Hello, all. Thank-you for the lovely reviews. Here's the second chapter. I hope you like it :)
Lunar Eclipse
Chapter Two
Very little could convince Sugawara that he wasn't tangled in a vicious nightmare right now, except for the obvious fact that he wasn't. What was he doing in a hospital? How could the chain of events of his life have led him to this moment, in a hospital cafeteria, hoping a friend, a friend who has lived a shorter lifetime than he has, didn't lose that life sometime in the next few hours? It was humbling and it was terrifying, thinking about the fact that he might actually outlive someone close to him while he was still in high school. His mind traveled back to the first time he saw the first years enter the gym. It was his gym, his home, and he was about to share it with these new players. It was his job - his, Daichi's, and Asahi's - to help these new players grow, and nobody could forget the potential they all saw in Tsukishima. While everyone obsessed over Kageyama and Hinata's quick, they knew the two blockheads weren't the only talented players on the court. Tsukishima was tall, taller than even Asahi. He had a great build for blocking, and the intelligence to back it up, if only he cared. Now he had finally begun to tap that potential... and something like this came crashing down around him.
"It's not fair." Sugawara whispered to himself. The sound of his own voice was harsh and unnatural. It sounded alien, and it made him uncomfortable.
Who would they use to replace the middle blocker position if Tsukishima died? Would the team ever be the same? Could any of them ever love volleyball again? Especially...especially Yamaguchi. Oh, god...Yamaguchi. He had been so wrapped up in his own problems, he had forgotten about Yamaguchi. The poor kid had no idea what had happened, and there was no way he could handle it in his present situation. His best friend might not even live to see daybreak and he was at home with his family, completely oblivious to the hell that Tsukishima was wrestling with at this very moment...Sugawara wished he could stop thinking about death.
He tried to think about his coffee instead. It wasn't the greatest coffee he'd ever had, but he was sitting in a hospital cafeteria at two in the morning. This was the best he was going to get. He swirled the caramel-colored liquid around in the flimsy cardboard cup. He watched the milky white spread through the darker brown, making tiny patterns in the cup. He tried to let the scent carry him away.
It wasn't bad coffee, really. He'd had worse. Besides, he needed the caffeine. If he was being honest with himself, though, he didn't think he could sleep right now, anyway, even without the caffeine. There was something about seeing a close friend nearly die right in front of you that really interrupts the sleep schedule. He chastised himself for being so morbid.
He remembered being groggy waking up that morning. This morning. It was only 18 hours ago, but it felt like weeks. He took a sip of his coffee and checked his phone. The coffee was just slightly, almost imperceptibly bitter, and even though it wasn't great coffee, it had been made exactly the way he liked it. Almost obsessively, he checked his phone again. No new messages from coach. It had been almost ten minutes. Trying to distract himself, he looked around the cafeteria. It was white. It was so white it almost looked mint green, like the white had gotten so bright that it had turned neon. It was disgusting, and it made him feel like throwing up. He closed his eyes, and tried to force back the grisly images of mere hours ago that flooded his mind. Images, snapshots captured in vivid color, bombarded him just behind his eyes. The deep red blood that stained his teammate's shirt and jeans, the same blood that stained his hands. For a moment, he could almost see it covering his hands, springing from a sort of fountain underneath his skin like a warped fountain of youth, distorted by nightmares. He opened his eyes.
There was no blood. There was a spot of coffee, though, right there on his right thumb where the cup had spilled over, just a little. He considered wiping it off, but didn't care enough to do so. Looking around some more, he could see the handful of other people milling silently around the cafeteria. Most of them seemed to be just as he was, exhausted past words, nursing mediocre cups of 2am hospital coffee just as he was. He wondered if any of them were in a better position than he was. He turned back around to see a sweet-faced middle aged woman standing in front of him, across the two-person table.
"Hello, young man. I noticed you were here alone. Kids your age don't usually hang out at hospitals alone in the middle of the night, so I thought you could use someone to talk to."
Sugawara smiled at her, though it felt like a grimace. She seemed kind, approaching him of her own volition. He wondered what was going on in her own life to cause her to want to reach out to him at his lowest point, when she was clearly here to support someone as well. He began to feel like he didn't deserve her kindness, but quickly chastised himself. None of this was his fault, he had to remember.
"Yes. Thank-you, ma'am." She sat down in the chair across from him.
"So," she began, "what do you need to get off your chest? Why are you here?"
Sugawara paused before he answered. Was he really about to spill his guts to a total stranger, a stranger who might even judge him for screwing up so badly? Maybe this woman showing up was some sort of divine providence. But then again...
"I...I'm sorry. I don't know if I can say just yet. Thinking about it is one thing, but giving it a voice makes it real. I don't think I can handle that. My...my teammate...my friend got shot. I can't say anything else."
Sugawara could feel himself shaking as he spoke. It was involuntary, and it was violent. He felt a harsh chill pass through his body and clutched his coffee cup tighter, draining the last vestiges of heat from the lukewarm cup. He clung desperately to the flimsy cardboard, even though he knew his skin was hot to the touch. He suddenly felt the woman's soft hands clasp his own in a gesture of comfort.
"I'm so sorry, young man. Your friend is in my prayers." Sugawara thanked her gently. A moment passed.
"So if you don't mind my asking," he said, "why are you here?" The woman took a moment to look down, and Sugawara saw that she was gathering herself, preparing her answer.
"My daughter is in surgery, too. She's had a heart defect since she was born, so we're here a lot."
"I'm sorry."
"Thank-you, but I'm used to hospitals by now. My daughter is a strong woman. I have faith she'll be fine. But whenever she has a procedure done, I like to look around the cafeteria at those who are going through rough times. You see, when I was a young mother, the first time my daughter had surgery, I was an absolute wreck until a kind soul found me and comforted me, talked me out of my despair. Since then, I've made it a point to find the one person in the cafeteria who I could see needed my help the most."
Sugawara felt an overwhelming surge of guilt wash over him before he quickly swallowed it.
"That was me? Why?"
"Because you've consistently looked like you were both on the brink of tears and about to collapse since you walked in here, that and I'm surprised you haven't put a hole in that coffee cup yet, judging from how hard you've been squeezing it." Instinctively, Sugawara relaxed his grip.
"You know what I think?" The woman continued. Sugawara looked her in the eye.
"What?"
"I think you're a very strong young man. And I think that whatever happened to your friend, whatever situation led you to where you are right now, you handled it with maturity and grace. And I don't think you need to berate yourself for that." Sugawara sat dumbfounded for several seconds.
"I - how... Thank-you, ma'am."
It was then that the cafeteria door creaked open and Sugawara looked up to see Ukai, exhausted and disheveled, standing there on the threshold.
How was that? Please leave a review, if you are so inclined. Any and all constructive criticism is greatly appreciated :)
