Chapter One:
Artemis sat at the kitchen table reading the business section of the Irish Times when his cell phone rang. Caller ID read Minerva Paradizzo. Artemis debated on whether or not he should pick up the phone when Butler walked into the room. He might not be employed by the Fowls now but he still swung by once in a while to make sure things were okay at Fowl Manor.
"You can't keep avoiding her forever," the large ex-bodyguard said. Artemis treated him to one of his infamous vampire grins. It said, 'I-bet-I-can'.
"Would you like to place money on that, old friend?"
"You're acting unbelievably childish," remarked Butler. "Behavior that doesn't suit you, might I add."
"I believe that when a person is dumped, they are allowed a period to sulk about it, am I correct?"
"Tell the truth, Artemis. You were relieved when Minerva dumped you, right?"
"That may be the case, but still…" Artemis took a sip of orange juice. "I'd like to enjoy the privileges that come with being dumped, thank you. If it'll make you feel any better, I'll call Minerva later and set up a lunch date to talk things out…at her expense of course."
"You're incorrigible, Artemis," said Butler with a sigh. "Where's your family?"
"On a trip," spat Artemis. "To Disneyland. I'm afraid that Myles and Beckett are nothing like me."
"Thank goodness," said Butler under his breath. Artemis pretended he hadn't heard.
Butler picked up the news section of the newspaper and scanned the front page story. "Have you heard about the Satanist?"
"Who hasn't?" returned Artemis without even looking up his section of the paper.
"'Missing organs, limbs and bones, oh my,'" read Butler. "For months, officials worldwide have been finding the ransacked bodies of wanted criminals and corrupt politicians. The scene around the body is always gruesome and seemingly straight from a horror flick. Blood and guts spewed all over, pentagrams and other ritualistic diagrams have been found at the crime scene. People are beginning to call this mystery murderer, the Satanist…"
"Please," said Artemis. "Some people haven't had breakfast yet."
"Are you going to look into it? The case I mean."
"Why should I? I have plenty on my plate already."
Artemis reached for a muffin and looked up into the smiling face of his subterranean friend, Holly Short.
"Hi, Holly," said Artemis absent mindedly, his mind focused on the banana-nut muffin he was reaching for. Then words began to register in his oversized brain and he nearly dropped his muffin.
"Hi, Mudboy," said Holly smugly.
"How did you…?"
"When your servant was welcoming in Butler, he said 'Come in' which is a general invitation since there were no names attached to it. How you doing, Butler?"
Butler smiled at Holly and Holly couldn't help but notice how the skin crinkled around his mouth and eyes as he smiled. Holly looked at the paper spread out on the table in front of Butler.
"So you call him the Satanist up here?" she asked.
"What do you mean?" asked Artemis.
"It seems that the Satanist's reach stretches all the way into Haven. Ark Sool was found dead in his flat this morning. The LEP just contacted me. Since I just happened to be flying over Ireland, I decided to swing by here and get your opinion on the case. You have been working on it, haven't you?"
"No," admitted Artemis. "Why does everyone think I've been working on this case? You do realize that there are two genii in this world?"
"I don't know," said Holly slowly. "Supernatural things seem straight up your alley."
"Minerva kidnapped a demon," countered Artemis. "If anything, this would be more her thing than mine."
Holly picked up a cinnamon muffin and nibbled at it as she watched Artemis. Her blue eye twinkled with amusement while her brown one twinkled mischievously. "You kidnapped me, once."
"About that…"
"Water under the bridge," interrupted Holly. "Well, if you haven't been working on it, I would suggest you get to work on it now."
"Right," said Artemis, still uncomfortable from Holly's prior statement.
"And have you started talking to Minerva, yet?" asked Holly.
"No," said Artemis with a grin.
"Why not?"
"She's left thirty messages on my cell phone, forty on my answering machine in my room, thirty-seven emails and an 'I'm-Sorry' cake on my doorstep, and you're asking me why? By the by, the cake was the sweetest thing I have ever had the pleasure to taste."
"I think your eye is beginning to affect him, Holly," said Butler.
"It does sound like something I would do, doesn't it?" Holly was grinning along with Butler.
"Now you would have had that person buy you lunch," said Artemis.
"As I recall…" began Butler.
"You have to get back to work," finished Artemis as he shot a glare in Butler's direction. Butler just chuckled.
"You're right," said Holly. She hopped off her seat and onto the floor. "I have to catch my 2:45 shuttle back to Haven. Catch you on the communicator, Artemis. Bye Butler."
Holly left. Artemis picked up the article Butler had been reading and scanned through it. Another psychopath Artemis had to catch. Nothing new there.
So what do you think? R&R if you want the next chapter!
