Title: Frozen (Chapter 2)
By: Maverick88
Disclaimer: obviously all the characters belong to the Twilight universe created by Stephanie Meyer. I'm just playing around with them.
A/N: thanks for the kind reviews! I can't tell you how great it is to open up your mailbox and read that people like your stuff, or atleast took the time to read it all. So keep em coming! Like it, hate it: voice your opinion! One more thing: English isn't my first language, so sorry for all the mistakes I might or might not have made.
Okay, onto the story:
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Real pain cannot be described. I can tell you how much I squirmed, writhed and screamed. I can tell you I flailed my arms and legs with so much force Carlisle had to pin me down in order to keep me in bed. But words fail to describe the intensity of it. When my transition advanced into 2nd gear, the pain was relentless. It was all consuming, crippling Hell.
I was on the verge of becoming insane. Pain was the only thing I could think of, yet my head hurt so much I could barely think at all. My heart was straining to beat the thick venom mixture around. But it was a stubborn little bastard, because I'd figured it would've stopped working by now. Luck wasn't on my side: I was still going on strong, 30 beats per minute.
I just wanted it all to be over. I wanted to die. I wanted someone to take me to the North Pole and turn me into a Penguin.
"Bella?"
Through the haze of agony my ears picked up the familiar honey voice. It was as beautiful but it sounded wrong. Feminine.
"Rosalie." It came out as a grunt. I winced as I felt the rawness of my own voice. My mind wasn't ready to deal, couldn't comprehend. What was she doing here? Suddenly an anger so fierce it was terrifying boiled up inside me.
She was going to ask me if I regretted my decision. She was going to remind me how wrong I was. I couldn't see her but it wasn't hard to picture that gorgeous, angeletic face mocking me. I also wasn't sure I was able to contain myself if she did. I took comfort in the idea that Carlisle could.
I clenched my fists when I sensed her getting closer to me. My ears picked up the sound of a chair being moved over to my side. I still didn't open my eyes. I was too afraid.
Another wave of scorching pain went through me and I gasped, but I managed to snap my mouth shut before yet another scream could escape. I would not give her the satisfaction of hearing me.
"I thought you'd like some distraction, since Edward is hunting with the others."
Edward. Carlisle had ordered him to participate after my initial bribe failed. The only reason he agreed to leave my side was because Alice would tag along. And because he'd rather cut off an arm than refuse Carlisle. I was happy he went. I didn't want him to be here when I was my worst. I'd been trying to bite back the agony, but sometimes I couldn't help myself. He needed the distraction as much as I did.
"I brought some books, which I'll read to you, so you have something to focus on."
I was struggling to grasp everything she said. Was Rosalie being nice to me? I must've been hallucinating again. I carefully opened one of my eyes. And there she was alright, like a dark angel. Her eyes were light, butterscotch. Full lips were curved into a hesitant smile. Long blonde hair framed her pale face, falling down her shoulders like a wild waterfall.
By now I was used to her impossible beauty.
What shocked me was her gaze –filled with nothing but concern for me. A detached part of my mind wondered if that was the new ability I was bringing into this life: making friend and fiend go all mushy on me.
"I…thought…you…didn't…like me." A tremor racked through my body like a thunderclap. I groaned, squeezed my eyes shut and curled up in a ball. No more talk from my side today, I vowed.
Silence filled the room. It took so long that at one point I wondered if she left. The burning sensation of being thrown inside a pool of lava kept my mind occupied enough to allow for some things to slip by unnoticed.
"I couldn't understand it at first." Rosalie's velvet voice led my thoughts away from the burning depths of my personal Hell. I concentrated on it.
"You had so much potential in your human life. A loving family, friends… I knew you loved Edward, but I couldn't understand how you could throw away everything just like that. Like I told you, your life was the dream I secretly cherished. I'm content, but to have children, to grow old, to go through all stages of age, that is what I really want."
She paused, as if weighing her words. I was painfully aware of the silence and let out a sigh of relief when she continued.
"But then I saw you and Edward together. Really saw you. I was always too shallow to believe that any love could be stronger than what's between Emmet and I. I ignored it when we first left you, even though it was painfully obvious Edward would be never more than a shadow of his former self without you."
She took a deep breath. She was struggling with her story. Her words didn't seem to flow as seamlessly as they used to.
"I ignored it when you tried to kill yourself, showing that you had as much of a hole in your chest as he did. And then, thanks to me, Edward snapped and almost got himself killed. I might have just as well pulled the trigger myself."
I flinched at the memory and the deep regret that rang in those words.
"And then you showed up." She cast her eyes downward, her shoulders slumping.
"I had a hard time straightening myself out. Edward wouldn't spare me one look. He still hasn't forgiven me." The last part was almost inaudible.
"When I last talked to you, I still hadn't fully allowed myself to grasp what you two are to each other. To confuse things more, that wolf pup followed you around like you were a bitch in heat."
She stopped to see if she'd offended me. She hadn't. But considering my brain seemed to be of as much use as a boiled egg filling up my skull, I couldn't say for sure.
"But I understand now. Real love is as consuming as the pain you're in now." She said thoughtfully.
I just gaped at her absently. I filed everything away for further analysis, because right now I was sure my mind had turned into Jell-O.
She misread my expression and stiffened. "I understand if you want me to go away."
"No…don't." I tried to sit up, but fell back into the pillow panting as another stab of pain threatened to split me in half. "I'm….just…can't focus." Hell, I couldn't even formulate one grammatically correct sentence.
"Read to me, please." That came out better than expected and I was rewarded with one of her infamous megawatt smiles. Her enthusiasm reminded me of Alice, though I wouldn't have dreamed of comparing the two before.
"I know you like reading all that heavy literature. But I figured something light and harmless was more suitable." She held up a Harry Potter book and I couldn't help myself. I laughed.
The sound was hollow and raspy and it made my chest contract, but it was welcome.
I let my head sink back into the pillow as Rosalie's colorful voice carried the story. Before I closed my eyes, I glanced in Carlisle's direction.
Edward's adoptive father stood leaning against the entrance like a statue and I could swear I saw a smile tugging at his lips.
The pain was still there, the constant ache ravaging my body. But now it acted more like a neglected mistress than anything else. I knew then, that I was going to be alright. No matter what.
TBC…..
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A/N: I hope you all liked that. I also hope you the way I wrote Rosalie made sense to you. And don't worry, all the Cullens have a place in my story. While I'm borrowing them, I might as well make some use of them, right? Feedback would be appreciated!
