Summary: After a short lifetime of horrible experiences, Sookie thought she finally found her savior, in Eric Northman. Depressed and ready to end it all, she decides to leave this world. Was he in time to truly save her? AU/OOC. This is the Sequel to My Living Hell... I hope ya'll like what I have planned for Vampire Sookie ;)
Disclaimer: Charlaine Harris owns them
Rated M for Adult Content
My Living Death
Chapter 1 - Awakening
SPOV
I thought lying in bed looking at the ceiling…
'What's the point of it all? Why should I wait for him to come and put an end to me? Won't it just be all the more painful to look in his eyes as he kills me? He's already proved that he wants nothing to do with me… but the clothes… why would he have clothes sent if he wants me dead? If he doesn't want me dead, why hasn't he been back? Why did he leave the way he did? God finally! FINALLY! You send someone to save me from my hell, someone I felt happy with, and you take it away. WHAT THE FUCK!'… Well if he doesn't want me, then I don't want to be here anymore. There's nothing left for me and I can't handle him being the one to kill me.
I rolled out of bed and went into the bathroom to run a bath. While it was filling, I went to the medicine cabinet and pulled out a straight razor. I took off my clothes then turned off the water and sank myself into the bath.
"For all the times, I was used as a blow up doll and punching bag." I said as I made a deep swipe at my left wrist and hissed at the pain. I took the razor into my left hand.
"For all the times, that nothing ever went my way." I say as I swipe the razor across the right wrist. No hiss this time, all the pains I've had recently this really is nothing.
"For Jason, I love you bubba… Gran, Mom, Dad. I'm coming." I say as tears start to fall from my eyes. I slowly dig the razor into my arm to get past the skin and muscle to artery there. When the blood gushes out, I take the razor back into my right hand. With it shaking now from the blood I'm losing, I put it up to my left side.
"For Eric." I closed my eyes "Thank you, for saving me. Thank you for showing me what love felt like, if that is what it all was. I love you." I said then dug into my arm. I dropped the razor, sunk back into the water, closed my eyes, and waited for death to take me.
I don't know how long later it was, but I kinda felt like I was being lifted from the tub. Maybe I was… maybe it was just my soul finally being called to heaven… or hell. Like I said I never really believed in God the way the bible talks about him. I knew there was something out there. That looked down… or up… on us all. With the fact that Vampires and other creatures roamed the earth I think it's more believable now. There is something, but what I couldn't tell you. I finally felt the blackness swallow me whole.
When I came back to myself, I opened up my eyes to just black emptiness, nothing to see or hear in any way that I can. I felt tingles all over my body like an electric currant, but I couldn't move. I closed my eyes and drifted off again.
The next time I opened my eyes they did to those beautiful eyes of Eric's, my savior, my love. I suddenly felt a burning desire to drink something. I tried to breathe, but the air got hitched in my throat. I tried to say something, but nothing wanted to come out.
"Sookie" his voice was like silk on my skin. I looked at his mouth and saw his fangs. I felt a pair of my own and touched my tongue to them. My eyes widened in shock and I shot off the bed. He quickly wrapped his arms around me from behind. "Sookie, I know this is all a shock to you. Please let me explain." He said and I saw his child Pam.
She did not look happy at all. A violent hiss escaped my throat and I instinctively wanted to rip her apart as I struggled in Eric's arms. As soon as the sound left my mouth she got into a defensive stance and a let out a hiss of her own. Eric chuckled.
"Pam, the blood." He said to her. She walked over to a table and picked up a few bags of blood and tossed them onto the bed next to us. At the sound of the word, I felt like I was a starving person. With feral snarls coming out of my mouth I tried to grab at one, but Eric kept hold of me.
"Sookie, I'm going to let you go so you can feed. You need to stay calm, Pam is not a threat. I do not want to have to force you behave." he said. I slumped into his hold and nodded, he then put me back down onto the bed.
I watched intently as he picked up a bag and cut a slit into the corner of it. It took everything in me not to rip the bag out of his hands. When he handed it to me I did, I ripped it out of his hands and sucked it down. What spilt out on to my hands, I cleaned off with my tongue. Then he opened another and handed it to me, again I attacked it, by the fourth bag I was sated, but not fully.
"Feeling better?" Eric asked reaching his hand up, I suspiciously eyed it out the corner of my eye. When I felt it weave in my hair and begin to stroke it, another hunger rose in me.
"Fuck me Eric." I said as I threw the bag down and threw myself at him. I began to kiss his lips and grind myself into him. He chuckled again. I growled then stopped short, at the sound coming out of me.
"There will be time for that later, little one. Do you not want to know what is happening?" He said. I looked at him confused.
"Duh… you made me a Vampire, that's kinda obvious…" I said picking up another bag and sinking my fangs into it. A peal of laughter came from Pam. "How did you do it, though? I thought I was dead." I said as I looked up from bag-o-blood.
"I got here in time, to make the change." He said.
"When do I get the real thing, this doesn't taste right." I asked my face squished my face up in distaste.
"Oh Eric, you're going to have your hands full with this one." She said in a sarcastic tone.
"It will be nothing new, I assure you Pamela." He said dryly still looking at me. She harrumphed crossing her arms rolling her eyes. "It will take some time for that, little one. With all the new changes and cravings your body has, you will need to remain here. Once I feel you are ready, I'll take you hunting…" he started saying but I interrupted him.
"Hunting? I don't want to kill anyone and I don't think its right to take someone unwillingly, in any way." I looked at him steely. He smiled and caressed my cheek. I leaned into his touch as I reached out to stroke his cock. He took my hand away and I pouted.
"Pam and I do not kill to feed. Being a newly risen Vampire you must first learn to control your instincts. I will bring someone home to you, if you can show restraint then you may come to Fangtasia." He said and I looked at him worried. "Do not worry little one, I will be here with you through everything. That brings me back to all I need to tell you…" he started, this time Pam interrupted him.
"And I'm bored. I'll be at Fangtasia if you need me, Master." She said walking out of the room.
"She doesn't like me." I stated.
"She is just a little jealous. Pam is the only Child I have made until you, and she has never left my side, even after I've released her. I may have indulged her a little too much." He said and he had a faraway look that made me a little jealous.
"So then tell me." I said picking up another bag and sinking my teeth into it squeezing the stuff into my mouth.
He told me of what to expect with the change and I filled it all away. He told me about the Bond that a Maker and Child has, and how he will be able to control me through it. I didn't think that was necessary, I loved him. There wasn't nothing that he could ask, that I wasn't willing to do. I asked him if I'd be able to feel him like I did Bill. He told me he doesn't leave the link to himself open to his Child unless there is a dire need for it, but he'd always be able to feel me as he does Pam. I suddenly thought of my Telepathy and if that I still had the ability. I opened myself up to Eric and didn't hear anything he was thinking. I still heard the words from his mouth.
"Eric" I thought. He stopped talking and looked at me with confusion. "Did you hear that?" I asked.
"Yes, how odd. I can speak to Pam mentally, but I only get emotions back from her." he looked at me suspiciously.
"I guess I should have told you before. I never told anyone, not even my brother knew." I looked at him his face went stoic. "I'm Telepathic." I said and he quirked an eyebrow. I took that mean he wanted more of an explanation so I told him. "I'm able to hear human minds as if they were talking to me. I couldn't hear any Vampire minds… they're empty to me, but I can still sense them. I noticed that at Fangtasia. Maria Star, hers is different. It's messy… like looking at a TV screen not in focus or hazy and I see colors." He continued to stare at me. I waited for him to speak.
"I wonder if that was the reason you were immune to glamour, but…" he said out loud, but in my head I heard his voice and the heaviness of it hit me like a truck. I got off the bed and sank to my knees in front of him. "What did you feel just then, you hesitated."
"I heard you, it kinda hurt and I did what you asked." I told him and looked up at him. He didn't look pleased.
"What's the matter Eric?" I asked worried sitting back on the bed.
"You did what I asked? Did you feel compelled to do it?" He asked
"What do you mean compelled?" I asked.
"I'm going to command you again if you do not feel the need to do it, don't." He said and then again I felt like getting hit by a truck, but I didn't move. His eyes opened wide in shock. Then it went to one of sadness like the last time I saw him.
"What is it Eric? What are you thinking? Please tell me." I said panicked.
"This will be a problem. I can't compel you through the Bond. I will…"
"What! After all this shit your gonna kill me anyway!" I shot off the bed. "Eric, I killed myself 'cause I thought you didn't want me. You SAVED me." I said and sat back onto the bed and whispered. "Please… you gave me another chance, don't take it away. I'll do anything, anything, you ask me." I looked into his eyes "I swear." I begged. I got off the bed and sank to my knees with my head bowed. I knew the drill.
"Master, I am yours." I said. It felt like forever, he still didn't respond. He finally sat on the bed then put his finger under my chin and tipped it to look in my eyes.
"You do not need to address me as such, unless we are in the presence of other Vampires." he said and pulled me up to stand.
I was at the perfect level with his lips so I went for it. I wanted him more than I did before. He returned my kiss and I ripped his shirt off and pushed him back onto the bed, I was amazed at the strength I had now. I climbed up then started kissing his chest. I thought about how weird it was doing all of this with the fangs, but I found it easy. I haven't cut him or myself on them yet. I guess that was part instincts he talked about.
With the amazing speed I've seen them use, I tore off all of my clothes and his jeans, then jumped up and straddled him. I started grinding myself on him and he growled, he picked me up and hovered to the middle of the bed. When he entered me I felt like that circuit of electricity running through my body had been completed. It surged through me every time he'd thrust back into me. I couldn't hold myself back, another instinct took over me and I bit into his neck. His blood was like nothing I've ever tasted before. It was sweet like candy and the most delicious thing I've ever tasted, but it didn't do anything for my hunger. He let out a yell of something in another language and shot in me while I contracted around him with my own orgasm.
We didn't stop. We had sex for hours. It felt like we were dancing. We were both alternating positions, me on top of him, then him on top of me all over the room. He had me up against the wall pounding into me with incredible speed. I bent to his neck and bit and he did the same to my shoulder. With one final explosion he pulled away and I whimpered at the lost. He chuckled and said that we had an eternity if I wanted more. He reminded me that he had other responsibilities and he had to go. Before he left he told me about the blood if I got hungry again and how to prepare it. He kissed me again then left for Fangtasia. I lain in bed staring at the ceiling… I felt powerful and for the first time in my life I felt alive.
.
EPOV
I sat next to her hoping that I was not to late getting to her, she was too close to death. I also worried of how she would be when she rose, knowing she was emotionally broken to extreme of committing suicide. I feared her mind would not be whole, I felt guilt and despair over my part in it.
On the second night I felt the Bond form between us, I knew she would indeed rise again. I went to acquire blood for her rising.
On the third night, Sookie was due to rise I called my child Pam through the Bond. When she arrived I felt her shock and jealousy at the sight of Sookie. I was about to turn and tell her my reasons, but just then Sookie's eyes opened. I waited for her to speak, when she did not I said her name. I felt her fear and confusion and I quickly took hold of her and tried to calm her. I was amused at her reaction to seeing Pam.
I asked Pam to bring the blood so I could get her calm enough to talk to her. I did not want to force my will on her. I was nothing like my Maker. I did not believe in using my power or fear to make a child obedient.
After a few bags she seemed calm enough. I stay aware of her reactions to everything around her and I am pleased of her instincts. When I touch her she reacts to it normally. I reluctantly pull her away needing to discuss more important things. She is coherent and her witty personality that drew me to her to begin with was still intact. At the mention of hunting, I am surprised that after all that she has experienced, she was reluctant to and still grasped to her humanity, then again being a newborn she would not lose it yet. I am relieved that I was not too late in getting to her.
I tell her of everything being a Vampire entails. It seems as if she is processing all I am saying like a computer storing knowledge for future reference. I tell her of the Bond and answer her questions. I continue to tell her of important things, such as the Vampire hierarchy and suddenly hear her voice call my name. I did not see her mover her lips and it confused me.
She tells me of her telepathy I voice out loud my musings of her resistance to glamour, I then command her to kneel to me while watching her every movement and she hesitates. When I realize that like Compton, I too cannot control her through the Bond, I am saddened by it. I feel she will be an intriguing Vampire with or without the telepathy. I wanted nothing but to keep her with me, but no Maker wants the trouble of a baby Vampire that cannot be controlled. Resigned, I tell her what I am thinking and what I have to do, but her plea makes me falter. She is right, I left her. She would still be human if I did not abandon her for my own confused emotions.
I feel her lust and desire for me and I give my Child what she needs, now that she has been fed. The experience of being inside her is as the first time, exhilarating, electric. Not even with my child Pam I have felt this way. She is truly spectacular. I couldn't be more proud of my choice to turn and keep her. I look forward to molding her into a fearsome Vampire. After hours of satisfying her need for pleasure, I pull away and I am amused at her reaction.
"We have an eternity if that is your wish, little one." I say to her soft cry. "You do remember that I have other responsibilities to contend with and I must speak to Pam." I say and kiss her once more then I went to take a shower.
"There is more blood if you need in the refrigerator. You can heat it up in the microwave if you want it warmer. It will taste a bit better." I told her as I dried and dress to go.
"Okay." She said propping herself up on her elbows. "What am I supposed to do while you're gone? I'll be bored." She pouted. I mentally sigh. Why am I drawn to the ones who are amusing but difficult?
"My office here is open to you now; there is a library in there. You enjoy reading, right? There's always TV. You will be fine and I'll be back before dawn." I kiss her on the top of her head and leave.
When I arrived at the club, I walked into my office and find my first Child sitting on the sofa. I feel that she is hurt and confused.
"Pam, what is it?" I ask as I sat at my desk.
"Why did you turn her?" she asked not looking at me.
"I do not know. I was planning on ending her, but when I found her near death I just could not bear losing her. She is special Pamela." I reply.
"What's so special about her?" she huffed "You can't feed from her now and you have your choice of women… Vampire or Human to fuck."
"What is it that bothers you exactly? I know my sex life is no concern of yours."
"You didn't tell me you did it, until I got there I had no idea." She said looking down to the floor. I walked over to her and squatted in front of her. She looked up to me with bloody tears welling in her eyes. Through the Bond I get that she feels betrayed.
"You must trust me. Have I ever given you reason to not trust me?"
"No Master, of course not." She said matter of fact. I could feel the tiny bit of jealousy I felt earlier.
"Pamela, you know you are special to me as well. I am so proud of you my Child. Sookie will be a great addition to us." I said and she still did not look convinced. "I wish for you to remain at my side, but I have released you. If you no longer wish to remain then you are free to leave." I say sadly.
"I suppose I'll get used to my new little sister." She said in that sarcastic way of hers. I smiled at my Child and felt relief that she will remain. I rise and walk back over to my desk to look at invoices. "So, everything turn out I take it. You seem a bit uplifted from the past few days." She walks over and perches on my desk. "Tell me what's so special about this girl that you decided to turn her." She said examining her nails.
"She said as a human she was Telepathic." I say and she shoots me a shocked look.
"Get the fuck out?" she says and I grin. I am amused at her use of the modern vernacular. "So?" she prods.
"It is not safe for her to be around humans yet and I will have to keep Maria Star away from her. We will give her a week to get used to everything then we'll test it out." I rise and tapped a finger on her nose "I told you she was special." I decide to sit out into the club rather than the tedious task of looking over paper work.
"Of course. You do have exquisite taste when it comes to choosing children. Look at me… and I have to admit she does look delicious." She says as we make our way into the club to enthrall the vermin.
A/N: Do you like? PLEASE REVIEW
