I guess I should start with who I am, since no story can make sense unless you know who it's being told about. Every story need it's characters.. and I am quite the character, let me warn you.. and you can take this warning however you'd like. In all honesty, I don't care what you think of me, before, after, or during my story.
I am The Phantom Illusionist, number XV of the Organization, and apprentice of Zexion. My name, you may ask? Xanekillen.. but once, my name was Kellianne. That was before I became a Nobody, back when I was a.. Somebody, I guess you could say, if you'd like. Back where my story is going to start.
I don't know how long ago it was.. I don't have any memory of the time spans anymore. But back when I was a Somebody, I had a Boyfriend.. well.. a Ex-Boyfriend. I loved him more then anything, but he didn't return the feelings. We were together for only offically together for a few days when he broke up with me, he told me he didn't like me that way.
I was crushed.. but I still loved him. He avoided me after that, though.. I barely saw him, and when I did, he brushed me off and hurried away. Yet I couldn't just stand back and watch that day, that horrible day. The fact that I became what I am now that day isn't what hurts me, even yet, it's what he did, or rather, what he didn't do.
I guess I should explain what I mean, right? Well, it started one afternoon, when the Darkness began to take over my home. Heartless were swarming everywhere, like a bunch of oversized black ants when you disturb them, and everyone in my town was in a frenzy.. wouldn't you be if your world was about to be destroyed, and you had no escape?
Everyone was pushing and shoving, screaming and panicing.. it was pure chaos, unleashed upon my little town, which was usually so sleepy and idyllic.. the town never even seemed to have that big of a population until I saw them that day, scattering and fleeing the Heartless.
I was trying to escape like everyone else was, until I saw him.
My Ex.. he was being attacked by the Heartless, atleast a handfull of them.. and he wasn't managing to fend them off. As soon as he managed to get one back, another one had recovered and moved in once more. I wanted to turn away and pretend I hadn't seen him in such a horrible situation, but, I couldn't.
Instead, I pushed through the swarms of paniced people, and slammed into a Heartless, causing a chain reaction as it hit another, and another. As soon as they had regained their balance, they turned on me, forgetting my Ex. I remember his expression so clearly.. he had looked so confused about why they had stopped, it was almost adorable.
Then he noticed me.
I remember the look changing from confusion to shock and disdain, and then, as he looked to the Heartless, I had seen fear.
Then he turned and started to leave.. leaving me to the Heartless. I remember him hesitating and looking back.. I guess he was remembering our friendship before we were together, and maybe thinking of the fact I had just saved him. Then he had turned his back once more.
I remember the Heartless moving in more, surrounding me, as I looked after him despretely, trying my best to keep them back alone. In no time, before he had even moved five feet, they were overwhelming me. I can remember it all so clearly.. I wish I could remember everything else about my life this clearly.
"Please! Help me! I need you!" I remember I had called that out as he started to leave, my eyes had been clouding with tears, but I saw him look back with a frown. We both knew I wasn't just talking about needing him then.. we both knew I still loved him.
"I told you, Kelli, I don't like you that way.." Those words hit me hard that moment, and they only hit harder as he turned and ran away, leaving me. After that, it all went black, the Heartless won, and my Ex left me for death.. or whatever else may have awaited me.. or rather, my Somebody.
So, that's how Zanekillen.. me.. came to be. I can't explain further, as it seems I have arrived at my destination. I hope this has clarified more for you, as, if it hasn't, I won't be explaining anymore- you'll have to wait and see for yourself.
