Like-Omg-Like-Seddie here. How's life treatin' ya? Good? Real good? Good!
How's the story treatin' ya? Good? Real good? Bad? What? Really bad? Wha-how
could this be-WHAT'S GOING ON HERE!

We do not own iCarly :P

Carly and Sam were best friends. Sam, well she was sort of a trouble maker.
Most of the time, she would get herself in a deep load of crap, but Carly, her
reluctant best friend and sometimes hero, would usually swoop in and sweet
talk whoever Sam had pissed off this time.

Carly had done just that for Sam that day actually. Unfortunately, Ms. Briggs,
a really bitter woman with something stuck way far up her butt and pointy
boobs, forced her and Sam to run the auditions for the talent show on
Saturday, due to Sam's recent shenanigans.

"Whoa whoa, hold on there! I can't Saturday! I have a nail appointment?" Carly
whined loudly to Ms. Briggs and Mr. Franklin. Sam rolled her eyes at the
extreme and sickening girlishness that was unfolding in front of her.

"We'll do it," She said simply, and dragged Carly out of Mr. Franklin's
office.

"What? Why did you do that?" Carly yelled at her when they were in the Ridgway
hallway. Sam sighed and rolled her eyes again.

"Well," She said looking at Carly. "Would you rather me go back and get us 4
months of after school detention?"

Carly's eyes grew wide and she gulped. Then she slowly shook her head, her
dark locks swaying back and forth.

"I didn't think so," Sam stated and they walked to their lockers. "So, this
talent show thing. Maybe it won't be that bad?"

"Yeah. And maybe Spencer will get a job that actually pays a steady salary,"
Carly told Sam sarcastically. Sam laughed and shook her head. She knew Carly
was right. Holding auditions on a Saturday was going to suck. Badly.

But hey, maybe if she was lucky, there would be a total hottie there ... Yeah
not so much.

Okay. Life was officially jank.

Carly

So, I wake up Saturday morning, take a quick shower and open my closet. Then I
realize: Talent show auditions. Who needs to get dressed up? So I grab the
first pair of sweats I find and I throw on my 3Oh!3 t-shirt and I walk to
Sam's house.

This is sort of weird for me. I've never really left the house looking so
casual without there being an occasion like going to the gym, and even then I
usually dress to impress. But in defiance to the torture of watching no-talent
losers, who's friends and family have lied to them for years telling them they
in fact do have talent and that their special, embarrass themselves for 3
hours.

That, in fact, was not how Carly planned on spending her free time. But,
because of her best friends stupidity, and her extreme stupidity for trying to
take the blame for Sam's stupidity, she had no choice.

Hmmm, does it add dramatic affect to talk about myself in 3rd person?

When Sam runs out the door, looking a lot more put together then I do, which
is def a first, her mom starts her car and we leave for Ridgway. At first,
we're locked out, and I hear the hallelujah chorus sing, but then the janitor
opens the door and the music stops.

I walked into the auditorium gloomily, feeling like no one should mess with me
because I might go off at any second. And at first, it goes totally as
expected. A bunch of no talent losers doing nothing but proving to us that
they have no talent.

Then, a light shines at the end of the talentless tunnel, and a girl plays the
trumpet while on her pogo stick and the faint sound of the hallelujah chorus
starts to pick up again.

"Dude, you're awesome!" Sam said to her when she was finished. They high five
and the girl beams like crazy.

"And I love your top!" I add, which starts a whole new conversation about how
she searched all over the city for a store that held that shirt and how when
she went, she had to have it specially ordered and shipped to the store so she
could pick it up. It was a pretty amazing story.

I didn't ask, sure. But it was still pretty cool. I've never known someone so
dedicated to fashion like that. It was kind of inspiring.

"Alright, see you later! NEXT!" I screamed. Sure, she had great fashion sense
but I really wanted to get this over with.

There's a couple more freaks who really just need to go find a big rock and
die under it, but there's a guy who talks backwards, which is pretty cool
because he does it super fast. He was kind of cute too...

Then there's the kid I hate. Simon. No not the ever so 'optomistic' but
lovable judge of American Idol. Simon, the ever so disgusting but hatable kid
who squirts milk out of his eyes.

Yes. You heard me right. Squirts.

Um, I'm sorry, can someone please tell this kid that milk is meant to DRINK
and not to SQUIRT FROM YOUR FREAKIN' EYES?

But of course, Sam adores him and says he's in. Ugh. Gross. But who cares?
It's not like I'm going to show up for the talent show anyway.

After about an hour, we screamed next. But no one walked in. Which is why me
and Sam jumped up and down in delight and did an entire happy dance that was
surprisingly in sync with the other although we never practiced.

That's just the level of BestFriendatude we're on, me and Sam.

We pack up our stuff and start to leave, going, "Uh huh, Oh yeah, Uh huh,
That's right, We're done, Oh yeah."

And then he had to ruin it.

He burst through the door with a guitar case and four guys follow. I've got my
eye on him at first, because well, he's pretty good looking. He's got that
I-Don't-Care-What-Anyone-Thinks-Of-Me-Because-I'm-A-Poor-And-Tortured-Soul-Who-Tries-To-Act-Tough-To-Hide-My-True-Feelings
grunge look. And it really suited him.

So when they all ran in panting and sweating and telling us to 'wait don't go'
in between breaths, my scowl starts to morph into a smirk.

"Um, hi there, I'm Carly," I say confidentially walking up to him and shaking
his hand. I flip my hair in hopes he will notice the lushness, then remember
that I didn't brush it in the morning, so it's a mess. He shakes my hand, but
barely even looks at me. When Sam introduces herself, I notice that he smiles
at her a little bit more meaningfully then how he smiled at me.

And what are the odds: Sam did her hair that day.

"Uh, I'm Freddie, but most people call me F-Deezy," He said, still smiling at
her. Sam blushed. Really? Did Sam just blush?

"Really?" I ask suspiciously. That's not exactly the kind of name I expected
for a guy like him. You know, lame.

"No," He said and started laughing. I looked at Sam as she laughed
hysterically. Why was she laughing so hard? It wasn't even funny! "That was a
joke. Well, my name is Freddie, but they call me Fred."

"And who would they be?" Sam asked him flirtily. Ugh. It was just disgusting.
You are so lucky you didn't see it.

Freddie or Fred or F-Deezy or whatever looks back at his friends who are
holding a variety of instruments, and grins.

"I guess those knuckle-heads," He said playfully. Aww how cute. Psyche.

"Well, I'm sorry Fred but auditions are over. We have places to be," I tell
him, making an effort to say it extra rudely. If he notices, he doesn't let
on.

"Okay, I understand you completely! But if you could just listen to this one
song I swear-"

"She's right. Letting you go wouldn't be fair to all the other people who we
just turned away." I heard Sam say. Well it's about time she was on my side. I
nod my head in agreement and raise an eyebrow at Freddie that says Get out! He
doesn't get the message.

"Okay, please just one song! Not even a song! A chorus! I'll sing you the
chorus of a song!" He begs pathetically. Oh goodness. We did not have time for
this.

"Look, kid. We're-"

"Just ... please..."

"-On a tight schedule and like Sam said-"

"Fine."

I looked around to see what imbecile said such a thing. I come to realize it's
Sam. I look at her, flabbergasted. But she just stares at Freddie's foolish
grin as he slowly walks backwards and his, what apparently was his 'band' unstrapped and unzipped and opened up all their instruments. He
then walked up to the microphone and it made a screeching sound. One of his
friends tuned his guitar and a kid who brought about 3 drums with him, not
including the kick drum, tried to place them in area's on the floor that would
be easiest for him to reach.

"!, 2, 3, 4..." Said the drummer boy, and on the filth beat, or the first
beat, which ever one you want to call it, they started to play.

Now I don't know about Sam, but I instantly recognized the song. They played
the chorus of Don't Stop Believing and Fred/Freddie/F-Deezy sang his little
good looking heart out.

"Don't stop!" He finished, and again, I don't know about Sam, but I was
impressed. But they were jank for coming in late and making us stay longer AND
for not even giving me the time of day and instead giving it to, of all
people, Sam?

"Well, that was really ... cute but I'm sorry, audition time is ov-" I started
to give them the boot when Sam interrupts me.

"Wow, you guys are great! I love your voice, it's amazing!" She fawned. I just
looked at her, checking if she wasn't under the influence or something. She
wasn't. Freddie/Fred/F-Deezy/Loser thanks her every times he compliments her
and his band mates exchange exited glances for no apparent reason and I'm
steaming.

"So, um, we're not really sure right now about the list of people, but maybe
you should give me your number and I'll ... we'll call you and let you know."
Freddie/Fred/F-Deezy shrugged like an idiot and pulled out a pen and started
to write it on Sams arm. She smiled at him and never took her eyes off his.

*Sticks finger in mouth and makes puking noise*

"Um, yeah Sam, can I talk to you for a second?" I asked her finally. She was
going to tell me what was up with her, and why she was all up in his grill.

"So, buddy, since when have we been calling people to tell them their in the
talent show?" I wanted to know once we distanced ourselves from them, even
though I already did. She smiled and got closer to me so the guys wouldn't
hear.

"Since now. I mean, look at him!" We both turn out bodies to see him
animatedly explaining something to his friends. He must have said a joke
because they erupt in laughter. "He's gorgeous. And I think he might like
me,"

"Um, I don't think he does..." I said not knowing what else to say. She looked
at me with such a hurt expression it almost made me feel bad.

"You ... don't?" She asks all sad like. I roll my eyes and sigh.

"Well, I just think you're better then that. I mean, he looks like the rebel
type to me," I told her, starting to hatch my plan.

"Exactly! That's why he seems perfect for me!" She says excitedly. I stop her
with my finger.

"But that's just it. Opposites attract. You can't go out with a rebel because
you are a rebel. What you need to do is look for a boyfriend in the last place
you would usually look."

" ... In the trash can?" She said dumbly. I rolled my eyes playfully.

"No, silly! On a sports team! Come on now!" She nodded as if she was trying to
understand me. I nodded with her waiting for it all to gel.

"Okay. So, I guess I'll keep away from him," She says sounding extremely
upset. Oh well. She'll get over it when I find her a nice boyfriend from the
football team.

What?

Why are you looking at me like that?

If I can't have him, she can't have him.

That's the level of BestFriendatude we're in.

Notice- Chapter 1 up now , I thought it was Epic but we also want to hear what you think , So please Review