Disclaimer: I do not own Grey's Anatomy, I'm trying not to think about that. In my own perfect world, I own it.

I'm back, I hope you like it...at least a little. I know its been done before but I'm planning on throwing in a quite surprising twist to make it even more crazy.


"Meredith," Bailey walked into Meredith's room, where luckily none of her friends had found her yet, "You need a CT scan and an MRI." Bailey ripped the bandage off; she didn't want to scare Meredith before she had to.

"Why?" Meredith asked worried, sitting up, "I didn't get injured...I...whats wrong, Dr. Bailey?" Bailey turned around so she wasn't facing Meredith and grimaced.

"I just...its your headaches, Meredith," Bailey frowned, "If a headache makes you pass out in the middle of brain surgery, then its worth getting concerned about." Meredith sighed deeply and looked at Bailey.

"I know there is something you aren't telling me," Meredith said, picking at her hospital band, "What aren't you telling me?"


Bailey sighed heavily, looking at Meredith's scans again. She knew that she was about to continue to break the constantly breaking heart of Meredith Grey. She knew that she was about to change Meredith's life.

Knocking on Meredith's door, she took a step in, "We need a bone marrow sample." Meredith frowned, looking at Bailey. She knew that bone marrow samples typically meant that something bad was wrong with her.

"Dr. Bailey," Meredith groaned, feeling her heart sink deeper into her chest, "Can you please tell me whats wrong?"

Bailey grimaced; she didn't know how to break the news to Meredith. She was hoping that Meredith would have some support before having to go through this process.

"Meredith," Bailey cleared her voice, "When we did all of these tests...we found three major concerns." Bailey felt the need to cry. The five residents that she had been in charge of during their intern year were like children to her. She firmly believed that she had to protect them from the evils of the world.

"And...?" Meredith's voice quivered nervously. The tone of Bailey's voice was not reassuring.

"Well, for one," Bailey began, "You're...you're pregnant."

I'm on my knees
Only memories
I left for me to hold.
Don't know how, but I'll get by
Slowly pull myself together.
I'll get through this

Meredith closed her eyes tightly, she figured that no better news was to come, "What else?"

"Meredith you...you have..." Bailey choked on her words, grabbing Meredith's frail hand, "You have acute lymphoblastic leukemia."

There's no escape
So keep me safe
This feels so unreal.

Meredith felt her eyes grow wide, but shut them instantly. The words were sinking in. It was her death sentence, she didn't have nine lives. She wasn't invincible, she wasn't stressed...she was dying, "Theres a but, isn't there?" She was dying, and she was bearing a child. Life and death.

Nothing comes easily
Fill this empty space
Nothing is like it seems
Turn my grief to grace.

Bailey continued to hold Meredith's hand, afraid to tell her the last piece of news, "You have a rare side effect...you, you have a lesion on your brain. Specifically on your occipital nerve...you need surgery Meredith, I..." Bailey felt a tear fall down her cheek.

"Can you get...Cristina?" Meredith heaved, trying hard not to cry. Her life was changing right before her eyes; she was dying, but housing a new life.

"Yes," Bailey blinked, "Dr. Patterson, the doctor who I've assigned to your surgery will come in to talk to you later. I assume that you don't want McDreamy in your brain, much less knowing about the surgery."

"You know me well," Meredith attempted to smile; but the attempt obviously failed.

I feel the cold
Loneliness unfold
From another world
Come what may
I won't fade away, but I know I might change.


"Meredith?" Cristina whispered, walking into her friend's hospital room, looking at the I.V's that Meredith was hooked up to, "Meredith, what the hell are you doing in a hospital bed...whats wrong?" Cristina instantly panicked, but didn't show it on her face. She had noticed that Meredith was paler recently, and she hardly ever wanted to get a drink after work.

Meredith finally felt the tears fall down her cheeks. Cristina watched her friend begin to cry and hurried over to her side, wrapping her arms around her person, "Oh, Mer...what's wrong?"

"I...I'm pregnant," Meredith sobbed, causing Cristina to frown, "But..I'm...I have...acute, acute lympho...lymphoblastic leukemia."

Cristina's eyes grew wide, wider than Meredith would have liked. It took a moment for the words to sink in, "Oh, Mer..." Cristina, completely leaving her stony, cold persona behind her, instinctively leaned forward and wrapped her arms around Meredith, "You're a fighter Mer, you'll get through this."

Meredith turned her head the other direction as a tear trickled down her cheek, "I'm not so sure."


"Dr. Bailey!" Derek yelled, causing Miranda to turn around with a ferocious look on her face, "I have a right to know what you just told Meredith. Whatever happened happened in my OR, you have to tell me!"

"I don't have to do anything, Dr. Shepherd," Bailey smirked, holding Meredith's chart firmly in her arms, "As far as I know, you and Meredith have no relationship besides a professional one. Hey, as far as I know you aren't even speaking, so no Dr. Shepherd, I cannot tell you what is happening with Meredith. Stay away from her!"

Derek wasn't thinking right; he had to see Meredith. Before he could even move from where he was standing, Rose came up besides him, linking her arm with his, "Hey stranger."

"Hey," Derek said gruffly, not even looking Rose's direction. He wanted to know, better yet he needed to know what was going on with Meredith.

"So..." Rose began softly, "What happened with Dr. Grey in surgery today?" Derek turned his head towards Rose and unlinked arms with her.

"I don't know, and I'd appreciate if you didn't talk about Meredith." Derek wasn't trying to be the bad guy, he wasn't trying to be an asshole, but when Meredith was in danger, he always felt the intense need to save her.

"Derek," Rose began, "I know that I'm the rebound chick. I don't think you want to know anything about me. I won't hold it against you, but you are so in love with Meredith Grey its sickening. I know that you are ready to advance your relationship with her, but Derek...you obviously want to be with her, so I'm letting you go...no guilt. We can even still be friends."

"Rose..." Derek's voice was quivering, "She'll never take me back after the things I said to her."

"Derek," she rolled her eyes, "You obviously haven't seen the way she looks at you."


"Hello, Dr. Grey," Dr. Patterson walked into the hospital room, Meredith was talking to Cristina quietly and Bailey was changing the fluids in her IV, "I know that you've had a few bombs dropped on you today, but I'm the doctor who will be performing your surgery."

"Hi," Meredith squeaked, nothing had hit her yet and luckily no one else had found out she was in the hospital, excluding Derek, who surprisingly hadn't come to bug her yet.

"I scheduled your surgery for two days from now," he explained, "We need to remove the lesion so we can focus on treating your bone marrow. But later today, we still need a bone marrow sample...meaning we will have to give you a lumbar puncture, which, as you know, is a very uncomfortable procedure."

"When are we going to do that?" Meredith asked, looking at Cristina, "Can I have someone there with me...?"

"I was thinking that we could do that now, so you can rest up for two days from now. I can explain to you the details of that particular surgery later, but we also have to be careful of your pregnancy." Meredith flinched at the words that came out of the doctor's mouth.

"I'm not going to be able to hide this forever, am I?" Meredith sighed, looking at Bailey, "I'm going to have to tell everyone sooner than later, aren't I?"


Addison Montgomery sat at her desk at the Oceanside Wellness Group in Los Angeles, finishing charting some of her patients from the past week, when the phone rang.

"Hello this is Dr. Montgomery, how may I help you?" she answered professionally, not bothering to look at the number.

"Addison?" Bailey's voice was shaking, the day had not turned out how she had expected, "This is Miranda Bailey, from Seattle Grace."

"Well hey Miranda," Addison smiled, taking off her glasses and leaning back in her chair, smiling as Pete walked by her door, "What are you up to? I haven't talked to you in a while!"

"Well, I wish I was calling about something better," Miranda sighed, "But I need a consult."

"Mir -" Addison began, but was instantly cut off.

"Its for Meredith Grey...she was just diagnosed with cancer, a few weeks after she broke up with Derek, and we also discovered that she was pregnant."

"I...wow, um...wow," Addison was shocked, she suddenly sat up a little straighter in her chair, "I've been waiting for a reason to come back, I think you just gave me my reason."

"Well," Bailey continued, "Shes having surgery in two days and we could really use you here...we could..."

"Miranda," Addison cleared her voice, trying not to sound too surprised by the news, "You don't have to say anymore, I'm on my way."


Somehow, Meredith had been wheeled into another room without being noticed by any of her other friends. She knew that plenty of gossiping nurses had noticed her, so she figured they would find out soon anyways.

"As you know," the doctor explained, "This is going to be uncomfortable, I gave you medication to help with the pain but you will probably feel a lot of pressure on your spine." Meredith frowned, looking at Cristina. One lone tear wandered down her face.

"You know," Cristina began, "You held your hand on an unexploded bomb in a body cavity. You drowned in the Elliot Bay. Obviously, Mer, a little leukemia isn't going to stop you from doing your thing."

Meredith laughed, "Thanks Cristina." As soon as the two settled down, she began to feel the pressure of the needle on her spine and grabbed Cristina's hand, squeezing it for dear life.

"Thanks for being here," Meredith looked up at Cristina, feeling another tear coming down her face as the needle moved around in her spine, "You'll always be my person."


Derek walked down the halls of Seattle Grace, inwardly trying to focus on his patients instead of Meredith. It was in that moment that the door swung open to one of the procedure rooms, the room where Meredith was getting her bone marrow extracted for a sample. His jaw dropped, lumbar punctures never meant anything good. He took in her face, her eyes were wet with tears.

Hesitating for a moment, Derek decided to walk into the room, but it turned into a run, "Meredith!"


The updates more than likely won't be this frequent, but thanks for the reviews! It means a lot.