AN: This is a longer chapter, i promise (it's eren's aptitude test! its prob shitty but i dont care im just trying to finish this and will try to edit later!)
im trying to write this to resemble the book as closely as possible
sorry if my pacing's weird or whatever, i'm pretty bad at this and am trying to improve ;w;
all comments/constructive criticism appreciated

i love all of you

Chapter Two

The Abnegation table is silent, our heads bowed in an attempt to help the rest of the room forget we exist. No one moves or makes any noise, save for the occasional rustling of clothes as another sixteen-year-old's name is called. I want to talk to my sister, to ask her how she's feeling, but I can't break the silence. It would be wrong. I don't know why, but it would. We're supposed to forget ourselves and help everyone else forget us, too. To speak would be to draw attention to myself. I've been living in Abnegation for sixteen years – long enough for at least some of these behaviors to already be ingrained in me.

While many of the others from my faction are perfectly content with sitting quietly, I am a bundle of nervous energy. My leg jiggles under the table as I try to discreetly cast glances around the room. There's the sound of light laughter and clapping from across the room, where a table of yellow and red clad Amity sit clustered in small groups, chatting and giggling about something or other. I hear the sounds of hands being slapped on the wooden table behind me accompanied by the sound of cards being shuffled and raucous laughter as someone tells a bawdy joke. Dauntless. The faction I'm seriously considering devoting the rest of my life to.

The Erudite table is quiet, but not silent like ours. Almost everyone there has a book of some sort propped open in front of them, resting on hands or on the table. Those who don't engage in soft discussion, with participants pausing to contemplate a new idea or nod in acknowledgment at a particularly strong point. The Candor, dressed in black and white, sit in smaller groups than the Amity, though they are almost as lively. I can hear them arguing, though it's in a friendly tone. Debating, perhaps? A lot of the Candor boys in my Faction History class did that. I don't entirely understand the appeal.

Mikasa's name is called. If she's feeling anxious it doesn't show on her face. She stands and strides purposefully toward the door with the other nine test takers. She has no reason to be feeling guilt or nervousness. She and I both know she has a place in Abnegation with our parents. I'm not entirely sure I have a place at all, and that scares me. I don't want to leave my mom and sad. My hands ball into fists at my sides. I'm a coward.

I've run through this so many times in my head already over this past week. I've been carefully considering each faction and what it represents, then comparing that to the few notable qualities I know I possess. Bravery. No, I'm just a reckless idiot most of the time. I never think before I act. Honesty. Not honesty, but rudeness. Anger. Intelligence? Ha, as if. Jean said you're too dumb to find your way out of a paper bag. Kindness? Jean deserved the split lip he got from me, just like I sort of deserved that bloody nose he gave me in return. Selflessness. I would stay in Abnegation for my family, even though I know it's not really where I belong. Wouldn't I? Every time I even start to think about the impact tomorrow's choice will have on the rest of my life, my brain starts to shut down. The impending Choosing Ceremony is certainly not helping things.

Mikasa returns, silently taking her seat beside me, face impassive as always. She doesn't acknowledge me or offer any words of comfort or reassurance. She is not allowed to tell me her results, just like I am not allowed to ask for them.

An Amity volunteer steps into the room and begins listing off the next ten names. Two Candor, two Amity, two Erudite, two Dauntless. Then, "From Abnegation: Marlowe Freudenberg and Eren Jaeger."

I'm standing before I've even fully registered the fact that my name has been called. I feel a tightness in my chest as I begin the excruciatingly slow walk to the exit. Marlowe walks along beside me, his air of calm never faltering. Beside him I can only imagine how terrified I must seem to anyone bothering to pay any attention to us. For once I am grateful that we are so forgettable.

Once I'm finally outside the cafeteria, I find myself faced with a row of ten rooms on a wall of mirrors. Great. Now I can see exactly how pathetic I look right now. I am directed to the room at the far end of the hall. Inside, a petite Dauntless woman with red hair greets me. She has a soft-looking face set in a friendly expression. She doesn't seem at all intimidating, but I know she's got to be tough to survive in her faction. She has large green eyes and wears a maroon shirt with a black jacket and jeans.

She has a small tattoo of two wings, one white and one black, overlapping on her wrist.

"Hello, I'm Petra," she greets me, smiling and ushering me along to a reclined chair in the center of the room. There's a machine next to it, which she takes her place behind. "Now, if you'll just relax. This won't hurt a bit, Eren."

I sit. It feels strange to lean back this far in a chair, but I do as she says. I close my eyes in an attempt to block out the bright fluorescent light shining down on me and to avoid looking at my reflection in the mirror on the ceiling. Petra begins attaching electrodes to me. There's a slight pressure as she attaches a wire to it. I can hear her attaching another one to herself. She tugs lightly on the wire, pulling it in the direction of the machine next to me.

"Here," she says as she holds a small vial of clear liquid out to me. "I need you to drink this so we can begin."

I want to ask what it is she's offering me, but I figure it won't make things any better so I just reach out and grab it, then swallow down the contents in one fluid motion. I must look a lot braver than I feel, because Petra smiles at me in the half second before my eyes shut.

In the blink of an eye – literally – I've been transported back to the cafeteria. For a split second, I wonder if I passed out from nervousness in the exam room – embarrassing – and they had to carry me back to Mikasa. Then I notice that the room is completely empty, save the tables, upon one of which is placed a large, glistening knife and a sizable piece of cheese.

"Choose," says a bleak voice from somewhere in my head. At first I thought I had imagined it, but then it repeated itself. "Choose."

"I... what will I need this for?"

"Choose!"

The yell startles me. I reach out my hands and grab both the cheese and the knife.

"Cheater," the voice huffs. "You were supposed to choose."

There's a creaking noise from behind me as the door opens. I spin around, expecting the source of the voice, but instead I find... a dog? It sniffs the air, catching my scent, then drops itself lower to the ground as its lips curl back in a vicious snarl. I'm frozen in place. I don't want to move for fear of provoking it further. I clench the handle of the knife tight in my hand. My fingers dig into the cheese. I don't want to fight the dog. I don't want to hurt it, but I also don't want it to hurt me. I tear off a small piece of cheese and fling it at the dog. It hits the animal on the nose, startling it. It growls deep in its throat. I am just now noticing how sharp its teeth look, and I am terrified.

Just then, I remember something Mikasa once told me about meeting new dogs. Don't look them in the eye and don't face them directly. Those are signs of aggression. I turn my face and then my body, watching the dog out of the corner of my eye as I move slowly, so slowly. The dog's growling begins to subside and it moves itself out of the crouch. It considers me for a moment, then trots over to me and begins nosing at my hand that's holding the cheese. It whines a little, so I drop a piece.

The dog barely sniffs it before scarfing it down and staring up at me. It sits and whines again. Suddenly, its ears perk up.

"Puppy!" cries the small girl who has materialized on the other side of the room. When did she get there? She smiles and runs toward me.

"Hey, don't-"

But it's too late. The dog bounds off, teeth bared as it charges for the girl. I don't have time to think, so I don't. Knife in hand, I leap after it, fully prepared to kill to save this child.

Just as the knife is about to puncture flesh, the dog and the girl disappear. I blink and I'm back in the testing room. Is it over? I turn to look for Petra, but she's not there. I pull the electrodes off me and swing my legs off the side of the chair. I poke my head out into the hallway... only it's not a hallway anymore. Instead, it's... the inside of a bus? It's incredibly crowded. I don't see any free seats, so I just stand.

"Do you know this guy?" I turn to face a man sitting next to me. His hands are extremely scarred and the flesh seems as though it's been melted. I can't see his face over the newspaper he's holding, but his finger taps the picture on the front under the headline, "Brutal Murderer Finally Apprehended!"

I glance at the picture of the man. There's a twinge of recognition in my brain. I know this guy... but from where? I see the man's hand clench the newspaper even tighter. I can tell he's angry. I feel in my gut that telling him is a bad idea. Nothing good will come of me telling this man what I know.

"Well, do you?" he asks again, voice impatient and angry.

"No. No, I have no idea who that is," I say, trying to imitate Mikasa's voice, trying to sound sure of myself and not let my voice waver.

"You're lying! Liar!"

I've always been a terrible liar.

"No!"

He's dropped the paper. I can see his face – it's almost exactly like his hands. Scarred, melted, burned.

"I can see it in your face!"

"What are you even talking about?"

"If you know him... You could save me!" he growls. "This could save me!"

"Dude, I said I don't know him! Chill out!"

Then everything is gone.