Chapter TWO
"May I speak to the Queen in private Alice?" The Hatter had difficulty keeping his voice even.
"Oh, why of course." She smiled brightly.
The Hatter could feel himself becoming weak in the knees, what was this woman doing to him? The Queen took him to a secluded room and shut the door behind them. The Hatter turned to face her, knowing exactly what he was going to say and how he was to say it. He was going to let her know just how angry he was with her and just let it all out.
"Your majesty, I…" The passion was gone and he collapsed into a chair.
"I know this was not what you were expecting but you said you trusted me and this is what is best for you. Why are you acting so harshly to her."
"Pardon my French dear but, where in the hell did you get the damn idea that bringing her back here was a good idea?! That was not what I asked for! I asked for a cure so I wouldn't have to deal with this."
"So you could ignore your feelings?! Not in my kingdom sir. You will thank me for this later."
"Thank you!? For making things worse? I didn't want her in my life I wanted to forget about her and all the trouble she brought me. Might I remind you that I nearly lost my head trying to protect her the last time she was here? I wanted things to easier and that did not mean bringing her here."
"You'll thank me one day." With that she turned and left.
The Hatter wasn't sure what to do with himself he walked across the room to a mirror.
Stunning green eyes, vibrant orange hair, rather charming (although crooked) smile. The Hatter saw another dangerous trait.
Doubt.
Should he tell Alice of his feelings? Keep them hidden? What would he say how would he say it? All the questions ran through his mind and he didn't know which to answer first. He found himself unconsciously fixing his hair and straightening his bowtie. Why was he doing this? He didn't care, he shouldn't care. Love. Hate. Doubt. Worst case scenarios played in his head like a bad film he couldn't get his money back for. Would she leave again? Would she hate him? Would she laugh at him? The scariest scene his mind could conjure up was one where she returned his love. What would happen then? With a tight ball in his stomach he left or tried to leave his fears behind and rejoined the party happening about him.
Muttering under his breath he tried to work up some self-confidence, "Just walk straight up to her and tell her. No just ignore it. Be kind. I should leave. No I should stay."
He looked around for his dear Alice and couldn't find her anywhere. This was sign he should go home. Go home and become a hermit. No. Go home and be himself. Go home and be The Mad Hatter. He couldn't do this with Alice always about and being in his business and his work. His work! She has already ruined that for him he has not made a hat in months. A hatter who doesn't make hats. It was decided. Alice was never going to be a part of his future here in wonderland. She was not his problem. After making this quite clear to himself he turned for the door and was stopped dead in his tracks. Alice. She was standing by the door talking to a royal guardsmen. Alice. So beautiful, so elegant, so…so…so not his problem. He forced himself to stop thinking of her in such a manner and marched right up to the door to leave. He was pulled back with a gentle tug.
"Sir, I didn't get your name." Alice, said sweetly.
"Don't play a fool my dear, you know who I am." What was she thinking that he was that easily confused? He looked long and hard at her and saw that his words hurt her. They hurt her. Why would they do that? Why would he do that? His thoughts sprinted through his mind faster than a cheetah after its prey. When they all made it to the finish line the Hatter picked up the pieces. The realization made him weak. All of the worst case scenarios his mad mind had come up with had not prepared him for this.
"Tarrant. My name is Tarrant." The Hatter said as he walked into the night still in a haze.
Alice. His dear, sweet, beautiful Alice. Could it be true? Not even his darkest imagination could have create this horrid reality. Alice, his Alice, doesn't even remember him. Did the White Queen know? If she did why would she do this?
He left the party and just started walking in whichever direction his feet led him. It was dark outside and he knew this decision was dangerous but who cared? He didn't. His feet trudged on and he slowed his mind down to the point nothing was happening. He might as well have been dead. But his feet still moved. The moon was at its highest point pouring dim light onto the world below. Was this the same moon Alice saw in her home? Did she have a moon? Was she the moon? How old was Alice? In his world she was quite young. Maybe 23. 24? Basically still a child. And he. Why he was not that much older than she was. He was nearing his 28th birthday. Why in fact today was his unbirthday basically any day that wasn't his actual birthday. Was it Alice's unbirthday as well? Did they have this in common? Would she even remember when her unbirthday was?!
That damn White Queen how could she do this to him? He had trusted her.
His mind started to drift to Alice's mesmerizing smile. She had come up to him. She had initiated the encounter. What did that mean? Why did she care what his name was?
Why did he give her THAT name? What was he thinking? That awful name. The name that only brings back bad memories of past lovers who only brought pain. What did he ever see in her? Besides her big head. That glorious head of hers. Oh the hats he made! Hundreds. Thousands. Giant hats that only she could wear. Bright colors and outrageous materials. He still obsessed over her head because while the face painted on it wasn't grand the head itself was marvelous. His feet had finally stopped. It was midday. Where had the time gone? Time. He laughed at his naïve concept of time in Wonderland. He took this moment to see where he had ended up in his night long journey only to find he was back where he had started.
The White Queen's Castle.
