"So he just asked you to come over?" Jerry said, dumbfounded. I nodded, still shocked and slightly confused with the conversation I had had with him the night before. I was running lines with Jerry at the moment, every once and a while shooting the breeze. He was more confused by my situation with River than I was. Jerry looked at me for a minute before speaking again.
"I really don't get it. You didn't seem to like each other all that much yesterday. Now you're going to meet his family? I know I'm only eleven.." I smiled as he tried to make sense of it all. Little did he know, I was trying to make sense of the matter as well.
"I'm just kinda rollin' with the punches, ya know what I mean? I aint the kind of person to hold a grudge. I don't exactly know him. But I'm not mad. I mean it's not like I'm an angel. I say things I regret sometimes, just in the heat of the moment. River said he was sorry, I can live with that." I laid down on the green grass and shut my eyes. River's apology was bland, but so was every apology I had ever made.
"Hey, that's really nice of you. Did you bring those sandwiches, Jay?" Jerry asked. I chuckled. I saw that one coming from a mile away. I nodded, keeping my eyes shut. Jerry got up to tell the other guys about the food. I smiled to myself, laughing a bit.
"Hello Jordan." I hear a soft voice. I open my eyes to see River standing above me. I sighed, realizing he never called me Jay like a preferred.
"Jay, call me Jay. I don't like being called by my full name." I stated, sitting up and resting my weight on my palms, which were firmly placed behind me.
"Your first name is fine. You were given it at birth, it's what you should be called. It's not a bad name Jordan. Why don't ya like your name?" he asked me. There was so many reasons why I didn't like my first name. My first name truly annoyed the shit out of me.
"It's so… not unique. It's so common. I would have rather been named something grand and with meaning. Like Esmeralda or-" River cut me off by waving his hands in the air. He looked up at me, his green eyes very serious.
"Jordan. I want you to listen real good to what I'm saying right now. Your name may not be the least used name in the entire world, but I think what really gives a name meaning is a personality to go right along with it." I smiled a bit. Someone had actually managed to make me feel good about my first name. My parents didn't even call me by my full name anymore.
"You'll die when you hear my middle name. I kind of wish it was my first name just because I've never met anyone with that name before." I remarked. He nodded for me to continue.
"My middle name is Pistol. My dad's really into guns as you probably guessed yesterday and he said he had a gut feeling I was going to end up being a fiery little pistol just like mom is. So, I'm Jordan Pistol Maynes." He smiled at me. I couldn't believe it, I may have found common ground with River Phoenix. River didn't say anything though, he sat there for a moment, studying my face intently.
"Jordan Pistol Maynes. I've never met anyone like you in my life." He rested his hand on mine. My breath hitched. His touch was something I had never experienced. And, it was nothing like anything I ever had.
"You think a small town girl from up in the mountains of Northern California has ever met a guy like you, River Phoenix?" I smiled lightly, as he shook his head as he looked down at the grass.
"I accept you." He whispered, looking up and staring at me intently again. I gave him a look that expressed my confusion.
"I don't agree with anything you stand for, Jordan. But I find myself accepting it all. Because I feel that maybe if I bring myself to accept you, for you… you would possibly allow me to spend more time with you." I began to breath faster. What an unlikely friendship I felt as though I may had found in River Phoenix.
"And maybe I want to accept you River." River scooted closer to me. But we suddenly heard Rob yell that it was time for the boys to start sound check. River hopped up offering his hand. I took it and quickly bounded for the tree house, leaving River behind. I really didn't want him to see me blush.
After sound rehearsal, I passed the sandwiches to all of the boys, excluding River of course. River couldn't even look at it.
"Um, River… how about you come with me." I grabbed my lunch, which was in a brown paper bag and headed to another picnic table a good twenty feet away. I had eaten my sandwich while they were in sound check so he would have someone to talk to that wasn't eating meat. He sat down across from me, a muddled look on his face. I pulled out some granola and yogurt.
"I wasn't going to make you watch us eat meat again. That would be cruel. You can handle me eating yogurt, I know vegans do-" he cut me off like he seemed to sometimes. He was staring at me once again. He always seemed to stare at me, like I was something worth looking at.
"Jordan, it was very courteous of you to think of me when choosing your food. I can be around you when you're eating yogurt and eggs and milk and other things. It's just meat that I truly can't stand to watch people eat." I avoided eye contact with him once again, not wanting to blush. I felt his eyes very much fixed on me still.
"Do you avoid eye contact with me when I make you blush Jordan?" More heat came rushing to my face. He seemed to be doing this on purpose. Maybe to get a rise out of me. I didn't want to say something stupid like 'shut up' or something but it was like he'd taken my witty come backs away from me. I knew if I kept hanging around River Phoenix, any kind of guard I had ever built up would come down. I would be forced to be raw. River laughed, I knew he'd known the answer all along.
"I still don't like it when you call me that River." He laughed again. A laugh that made you think of happiness. Of the simplicity in life.
"Well if you really don't like I guess we'll have to find a name you do like. You said you wanted something unique, didn't you?" I nodded my head. I truly did want something different. Something that stood out.
"Jordan… Jay…. Jay… Blue Jay. Blue. There it is, Blue." River smiled at me. Don't blush! I scolded myself as I felt my face heat up once more.
As we finished lunch, River continued to call me Blue. It made me blush obviously. One particular time, he even said something that embarrassed me a bit. My eyes widened and my face began to burn. My first instinct was to walk away, which I did begin to do. Only to feel a tug on my forearm.
"Don't be embarrassed. You make my heart skip beat when I'm only looking at you." I whispered simply in my ear. I felt butterflies in my stomach.
We stood outside the woodland area where the tree house was located and we had spent the day working, waiting for River's mother, Heart. He spoke very fondly of his mother, saying she was something that he didn't think he could live without. Though River told me he helped his family financially, he told me that he couldn't be here without his family's loving and emotional support. When his mother pulled up, we walked up to the car. Three other children were in the car as far as I could see.
"Hello sweet heart, I'm Heart. You must be…" She looked as though she was lost. River then finished for her.
"Blue, mom." He said to her simply, as we finally reached the car. River opened the car door for me, I smiled a thank you towards him. I was right, there was three other children in the car. They didn't look very much like River at all. River got into the front seat beside his mother.
"So I heard that you eat meat." A boy in the back of the car said matter-of-factly.
"Yes I do, actually. You're all vegan like River I assume?" The boy nodded. I smiled at him. He was young, maybe nine or ten I supposed.
"So you do eat meat?" A teenage girl said with an arched eyebrow. I nodded nervously. I honestly felt out numbered. And to be perfectly blunt, I was afraid they were going to judge me the same way I had felt River had in the beginning.
"Leave her alone, Rain. I don't want to hear you talk to her again." River said, not even turning around to face us.
"I'm sorry. I was just curious, River. She's just so…"
"What you are trying to say is.. not like you." She was left dumbfounded, the way her brother had been when I had told him off the day before. I didn't say a word the rest of the way home, and neither did anyone else. To my surprise, when we pulled into their driveway and parked, River grabbed my hand and led me inside. Another little girl who was maybe six or seven was sitting on their couch, writing. As soon as she saw River, her eyes lit up with pure joy. It melted my heart.
"River! Do you want to read what I just wrote for my story?" She asked excitedly. He picked her up and swung the tan girl around.
"Of course I do Summer. How's Bobby Banana doing?" Summer giggled. This was a very family oriented home.
"Do you want to help us write about Bobby Banana?" She asked me. I didn't know how to answer. I didn't know how things rolled in their home. I didn't know if it was some sort of sibling ritual they did and no one else could do it. I stuttered a bit, not wanting to ignore the little girl.
"Come and sit, Blue." River invited, already seated on the couch. I smiled awkwardly at Summer before sitting next to River.
"I want Bobby to make friends with someone that isn't a fruit!" River said enthusiastically to his sister. Summer's nose scrunched up in confusion. It was sort of funny, how they had absolutely no fear of anything that came out of their mouth sounding weird. I had grown up hoping not to accidentally say anything that may raise eyebrows. This seemed like the kind of place where it was encouraged.
"How about Debbie dinosaur." I suggested quietly. Summer looked at me as if I had just suggested we jump off the edge of a cliff. She studied me the way her brother always seemed to. As if trying to memorize every part of my face.
"But they're so different…" Summer looked from River to me until River finally spoke up. I knew that he knew I wasn't going to speak.
"Well Summer. When things are different, it makes things less boring. Don't you think it takes many types of people to have a good world?" She nodded her head. What kind of small child could comprehend such philosophical words that had just left River's mouth?
"River, she's different. But she's still good, isn't she?" Summer said, pointing at me. I became nervous again. The fear of judgment was looming.
"Yeah, Summer. She's still good." River stared at me once more
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