planning to do, and it sounds awesome. I can't wait to see-" But Rachel quickly closed her mouth, scared of what she was about to say.
"Can't wait to see what?"
"Oh, you know. The whole of your family in one room. I have only met your parents and brothers, so I guess this will be the perfect time for me to meet everyone else right?"
"Right." Nick felt his stomach clench as those words left Rachel's mouth. And that was when he realised that she was a lot more dedicated to the relationship than he was. But he also realised at the same time that breaking someone else's heart, was not a road he wanted to go down. He had been at the receiving end of that, and came out worse than he thought he would.
So he just looked up and caught Rachel's eye and smiled softly at her. He then reminded himself that he had chosen her for many reasons, and he listed those reasons to himself at that very moment, to stop himself from saying something that he knew he would regret later on.
For the rest of breakfast, the two sat in silence and just listened to the radio that was playing in the background.
Picking up his napkin to wipe his lips, he moved his plate to the sink and rinsed it quickly.
"I better get going now, you know what Joe and Kevin are like when I don't get to the studio on time."
"Sure, will I see you tonight?"
"I'll give you a call when I leave the studio, but if it's too late, I'll just drop you a text if that's ok? I don't want to wake you."
"Sure, thanks for being considerate." Rachel stood up and walked towards her boyfriend wrapping her arms around his neck.
"And Nick? I'm sorry again for forgetting about the diabetes. It literally just slipped my mind. I would never want to put you in danger, you know that right?"
"Of course I know that Rach. Just think about it next time 'kay?"
"Okay."
"Now come here and give me a kiss before I leave," Nick replied, shocking himself and Rachel at his forwardness. After saying their goodbyes, Nick couldn't help but be confused at his new bipolar state of mind. He never knew whether the next thought that would come into his head would be happy, resentful or upset. He was just plain confused.
He arrived at the studio a little over a half hour later, because he had taken his time whilst driving to once again clear his head. He knew that he needed to record this
song today or his brothers were not going to be happy, and at that time, with all of the thoughts running through his head, he knew he would not be able to concentrate.
"Hey Number 3!"
"Number 3? Really Joe? Is that the newest one of your nicknames you have for me?"
"Well, it makes sense doesn't it?"
"I guess so, but just don't call me it again!" Nick chuckled, glad that Joe had already brightened his mood, and reduced some of the strange feelings that Nick was thinking about.
"Hey Nick, you ready to nail this one today?" Kevin asked.
"Hopefully, but before we start can I talk to you guys about something?"
"Sure, go ahead," they both said in unison.
"Wow, that's odd," Nick started with a shrug of his shoulders. "Well, last night it was mine and Rachel's anniversary right?"
"Oh yeah! How did it go?"
"Do you want me to finish the story Joe? Or would you like to take a guess and try and finish it for me?"
"I guess I could give it a go if you wante-"
"Joe! Shut up," Kevin said, "Carry on Nick. I'm listening, even if this one has his head somewhere else."
"So I took her out, and we had dinner and everything- and I even took her on that balloon ride. So romantic, well at least that's what I thought. Anyway, she seemed to love it, and was praising me the whole way home, except the whole time I was thinking of ways that I would change her, and how I feel that I'm not ready to be tied down to one person."
"Go on."
"When she fell asleep, I found myself looking at her and feeling as if I was only with her for the way she looks. I never wanted to be that kind of shallow guy, but I can't help it. All the other small things that made me fall in love with her in the first place, are still there, except now I don't notice them when she walks in a room. All I notice is how her hair is nice, or how she has a good figure. But then, in the next moment, she looks at me, and we share the connection I felt a year ago, and I find myself back in the situation where I wouldn't want to give her away for the world. What's wrong with me?"
"I don't think there's anything wrong with you Nick. It just sounds like you're falling out of love with her, and maybe that's a sign that you need to move on with your life." Kevin said after a short pause.
"Yeah, Kev's right Nick. If you are feeling this way at all, I don't think it's very fair that you pull her along for the ride anymore. She needs to know what you feel and where you stand."
"You want to know the weirdest thing though?" Nick continued. "This morning she made me breakfast-"
"Doesn't sound weird to me," Joe interrupted.
"Joe! I wasn't finished," Nick sighed. "She made me breakfast, but when she finished piling stuff onto my plate, she reached over and was about to put syrup all over my pancakes."
"Uhhhh!" Kevin gasped dramatically. "What a horrible thing for your girlfriend to do! How dare she think that it's okay to put syrup on the one and only Nicholas' pancakes?"
"Once again I wasn't finished. And two things- she didn't think about me or my health before she put the syrup on. It was like she completely forgot about my diabetes. I mean, sure I can have sugar, but she was literally about to drown the poor things in that stuff. And so I stopped her before she could do any damage, but do you want to know the weirdest part?"
"As always." Joe replied.
"When she put the jug back down, I couldn't stop myself from thinking 'oh, Miley would never do that'."
And as those sentences left Nick's mouth, the room fell into silence.
"You thought about Miley?" Joe asked.
"You thought about Miley when your girlfriend was making your breakfast? You thought about Miley, your best friend Miley, when your girlfriend did something wrong?" Kevin continued.
"Dude, that's messed up," Joe finished.
"You think I don't know that? Nick exclaimed. "It's not like I want to think about her in that way anymore. I mean, it's been over a year and a half now. She's gone, and then suddenly out of the blue, I'm there thinking of how she would never put my health in danger. She would be the one making sure I went nowhere near those pancakes."
Kevin and Joe looked and each other, and panicked. They did not need Nick going down this road again.
"Nick-o, I definitely think you're talking this too seriously. You and Rachel are so good together, and most of the time you are really happy together as well. Don't throw it away on something you're not even sure about. It's just something that comes into your head every once in a while. Believe me, I was there too before I proposed to Dani."
"Propose?! Who said anything about a proposal?! I'm 19! Well almost."
"Nick, calm down," Joe urged. "Kevin didn't mean that. What we're trying to say is everyone goes through stuff like this. Rachel probably even thought about it sometime too. Your not the only one that has these feelings, so don't get yourself down."
"If you say so."
"Well, at least wait until after your party before you do anything. Rach put a lot of effort in to getting everything sorted for you, so don't put her efforts to waste, okay?"
"Sure, I wasn't planning on doing anything too soon anyway."
"Plus, you two do look adooooorable together," Joe mocked.
"Don't make fun of it Joe. Just because you don't have this face, doesn't mean that you have to get all uptight."
"Right, if you say so Nick. Let's just get to recording this song now, yeah? You think you can cope 'Prez'?"
Nick simply rolled his eyes, smiled and walked into the recording both, happy that he had had that talk with his brothers.
Miley WILL be back next chapter- along with a bit of Niiiiiiley, and I've got the main story line set out so far, so expect updates a lot faster than last time!
Review? Please?
Xoxo Zoe
