Chapter 2

Carla Bailey was working in her lab.

The Tardis had provided her with everything she needed, including a bed and a reclining chair, both useful for running tests on Rebel as she continued to research a way to control his empathic receptor.

As she heard a tap on the door she looked up from a computer screen.

"Yes, Riley?"

"Rebel's been gone a long time. I'm not sure where he is."

"When did you last see him?"

"After we got rid of the creature. He jumped into a cab, I don't know where he was going. I came straight back here."

Carla switched off the screen and got up, as she stepped away from her desk Riley noticed she looked very fetching in her dark blue Victorian gown, but didn't bother to pay her a compliment, figuring that ought to be down to Rebel...

"Riley, why didn't you say something before?"

He shrugged.

"I went through to the kitchen, had something to eat, then I had a nap for half an hour..."

"What is it with you and food and sleeping?" she complained, "I told you not l to let him wander off!"

And she left the lab, joining him in the corridor.

"We'll have to go out and look for him."

"But he got into a carriage, Carla! He could be anywhere!"

She thought about it.

"Maybe not...where is he likely to go?"

He thought about it.

"Well, let me see... the entity has been banished, he's just saved world... So if he's not in a pub having a few beers and getting completely pissed up, I'd say it's a toss up between the local opium den or the nearest brothel..."

She stared at him in disbelief.

"Oh no," she said in alarm, "We definitely have to find him!"

And she began to walk off down the corridor towards the console room.

"You know what he's like, Carla," he called out as he hurried to join her, "He just wants to absorb an nice old time England experience..."

"Like catching an old time STI like syphilis?" she yelled back, "Not if I have anything to do with it!" And then she turned the corner, hurrying towards the console room.

Riley recalled his earlier conversation with Rebel and laughed.

"I think your balls are already in that jar, mate..." he said, and then he hurried on to catch up with Carla.


As Carla entered the console room she caught her breath, eyes wide at the sight of Rebel sprawled on the floor unconscious.

She fell to her knees and checked his airway, then turned him on his side.

"RILEY!" she yelled, and he ran into the console room.

"What?" he asked, and then he saw Rebel on the floor.

"What's happened?"

He stood over him anxiously as Carla examined the unconscious Time Lord.

She took his pulse, unbuttoned his shirt, placed her hands on his chest and felt the beating of his twin hearts.

"Rebel?" she said, but he gave no response.

Then she sniffed his clothing and looked up at Riley.

"It's not an overdose...well, its certainly not blue, he doesn't smell like volcanic rock..."

Then her eyes hardened as she glared at him.

"You saw him last. Has he taken anything, Riley?"

"Why would I know -"

"HAS HE TAKEN ANYTHING?"

Now Carla looked scared.

"Please," she begged him, "Tell me, his life could depend on it!"

Riley shook his head.

"I swear, Carla – he was fine last time I saw him. He said he had some private business to deal with and he went off in a carriage..." he paused, staring at the creeping scarlet stain that was leaking from beneath him.

"He's bleeding!"

Carla wasted no time.

"Help me get him to the lab!" she said urgently.

Moments later Rebel was on the bed in the lab and his coat was off, then his waist coat, with every item of clothing she removed, Carla seemed to find the next one soaked with even more blood than the last.

"What the hell?" she said in shocked voice as Rebel lay on his side and she ran her hand cautiously down the back of his blood soaked shirt.

"I can't move him," she said, "I don't know how bad it is."

And she brought over a trolley of instruments, grabbed a pair of scissors and began to cut away his shirt. As she removed the material and exposed his back, she looked down at the welts and deep slashes and swollen bruising that covered his body and put her hand to her mouth as she drew in a breath and tried to hold back from crying.

"Oh God..." she said in a hushed voice, "What's happened to him?"

"Well it doesn't look like an accident," Riley said, "So work it out. Those are deliberate wounds, most likely left by some kind of a whip. That is the kind of stuff that is consensual, those wounds on his back...he's been for a session, I think...a pretty intense one by the look of it..."

Then he fell silent, noticing tears in Carla's eyes.

"He paid for this?" she exclaimed in horror.

"I was trying to be tactful about it," Riley said, "But I've just remembered I'm not very good at that...yes, I'd say he did pay for it. You know what he's like, that empathic receptor seeks it out. He needed some serious pain. Looks like he got it...is he going to be okay?"

She wiped her eyes and nodded.

"His vital signs are all steady, I'd say he passed out due to the pain... I'll start cleaning him up. I think I can glue most of the wounds, there's one that needs stitching, I'll do that now while he's still out."

And as she shifted the trolley closer and then started to clean the blood from his back, she spoke again.

"That empathic receptor is dangerous. It's a mutation and its enlarging. That's why he's getting more extreme for seeking out pain. It's going to kill him in the end, one way or another, unless I can find a way to fix it."

"He told me you said that. I don't think he believes it."

"That's because he takes drugs to mask it, to block it off. But it doesn't stop it coming back. I'm working on a cybernetic implant that can turn the receptor down, but it's not ready yet..."

She threaded a surgical needle and Riley felt sick.

"But he's okay, I mean, okay for now? And I'm okay to leave the room?"

"I didn't say you had to stay."

Her reply had been hushed.

"I know that, but I'm his best mate and I worry -"

He drew in a sharp breath as the needle punctured flesh.

"I'll be outside," he said quickly, and left the lab.


A short while later the worst of the wounds had been stitched and dressed and the rest glued and covered with gauze and surgical tape.

Rebel was still on his side as he gave a faint groan and slowly opened his eyes. Pain throbbed through his body and he felt weak. His vision came into sharp focus and he saw he was on a bed in Carla's lab. He thought back and recalled the world turning black as he entered the Tardis.

"I hope I didn't hit my head on the console again."

"No," Carla said quietly, "You collapsed because of the pain. I take it this was a professional beating?"

He gave a weary sigh.

"Well... there was this whip, and I liked the look of it...sorry."

Pain registered on his face as he cautiously turned on to his back, but Carla was leaning over him with no trace of sympathy in her eyes.

"How many times have I told you not to give in to these urges? You'll kill yourself at this rate! Do you really want to do that? Do you want to put me through -" She broke off from her lecture, her words dissolving into tears.

"Don't cry over this," Rebel took hold of her hand as she wiped her eyes, "I'll be fine. A long sleep will help me to use my own abilities to repair some of the damage."

"But not all of it! You're too weak to achieve that! It's bad enough you take the blue mist to shut down the receptor – now you're feeding it? I told you that thing inside your head is a mutation – it's not a part of normal Time Lord biology! And it's getting bigger. I have to find a way to control it or eventually, it could kill you!"

He gave a sigh.

"I do see your point of view Carla, but I also see it as a consequence of a difficult regeneration. It's just a part of a slightly different kind of body. I'm not afraid of it."

She looked into his eyes.

"You're not afraid? Because it guides you towards pain and suffering, because it drives you to indulge in sado masochism?"

"This isn't the first time I've been injured during something I've paid for!"

"Injured to the point you collapsed and needed medical attention?"

Her question had caught him out.

"No," he admitted, "This is a first."

"Well don't let this happen again," she said quietly, "Because I – because it's not a good idea."

And then she drew her hand away from his grip.

"You get some rest," she told him, "Try and get some sleep, you need it."

And then she left the room and Rebel lay still, making no attempt to move as pain throbbed and reminded him just how far he had gone – too far this time, and he wasn't sure why, but he felt as if he owed Carla an apology...


"Is he okay?"

Carla walked back towards the console room, and even though she gave no reply, Riley hurried after her.

"Oi, I'm talking to you!"

She stopped and turned back. He saw her eyes were red and glassy and one look at her told him all he needed to know – she was heartbroken to think Rebel had put himself through so much pain.

"I asked you a question, is he okay?"

"Yes, he will be fine, he just needs to rest. And then I'm going to have a serious talk with him -"

"Get off his case."

She blinked.

"Excuse me?"

"I said, get off his case! You should know what he's like by now, stop trying to change him!"

She gave a weary sigh.

"I'm trying to protect him! His empathic receptor is abnormal, it shouldn't be there! And it's proving dangerous because he's seeking out more and more physical pain. It's separate to the rest of his body, it's a mutation that's getting stronger -"

"Yeah yeah, whatever... my best mate is a mutant. So what? I make him right – it's part of his regeneration, it's how he turned out. He's not scared of it, so why should you worry about it so much?"

Riley's words had angered her more than he knew.

"First of all," she said, struggling to resist the urge to yell at him, "I understand the nature of the empathic receptor much more than you do, I've been studying it! And I'm not trying to change him I'm trying to help him, to protect him -"

"From himself? He's a big boy, Carla. He can cope. You'll put him off if you keep on like you are."

Her face started to flush.

"I don't know what you mean."

"I think you do. You care about him and he likes you too. But don't push it, know what I'm saying? You can't change him. Even if you made a cybernetic implant that could control the receptor, it won't change who he is. He's still going to be the man he's been since he regenerated. He'll still be Rebel, still do all the stuff he does now. If you can't accept that you should look elsewhere."

"Look for what?" she asked as her blush deepened.

Riley shook his head.

"And I thought I was meant to be the stupid one around here! You're a smart girl, Carla. But you need to open your eyes. You can't change him, that's all I'm saying. He's my best mate, I just want him to be happy."

"So do I," she said quietly.

"Well that's good, you want him to be happy too... I'm glad you get what I'm on about. I'll see you later, Carla. I need some air."

Then Riley walked away, leaving her in the corridor as she thought on all he had said.

And then the thought hit her that Rebel had obviously talked to Riley about his feelings for her...

"Riley!" she called out, "Wait up, I'm coming with you!"


Rebel sat up cautiously and found the worst of the pain had eased off. He wasn't sure if it was because the deepest of the wounds had been closed, or if his own healing abilities had healed the worst of his injuries.

He felt exhausted as he stood up and walked to the door of the lab.

And then he heard the sound of a door closing somewhere deep in the Tardis.

"Riley?"

There was no response.

"Carla?"

Once again he was met with silence.

He looked left and right, saw no one and began to walk towards the console room. His head was down as he walked along the smooth floor, thinking about Carla's reaction to his injuries. She had cried over him, and he felt guilty even though he saw no reason to feel guilty about his actions...

And then he heard another sound:

High heels walking briskly across the corridor...

He looked up sharply, his eyes wide as he saw a shapely woman in a short black dress walk into the console room.

Rebel caught his breath as a chill passed through his body:

Someone was in the Tardis...

"Who's there?" he called out, but heard no reply.

He quickened his pace despite his exhaustion, feeling stitches pull and a sting of pain as sweat ran down his exposed back.

Buy the time he reached the console room he was shivering, and it was nothing to do with the fact that he was shirtless – the Tardis was warm, but at this moment it seemed as if the whole place had a chill sweep through it.

He entered the console room and stood there staring at the woman who had her back to him as she leaned against the console.

He knew the curve of her hips, the way she stood in heels impossibly high, the way her raven hair shimmered under the lights... He drew in a slow breath, reminding himself it had to be another hallucination, he often hallucinated when he had taken blue mist...

And then he remembered he hadn't taken any blue mist. He hadn't even had a drink for almost a week. He was stone cold sober, and yet she was standing there...

He was afraid to speak her name, but said it in a hushed voice:

"Bella?"

And she turned around and he gave a gasp, staring at her in shock and disbelief:

It was her. It was his dead wife.

She smiled, bright green eyes sparkling as she blinked impossibly long lashes and her dark lipstick shone glossy in the glow of the console room.

"Hello lover," she said sweetly, "I've missed you..."


Far in the future in Perivale, Ace woke up in the Tardis, in the bedroom she shared with the Doctor. He was stroking her hair and then he placed a soft kiss on her shoulder and she smiled as he shifted closer to her, sliding his arm around her as she lay on her side with her back to him, and then his hand rested on their unborn child.

"Sometimes I think about everything we've been through, all the battles we've faced - and I'm so thankful I still have you with me. I'm even more thankful to know you're my wife. I know you're awake. Are you listening?"

"Of course I am," she replied, "I was thinking too. I'm sorry I don't let go of things."

The Doctor ran his fingers through her hair and wished she would turn around so he could see the look in her eyes and know for sure he would see no trace of lingering anger.

"I know what you're talking about but I wouldn't dare say the name while we're in bed."

To his surprise Ace laughed softly.

"Don't be silly, Professor!"

And she turned around, shifting about awkwardly as the weight of the baby made her feel slow and heavy. As she settled down facing him she smiled.

"I know you love me."

"Yes, I do. And I wish you could forget what I did."

Ace leaned closer and kissed him.

"You know I can't do that. But you are forgiven."

"That's good to know."

The Doctor turned on his back and drew in a deep breath. It was still out there, he could feel it, like something was coming closer and soon he would not be able to ignore it...

"Ace, I want to ask you about something."

As she saw the serious look in his eyes she guessed he was having another one of those moments when he thought about past mistakes and regretted it all over again. Which to Ace, wasn't such a bad thing considering he had been unfaithful and she wanted to be sure he never did it again...

She giggled.

"No, when the baby is born we are not asking Carla to be godmother!"

The Doctor's gaze darkened.

"That's not funny!"

"It is to me. And it was a joke! What's wrong with you, Professor? You've been acting weird since yesterday...like you've got something on your mind. I don't get it, what's to worry about?"

As he looked into her eyes he gave a deep sigh and knew in a single beat of his twin hearts that he could not keep the secret from Ace any longer, even though he was yet to find out exactly what that secret was...

"Ace..."

He paused, feeling sorry that the few brief months they had spent trouble-free were about to end at this moment, because he had caught the look in her eyes already, she knew by the tone of his voice that something was wrong...

"What''s this about, Professor?" she said in a hushed voice, "What could possibly go wrong for us now?"

"Not us," he promised her, "It's not about you and me. I don't know what it is...I can feel it, like something is about to happen to one of my other selves."

Ace thought about it.

"Maybe you're just tuning into something heavy, like a past regeneration, perhaps its one of those weird moments when time -"

"Yes, it is about time. It's also about my link to another lifetime, a close link."

Ace felt a creeping sense of unease as she thought about his other selves. The only one he had been close to, the one who had healed him and made their pregnancy possible was...

"Rebel?" she asked, "You think he's in trouble?"

"He's not in trouble yet but I think he will be. I feel he's in some kind of danger. And you're going to hate this part, but just believe me when I say Carla is the only one who can help him. Everything happens for a reason, Ace. There is much more to me saving her from the explosion on the Cassandra-Aurora. I was saving myself in more ways than one but I can't make sense of that yet. And I'm holding nothing back from you. This is me telling you everything I know."

As she looked into his eyes she knew he was being honest, she could almost see past his gaze and deep into his Time Lord soul and at that moment his gaze was almost too much to bear – he had, for a moment, let all barriers down showing her there was nothing to hide, no secrets lurking deep inside him...

Then he blinked and the moment was gone, and Ace was thankful his gaze had lost the almost unbearable level of intensity that went far beyond anything earthly.

"We need to lay the negative side of the past to rest," he told her, "Because if that man is in trouble I will be there for him. I need you to know that, because our child wouldn't be possible without his healing abilities. He's a good man but not without his problems and there's something..he's going to make a huge mistake if I don't stop him. Maybe I can't stop him, maybe I've got this all wrong – I just know something terrible is going to happen and he needs my help."

Ace gave a sigh.

"I hope you are wrong. You said everything would be different now!"

"And it will be! But I can't turn away from him."

Ace saw deep sincerity in his eyes and knew better than to throw the past and Carla back in his face now.

"If he does need your help, I'll be there too," she promised, and she put her arms around him and held him tightly.

And then the Doctor felt the baby move and suddenly her words chilled him:

There was no chance of him letting Ace join him if he did need to find his other self again, because he knew something was coming, and he would have to keep her and the baby far away from it - because even though he didn't know what he was about to face, he did know it was dark and cold as death itself, because he could feel it...


Rebel stood in the console room of his Tardis and stared in shock at the sight of Bella as she walked towards him. She looked solid, he could even smell her perfume and there was nothing remotely ghostly about her. She was wearing a dress he bought her for her birthday. She was real...

"This is not possible..." he said in a hushed voice as she approached him.

Then he tuned into his empathic receptor, feeling certain it would reveal the truth of the matter:

And every moment he had ever shared with Bella came flooding back, her kiss, her touch, the love they had shared, the birth of their two children - and then as tears blurred his eyes he saw her swallowed up by flame, he felt her agony as she died while a planet burned...

He gave a gasp and blinked away tears as he shook his head.

"No, you're dead...you can't be here..."

She was standing in front of him, jet black hair glossy and her eyes sparkling with life that seemed to cancel out the possibility that she was dead – she looked so alive that her death now seemed impossible...

"Yes I am dead," she agreed, "And it's not your fault."

Tears ran down down his face and he felt as if his hearts had shattered all over again.

"I searched for you," he whispered, "And you were gone. You and the children...I died too, I burned up – but I regenerated."

She looked him up and down, noticing his shirt was off and her gaze lingered on the lettering tattooed across his chest.

"Rebel," she said, and then she smiled.

"You certainly have changed. You are nothing like the man I called Doctor. You look like a stranger to me – but I know you're still the man I loved."

And he reached out to touch her but she stepped back and placed her hand on a screen on the console.

"What are you doing?" he said, still feeling as if he was witnessing the impossible.

She looked down at the screen and it began to scroll, then it flashed as images came and went.

"What are you doing?"

"Showing you the way."

She took her hand off the screen and looked up from the console.

"I've given you a star map. You need to follow it."

He was still looking at her intently.

"Why?"

"Because it leads to us."

"Us?"

"Me and the children. It's a world where life continues after death. We miss you. We want you to join us."

He gave a sob as more tears ran down his face.

"No, this can't be true..."

She looked into his eyes.

"Your regeneration went wrong," she said softly, "There is a mutation inside you that will ultimately destroy you. But there's nothing to be afraid of. There is no death, lover. Trust me and face it with courage."

His face paled as he stared at her.

Then he looked down at the star map illuminated on the Tardis computer screen, it showed an area of deep and distant space, dark space that seemed empty.

"Trust me," she said again, and he looked up from the screen, into the eyes of his wife as his twin hearts raced with fear.

"There's nothing out there, its a void!"

"The planet is unseen to the living," she replied, "Only the dead can see Stellar Eternus."

He looked back at the screen that showed a map of dark, empty space.

"No," he told her again, "This can't be true, it's impossible!"

She stepped closer and he felt the warmth of her presence as the scent of her perfume surrounded him.

"I miss you," she said, "And so do the children. It's not long until you join us. We're all waiting for you."

And he wanted to reach out again and try to touch her, but she stepped back.

"Trust me, lover," she said softly, "There's nothing to fear. I'm here for you."

And he looked back at Bella, who remained standing at the console, refusing to fade out like he hoped she would – she just stood there smiling as he looked down at the screen and tried but failed to see any trace of a planet deep in dark, empty space...