Hey everyone, here is the next chapter for you all
Thank you all so much for the reviews, you are all super amazing. I don't know what I did to deserve such great reviewers. I hope that you all enjoy this chapter. Namira, thank you for your long review. I decided to put in some Morgan and Reid for you.
Enjoy and please review
All mistakes are my own
Reid groaned as woke up, he opened his eyes sluggishly. He slowly shuffled out from under the bed, he pulled his cover and pillow out with him and placed them on top of his bed. Reid picked up the lamp from the floor and placed it on the bedside table. Reid began to make his bed, he didn't want to leave his room in a mess.
Reid opened his bedroom door and made his way out to the kitchen, he stopped himself from turning around the corner when he heard Rossi talking.
"He is getting better but he is still scared. He has barely left the house since he came here and when he does he has trouble being around large crowds or other people, he just needs more time to recover," Rossi said. Reid listened silently from around the corner, he wasn't surprised that the team knew he was so scared. He had tried to hide it when he was awake but he knew he was failing miserably. Reid stayed around the corner as they continued to talk.
"Maybe we should take him out for a day, have a picnic with all the team," Garcia suggested.
"We'll have to ask him, it just-" Hotch began to say before he stopped.
"Just what?" Morgan asked.
"Everytime we go on a picnic with Reid, I can't help but remember when he was recovering from his first kidnapping. I can't help but flashback to the moment he tried to wheel himself into the large pond. I'm always keeping an eye on him to make sure that he doesn't try to hurt himself again," Hotch explained.
Reid bit his lower lip and winced as he remembered what they had been talking about. He remembered when he had tried to wheel himself into the pond when no-one has been looking, when he had been so depressed that ending it all seemed the only option. That had been the first time he had felt like that, the second time he had felt so depressed he had almost succeeded in killing himself.
Reid covered his mouth and took a deep breath so the team couldn't hear him. Reid knew that he had to pull himself away from the bad memories inside of his mind. He couldn't think like that anymore. He had to look forward to life, he couldn't think of life being something bad. Reid continued to listen to the team.
"That is back in the past, he isn't like that anymore. He is trying to get back to normal Hotch," Morgan said. "He needs us to be there for him and I'll be damned if I let him fall back into the depression that he felt when he tried to kill himself. He needs us with him to keep him safe, he needs us there to keep him from going over the brink. Trust me when I tell you that-that after what he has been gone through, after what Jacob did to him, he is going to struggle a lot."
The room became silent for a moment as they understood what Morgan was saying.
"We know that he is struggling. Maybe he should talk to someone professional therapist, someone that isn't connected to him personally so that they could help him without getting emotionally involved," Hotch suggested.
Reid snapped back into reality at the mention of seeing a professional. It was then that he decided he needed to speak up.
"Don't m-make me see a p-professional," Reid begged them with a small voice as he stepped out from behind the corner. All four of them turned to see Reid.
"How long have you been there sweetheart?" Garcia asked him as she walked over to his side.
"L-Long enough, I'm trying t-to get better, I really a-am. Pl-please don't make me professional, I d-don't want anyone else k-knowing what happened to m-me, especially a-a stranger," Reid said, his voice wobbling as he was beginning to get himself worked up.
"Hey Reid, its okay. Don't get upset. You don't have to go see anyone that you don't want to. We know that you are trying to get better, we can see that you are getting better," Garcia smiled gently at him. "You make the choices in your life now. Just remember that you have all the time you need to get better."
"I'll try h-harder to get b-better, I'm sorry i-if I'm being a hassle. It is j-just hard to feel s-safe outside after g-going through so much. I feel safe in here b-because I-I can see e-everything, I k-know where everything is and who h-has access to t-the house."
"Reid, you are not a hassle," Rossi spoke.
"Are you s-sure?"
"Yes, I am. How about we stop talking about bad, negative things and we do something for the day. The team has the day off," Rossi said.
"How do you feel about a picnic at the park?" Garcia asked Reid.
Reid bit his lip nervously but decided that some fresh air would be good for him.
"S-Sounds good," Reid smiled gently. Garcia clapped her hands together with excitement before kissing Reid on his cheek.
"Rossi and Hotch, would you help me get a few things together for the picnic?" Garcia said as she knew that Morgan wanted to speak with Reid. The two men nodded and followed Garcia out of kitchen.
Morgan
Morgan walked over to Reid and looked at him. Morgan immediately noticed that Reid was scared.
"Hey Reid, what's wrong?" Morgan asked.
"I-I had a nightmare l-last night, it f-freaked the hell out of me. There was another m-me in my d-dream, a bloody version and b-beaten v-version. He said things, things that really scared m-me," Reid admitted to Morgan.
"What things was this other version saying to you?" Morgan asked with concern in his voice. It worried him that Reid was having such disturbing nightmares. Morgan had to admit that he wasn't surprised by Reid's nightmares, he knew that they would still keep happening. He didn't dare tell the others what dream Reid had had the other night, the night he had had to come and calm Reid down.
"He said th-that he was the p-part of me that wished when J-Jay had kicked the chair from underneath m-me that t-the roped had broken m-my neck. H-He told me the next t-time some-one has a gun to m-my had I-I should just let t-them pull the trigger and e-end it all. He pulled me o-over to a screen and all the bad things that h-have happened to m-me came on the sc-screen. The other version of m-me made me w-watch Jacob when he was attacking m-me," Reid said quickly to Morgan.
"Oh Reid," Morgan sighed. "You don't feel like that, do you?"
"No, I d-don't. I-I just want to f-forget Morgan but I-I can't. I'm tired of dreaming about e-everything," Reid said.
"It's harder to forget things that cause us pain, violent things scar us when we are a victim of them. We just have to let the scars heal to the point where they are almost invisible. Healing takes time and that is what you need. You can talk to me whenever you need, you know that I will always be there for you. Okay, little bro."
"You haven't t-told them the nightmare I-I had that night y-you had to come over. Please d-don't ever tell them, especially G-Garcy," Reid panicked.
"Reid, I won't tell them. I promised that I wouldn't."
"T-Thanks Morgan, thank you for being h-here to talk, t-to understand."
"Anytime kid," Morgan smiled.
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