The Real Credits
Monty Python
and
The Holy Grail
More credits you don't care about
All the text you shall see below this is subtitles, until I tell-er, write-er…f*ck it. Until the text says it's not.
Wi not trei a holiday in Sweden this yer?
…
See the loveli lakes
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The wonderful telephone system
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And mani interesting furry animals
…
Including the majestik moose
…
A moose once bit my sister…
…
No realli! She was Karving her initials on the moose with the sharpened end of an interspace toothbrush given to her by Svenge-her brother-in-law-an Oslo dentist and star of many Norwegian moves: "The Hot Hands of an Oslo Dentist", "Fillings of Passion", "The Huge Molars of Horst Nordfink"…
…
OK, the text isn't subtitles anymore. Got it? Good.
…
Beep! Beep! Beep!
We apologize for the fault in the subtitles. Those responsible have been sacked.
Wait, the text is subtitles again. Damnit!
Mynd you, moose bites Kan be pretti nasti…
Wait, now the text isn't subtitles. Ugh…
We apologize again for the fault in the subtitles. Those responsible for sacking the people who have just been sacked, have been sacked.
Production Manager-Someone you don't care about
Something you don't care about- Someone you don't care about
Something you don't care about- Someone you don't care about
Something you don't care about- Someone you don't care about
Something you don't care about- Someone you don't care about
Something you don't care about- Someone you don't care about
Something you don't care about- Someone you don't care about
Something you don't care about- Someone you don't care about
Moose Trained by-Yutte Hermsgervordenbrotborda
Something you don't care about- Someone you don't care about
Special Moose Effects-Olaf Prot
Moose Costumes-Siggi Churchill
Something you don't care about- Someone you don't care about
Moose choreographed by-Horst Prot III
Miss Taylor's Mooses by Hengst Douglas-Home
Moose trained to mix concrete and sign complicated insurance forms by-Jurgen Wigg
Something you don't care about- Someone you don't care about
Mooses noses wiped by-Bjorn Irkestom-Slater Walker
Large moose on the left hand side of the screen in the third seen from the end, given a thorough grounding in Latin, French, and 'O' Level Geography by-Bo Benn
Suggestive poses for the moose suggested by-Vic Rotter
Antler-care by-Liv Thatch-
Beep! Beep! Beep!
The directors of the firm hired to continue the credits after the other people had been sacked, wish it to be known that they have just been sacked.
The credits have been completed in an entirely different style at great expense and at the last minute
*Cue even crappier music than before*
Executive Producer
JOHN GOLDSTONE & "RALPH" THE WONDER LLAMA
Producer
MARK FORSTATER
Assisted By
EARL J. LLAMA
MILT Q. LLAMA III
SY LLAMA
MERLE Z. LLAMA IX
Directed by
40 SPECIALLY TRAINED
ECUADORIAN MOUNTAIN LLAMAS
6 VENEZUELAN RED LLAMAS
142 MEXICAN WHOOPING LLAMAS
14 NORTH CHILEAN GUANACOS
(CLOSELY RELATED TO THE LLAMA)
REG LLAMA OF BRIXTON
76000 BATTERLY LLAMAS
FROM "LLAMA-FRESH" FARMS LTD. NEAR PARAGUAY
and
TERRY GILLIAM & TERRY JONES
Whew! Finally done with the credits…now I have approximately 90 minutes of film to go through. Sigh.
