NOTE: Well, you wanted it, you got it. Read at your own risk.
Breakfast was quiet. Austria sat in between the two nations as they ate away from each other, backs fully turned despite having their morning meal on one table. This was going to be quite a day.
"Hey," Germany called. "I was wondering where you went off to last night."
"Oh, hey, West!" Prussia greeted quite terribly. "Nothing! Nothing at all. Nope, went to the bar last night." He forced out a laugh. "Had too much to drink and probably slept in an alley. Good thing I didn't get mugged. Well, it looks like Italy's here. You better start training now, West. I'll see you later!" And with that, he hastened his pace.
"Hm, I wonder what's gotten into him."
"Hey, Germany!" Italy called. "We're ready now."
"Probably the beer," he muttered before turning to his allies. "Alright, today's training will consist of…"
"So, would you mind telling me what happened last night?"
Hungary couldn't answer that. She couldn't even move. She stood there in her old maid gown holding the broom as stiffly as her strength could allow. It's been several decades since her divorce with Austria but cleaning his house like she used to do was what she could think of to clear her mind. The hangover was still there.
"I… don't recall…" she replied. It wasn't the whole truth. It wasn't even a whole lie.
"It's pretty odd that I almost stumbled on a beer bottle on my way to the guest room."
"Uh…"
"Hungary?"
She couldn't even face him. Damn that Prussia! If only she hadn't done whatever she did last night, then she probably wouldn't have to face this crisis. If only she didn't get drunk...
"I feel so unawesome today," he moped, crouching in his vast archive of diaries and journals. The gloomy atmosphere matched the mixed emotions he had right now. "This sucks…"
Finding out that Hungary was... dickless... had not been much of a positive experience. Finding Hungary in a bush and seeing her chest half-exposed was worse. This morning just took the cake. Why did she have to be a girl anyway? Things would've probably been much better if Hungary was a boy. Then again, things always turned out differently and for the better. In this case, it was for the better of both.
"Uh, bruder, someone is here to see you."
"GAH! HOW DID YOU FIND OUT ABOUT THIS PLACE!"
"I'm your brother, remember?" With that, Germany left the door slightly ajar.
"Who is it?"
"I'm guessing it's Hungary. Strange, she's wearing a hood over her head. She doesn't usually do that."
Prussia went rigid. "Oh, I see. It's Hungary. Well, you can go back to your training now." Shooing him away turned out to have the opposite effect as his younger brother proceeded into the dark library. "We decided to take a break. Italy ran off as usual and Japan is still getting accustomed to the new regiment."
"Is that so? Right, so what brings you here?"
"Bruder, you seem off today." Germany's hands were on his hips.
"Come on, West! I had too much to drink last night. You should be looking for Italy."
"I caught him running inside. I have a good bet that he's in here somewhere."
"Okay, so you go look for him while I go see Hungary." Prussia tapped the younger nation and rushed to the antechamber. Hungary stood outside the door, head bowed and a cloak draped over her upper body. It was pretty obvious that their secret didn't hold out well at Austria's.
Already, they sealed the living room. "Well?"
"Austria wants to know."
"Aside from the obvious, verdammt!"
Hungary yanked his ear.
"WHAT!"
"We have to."
"But you can't be! It's impossible! You can't be pregnant!"
"Who's pregnant?" Germany asked dragging a dizzy Italy by the collar.
There were two couches that sat opposite each other in the living room. They were divided by a round table. On most days, that table served as the holder of coffee for conferences and diplomatic meetings. However, for today, it became the buffer for the tension caused by the two opposite sides.
On one, Hungary and Prussia, bowing their heads and timid with shame like a pair of teenagers caught in the act. The disappointed parents were Germany (pinching the bridge of his nose in the manner that he is all too accustomed with) and Austria (sipping at his tea as though nothing important has happened). Italy was sleeping on the floor in the corner of the room (dreaming of cats and dogs dancing around the world).
Austria cleared his throat. "Well, it is pretty clear what you two were up to last night."
"Ja," Germany huffed. "You both had too much to drink."
"The blankets and the bed sheets have traces of the 'evidence.'"
"And the bar patrons clearly remember seeing two individuals 'putting on a spectacular show' the previous evening."
"So, who among you would do the explaining?"
Prussia was mustered up. He began with his cheeky smile. "Hey, ease up, guys! You know me, West. I'm not much of an arsch, Austria. But to be honest with you, I really don't remember what happened last night. It's still all a haze." He was felled by Germany's hard right.
"You're my brother! You have just as good tolerance to alcohol as I do, dummkopf!"
Hungary was automatically at his defense. "Please! I, too, don't remember much about the affair." The look in her eyes convinced Austria that she was telling the truth. Why had he not seen that earlier this morning when he interrogated her? Oh, that's right. The "interrogation" was just a questionnaire not imposing enough to make her bring up her head to face him.
"You can't be serious, Hungary?" Germany asked.
She simply nodded noticing Austria's hand on Germany's shoulder. "Let's retrace the steps, shall we?"
He grunted. Come to think of it, if Prussia was too drunk to have full control of what he was doing, then it would mean that he had downed more beers than his sobriety could handle. He did that a lot—being the ass that he usually was. But he was still his brother. And because he knew Hungary long enough to know that she was sincere in her claim, then there would be no more use to finding more about the affair.
Germany sat back down. "Are you sure you're pregnant?"
"I'm not entirely sure. It's just a probability."
"We have to be absolutely certain that you are carrying a baby," Austria explained. "so we would know what to do next."
"Now the question is," Germany began, tapping his finger on his temple, "how are we going to know for sure that you are pregnant?"
"Oui! Perhaps moi could help?"
Even then, France still could not sharpen his espionage and reconnaissance skills.
It was quite a rarity having four nations visiting his office. It made it all the more difficult to explain how complicated this was what with two stern-faced countries staring down on him. This is not to mention the two seated nations ostensibly reeking with gloom and desperation.
"I don't know if it's good new or bad news. It's not at all difficult to explain but in your case, I wouldn't know if it would change the future in one way or another. I mean, considering the recent geopolitics and state of affairs, of course."
"What do you mean, doctor?"
He cleared his throat. "You're not having a baby."
"WHAT!"
The doctor held up a rather sophisticated diagram.
"Coitus Interruptus."
NOTE: Edited this. Now I can get back to work!
