June 15
Oh, happy day! Shadow came back! I have no idea why, or how, but Shadow's back! I'm almost seventeen years old! Woo hoo! I wonder if Shads will come to my birthday party! Wonder if I'm having one? Maybe I can tell Shadow I love him and break up with Knuckles. He's been getting awful rough lately…
9:15 PM
I can barely lift my hand to write. I can barely grip my pen. But I have to say it here first. Knuckles found out Shadow was back, and…he hit me. A lot. Like we were sparring, but he didn't hold back. I tried to fight him, but the more I fought back, the harder he hit. He almost broke my arm, so eventually I just gave up. I shouted at him for a little while, then he apologized and we went to bed.
Didn't have much of an appetite, so I went to bed without supper. I'm falling asleep as I write…good night.
June 23rd
8:30 AM
My birthday! Yay! Ungh, enthusiasm seems stunted in me today. So I'm seventeen, so what? It's almost been a year—or maybe it has?—since Knux made me his beau. I guess that was a mistake, but whatever. I haven't been eating much, so I pigged out more than usual at my party. Almost the whole cake, and countless chilidogs. After all that, I still don't feel full. Knuckles locked me in a closet for the night "so I don't think about seeing Shadow" and went out drinking.
Tomorrow, I'm breaking up with him. Tomorrow, I'm going to find Shadow.
July 1st
I've been stuck in the closet since my birthday. Woo, woo. I haven't been allowed to go out. I've been peeing in a bottle, which is starting to smell, although I'm so dehydrated, I don't think I can pee anymore. It really smells disgusting in here. I smell, too, so that makes it worse. Can't sleep, because apparently I snore, and Knuckles shouts at me and beats on the door saying "be quiet." I'm afraid he'll hit me, so I shut up and stay quiet. I can barely raise my hand anymore, and I'm starting to feel the bones in my arms.
Dust particle count: 3,349
Finger count: ten
Toe count: shoe.
July…something
Night
Must be niiiggghtt, must be niiiggghhhtt. That's meant to be sung, you know. "It must be night, cause the morning cock hasn't crown. Must be night because I'm hearing moans. My drunken boyfriend vomits asleep. Must be night, must be night. I'm all alone." Getting hungry. Maybe my stomach will growl so loudly that he'll come banging on the door, ha ha, ha ha.
I'm going insane.
Dust particle count: Millions
Finger count: fist
Toe count: shoes.
August
Dawn
Must be August, cause the AC is brutal. I'd kill for a sweater. A nice, warm sweater. I'd even kill for a bath…I'm getting really stinky.
My stomach growls are actually loud enough to warrant drunken shouting. I think I'm hearing voices, because there seems to be more people in our tiny little house.
I'm so tired…all I wanna do is sleep.
Dreaming of strawberries. Do not disturb.
25th August
Noon
There's no one in the house but Knuckles and me. He opened my closet door for the first time in so long. I'm blinded by light. He threw me in ice water to wash me off…I'm still shaking from the cold. My teeth are chattering in my head, messing up my thought process. Heh…train of thought. Where is my train of thought?
I think my conductor went on a lunch break.
I'm cooking now, but not for me. Actually, I'm standing here, shivering, writing in my journal because Knux is asleep. He won't wake up until he smells the sausage and baked beans. He says I can have some later. I've already snuck a few dried beans from the bottom of the can, but it's not enough.
My legs are trembling, but it's from the ice bath. I think my fur is turning to ice. The steam is melting the ice on my eyebrows. The light's still too bright.
Ow. I burned my hand. Actually, it almost feels good. I'm going to stick both hands into the flame and watch my fur burn away.
Night
Finally, I'm allowed to sleep. Knux says there'll be food aplenty for me if I get a good enough rest to perform for him tonight. I can't wait!
Later
Hollow promise. What hell am I in? Knux saved no food for me, and he banged me until I came. The cum burned when it came out, but I suppose that's malnutrition and I'll get used to it.
So sick. I just wanna go home.
Morning
I went for a run. Took my mind off my stomach a bit. Boy, did the rain of the early morning feel good.
August 29th
Nothing remarkable today. Knux got drunk again and threw me into a wall. At least he didn't hit me with a club.
August 30th
Knuckles sprayed me with cold water and threw ice at me. He laughed at my pathetic wincing. It says it builds character. I say it builds colds.
August 31
Sneezing my brains out. Fuck my life.
September 2nd
Still sneezing my brains out. Knuckles isn't letting me drink anything but water. The water tastes like pee.
September 4th
The water he gives me is from the toilet. At least it's before he throws up in it.
Fuck my life.
September 10th
Knuckles threw up on my head. It's disgusting. Some of the vomit got in my eyes.
Knuckles let me take a warm shower. He says if I go on top tonight and do well, he'll feed me.
I don't have much hope.
Later
He locked me in the basement. Woo, woo. Guess I didn't do good enough.
September 11th
I think there's a spider down here. I'm gonna catch it.
September 12th
Lunchtime
I hunted the spider. I remembered stuff I saw on the nature channel and followed their advice, to a tee. Apparently, you're not supposed to narrate for yourself, but oh well.
The spider was a little bigger than my palm. He gave me a nasty bite on my forarm. The blood's dripping onto the page as I write. I'll lick it away later.
If you're wondering why I said the spider 'was,' well…you'd only have to look at me.
Spiders, I think, taste a lot better with ketchup.
Sonic's Commentary
Spiders DO taste better with ketchup!
That was my first time locked in the basement…it was scary down there!
Shadow's Commentary
Sonic can still be funny, even the way he was. Knuckles can be so cruel. Sonic is lucky I rescued him.
