Wrecked

by:

A.K. Hunter

Part Two


Alexis was just falling asleep when someone started pounding at her front door. Who the hell?

"Alexis!" A voice called through the door, pounding. It was Kevin.

She tugged open the door. "What's the-"

He pushed past her, storming into her apartment.

"Come on in," she muttered. What was he doing at her apartment at this hour? In fact, what was he doing there at all? It had been a couple days since she'd seen him at the precinct, and truth be told, she didn't expect to see him one-on-one anytime soon. She had wondered how things had ended up with Jenny, if he'd been honest with his wife, but she hadn't heard anything from the detective. Perhaps no news didn't necessarily mean good news.

As soon as the door was locked, he rounded on her. "I hope you're happy."

"Excuse me?"

"I told Jenny. I told her everything."

Alexis took in his broken expression. Oh. So it hadn't gone so well then. "Do you want to sit down?"

"She called me a liar. She said that she won't wait to have a baby, and if I can't give her what she wants then she's going to find someone who will."

"What? She can't give you more time?"

He shook his head. "She's thirty-two. She said she doesn't have time to wait around for me to figure out what I want."

Wow. There wasn't really a way around that one. Alexis hadn't realized that Jenny was so determined or that her need for a baby was so urgent. Jenny and Kevin had only been married for about a year; she'd assumed that there would be more time for them.

"I-I'm sorry, Kevin. I'm so sorry."

Her apology seemed to deflate whatever anger had brought him to her door. He collapsed onto the couch, resting his head in his hands. "No, I'm sorry," he said. "It's not your fault. I shouldn't have come here, pounding on your door like that." He looked at her, taking in her tousled hair and pajamas for the first time since he'd crossed the threshold into her apartment. "Did I wake you?"

She shook her head, sitting next to him. He had bigger things to worry about than her sleep cycle. "What are you going to do?"

"I don't know."

"Are you– I mean, do you think she'll want a divorce?"

"If I don't go along with this, then yes. That's exactly what will happen."

Alexis' eyes widened. "Wait. You're actually considering having a baby with her after all?"

"She's my wife. I made a promise to love and support her."

"And didn't she promise to love and support you back? Don't you get to be happy, too?"

He shook his head again. "Breaking Jenny's heart won't make me happy."

"Then what will?" she demanded. "God, this is a baby we're talking about. A baby you don't want. How can you just go along with this?"

He shrugged. "It's what I'm supposed to do. I'm sure I'll love the baby; I'll learn to be happy with it."

She couldn't believe what she was hearing. Alexis had been shocked that Kevin opened up to her the first time, and she was still surprised to be the person he chose to confide in. It seemed like he really needed a confidante; she hadn't realized how much pressure he put on himself to be a good husband, to provide for his wife and make her happy. It broke Alexis' heart that he was willing to do so much, to consent to so many things he didn't want, in order to fulfill that role.

"Don't do it," she said quietly. "This isn't something you can just compromise on. You'd be giving up living the life you want. Don't do it."

Kevin looked up at her in surprise. She felt a little surprised at herself as well. Alexis had tried to be neutral, she didn't want to get in the middle of the Ryans' marriage troubles, but she just couldn't sit by and watch him give up everything he wanted.

"You're nineteen," he said. "What do you know about marriage and compromise?"

"I know it's better for you and Jenny to get a divorce than to bring a human life into the world for all the wrong reasons."

He stood up, heading to the door. "I don't have to listen to this."

Alexis stood in his way. "What do you really want, Kevin?"

"Get out of my way."

She stood her ground, pushing him back when he got too close. "What do you want?"

"Alexis, stop-"

"Tell me what you want!"

"I don't know!"

He sighed, too exhausted to be angry anymore. "I don't know," he repeated softly. "I can't do this anymore: the baby, the constant pressure to find a new job. I didn't sign up for this, but how am I supposed to tell her to give up everything she wants? How am I supposed to walk away from her? From our life together? Doesn't that make me just as selfish?"

Alexis shook her head. "There's nothing selfish about wanting to be happy. You sacrifice, willingly, so other people can be safe and at peace. So you're not ready for kids? So what. That doesn't make you a bad person. It doesn't make you selfish."

"What does it make me?"

"A good man," she said softly, "who deserves a happy, fulfilling life without fear or regret. And if Jenny can't see that then she doesn't deserve you."

Kevin nodded and looked down. He bit his lip, his mind clearly miles away. Finally, his gaze focused on her once more. "Thank you."

Alexis smiled. "You're welcome."

The barest hint of a smile tugged at the corner of his mouth as he stared at her and heat rose in her face, the blush spreading down her neck. "You know," he said as he reached into the pocket of his coat, "I actually came to return this." He held out her scarf, which had been neatly folded. "You left it at the precinct."

"I've been looking everywhere for this," she smiled. Her fingers brushed against his as she took the scarf back, and electricity ran up her arm from the contact. She glanced up at him, her blush deepening at the amused look on his face. She cleared her throat. "Thanks."

He nodded. "I'd better go."

"You're going back home?"

"Um… no," he said. "I don't think Jenny's going to let me back in the apartment tonight."

"Where will you go?"

He shrugged. "Probably a hotel. I'll figure it out."

"You can stay here." The words left her mouth before she was fully cognizant of them. "Um… That is, you can sleep on my couch." She immediately cringed at the unnecessary clarification.

"I don't think that's a good idea."

"Why not?"

"It's just– It's weird, isn't it? Me spending the night at Castle's daughter's apartment."

Her eyebrows rose at his explanation. If there was one thing Alexis hated, it was being identified as Richard Castle's daughter. She was her own person, and she wasn't a little girl anymore. "Kevin," she said, "You know I'm an adult, right?"

Smart detective that he was, Kevin picked up on the subtle threat in her tone. "Yes," he said carefully. "I know you're an adult."

"And we're friends, right?"

"I guess so?"

"Good," she said cheerfully. "Because friends don't let friends go to a hotel when they're going through a hard time. You might as well make yourself comfortable." She left him standing in her living room as she searched for a couple extra blankets. She took a pillow from off her bed.

When she returned to the living room, he was sitting on her couch, untying his shoes. His jacket and tie were draped over the back of the couch. "You don't have to put me up for the night," he said as she deposited the bedclothes next to him. "I'm really fine."

She took in his appearance: the circles that hugged his bloodshot eyes, the uncharacteristic slouch of his shoulders, the wrinkles in his clothes. He looked beaten down, exhausted. "I know you are," she lied, "but I'd feel better if you stayed." She would let him pretend if it meant he actually got some rest. He clearly needed it. "Unopened toothbrushes are in the bathroom cupboard, and you can help yourself to anything in the fridge."

He nodded, distractedly running his hands through his hair.

"Are you alright?" Alexis asked.

"I just never expected my night to end like this, my marriage in shambles, sleeping on your couch." He laughed bitterly. "Life's a bitch, isn't it?"

For a moment, she just watched the pain play across his face, unsure how to offer the comfort he desperately needed. Then she sat next to him and wrapped an arm around him, resting her head on his shoulder. She had expected him to shy away from the gesture—he seemed to be on guard around her—but instead he leaned into her.

He exhaled raggedly, and Alexis shifted so both of her arms were wrapped around him. She hugged him tightly, running her hands up and down his back. "I know it hurts right now," she whispered, "but it will get better."

She felt him nod against her neck, and a few drops of moisture landed on her skin. His arms tightened around her as his chest heaved with emotion. "It's okay. You're going to be okay," she said. "I promise."

They stayed like that for a while, Alexis whispering to him, holding him as he quietly fell apart. Once his breathing had leveled out, she pulled back and gently wiped the last few tears from his face. "Do you feel better?"

His voice was hoarse, his expression devastated. "Not really."

She forced a smile, despite the fact that her heart was breaking for him. Nobody deserved to carry around that much pain. "What can I do?"

"I don't know."

"Do you want me to leave you alone so you can sleep?"

He shook his head, and she frowned. He needed rest. A good night's sleep was the only thing that would help him at this point. She glanced around them, her mind running through logistics. She set the pillow on the end of the couch and pushed him toward it. "Lie down. I'll be right back."

He complied, and she moved around her apartment, switching off the lights and turning down the thermostat. She returned to the couch. She couldn't see Kevin in the darkness, but she felt his fingertips brush against her legs. "Alexis?"

She knew what he wanted, and she knew he would never ask for it. Especially not from her. Kevin didn't want to be alone, so she would make sure he wasn't. Alexis took a deep breath to calm herself, and then lay next to him on the couch, pulling a blanket over the both of them. Carefully, slowly, she wrapped her arms around him, letting his head rest in the crook of her shoulder as her own head pressed against the pillow.

His arms tightened around her waist and he inhaled deeply. "Thank you," he whispered brokenly.

She stroked his hair until his breathing evened out, sure that she'd spend the night awake. There was no way she could sleep, not with his body pressed against hers, not when her heart raced at the sensation of his warm breath across her collarbone and when the light scent of his cologne invaded her nose.

Yet, it didn't even occur to Alexis to be surprised when her eyes grew heavy and she slipped into dreams, lulled to sleep by the steady breathing of the man slumbering next to her.


Kevin dreamed every night. Sometimes the dreams were frightening, the worst-case scenarios that he faced every single day at work. Sometimes the dreams were happy, the kind he never wanted to wake up from. Other times his dreams were just bizarre, like that one time he'd dreamed that Beckett was a writer and Castle was a homicide detective.

Lately, his dreams had been filled with anxiety. He'd spend the night chasing after something that always evaded him, or he would belatedly find out that Jenny was pregnant and he'd missed the birth of their baby. He woke up from those dreams more exhausted than when he'd fallen asleep the night before.

When Kevin opened his eyes to the early-morning light streaming in through the windows, feeling more rested than he'd been in months, he realized that he'd come out of a dreamless sleep. No real-world anxieties had invaded his brain during the night.

And then he realized that he wasn't alone. A soft, warm weight pressed against his torso, smelling vaguely of cherry blossoms. Endless strands of red hair were spread out across his chest, and one long, bare leg was draped over his hip. What the...

And then Kevin remembered, and his body went rigid as he realized exactly who was lying next to him. Castle was going to kill him.

Alexis burrowed her face into the crook of his neck, pressing her body closer to his. He fought back a groan. Between the sensation of her mouth pressed against his skin and the way her hips shifted every time she moved, his body was betraying him in the most mortifying way. His hands slid down her back to her hips in an attempt to hold her still, and electricity sparked in his blood when his fingertips met bare skin. Her shirt had ridden up a few inches during the night.

He took a deep breath, his mind racing to find a way out of the increasingly uncomfortable situation. What had he even been thinking? Alexis was so young, so kind. Seeking comfort in her arms wasn't right. She deserved better than to have him dump all of his troubles on her, and yet he hadn't even given it a second thought when he'd gotten her address from Beckett. His life was falling apart, and she was the only one he wanted to talk to. Why was that? Because he knew she wouldn't judge him? Or was it because she was the only one who didn't demand anything from him? She was the only one who brought him peace.

Her fingers tightened around the fabric of his shirt, and he watched goosebumps rise on her skin. With his one free hand, he draped the blanket over her. His other hand mindlessly drew circles on her back. He needed to leave. He needed to put some space between them before this situation got any more inappropriate, but he wanted to stay.

His internal clock and the dim morning light told him he had a little time before heading back to his apartment. He wanted to spend that time crammed on Alexis' tiny couch, engulfed in her scent, relishing in the rise and fall of her chest against his. He gently brushed her hair back, mesmerized by the length of her eyelashes, the angle of her cheekbones, the full pout of her lips–

No. No, he wasn't going there. He wasn't thinking about that. He was married, and she was nineteen. It was beyond inappropriate; it was just plain wrong. Kevin ignored the voice in his head reminding him that Alexis was very much an adult. He took another deep breath, almost jolting off of the couch in shock when he realized he was being watched by a pair of sleep-hazed blue eyes.

Kevin froze, and for a moment they just stared at one another. He felt her body tense, and his hand stilled against the bare skin of her back. What could he say to her? Should he thank her? Should he apologize? Should he find some way out of their heaven-sent situation and leave?

His mind quieted when her cold fingertips brushed his hair from his forehead. He sank into the gesture, his eyes fluttering shut against the gentle, soothing sensation. She was doing it again, destroying every bit of anxiety and self-imposed guilt with one simple touch. How did she do that?

When his eyes opened again, she had a soft smile on her face. He loved that smile. His hand caught hers and, without thinking about it, he brushed a kiss over the back of her fingers. Her eyes widened, but she didn't pull away. His thumb pressed against the inside of her wrist, and he felt her pulse race. He kept his hand there, using it as a measure of sorts. Was her heart racing because she was uncomfortable? She didn't pull away from his touch, and she watched him with rapidly dilating eyes. No, she wasn't afraid.

His hand skimmed over her arm and shoulder, coming to rest just under her jaw. His fingers sank into her hair, and he tipped his head down so their noses were almost touching. Her mouth was inches away, and he watched her reaction closely. In the back of his mind, where common decency was screaming at him to stop, he knew that closing the distance between them would cross a line. A line that could never be uncrossed.

He stayed still, never taking his eyes off of hers, his mind cataloguing every movement and intake of breath. She glanced down at his mouth then locked eyes with him once more.

All of Kevin's concerns slipped away as Alexis pulled him close by the collar of his shirt and gently pressed her lips against his.


Author's Note: I hope you liked the newest installment of Wrecked. You'll notice that the rating has been changed to "M" for adult content in future chapters.

Many thanks to everyone who reviewed the last chapter. You guys are great at motivating me! Please, please, please review!