Some very sexual content here, just saying.
I did not really intend to fall alseep, but I did and when I woke up Max was sitting at the little table at the corner of the room where we did the video chat earlier doing something on the laptop that I couldn't see because his back was facing me. I could hear his fingers banging on the keyboards rapidly, which gave me the impression that he might break it.
Ok, so he's back from wherever he scattered off to. I wasn't even sure if I was in it to tell him what's going on right now. The fear was practically eating me inside and I didn't know how to shoo it away, but Max is here now and I guess I'll just have to deal with it.
I sat up and began to stretch my arms out and twist out my back until I heard those feel-good cracks, then I sighed satisfyingly. Max turned his head back to look at me, giving me a hearty smile that sent my heart racing to the finish line. I smiled back to keep my cool.
"I was wondering when you'd wake up, Sleeping Beauty.", Max bantered.
I just giggled. "How long was I asleep?", I asked him.
"I haven't got a clue. You were already snoring away when I came back to check on you."
"Which was when?"
"Twenty minutes ago, I think."
If he has been back for twenty minutes and I was already sleeping, then God knows how long I was asleep in total. "Where'd you go?", I asked.
"I just went to the little coffee shop downstairs.", Max answered. "I couldn't really leave the hotel in all, I didn't want to. I didn't want to be too far away from you in case you need someone with you." He moved the chair for his whole front body to face me. He ran a hand through his grayish hair. I've never been so jealous of a simple body part like the hand. "Dude, I was just really worried about you. You looked so depressed, like as if something's got you beaten down."
A part of me felt flattered that he was so concerned for me, but the other half felt panicked because he may suspect what's going on. Ok, maybe not suspect it exactly or know what it is, but I became so nervous all of a sudden. Putting the anxiousness aside, I went along with the conversation. "Well, that's nice of you to think that, but, really, I'm fine-"
"No, you don't, Nev.", Max cut me off immediately. "You don't look fine, to be honest."
I immediately got defensive. "H-how c-come?", I stuttered.
"When you are, you're chipper and active and not giving a shit. When you aren't, you're like earlier. You want to be left alone in a room by yourself and not have anything to do with anyone. You become the total opposite of who you really are."
"Well what's wrong with wanting to be left alone for a moment?", I argue. "Maybe I like to be left alone."
"But, you don't!", Max fired back, now frustrated. "You don't like to be alone. I know you, Nev. You're like a pre-school picture book to a college student, too easy to read off of."
The remark left me silenced, and my nerves were all over the place like Mexican jumping beans. He was right, though. I don't like to be alone. I'm terrified of being alone with no one to be with me. I don't want to be alone because I feel that everyone you've ever cared about and loved but pushed away forgets about you and treats you like a stranger afterwards, like they've never known you. It takes you a lifetime to find just that one person, whether it be a friend or a lover or even a family member, that will always say they'll stick by your side and permanently mean it, to say they'll never abandon you and promise it.
Being betrayed sucks, and it leaves a deep hole in your ability to believe in something or someone as true, and you're left with a colossal sack of heartbreak and trust issues. I've not only seen it, but I've felt it jab me like a spear through my body, and I've experienced the numbness the bitch named Betrayal left me with as a side effect.
Max is that one person that one takes forever to find to me, and I'm petrified that if things get too intense or rough he may be gone and leave me so lost and empty. I want to know if I can trust Max if he'll stay when I tell him everything.
Speaking of Max, he was now suddenly sitting beside me on the bed waving a hand in front of my face, calling me out of my internal thoughts. "Nev.", he said for only he knows how many times he's repeated my name until I finally look at him.
Just one look at him was what made me finally come clean.
"Max," I started out in a soft, timid voice, "you're right. I hate being alone. I just wanted to be that way today because...well, I needed to do some venting out on my own."
"Vent out about what?", he asked me. "What's going on with you right now? Was it about Antwane and Carmen, because you've been acting weird since the video chats."
"It wasn't just them, Max. It's all of the people we've helped that got catfished by some psychopath, including me."
Max looked at me as if I was speaking in a foreign language. "I don't really understand what this is about.", he confessed.
"Ever since my Megan/Angela chapter, trust issues have come my way, and when we're helping these victims of catfishing they get stronger as they keep coming back. I'm always reminded of when it was me in their shoes." I stopped talking when I heard my voice become cracked again. I hung my head and put my hands to my face, groaning. "It's like I'm dreaming the same nightmare over and over again.", I mumbled.
I felt Max's hand on my shoulder, patting me gently. Then, he spoke. "Hey," he began, "it's alright, Nev. You'll get over it. You always do." His voice was in a whispering tone, so low and soothing and comforting. Just hearing it sent a wave of ease all over me, and his hand touching me calmed me down more. That's the power of Max when he's consoling me.
"That's what I always tell myself, Max, and I try to do just that. It fails whenever we help someone. It will always be with me."
"If it bothers you so much with it being like this, then we can just end it right now, just pull the plug on the show."
I lift my head to look at Max. "No, Max. It doesn't have to be that way.", I tell him. "As much as the pain constantly comes back, I enjoy every second of this job. We give these people the closure that they deserve after going through all the heartbreak and disappointment, even if the outcome is saddening. It's a good thing we're doing."
Max sighed agitatedly and put up his hands as if he was told to by a cop after being pulled over. "Fine, Nev. Whatever you want, I guess." Max got up for a split second until I instantly grabbed his hand, clenching it tight desperately. He stared down at me with an expression of bemusement.
"There's something else I have got to tell you.", I confessed.
"There's more?"
"Just sit back down." My heart was like an intense drumroll on a loop, just giving off thunderous claps, like a rabbit thumping its foot. It was now time to come clean with a second confession.
Max sat back down beside me, waiting for what else there is that I have to say. My stomach felt like as if billions of ladybugs were fluttering their wings all at once in groups. My heart was beating at a much faster rate than seconds ago and I can hear the rhythm as they travel up to my ears. I licked my lips as they felt as dry as a desert. My palms became sweaty as they moved up and down on my lap until they suddenly stopped on their own and my nails dug deep into my jeans. I haven't been this apprehensive since going to Ishpeming, Michigan to meet Abby and...fuck, why does the memory always have to come back when I don't want it to?
"Nev," Max spoke, "you are starting to scare me. You're acting as if you've just killed a guy."
I inhaled and then exhaled a large breath of air, and I finally pulled myself together and formed the first sentence. "Max, I seem to be falling in love with you, and I've accepted that because I indeed am." I waited for his remark, expecting it to come as soon as I made my confession, but it took longer that I thought. Max didn't say anything, he just sat where he was and stared at me.
Oh, please, Max. Say something, say something.
"How long have you felt this way?", Max finally said in a voice so hushed that I wasn't sure if he was bashfully elated, or panicked.
"Well, for quite a long while, I should say." I answered him the best way I could without looking like a complete nervous-wrecked blockhead.
"Nev, I want to know exactly how long. Be specific.", he demanded.
"Alright, alright." I took a breath, and I returned my eyes to his, looking him dead in the eye. "I've felt this way since we've first started working together on this series, and when we started getting so close as not only partners, but as friends."
Max's brows raised just an inch to show a little change of expression. "That long?", he catechized.
"You wanted me to be specific, there it is.", I said. "You went from being my friend, to my best friend, then to someone I've come to extremely care for so much that I don't even think is normal for a guy to feel for his best guy friend. You've become someone that's almost like a savior to me. I-I love you, Max." The tears from hours ago had returned to the surface of my eyes, and in an instant they became watery. I knew for sure that I put on a distressed face.
Max continued to give me a remark of silence, which made me frustrated. "Why are you just looking at me like that, Max?!", I shouted. "Say something!"
"That's the thing, I don't know what to say.", he told me.
"Max, I just told you that I love you. I'm practically giving you my heart. I demand something back!" I was just enraged. I was still shouting, and my tears were running down my face. As I was talking I was pounding a fist on the palm of my other hand to show just how angry I am.
"I'm sorry, Nev.", Max said. "I'm just so...so taken back that you, of all people that are out there, are in love with me." His elbows were on his laps and his face met his hands. He groaned what sounded like to be an exhausted one. "I have to take a moment to take all of this in."
This was the end of the line for me. "Dammit, Max! Don't do this to me! I can't have anymore heartache!" I put my hands to Max's face so that our eyes are at the same level, so he could see the sorrow and need in my flooding eyes. "I can't have anymore heartache.", I repeated. "Please, don't be another Angela in my life."
"Another Angela?", he questioned.
"What I meant was I don't want anymore disappointment when it comes to wanting a romantic relationship with someone. That's what has kept me from being too close with someone I love." I paused just to let my voice regain from sounding so broken and saddening. "I'm scared of going through all of it again."
Max gave me a look of bemusement again. "You think I'm going to disappoint you like she did?"
"Not only that, but I don't want you to be like the rest of them, the catfishes. I was very cautious when it even came to telling myself that I'm falling for you, because I don't want to take a chance of giving my heart to someone that'll abuse it."
At this, Max shook his head gradually. Then, to my own shock, a grin began to form on his beautiful face little by little. "Nev, you don't have to be afraid. You shouldn't have to feel that way. I would never do anything like that to you."
A part of me felt a bit at ease when he said that, but I still felt the fear nibbling on my heart strings like someone trying their best to finish off their meal even when they're full. "Please don't say that unless you mean it, Max. If I say I trust you with how I feel, don't take advantage of it for your own want."
"I do mean it, Nev. You should know me way enough by now to know I'll keep a promise. Heck, I'll say it thousands or even billions of times just to convince you I'll be the real deal." Max began to laugh, which forced me to crack a well needed smile.
I looked down at his lips, and I didn't hesitate to kiss him right then and there. I slowly touched them with mine, shutting my eyes. Within a second, I felt Max pushed his lips against mine just as softly as I did, then we stopped. We looked at each other. "H-how did that feel?", I bashfully asked, hoping that he didn't think this first kiss was terrible.
"I gotta say, it felt weird." Max chuckled. "But every beginning to an amazing relationship starts out that way."
It was like a tidal wave of relief and enchantment splashed over me at this exact moment, and I smiled like a bride on her wedding day as she walks down the aisle. I probably looked like a goof with my enlarged ecstatic smirk, but I didn't care. I was so joyous that I pressed my lips against Max's again. This time, I was not too shy, and neither was Max when I felt him immediately kiss me back, wrapping his hands around my waist.
Our kisses were fast and needy, steamy and full of passion, opposite of the previous one that was shy and just a little itty bitty peck. My fingers moved to Max's mouth, pulling his lower jaw down just a bit to get my whole tongue in. When I heard him give a low moan I was switched to becoming aroused lustfully. That one little sound got me hooked in an instant.
I pulled Max closer to me as I began to lay on my back on the bed. My hands took a life of their own as they dug themselves in his grayish hair, exploring every hair on his scalp. When we paused to breathe I looked up at him, panting. "Max, I so desperately want you to make love to me.", I whispered. "If it's too soon for you, however, then I understand." I felt stupid for saying that afterwards because I knew that this is what I wanted, for Max and I to already move on up another step even though it's happening too fast.
"It's too late to back out.", Max answered back, cracking a smile. "We're already in this position and in this mood. It'd be a waste if we just stop right now."
I grinned. "I'll take that as the green light."
We both began to crack up like mischievous boys in class, but it gave me the privilege to see his dazzling, wide smile. Max leaned down to continue where we left off, kissing me sensually. My hands rested on Max's neck as our tongues moved in motion together. I felt Max's own hands go under the white shirt that lay under my red sweater, moving up and down my skin. I can even feel them move against the hair on my chest. His hands were warm, and I enjoyed his bare touch. When one hand hit the jackpot and found one nipple, pressing down on the sensitive area, I was had.
My mouth broke away as I whimpered Max's name in a sigh. Seeing as I enjoyed it, Max pressed harder which made me moan louder. I became even more turned on at the moment, and I grew impatient with Max's teasing. I didn't even bother taking off the sweater and T-shirt one by one, I just grabbed the bottom of both and pulled them over my head and tossed them aside.
"Yeah, yeah, I like that.", Max said as he unbuttoned his jacket and taking it off his shoulders before taking off his chemise, tossing both aside as well. He gazed down at my chest and grinned. "You know, I think this will be the only time I won't mind your gorilla chest hair.", he chuckled.
"Haha, very funny.", I sarcastically remarked.
Max brought his head down to my neck, kissing then sucking on the skin. I sighed and moaned as he did this, my hands smoothly sliding down his back, letting my fingers get use to the feeling of his skin. Max's lips moved down to my left shoulder, making me give tiny cackles from the ticklish feeling of the soft pecking. "You're loving this.", Max said softly. I could hear the amusement in his voice. I felt his hot breath on my skin, giving me goosebumps.
"Mmm, yes.", I murmured. Max licked from my shoulder to right in the middle of my chest, between my nips. His mouth was warm and inviting on my naked skin as he frantically massaged my upper body with his lips, hoping that the hairs on my body don't get in the way. As much as this felt great, it wasn't enough satisfactory, though. It wasn't giving me that wild feeling that I'm searching for. It wasn't enough to feed my hunger from Max. No offense to him because I did say that I'm really liking what he's doing, but this is boring shit.
I said what I wanted, or needed in this case, and I want it to be clear to him once more.
My hands automatically went to my jeans as if they were programmed to do just that only and I unbuttoned and unzipped them. "I said I wanted you to make love to me, and that is what we're going to do, Max. Enough of this friggin' slow build-up. Take them off now!" I had no idea I could sound so demanding, like a bossy Bridezilla, but if I say I want something so desperately then I want it done, and if it won't go through the person I need it from then I'll make it go through their think skull again.
"Oh, impatient are we?" Max grinned. "Well alright then." He did the same as I just did and we both pulled down what was the rest of our attire. The immediate freedom of our manhoods made them spring up and be fully exposed. If I was the first or only one with my penis out I would have been pretty bashful, but I wasn't and my love was exposed with me, making me feel relaxed. "I gotta ask, though, how you want me to do this, Nev."
"Do whatever, just as long as it's only you doing it, Max.", I replied. "It's you I want, Max. It's you." As cheesy as it sounded, it was true. I've never truly wanted anyone as much as I wanted Max, and "Megan" doesn't count.
"Well, in that case..." Max adjust himself to be lower than me until (oh, God) his head was at the same level as my cock. What he did next had me taken aback. He took me in his mouth and slowly started to move his head back and forth, back and forth.
I gasped at first, then as Max progressed, putting in a little speed, I began to groan, then it turned to repeated moans. "Max.", I murmured. "O-ohh." The back of my head sank into the cushiony pillows, my chest moved in and out as I took in and took out hot breaths of air, and my eyes shut tight.
When Max went faster that's when my mind went crazy and my volume turned up. "O-oh, Max! Max, ugh!" I began to squirm in the bed like a fussy baby in a stroller. My mouth was stuck in an O shape as air continued to escape from my lungs. My hands went over my head and up to the top of the board of the bed, my fingers tightening on it. My hips bucked uncontrollably into Max's mouth like a mule bucks it's back legs, hoping that I wasn't making him uncomfortable. "Oh, my god, Max.", I moaned. I tried to moan through shut lips so I wouldn't make any loud noise, but Max was making pleasurable electric vibrations run all through my body, making me whimper like a puppy. "Ahhh."
I was already getting ready to release myself in his mouth, but somehow Max knew that and, to my dismay, took his lips away from my member. I whined like a child that didn't get any ice cream from Dairy Queen and I looked up at Max as he moved back up to where we were the same level. "Why did you stop?", I complained.
"Because I wasn't fully done yet.", Max answered. "I couldn't let you climax just yet."
"W-whataya mean?"
"You'll see." Max's fingers touched my legs and slid down them, telling me to seperate them just a little more. When I did Max positioned himself between my legs, his groin against mine down there. I could already tell what was about to happen next.
"Max..."
Max propped up on his hands, having his arms straight, his hands on the bed as well as his knees, and he gently began to grind his own self against mine, staring down at me. "Tell me if it hurts you, Nev.", he said in a comforting tone, pumping his hips back and forth more deeper every time. With every push I received shocks of pleasure that jolted all throughout my insides again, and I was starving for more of the electrifying feeling.
"Hurts? Max, I'm...ohhh, Jesus...I'm loving this." I moaned a long whimper and I rolled my head side to side before gazing up at Max, staring into those gorgeous hazel eyes of his. "Don't worry about me, just keep going."
"Nev."
"What, Max?"
He stopped pushing to lean his head down and give me a sensuous kiss on my lips, giving out a low moan himself, nipping on my bottom lips roughly. When done he murmured, "I've never been so turned on by another man like you're doing to me." Our foreheads touch as his fingers touch the sides of my face. I could feel the warm air from his nose as he breathed. Then, he proceeded to get all of him inside "that spot" of me down there, not stopping until he succeeds. "Nev.", he pant.
At last, his entire self was in and Max began thrusting on me quite forcefully, getting us both to groan and pant and pretty much turn up the volumes of our voices. The electric sensation that I've been craving for from Max was finally fusing in me from the very intimate area of my lower half that Maxwell Joseph was grinding on.
My head sank into the pillows again as I gave a high pitched sigh, getting my jaw to get that letter O shape again. Max licked and kissed my neck before burying his face in it, feeling his heated breath on my skin. "N-N-Nev." His ruffled gray hair was tickling and scraping my chin, and I could smell the scent of his AXE shampoo from this morning, the sweet smell filling up my nostrils.
Max thrusted even more forcibly, making me yelp, making me go crazy. "Oh Max!", I wailed. "Mmm y-yes...yes!" I bit down on my bottom lip to not make any much loud noise that'll make anyone outside the room or even in the next room get the impression that I'm in danger. I thought my battered lip was about to draw a line of blood because I was biting it so hard.
I placed my hands on Max's back before setting them on his bucking hips, my hands moving with them in motion, maybe even guiding Max's pelvis to work quicker even if the rhythm he has right now is just the icing on the cake. Then again, however, there's nothing wrong with an extra boost.
"Mmm...Nev!", Max whined. His voice sounded hoarse against my neck. He pumped himself over and over, giving gasps that became higher and higher in sound, until I felt something fluid and intensively warm enter my body, hearing Max give a cry like a hawk's as he began to decrease his thrusting.
It took me a moment to finally realize what it was that entered me from Max until I realized that he had just spent himself in me. The realization was the final touch for me, and it was my turn to climax what I was trying to hold in until it was that time. That time was now as Max gave his final shoves before stopping at last. I gave one last groan.
Max and I spent minutes, or what felt like hours flying by, regaining normal breathing rates to even do or say anything. Max lifts his head and our eyes met. I could see the exhaustion in his eyes and the energy drained from his face. I smiled up at him and gave him a kiss on his lips. He rest his entire body on top of mine, skin touching skin, and sighed as his head rested on my chest before changing his mind and rolled over to the other side of the bed next to me. "I don't want your disgusting body hair on my face.", he murmured, cracking a smile.
"Well that's romantic of you to say right after we just had sex, sweetie.", I joked, smiling myself.
Max rolled on his left side and I rolled on my right, the both of us just staring at each other, grinning and cracking up for probably no apparent reason. Maybe it was because we were naked and considering the fact that we just had sex with each other; maybe it was because we would have never thought that we'd end up like this, the realization taking us by surprise; maybe it was because we went from being best friends to soul mates in minutes worth.
"Max," I spoke, "how are you feeling right now?"
"Exhausted.", he answered.
"No. I meant about us. How are you feeling about all of this?"
"Well..." Max took his time to gather his thoughts before looking at me again. "I've got to say that it still feels so weird." I thought my heart was going to shatter and the goosebumps were going to rise on my skin, until Max's fingers brushed my cheek tenderly. "It's just going to take some time to get use to the big change, but we'll make it work."
I sighed with full relief, and my fingers intertwined with Max's. "You sure you're in this with me?"
"I'm in, for real, but promise me that you'll let the fear go and I'll promise that I won't make it come back, because what that bitch Angela did to you is something I'll never do to you."
Looking into Max's eyes, I knew he meant it for sure. "Ok.", I whispered. Max smiled, I smiled back.
"You know why we're going to make this new relationship work?", he said.
"Why?"
"Because if I say that I'm in for real then I'm really in. I never make a promise I don't keep, Yaniv."
He was right.
End
