"So, have you settled back in now?"
She nodded, accepting the cup he offered her. After Archangel's return to Orb, Cagalli-san had found her a new place to live, a little house in a quiet neighbourhood with a picturesque view of the ocean. It wasn't far from the rebuilt beach house where Kira-kun and Lacus-san lived, and most evenings found her walking over the white sand to visit the young couple, and play with the orphan children. The familiarity of it all had helped her readjust to a peaceful life, as had her return to work at Morgenroete. Things were just the same as they had been before she'd left.
Well, almost.
Because now...he was here.
When Archangel had returned home, he had come with them. It made sense, of course...he had nowhere else to go, and he was as much a part of her crew as the others. It just felt..a little odd, that was all. He looks and acts so much like Mwu, that sometimes it's very easy to forget that he isn't Mwu. I still don't really know how to act around him. He's my friend, I know that, but sometimes I just want to hold him close...to be with him, and I can't.
Lost in her own thoughts, Murrue sighed a little, thin fingers playing with the china cup her friend had given her, the steam rising from the fragrant coffee it contained. The light sea breeze blew across the tiny garden, causing her dark hair to flutter, but she hardly noticed it, her attention focused inward. Noticing this, her friend leaned forward and placed a kind hand on her shoulder, snapping her from her daydream.
"Don't worry so much. He might not remember, but he does care about you.."
Flushing, she stared back into her cup of coffee. "I..."
Andrew smiled, but the expression was a little sad. He'd seen him, of course, the man who looked so like Commander La Fllaga, yet wasn't him, and he could well understand how confused Captain - no, Miss Ramius must be. It was clear that she was still very much in love with La Fllaga, and Colonel Lorrnoke's presence both lightened her heart - and weighed it down. And if she knew how Andrew himself felt about her...it would only make things harder for her. He did want to tell her, to perhaps cure the loneliness they both still felt, but he had the feeling that the one for Miss Ramius wouldn't be him. It hurts, but I need to sit back and let this play out. It's clear by the way Lorrnoke looks at her that he loves her...
"How's he coping with life here?" he asked idly, knowing smile curving his lips as Miss Ramius' blush deepened.
"H-he seems to be all right," she murmured, tucking a lock of auburn hair behind one ear. "Cagalli-san found him a place to live, and he's working as a test pilot for the military..." She smiled a little, setting her cup down, and focused an amber gaze on the horizon. She remembered the delight on his handsome face as he'd caught his first proper glimpse of the country that had become his new home. They'd been standing on the outer deck as Archangel had arrived back in Orb a few days ago...
"Is that it?" he asked, azure eyes wide in fascination. "I didn't get to see it much the last time. It really is beautiful.." He leaned forward on the deck railing to gaze at the island nation, a happy smile on his scarred face. He looked so handsome in that moment, that Murrue found herself glancing away, her own face burning. Stop that. You know he's not Mwu... But she couldn't stop her heart from fluttering whenever she looked at him. It's just because he looks like him, that's all...
"What's wrong?" he asked, looking up at her, his familiar-but-not-familiar face expressing concern. "Are you all right?"
"Y-yes.." she murmured, hating how her voice stuttered. "Thank you, I'm fine.." He smiled, obviously relieved. "That's good.." He stood up straight and stretched, his long blonde hair blowing back in the breeze..and she couldn't help but smile back.
"So...can you help me?" he asked, attention still focused on his new home. "Once we've settled in a bit, will you show me around?"
Blushing again without knowing why, all she could do was nod.
"He wants to go exploring," Murrue said softly. "He asked me if I would show him around..." Hearing Andrew's laughter, she glanced back at him in surprise. "What is it?"
"He asked you out," remarked her friend. "He could have asked anyone to show him around, taken a tour bus, or even explored on his own..but he asked you, because he wants to be with you.." The young woman nodded, knowing her face must be crimson. She'd known. His hopeful smile when he'd asked her, the light in his blue eyes...his idea of 'exploring' had been 'look around a bit while out together'...but she hadn't turned him down.
Sighing, she leaned back on the small garden chair, gazing up at the brilliant blue sky. I wanted this, probably as much as I didn't want it. I want to keep my heart only for Mwu, keep it locked away where no-one else can find it...but that same heart is telling me that the Colonel is Mwu...he just doesn't remember it. I want to keep my distance, but the more I try to stay away, the more I'm drawn to him...
A few days later, her cellphone rang early in the morning. The shrill sound jarred her from a comfortable sleep, and she groaned, fumbling blindly for the metallic object on the nightstand.
"...hello?"
"Good morning!" The voice was cheerful, sunny...and instantly familiar.
"Colonel? How did you get my number?"
He didn't answer that, just chuckled, the merry sound bringing back dozens of memories. Closing her eyes, Murrue flopped back onto her pillows, gazing up at the ceiling. The clock by the bedside read 7.30 AM...and it was the weekend. That part of him certainly wasn't like Mwu...
"Are you free today?" he asked, a note of hope in his voice. "Cause...I was thinking that maybe we could go out exploring today. In the city..."
"Sure," she replied, stifling a yawn. "That sounds okay. Where do you want to meet? There's a clock tower in the main city square, how about there?"
"That sounds good. I'll meet you there!" There was a 'click' as he hung up, and she sighed...then giggled. Impatient as always. Stretching out, she climbed from her bed and made her way to the shower, humming gently to herself. Despite herself, she'd been looking forward to this day ever since they'd come home.
The city was hot and crowded, and as Murrue made her way through the streets, she bought a vanilla ice-cream cone, happily nibbling on the frozen treat. How long had it been since she'd let herself enjoy something as simple as this? Just having a day out in her adopted home city, spending the time with ice-cream...and friends. Smiling, she shook her head, stretching out her arms. Silly, but wasn't that what they'd gone back to fight for? Just to have the chance to live a peaceful life?
"Cap - Murrue-san!" The voice was friendly and familiar, and the young woman turned to see Miriallia Haww running towards her, bag blown out behind her in the wind. "Miriallia-san! How are you?"
"Just fine," replied the girl, falling into step beside her older friend. "Just shopping. What about you?"
"Me? I'm here...to meet someone," Murrue said softly, cheeks tinged a soft rose. Miriallia-san was instantly suspicious, just as Murrue had known she would be.
"Meeting someone? Who cou...wait. I know who it is.." The girl's grin grew sly. "Let me guess. He's blonde, stands about this tall.." (she stood up on her tiptoes and held up a hand above her head) "he has blue eyes, and a scar right across his nose. How close am I?"
Murrue's blush deepened. "I..well...I..."
Miriallia-san laughed in delight. "You're dating him!"
"N-no! It's nothing like that!" protested the older woman, knowing full well her face must be crimson by now. "H-he asked me to show him around, that's all. He's never lived anywhere like this before...or at least, he doesn't remember it. I just wanted to help him, that's all..."
Miriallia clearly wasn't convinced. "That might be what he told you, but I don't buy it. The Colonel..his mind might not remember you, but his heart does. He didn't ask you to show him the city, he asked you out on a date." And not one of Murrue's protests would change her mind. When they reached the clock tower, Miriallia took her leave of Murrue, whispering in her ear, "Have fun.."
And there he was. Sitting on a bench, long blonde hair drifting in the breeze, wearing a blue shirt to match those eyes which were alight with childlike curiosity...and he looked so handsome, that Murrue found herself ducking around a corner and simply peeking at him, enjoying the guilty pleasure of watching him.
"Hello," he said softly without turning around. "I'm glad you're here. I wasn't sure if you'd turn up.." Her eyes widened. How...did he know I was here? Sighing, she swallowed her nervousness, and stepped out of her hiding place, gingerly sitting down beside him. The Colonel smiled gently, clearly pleased she was there.
"You...look nice," he murmured, sounding almost shy. "That colour suits you.." Murrue blushed, gaze fixed on her sandalled feet. She'd picked out the red blouse that morning...remembering people telling her that it was her colour. Despite her embarrassment, she'd wanted to look good for him. She'd wanted him to notice her...
"T-thank you.." she said, voice barely above a whisper. "Shall we go? There's a lot to see.."
They spent the day together in the city, walking side-by-side through the busy streets. The Colonel's scarred face wore a happy smile as he learned about his new home, and Murrue found herself smiling too, his enthusiasm contagious. She pointed out the various landmarks: the seat of government, the island of Onogoro where the Morgenroete facility was located, the park in the centre of the city...everything a tourist would want to see. But it seemed as though he was waiting for something else, and her suspicions were confirmed when he turned to her with a smile.
"Okay, now I've seen where everyone else likes to go. But where do you like to go? What's your favourite place?"
She sighed, but smiled, turning down a quiet alleyway a short way up the street, into a small courtyard. A fountain played in the centre, sending jets of water dancing in the hot air, and a few people milled about, ice-creams in their hands. The Colonel smiled again. "This is nice. Do you come here a lot?"
Nodding, Murrue led him to the ice-cream vendor, buying two vanilla cones with chocolate fudge syrup. The blonde man blinked in surprise as she handed him one of the cones, and he peered at it. "What's this?"
"Ice-cream," she replied softly, nibbling at her own cone. He doesn't remember ice-cream? What kind of a life has he had? "Go on, eat it. It's nice.."
Hesitantly, he licked the ice-cream...and a broad delighted smile spread over his face. He didn't say anything...he didn't have to. Happily, he sat down on the edge of the fountain and quickly devoured the treat, only looking up when he heard her laughing. He was taken aback for a moment, then he too started laughing, the merry chuckle filling the quiet courtyard. The other people there turned to watch them in confusion, these two people laughing at nothing - these two people rediscovering happiness.
"I never heard you laugh before," he said later. After their walk around the city, he had decided to go walk along the beach. He walked barefoot, toes sinking into the sand...and Murrue had never seen him happier. This life, this peace...perhaps he deserved it more than any of them, because he'd never known what it was like. At his words, she smiled a little, slipping off her sandals.
"I wasn't too happy before," she replied, hoping he'd leave it at that, but knowing he wouldn't.
"You've been very lonely, haven't you?" he asked softly, blonde hair blowing across his face. She didn't answer for a moment, instead listening to the cry of the sea birds. Then finally, she nodded.
"Yes," she answered, amber gaze fixed on the white sand. "I have. But so have you."
"But maybe neither of us has to be anymore," he said, moving around to face her. His smile was gentle and kind, and Murrue found herself blushing again. Reaching out, he took one of her hands between both of his.
"We've both been lonely...but now we have each other. You're my best friend, and I'd like...for you to be more than that, but I won't ever force you. I just..."
She closed her eyes, trying to stop the tears from welling up. Her heart was racing, her head spinning...and she didn't know how to answer. "I...I don't know," she finally whispered, a single tear sliding down a flushed cheek. "Please...I..."
"You need time?" he asked softly, and she nodded, hiccupping slightly. "Take all the time you need. I'll still be here. And whatever you choose, I'll be happy with it, okay?"
"Okay.." she replied shakily, glancing up when he gently brushed away the tears from her face. He was smiling still, and the expression reminded her so much of Mwu that she couldn't help crying again, letting him pull her into his embrace and hold her close.
You're not Mwu, and I've almost accepted that I'm never going to see him again. But that doesn't hurt as much as I thought it would.
Because I think...I'm falling in love with you...
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
( :scuffs toe on floor: It okay?
Please read and review! )
