Ai: Chapter 2 IS HERE! And will more people please review this?

Disclaimer: Did you just say that I own Katekyo Hitman Reborn? C'mere... Oh, I'm not going to TOUCH you... I'm just gonna give you a nice slap to the face.


Fran, the illusionist of the Varia, did not join said elite assassination squad by choice. If anything, he was forced to join or pay the price, AKA die. Not a very difficult decision, because if you wanted to commit suicide, you were given the other option of being killed as well. A part of Fran wanted to spit in their faces, swear at them rudely in all the languages he knew and emphasize once more that he did NOT want to join the Varia, but he most certainly didn't have a death wish and he also knew the meaning of 'value your life', so he agreed to join. But that didn't mean that he did it happily. Like I said, he only agreed because the only other option left to him was to die.

So, yes, a very reluctant Fran joined the Varia. He has to put up with a boss with the tendency to fly into explosive rages for silly reasons, anytime, anywhere. He has to put up with a Vice-Commander whose voice is loud enough to make your ears bleed. He has to put up with a blood-loving prince who loves to stab him in the back (literally) for no reason whatsoever at all, who also happens to be his sempai and the person he's usually sent on missions with. It was a good thing that he had a high pain tolerance. Sadly, these crazy things, which should have, rightfully, sent even the most tolerant man in the world bursting into tears and running away screaming for his mummy (especially if they occurred on a near-daily basis) were but merely the tip of the other things Fran has to put up with. He reckoned that at such a rate, he would die even before he reached the age of thirty. And he was currently in his twenties.

And another thing: he wasn't the most tolerant man in the world.

But despite everything, he was at least proud to say that THE Varia had wanted him. A lot. Hence the join or die offer. That really meant something, because that meant that he was strong enough for THE Varia to recognize his skills.

And perhaps not just recognize, because they wanted him so badly that they wouldn't take no for an answer. Even Trident Mosquito Shamal got away with a polite(?) no. But proud as he was over how much the Varia had wanted him, he wished they hadn't resorted to such a humiliating way of recruiting him.

…What's that? 'How did he join the Varia'?

He wasn't referring to the 'join or die' thing, he was referring to them kidnapping him in broad daylight and taking him back to the Varia Headquarters, THEN telling him to join or die.

They just didn't know when to give up. They asked politely the first few hundred times, and he declined politely the first few hundred times. (That is, if you can call stalking him all the way back home and breaking down his door, among other things, 'asking politely'.) But then they suddenly decided that if they were going to recruit him, they would do it with a bang.

Squalo and Belphegor were sent to do the dirty deed. The plan was simple. First, they stalked the target. In this case, Fran. Then, knock him out in one hit before he even knows what hits him. With him out for the count, even a baby can kidnap him. No, Arcobalenos are not counted.

It was so easy, it was almost laughable. Or was it? The Varia had scouted Fran for a reason, other than for his biting sarcasm. The stalking part went without any problems, surprisingly, because it turned out that even Squalo knew how to keep quiet when on a kidnapping mission. But as for the part where Fran was required to be rendered unconscious, he, naturally, put up a fight. A huge one. He refused to go with them and had apparently decided that he would go with honor if he was pushed into a corner. So fight he did.

Okay, so not really 'fight'. He was an illusionist, after all. So he conjured praise-worthy illusions. Even though they were part of the Varia, and were supposed to have 'Varia Quality', it took Squalo and Belphegor more than a little while to find Fran while still under his illusion and get the job done.

Squalo wanted to do it the conventional way, instead of the 'princely' way Belphegor had suggested (which included a lot of Fran's blood being shed unnecessarily just for the fun of it), so they tied him up, injected a drug into him to make him stay asleep for a longer period of time, then carried him back to their headquarters. Bel had the job of carrying him and Bel being Bel, was not the least but happy about it. As a result, he chose to vent his anger by putting several knives into his unconscious soon-to-be kouhai's back.

Fran eventually woke up when the drug wore off, sore and aching all over from remaining in the same position for too long, but his back hurt the most. When he leaned against the chair he was tied to, his back hurt even more, so he figured that his kidnappers had stuck something into his back (and he wasn't wrong, because Bel HAD and had been too lazy to remove his knives too).

His first thought was, "Will they stop chasing me only after I'm dead?" Then, "Ouch." In short, not a very happy Fran. Not happy at all, indeed. Just then, as if to mock him, his kidnappers showed up.

"Haha, you got caught by us, stupid boy. Ushishishishi~"

Or maybe it really was to mock him.

The thing Fran really wanted to do the most right then was to STRANGLE THAT FREAKING BLOND FAKE PRINCE but he knew that at that point of time, it would be impossible. Sadly. …Why? Because he was tied to a chair, remember? Therefore, he had to make do with kicking Belphegor in the shin as hard as he could. At least he could gain a little satisfaction from hearing him swear in pain.

"VOOOOOOOOOOOOIIIIIIII!!!!!!!" Squalo screamed, "What do you think you're doing, you stupid hostage?!!!"

Fran was sure that he had ruptured an eardrum from such a loud shout, but the fact that he could still hear the fake prince swearing loudly through his ringing ears meant that he had only just barely managed to retain his precious sense of hearing. Still, his ears would never be the same again. But there wasn't any time for that. He had to come up with a witty remark, and fast, because he was determined not to let them know how confused he was over being kidnapped and taken to the strange place he was in, wherever it was. "Wow, it speaks," he eventually said in a tone of mock surprise.

But this, unfortunately, only resulted in yet another angry VOOOOOIIIIII to his face. So much for a sense of humor, Fran thought.

Needless to say, Squalo was most displeased with Fran's attitude. He still couldn't understand why Xanxus had shoved Fran's profile onto Bel and him before barking at them to recruit the boy into the Varia as their new Mist member through whatever means necessary. Not that either of them had even done more than just glance through the five-inch thick volume, never mind read it. They would much rather have spent their time on better things… such as getting Fran to join them. Squalo did two things next. First, he fixed his sword onto his fake arm and pointed the silver blade at poor Fran. After that, he shouted all the facts previously mentioned in this paragraph (minus the 'Squalo did two things next' part onwards) at the now extremely confused boy.

Fran, unable to resist, was quick to point out to an enraged Superbi Squalo that despite attempting to recruit him for nearly a year and a half, both Varia members had yet to know his name. (He noticed that they didn't call him anything else other than 'boy', or 'brat', and he was very much correct.) Squalo banged his head against a nearby wall repeatedly in frustration while Bel had to resist the urge to do a facepalm (it would have been too un-prince-like). It just goes to show how much a lone boy can annoy two adults at the same time.

Now, Xanxus, not being deaf, had obviously heard the loud shouts (all from Squalo) from the basement where three of our beloved Varia members were and, unable to bear it any longer, had stomped down the stairs to the source of all the noise, blasted the door open (not that it had been locked, mind you) with his Flames of Rage and demanded to know 'what that infernal din' was all about. And caught sight of Fran, with at least six of Bel's knives in his back, tied to a chair. He decided to change his question to something else.

"Who is that brat?"

Squalo replied that 'it was the brat they were sent to recruit' and gained a Flame of Rage fireball in his direction.

"YOU IDIOTS!!!" Xanxus roared. "You didn't even read the book I passed to you, did you?!! You went to capture this brat just because you saw his photo in there, didn't you?!! You were supposed to recruit this piece of trash's MASTER!!!"

There was a pin-drop silence.

"So… can I go?" Fran asked hopefully.

"No, you trash," Xanxus snapped back. "You'll join us in the place of your master."

You can imagine how Fran felt when he heard that, but after being given the 'join or die' choice, he chose to join them anyway. He decided that he would give the other members of the Varia hell as payback for recruiting the wrong guy and in the hopes that they would grow so sick of him that they would let him out still alive and in one piece.

Unfortunately, he only succeeded in his first goal. …Not that he's dead, mind you, but let's face it: Fran IS of use to the Varia. They're not going to let him out just like that.


Author's Notes:

Some reviews would be appreciated, you know~ Ehh, now I've got no idea who to use for the next chapter (I only started this fic with ideas for Squalo and Fran)... Well, I accept contributions of ideas, so you can review and tell me your idea or you can just drop me a PM. (You'll be credited, of course.)Thanks~

PS: I know my english stinks, but... I hope you like it anyway. .____.;