Chapter One:

Fanfiction vs. Crush 40

Heavanly music began to play as the clouds parted, revealing the multicolored town of FanFiction. The camera zoomed into a white mansion, revealing The Duke of Soleana pouring toothpaste onto Mr. Fiction's toothbrush.

The excess weight caused the man to topple over. The camera moved on to the Speed-E-Shack where Chaos Zero was turning the experation date of milk from 4026 to 4028.

The camera moves ahead to the school where Jet and Scourge are hanging Miles from the flag by his tails.

Inside the classroom, Artemis Hero was repeatedly writing 'I will not flame this fiction' on the black board.

The camera zips over tree tops as Crush 40's Live and Learn is heard. On a barge in Lake Fandom, Crush 40 played the instrumental version, while thousands of spectators, fans, OC's and canon characters alike, cheered and sang along.

Rouge was sitting on Knuckles shoulders, she pulled off her shirt, revealing another shirt that had a big red arrow pointing to Knuckles. The shirt read 'Not My Boyfirend'.

Storm The Albatross was crowd-surfing, though the spectators were having trouble handling such a fat bird.

"Excuse me, my butt is dipping." Storm grunted.

The disgusted crowd dropped the obese bird. walking away. As the band finished their set, they grabbed the microphone.

"Alright, we've been playing for three and a half hours, now we'd just like a moment of your time to say something about the enviorment!" The singer exclaimed.

There was a long pause as the crowd soaked the information up. After the pause, a lot of booing and hissing was made as the crowd chunked everything the could at them. Even an author was thrown into the lake at some point.

"AW, YOU SUCK!" An OC exclaimed.

"PREACHY!" Eggman screamed.

"We're not being preechy." The guitar player called.

"But the polution in your lake! It's dissolving our barge!" The drummer screamed.

The water was eating through the wooden boards, letting the vessle sink.

"I thought they touched on a vital issue." Blaze murmered.

"I beg to differ." Mephiles grunted from his place in the lawncahir next to Blaze. He picked up a rock, throwing it.

Said rock nailed the drummer in the family jewels.

"Oh!" He exclaimed.

The singer...eh, let's call him Dude 1, kay?...Dude 1 put away the instruments, pulling out violins.

"Gentlemen, its been an honor playing with you tonight."

They played the music, recreating the Titanic all over agian. The guitarist lost his balance with a whimper, knocking into Dude 1. The barge sank like a rock.

Everyone stood there for a few seconds before just walking away.

In front of the church, the sign read 'Thou Shalt Turn Off Thy Cell Phone".

Meanwhile, Sonic sighed, going over his Bible while the harpist played the funeral version of It Doesn't Matter.

"For the latest rock band to die in our network, Lord hear our prayers." He said.

"Lord hear our prayers." The crowd repeated.

The screech of tires filled the air, and the sillouets of the Dim Moon Characters were seen through the stained-glass windows.

"I don't understand. Why do I have to go to church every Sunday? Why can't I worship the Lord in my own way, by praying like hell on my death bed?" Dim whined.

"Shh!" Amy hissed. "They might here you!"

"Heh, those pious morons are to busy worshiping their phony-balonie God."

The church doors swung open, and several glares were sent to the author.

"How ya doin'? Peace be with you. Praise Jebus!" Dim greeted.

The 'family' slid into a pew, right next to Uncle Chuck.

Artemis silently played Rabit Blast on the Saberlight TS. Little Cream grabbed the game, throwing it at the nerby Dr. Eggman.

"Today we're going to do something different, I'm going to call on one of YOU!" Sonic exclaimed, pointing at the crowd.

All of the chruch-goers ducked down to avoid being picked.

"OOH! OOH!" Author Unkown shouted.

"What is it Author?" Sonic grunted, tired of calling upon the idiot.

"The good Lord is telling me to confess to something!" He cried.

"Gay, gay, gay, gay, gay!" Amy scowled at the silent whispering of Dim.

"An immodest sense of pride in our community!"

"Ug. Somebody else." Sonic mumbled. "C'mon the word of God dwells within all of us! Let it out!"

A ray of light filtered through the window, aiming for Uncle Chuck. He slupmed forward as he slept, however the light followed him.

He slowly rose, fear in his grey eyes.

"HORRIBLE HORRIBLE THINGS ARE GOING TO HAPPEN!" He screamed. Pointing to Wave, Pixel, and Amy, respectivly, he continued. "AND THEY'RE GONNA HAPPEN TO YOU, AND YOU, AND YOOOOOOOU. Whoa, nellie!"

He fell to the isle, rolling like a spaz on crack. Storm took his Mphone and began recording.

"People of FanFiction! Heed this warning! TWISTED TAIL! A THOUSAND EYES! TRAPED FOREVER! EPA, EPA, EEEEPPAAAAA!"

He rolled around, going "WHOAWHOAWHOA WHOABAH!" like a drunken man with negavtive three brain cells.

"Dim, do something!" Blaze called.

"This book dosen't have any answers!" He flipped through the Bible.

Dim finally rolled the rug up, traping Chuck inside. Draging the rug away, Dim gave a final call of "Thanks for listening!" before leaving the church.

In the Emrada, the family's emerald green SUV, Uncle Chuck sat happily up front.

"Okay, who wants waffles?" Dim asked.

"I do! I do! I do!" Uncle Chuck, Blaze and Artemis replyed.

"Something happened to that man." Amy murmered.

"Pshaw. A certain someone had a senior moment, but we love him, and we got a free rug out of it..." Dim grinned, patting Chuck on the back.

"What's the point of going to church if someone we know has a genuine religous experience and we ignore it?" Amy argued.

"I want bannans on my waffles." Chuck grinned.

"I want syrup!" Artemis cried. "I want strawberries!" Blaze exclaimed.

They drove up to the Food Pyramid, an Egyptian Resturaunt.

"Fine, but I'm not droping this." Amy huffed.

The family got out of the car, leaving Chuck wraped in the rug.

"Wait a minute! I'm still in the car!"

"Oh, right." Dim grunted, rolling down a window before walking off.

"Screw you, Dim, screw you."

A/N: No. Screw you.