Hatchet stood in the middle of the foyer. The challenge had just begun and the others had all left to find a soda that would determine the teams.
"Welcome back," Hatchet greeted. "If you're watching this, it means you're good at following instructions. Excellent work, soldier. Now, I just sent the twenty houseguests to look through the house for cans of soda as part of their first challenge. Let's see how they're doin'."
Loud snoring could be heard off to the side. Hatchet glanced to his right to see Ernie napping on one of the couches.
"ERNIE! What are you doing?" Hatchet barked.
There was no response, simply Ernie's snoring.
"I give up," Hatchet said as he shook his head.
Confessional:
Ernie: I knew what I was doing. I may be lazy, but I'm not, you know, dumb. I know when to put actual, like, effort into things, and this was not one of those times, you know?
Franklin, Susan, and Bailey were on the second floor, searching through the halls for a can of soda.
"Oh, I hope we end up on the same team," Susan said excitedly. "Maybe we could make the final three!"
"That'd be nice, but try not to look too far ahead," Franklin smiled. "That's a long time from now. First we have to focus on the challenge."
"…He's right…" Bailey agreed.
"I know. I'm just so excited!" Susan squealed. "Hey! I see one! I see one!" Susan dashed forward, only to trip and fall face-first. "I'm okay!"
Franklin walked ahead and took the soda, which was placed next to a potted plant. He walked back to Susan, who was now up off the floor and dusting herself off, and handed it to her.
"Oh, thank you," Susan smiled.
"I figured since you found it it's only fair that you get to keep it," Franklin said.
"Cool! I'm gonna help you guys find your sodas too,"
"That'd be nice. Thanks."
Confessional:
Susan: Franklin's only the hottest guy alive! I don't care if he has only one eye; that just makes him look like an action hero! Plus, he's so sweet. I think I've found my love interest!
Franklin: Susan certainly is energetic, I'll give her that. She seems like she could be a loyal friend, which is nice.
Bailey: (she is reading from a paper) Susan and Franklin seem to be getting rather close. I fear that my extreme social awkwardness may reduce me to become the third wheel in the friendship. I just hope that isn't the case.
CJ and Nolan were currently searching through the mansion's rec room. Actually, to be more accurate, Nolan was searching while CJ sat in a beanbag chair waiting for him.
"I realize you don't want to be here, but the least you could do is help me out," Nolan said.
"I don't owe you anything. You're the one who decided to make me your ally," CJ told him.
"Yeah, but you're the one who decided to follow me to the rec room," Nolan pointed out.
CJ paused. "…Well I figured I might as well beat my high score in darts before I left," she said.
"You're not even playing darts," Nolan said as he found a soda. "Here. You can have this one."
CJ took the soda. "Fine. But only because the sooner this challenge ends, the sooner I can leave."
"That's fine. Now follow me. We're going to the…" Nolan rolled his die. "Attic."
"Fine, but don't expect me to help you there either," CJ told him.
"At this point it'd surprise me if you did help me," Nolan said dryly.
Confessional:
Nolan: Part of my self-imposed dice challenge is that I change my personality every time I enter another room. In the rec room, I was the deadpan cynic. I could also be the peppy cheerful guy, the absolute dick, the strategist, and more.
CJ: I wonder if Nolan is fed up with me yet.
Jilly, Kiki, Lauren, and Spankety were currently looking through the basement for any sodas.
"Man, this place is WEAK," Jilly said. "The lights aren't even colored and I don't see a SINGLE speaker!"
"We should have a dance party after the challenge! That'll cheer you up, I'm sure of it!" Spankety suggested.
"Hell yeah!" Jilly exclaimed.
"Okay guys, I think it's time to talk strategy," Kiki said.
"Aw, but we were talking about dance parties," Spankety said.
"We can have a dance party, but this is kind of important," Kiki said. "I called the four of you to participate in the challenge with me because I need an alliance."
"What if we don't end up on the same team though?" Lauren asked.
"That's a risk I'm willing to take. But each team will have a maximum of seven people. Worst case scenario, one of us ends up on a team of six, one of us ends up on a team of seven, and the other two end up on the other team of seven. Even if that happens, it's good to stick together." Kiki explained.
"You're awful talkative. I don't remember you talking once before this," Lauren said.
"Well, there's a reason for that," Kiki said. "I'm… androphobic."
"That's okay. Lots of people are scared of robots," Spankety said comfortingly.
"It means I'm afraid of men. I'd rather not get into it, but let's just say I tend to freeze up around men. I have a hard time talking around them and I can't talk directly to them, period. That's why I'm forming an all-girls alliance. Are you in?" Kiki asked.
"Yeah, that sounds DOPE! Your girl DJ Fuchsia is IN!" Jilly said.
"That's such a sad story," Spankety said with concern. "If it'll make you happy, I'd love to join your alliance!"
"So, you're afraid of guys, huh?" Lauren asked. "I don't suppose that means you're willing to spend seven minutes in heaven in exchange for my loyalty?"
"No. I still like guys, I just… can't do anything about it. It's a struggle," Kiki said sheepishly.
"Whoa, that sucks. How do you cope with that?" Lauren asked.
"I won't answer that question," Kiki said as she found a can of soda. "Come on, I found a soda. I doubt there'd be more than one in here."
Confessional:
Kiki: Yes, I'm afraid of men. Between you and me, that's probably the main thing keeping me from winning this game. But if I can eliminate all the men in my team, that should make things a bit easier for me.
Spankety: Poor Kiki! I wonder what it's like being afraid of so many people. It's probably really terrifying. I feel so bad for her. I have to make her smile now!
Lauren: Kiki better be willing to put out, because there's no way I'm associating myself with that clown freak without a little something-something in return. Still, if she won't do it, then it's her own fault if it bites her in the butt later.
Barry and Erica were looking through the dining room for a soda.
"So, why did you follow me here?" Erica asked. "It can't be for my good looks."
"Well no one else seemed to be going with you, and I figured you'd like some company," Barry said.
"Do I look like I want company?" Erica asked harshly.
"No, but oftentimes the ones who say they don't want company want it most of all," Barry said solemnly.
"…What do you want?" Erica asked in confusion.
"I want you to tell me about yourself. What are your hobbies? What are your dreams? What's your favorite movie? That kind of thing," Barry smiled.
"Why do you care?" Erica asked.
"Because I want to learn more about my new friend."
Erica found a can of soda under one of the chairs. She dashed out of the dining room as soon as Barry's back was turned.
Confessional:
Erica: What is Barry's problem? How dare he act like a friend to me? How dare he make me feel special by asking about me as a person? (she is blushing) What an asshole!
Barry: I couldn't find a soda in the dining room, and Erica seemed to have left when I wasn't looking, so maybe she found it, and she didn't realize that I didn't see her find it. Oh well. I'm sure we'll run into each other soon.
David, Mac, and Tucker were now searching in the mansion's gym.
"So, are the ladies here smoking or what?" Tucker asked.
"Totally. I think that Rachel girl has it hot for me," David smirked.
"I may or may not have someone in mind. That's all I'm saying," Mac smiled.
"Come on, man. You gotta tell us!" David coaxed.
"Yeah. If you're not careful Tucker could hook up with her," Tucker said as he moved his eyebrows up and down. "Wouldn't want to hurt any feelings now."
"I thought Mac liked to get hurt," David chuckled.
"Physical pain, sure, but emotional pain is something else," Mac said. "I'd sooner have all my limbs broken than my heart broken."
"Hey, you're the one not saying who it is," Tucker said. "If Tucker ends up with her, you only have yourself to blame." Tucker found a soda in one of the lockers. "Score! Come on, let's go find some more." Tucker left the room.
"I wouldn't worry about him, dude," David said to Mac. "Something tells me he's not exactly topping any hot lists."
"You're right. And if he does end up with her, I can give him a black eye or three and we'll call it even. Heeheehahaha!" Mac laughed.
Confessional:
Tucker: Tucker is a ladies' man. When Tucker isn't pulling pranks on unsuspecting victims, he's scoping out the hot chicks. Tucker doesn't know who it is Mac likes, but he better act fast before she inevitably falls for Tucker. Heheh.
Mac: I'm not sure I like Tucker too much. But if he keeps bugging me, I'm not afraid to get into a fight. And if he does go out with her, I can fight for her honor. So that's cool! Heeheehahaha!
David: …Wait, three black eyes?
Preston, Rachel, and Ziggy were checking each of the first-place rooms for a soda.
"So, any of you boys find a soda yet?" Rachel asked.
"Nope, nothing," Ziggy replied.
"I can tell you that there are two sodas in this general area. They are in different rooms as well," Preston said.
"How do you know that?" Ziggy asked.
"I saw it in Yolonda's body language," Preston shrugged. "It was nothing."
"You're so smart, Preston," Rachel said.
"I try," Preston said as he found a can of soda in one of the trash bins. "I found this one. There should be one more in the first-place area."
"Do you think there's one in Chef's room?" Ziggy asked.
"I doubt it. Chef said we're not allowed in there, and they wouldn't make a soda unreachable," Preston deduced. "It's likely in one of the rooms on the other end of the hall. Let's go."
"You really know what you're doing," Rachel flirted.
Confessional:
Preston: I know Rachel's flirtation is all an act. Clearly she's trying to be the puppet master in this game. Sorry, hun, but that role's already been taken by one Preston Nguyen. Maybe next time. As for Ziggy, he's not even worth worrying about.
Rachel: I'm not sure I'm getting through to Preston. Maybe he's too smart to fall for it. I'll have to find someone more naïve to wrap around my finger.
Chappy and Judy were currently in the backyard looking for a soda to win the challenge.
"So, Chappy, why do you like winning so much? I'm curious," Judy said.
"Does there need to be a reason? Everyone likes to win and everyone hates to lose. I'm no different," Chappy said.
"You do seem a bit different," Judy chuckled.
"Alright, yeah, I may like to win more than most people, but only because I do NOT like losing. Just like how we are NOT losing this challenge and we are NOT losing any challenges in the future."
"But what if we end up on different teams?" Judy asked. "How can we work together then?"
"Then you throw all the challenges so I can win them all," Chappy said as if it was nothing.
"That doesn't sound necessarily fair to me," Judy said patiently.
"Life's not fair. Deal with it," Chappy said as he found a can of soda hiding under an inflatable pool toy. "Well, I've won this challenge. I'm out," Chappy left Judy in the backyard as he returned indoors.
Judy sighed, rolled her eyes, and shook her head.
Confessional:
Chappy: Winning is everything. If Judy knows what's good for her, she will keep her promise and help me win all the challenges.
Judy: Chappy really needs to learn that the world does not revolve around him. Maybe I can be of some help. Maybe I can teach him that winning isn't everything. It certainly won't be easy, but Chappy's a friend… kind of. Anyway, I'm willing to help.
Bailey, Franklin, and Susan continued wandering the halls in search of a soda.
"Oh, I want to drink this so bad," Susan pouted as she held her soda can.
"I know, but you have to wait. You don't want to drink it now before Mr. Hatchet tells us which flavor goes to which team," Franklin told her.
"I know… but it's haaaaaaard! Here, Bailey, you take this one." Susan handed her soda to Bailey.
"…Um, okay…" Bailey took the soda from Susan.
"I don't think you need the caffeine anyway," Franklin joked.
"Yeaaaaaah, you're probably right," Susan admitted. "I am rather energetic, aren't I?"
"And then some." Franklin looked up at a chandelier hanging from the ceiling of the intersection of hallways they had reached. "Hey, is that another can of soda?"
"Is it? Where?!" Susan asked as she turned around to face Franklin. She turned around too fast, however, and she slipped and fell on her back. Though Susan wasn't heavy by any means, the force of her fall was enough to dislodge the can of soda from the chandelier – and onto her head.
"You alright?" Franklin asked.
"Just peachy…" Susan said airily as she rubbed her head. "Hey, this means that we almost win, right?"
"Yup. We just have to find one for me now," Franklin said. "Let's roll out."
"Just like Transformers!" Susan said, still in a daze.
Confessional:
Franklin: Susan's energy would be great to have on our team. Bailey doesn't talk much, but I consider her a friend. Maybe I can get her to open up at her own pace. She and Susan seem pretty different, but they're both sweet girls.
Susan: Isn't Franklin the greatest? He and Bailey are great friends. I'm going to love it here, I can tell!
Bailey: (she is reading from a paper) While Susan and Franklin do not seem necessarily disturbed by my presence, I notice that they seem closer to each other than they do to me. I am not surprised by this fact, as I am far from the most talkative person in the house, though it is rather disappointing to feel unincluded. Perhaps I should work to rectify this. (she sighs)
CJ and Nolan were now searching in the attic of the mansion, or, to be more accurate, Nolan was searching as CJ sat upon a cardboard box drawing something in a sketchbook.
"You know, CJ, even though you're not really helping, just having you here is lifting my spirits tenfold," Nolan said cheerfully.
"Why did you have to roll a one?" CJ asked. "Would it kill you to not follow the dice when they make you do something annoying?"
"No, but that would defeat the purpose of a self-imposed challenge," Nolan told her.
"Why would you give yourself an extra challenge? This game seems complicated enough as it is," CJ inquired.
"Well there are two reasons. For one, I'm a risk taker. A gambler you might say. I have lots of fun playing cards and rolling dice and keeping myself guessing. The other reason is, well, I honestly don't think I'm going to win, so I'm gonna have as much fun as I can while I am here by adding some extra challenge."
"You're crazy, you know that?" CJ remarked.
"Thank you!" Nolan smiled. "Hey, I found one for you!" Nolan handed CJ a can of soda.
"Great. Can we go back to the foyer? It's a lot less dusty there."
"No problemo!"
Confessional:
CJ: I don't get Nolan. Like, who is he really? I feel like he's just trying out different personalities to make himself feel special. That sounds like something a preteen girl would do if you ask me.
Nolan: I can be myself when I'm in the confessional. And as myself, I have to say, I'm glad I picked CJ as an ally; or should I say I'm glad the dice picked CJ. She's pretty funny, and her sarcastic one-liners are good for morale.
Jilly, Kiki, Lauren, and Spankety had split up to search the front yard, as it was quite expansive. Kiki and Spankety took the east half of the gardens, and Jilly and Lauren took the west half. We now check Kiki and Spankety.
"So, Spankety, is that your real name?" Kiki asked.
"Heehee. Nope! It's a nickname. My real name doesn't sound all that clownish, so I came up with this one." Spankety explained.
"What's your real name?" Kiki asked curiously.
"Not telling! Heehee." Spankety giggled.
"Alright then." There was a pause. "Clowns carry seltzer around, right? Do you think that'll count as a soda for the challenge?" Kiki asked rhetorically.
"I don't think so. Mr. Hatchet said the flavor of the soda would determine what team we're on. My seltzer doesn't taste like anything, really. Sorry," Spankety apologized. "But if it makes you feel any better, I think I see a real soda right there!"
"Really?" Kiki asked. She turned her attention to where Spankety pointed. Sure enough, there was a can of soda sitting in the trunk of an elephant-shaped hedge. "How are we going to get it down though?"
"No worries. A clown always has a few tricks up her sleeve!" Spankety removed her hat and tossed it like a boomerang at the can of soda. The hat connected with the can and knocked it off the hedge and into Spankety's hand. Spankety smiled as her hat landed back upon her head.
"…I'm not questioning it," Kiki shrugged.
Confessional:
Kiki: Spankety will definitely be a helpful member of my alliance. Hopefully we do end up on the same team. It sure would suck if we somehow got separated. (she facepalms) I'm just tempting fate, aren't I?
Spankety: I'm helpful!
Jilly and Lauren, meanwhile, searched the western side of the front yard gardens. They were currently stuck in a hedge maze.
"You don't think they'd really hide a soda in here, do you?" Lauren asked.
"I dunno, man, but it's way too bright out here," Jilly said. "Your girl's more of an indoor type of person, you know? Even with these killer shades, it's like, geez, man! Calm yourself, sun!"
"So basically you're useless right about now?" Lauren asked.
"Naw way, man! I'm totally leading a trail back to the start of the maze!" Jilly gestured behind her at the glowsticks she'd placed on the ground.
"Wow. That's actually pretty smart," Lauren admitted.
"Hey, by the way, just to be sure, you're not gonna try any funny business in here are you?" Jilly asked.
"I'm not going to kill you if that's what you're asking," Lauren replied.
"Naw, man, I mean, you know, because of the thing… were you don't just like guys and stuff. You know what I'm saying." Jilly scratched the back of her head.
"No, no, don't worry. I may have an overactive libido, or whatever that doctor said, but you're my friend and I know how to respect boundaries. Word of warning, though: all bets are off when I'm on my period."
"Uh, yeah. Got it," Jilly winced.
"Alright, you want to hear the good news or the bad news first?" Lauren asked.
"Uh, bad news?"
"The bad news is we have to head back."
"Well what's the good news?"
Lauren showed Jilly the can of soda she found.
"Aw, sickness!" Jilly cheered. "Let's go check on the others."
"Good call," Lauren agreed.
Confessional:
Lauren: Jilly's a bit over-the-top, but she's probably my best friend so far. She's certainly not making it easy for me with that revealing outfit, but like I said, I can respect my friends' boundaries. Let's be honest though, if she weren't already my friend, I'd definitely have tried some funny business in that hedge maze. (she snickers)
Jilly: It's good to know Lauren's got my back, you know? I think we could make the final two. Just sayin'.
Barry wandered through the halls by himself when he saw Judy just across the hall.
"Oh, hey! Judy!" Barry called.
"Hey. Sorry, I didn't catch your name," Judy said.
"I'm Barry Flynn. My partner actually left me behind a little bit ago. You want to team up?"
"Totally. In fact, the same thing happened to me. But where are my manners? Judy Janine Jones, at your service."
"Cool. So, Judy, what's your story?" Barry asked.
"Well back home I'm kind of famous at my school for being sort of, kind of, really good at sports. I'm in all the sports teams and I play a key role in each team," Judy explained. "I don't like to brag, but I do have a number of fans at school. Though nobody asked me to homecoming last year. I was disappointed."
"I bet they all think you're way out of their league," Barry smiled.
"Oh, stop," Judy scolded playfully.
All of a sudden the two found themselves at a dead end with a giant painting of Chris hanging on the wall.
"Seriously? Who builds a dead end into a house?" Judy chuckled.
"Someone who likes hanging pictures of themselves I guess," Barry shrugged. "Almost makes me wonder if there's a secret behind that abnormally large painting."
"Yeah, that would be funny," Judy agreed as the two left the dead end.
…
…
"You know, it probably wouldn't hurt to check," Barry said as he and Judy returned to the painting. Barry moved the painting aside to reveal a hidden compartment with a can of soda in it.
"Nice! Good call, man," Judy complimented.
"Thanks," Barry said as he took the soda and handed it to Judy.
Confessional:
Barry: Even though Erica left me, I lucked out in running across Judy. It's great to make new friends, and Judy seems like a really sweet gal.
Judy: Barry's really cool. Maybe if he and Chappy end up on the same team as me, Barry could help me help Chappy with his whole winning obsession. That'd be cool.
David, Mac, and Tucker were now searching the bathroom for a soda. Tucker seemed to have a mischievous look on his face.
"What are you planning, dude?" David asked Tucker.
"Oh, just wondering if Tucker could make a peephole to look at the hot chicks taking a shower. Hey, who do you guys think is hotter: Lauren, Rachel, or Judy? Tucker can't decide on who's the hottest."
"Er, you do realize we're talking about actual people, right? Not baseball cards," Mac pointed out.
"Well duh. Baseball cards aren't hot. Not even the ones with chicks on them," Tucker said.
"I'm just saying. How would you like it if a girl said you were the less attractive than another guy?" Mac said.
"Are you insinuating that Tucker is ugly?" Tucker asked, angry.
"And what if I am?" Mac smirked.
"You want to fight?" Tucker asked Mac as he handed his soda to David and cracked his knuckles.
"Ladies first," Mac grinned as he held up his fists.
The two began to trade blows, though Mac, being taller and more physically fit, had the clearer advantage. Tucker could barely get a punch in before he ended up lying on the floor with a bloody nose and a black eye.
"You mother *bleep*er!" Tucker shouted. "Tucker won't forget this! Your ass is grass, and Tucker is the lawnmower!"
"Dude, that was intense!" David hi-fived Mac. "Check it out: I found this while you guys were fighting." David showed Mac a can of soda that he'd found.
"Excellent! Heeheehahaha!" Mac laughed. "Oh MAN do I feel good! That fight really got me pumped. The pain! The pain! It's amazing!" Mac took Tucker's soda from David and the two left.
"No! You can't do this to Tucker!" Tucker called. "Tucker will have his revenge!"
Confessional:
Mac: Oh man, that was AWESOME! Tucker got messed up, man! He was all "You wanna fight" and I was all "Bring it on" and next thing I know he's lying on the ground in total pain! Heeheehahaha!
David: Whoa, dude. Mac is intense. I'm definitely glad he's on my side, or I'd be in huge trouble, man.
Tucker: You may have won the battle… Mac… but TUCKER… will win… the WAR!
Preston, Rachel, and Ziggy were now in the spa area of the mansion. They had found their second soda in the first-place rooms and only needed one more.
"You know, Preston, I bet you could easily find all the sodas in this whole house," Rachel said.
"It's possible. But for the sake of the challenge we only need three, so three we shall find," Preston said.
"I didn't know this place had a spa," Ziggy said.
"Apparently so. It looks like there's even a sauna in here too," Rachel said with a wink. "I wonder if towels are required in the sauna."
"I'd play it safe and assume so," Ziggy said.
"Ooh, good call, Ziggy," Rachel said with a smile.
"Hm, perhaps the soda's in the sauna," Preston pondered.
"Oh, I'd be more than happy to check," Rachel said as she went for the door.
"You're going to go in fully clothed?" Ziggy asked.
"Well, if you boys want me to strip naked first, I'd be fine with that," Rachel giggled.
"That won't be necessary. Please, the soda," Preston said impatiently.
"Okay then," Rachel said as she went into the sauna.
"She seems alright," Ziggy said to Preston.
"Between you and me, I think her flirtation is all an act," Preston said. "Try not to fall for it."
"I'll keep that in mind," Ziggy said.
Just then Rachel walked out of the sauna with a can of soda in hand.
"Boy, it sure is steamy in there. You boys should join me in there sometime," Rachel said.
"Well, for now we should return to the foyer. We've finished this challenge," Preston said as he, Ziggy, and Rachel left for the foyer.
Confessional:
Preston: I do hope Rachel and I are on the same team, because I want her gone sooner than later. Of course, if she isn't on my team, I can work around that. Just plant some seeds of suspicion in the minds of her teammates, sit back, and watch the fireworks.
Rachel: Even if they aren't falling for it, it's still a good idea to keep up the façade. I'd rather not have them telling everyone I'm a phony and I end up being kicked off because of it. Not exactly my cup of tea. Actually, my cup of tea is earl grey.
Ernie continued to nap on the couch in the foyer. He, CJ, Nolan, Chappy, Erica, Kiki, Spankety, Mac, David, and Hatchet were all there as well.
"Has he been asleep this entire challenge?" David asked as he gestured to Ernie.
"Yup. If he doesn't find himself a soda soon I think I'll kick him out right now!" Hatchet said.
Just then, Preston, Rachel, and Ziggy arrived in the foyer, each with a soda.
"Alright, that's twelve people in the foyer with a soda!" Hatchet announced. "Eight more to go!"
"Can I at least drink my soda now?" Erica asked. "I'm thirsty."
"Nope. You gotta wait 'till everyone's here!" Hatchet told her.
"Ugh. It's because I'm a freak, isn't it? You need to check your privilege," Erica scoffed.
"I'm not even going to pretend like I care what that means," Hatchet told her.
Confessional:
Ernie: Faking being asleep is great because you get to, like, overhear conversations that people don't think you're listening to because, ya know, they think you're asleep. You learn a lot of stuff you, uh, wouldn't normally find out that way.
Bailey, Franklin, and Susan were now on the balcony that overlooked the backyard. The balcony had five chairs surrounding a circular table.
"This is a nice balcony," Franklin said. "I like this table. It reminds me of poker night at… back home."
"Nolan brought dice with him. Maybe he has cards too! That'd be cool!" Susan said excitedly.
"Maybe. I'll have to ask him about that later. Assuming he doesn't get voted out tonight, that is," Franklin thought aloud.
"…Um… Hatchet said… um… there isn't… going… to be… um… an elimination… um… tonight,"
Bailey reminded him.
"Ah, that's right. Thanks Bailey. It's good to have you around," Franklin smiled.
"OW!" Susan yelped as she banged her head on the bottom of the table. She had crawled under the table in search of a soda, and as she got up she hit her head.
"Are you alright?" Franklin asked.
"I don't know…" Susan giggled. "But I found a soda pop!" Susan handed Franklin the soda she had found before falling to the floor again.
"Thanks, Susan. You're pretty good at this," Franklin said before realizing she was unconscious. He picked her up and slung her over his shoulder. "Might as well carry her back, for her troubles."
"…Right…" Bailey agreed.
Confessional:
Franklin: I'm not sure how Susan can bear getting hurt as much as she seems to. I have… a bit of an aversion to pain, if the scars and one eye are any indication.
Bailey: (she is reading from a paper) It felt nice to remind Franklin of the lack of an elimination tonight. It may not have been much, but I feel it a necessary step to becoming more of an open person. Perhaps someday I may be able to hold a conversation without needing to preconceive what I have to say. …Like that'll happen…
Jilly and Lauren found themselves in a ballroom in their search for one last soda.
"Dang, now THIS is a party room!" Jilly commented. "I mean, it could do with less chiffon and more glitter, but still. I could see myself throwing a baller party in here."
"Well it is a ballroom," Lauren chuckled. "Though I have to disagree. I think it'd be nice to throw a grand masquerade in a room like this. I may get around, but that doesn't mean I can't appreciate the finer things sometimes."
"Aw, dude, you know what? We should throw a masque-rave!" Jilly said. "Everyone gets dressed up in those froufy outfits with all the feathers and stuff, while people are glowstringing to the sick beats your girl picked out! Yeah!"
"What is 'glowstringing'?" Lauren asked.
"It's so cool. It's when you have two strings with glowsticks on the end and you do tricks and stuff with them. When you glowstring in a dark room, it's like nothing else matters. I'm not that great at it, admittedly, but there's some people on YouTube where it's like… DAYUM!"
"Hey, random question: have you ever done ecstasy?" Lauren asked.
"I don't think I'm legally allowed to answer that question truthfully," Jilly smirked.
"I see," Lauren said. "Holy crap this ballroom is huge. We could look around for half an hour and still not cover all the ground."
"Well that don't matter, because look what your girl just found!" Jilly showed Lauren a can of soda she had found behind a chiffon curtain.
"Great. This challenge is over!" Lauren grinned. "Let's go back."
"Killin' it!" Jilly cheered as she ran for the door.
Confessional:
Jilly: Even though there's no trance music or seizure-inducing lights or nothing, I have to say this party is still pretty sick. After I give it the ol' DJ Fuchsia treatment, it's gonna be off. The. Mother. Effing. CHAIN!
Lauren: I wonder if Jilly will screw me if I get her high on ecstasy. Food for thought.
Barry and Judy were now in what appeared to be an armory, full of swords, lances, axes, bows, and all sorts of medieval weaponry.
"Wow. I like it here!" Judy smiled. "Medieval weaponry has always been a secret passion of mine. I wonder if anyone else here likes them as much as I do."
"Maybe. You'll have to ask around," Barry said.
"Yeah, I probably should. Say, Barry, what are your hobbies?" Judy asked.
"You'll think it's silly," Barry said.
"No I won't. Trust me. I told you my guilty pleasure. What's yours?" Judy asked.
"Well, if you must know…" Barry drew out the silence as long as he could. "I like to take modern pop songs and re-write them with Christian lyrics."
Judy burst into laughter. "That's adorable!"
"No it's not," Barry blushed in embarrassment. "I mean, a lot of good songs these days don't exactly have the cleanest lyrics, so I'm doing my part."
"No, I totally get why you're doing it," Judy said in between giggles. "That's seriously cool. Are they on the internet or something?"
Before Barry could answer, the door busted open. Tucker walked in, and he looked livid.
"Alright, if one of you doesn't give Tucker a soda right now, there will be consequences!" Tucker shouted.
"Tucker, honey, I'm on the wrestling team," Judy said. "If you think you can take me, I'll accept your challenge, but I'm just warning you in advance-"
"Tucker will not be patronized!" Tucker snapped.
Barry managed to find a soda hiding behind a battle axe. "Here. Take this soda," he said as he handed it to Tucker.
"You see? That wasn't so difficult, now was it?" Tucker asked. "Tucker's out of here." Tuckers stomped off.
"Why'd you give him that soda?" Judy asked.
"He looked like he was having a bad day. He had a black eye and I think I saw blood coming from his nose. I figured he could use some kindness," Barry explained.
"Barry, you're one of a kind, let me tell you," Judy said.
Confessional:
Judy: Barry's a sweet guy. He's going to make some girl very happy someday, I can tell you that much right now.
Barry: Why do I get the feeling Judy doesn't take me very seriously? Oh well. As long as we're still friends, that's alright with me.
Everyone but Barry and Judy were now in the foyer. CJ brought a chair up to Ernie and sat next to him.
"We're not so different, you and I," CJ said to him, unaware of the fact that he was listening. "Neither of us really want to do anything as far as challenges go. Heck, I don't even want to be here. Do you want to be here? Well, only one of us can be the first boot, and that's gonna be me. Sorry, you'll have to suffer here a bit longer than I will. I already called dibs on first boot, so you'll have to be patient."
Ernie began to stretch as he yawned and opened his eyes.
"Did you say something?" Ernie asked CJ.
"What? No, I've been silent this entire time," CJ said.
"I can't tell if you're being sarcastic or not," Ernie stated.
"I didn't really say anything important. Don't mind me," CJ told him.
"Got it," Ernie said.
Confessional:
CJ: There is literally only one reason for me to stay here. With that in mind, why keep me around? I'm not going to win any challenges. I'm certainly not going to win the million dollars. I dunno. This game's weird.
Ernie: CJ's weird.
Barry and Judy had now returned to the foyer. Barry had found another soda in the den, so everybody other than Ernie had a soda.
"Alright, Ernie. Unless you can find yourself a soda in the next ten seconds, I'm officially throwing you out of the game!" Hatchet warned.
"Oh, you mean like this?" Ernie asked as he took a can of soda out from behind the pillow he was sleeping on.
"…Was that there the entire time?" David asked.
"Yup. So basically I've been set the entire time while you guys were busting your asses looking for sodas," Ernie said nonchalantly.
"Okay then. With that in mind, it's time for y'all to drink!" Hatchet announced. "Remember, the flavor of soda you get will determine who your teammates are.
The teens all opened their sodas and began drinking.
"Cool. I got cherry," Nolan said.
"I think I got lemon-lime," Preston noted.
"Is this… blue raspberry?" Jilly asked. "AWESOME!"
"Alright, all of y'all who got cherry flavor, go step on the red mat," Hatchet instructed as he gestured to a red mat on the floor. "Those of y'all with lemon-lime, y'all go on the yellow mat. Y'all who got blue raspberry can go step on the blue mat. MOVE, MAGGOTS! MOVE!"
Barry, CJ, Erica, Mac, Nolan, and Rachel all went on the red mat.
Bailey, Chappy, Franklin, Judy, Preston, Susan, and Ziggy all went on the yellow mat.
David, Ernie, Jilly, Kiki, Lauren, Spankety, and Tucker all went on the blue mat.
"Alright, in last place, with only six members, is the red team, which will now be known as Team Flame!" Hatchet announced.
"Well that blows," Erica huffed.
Confessional:
Barry: I may have gotten last place, but that doesn't bother me. I've gone on mission trips before, so I know what it's like to live with little food and poor sleeping conditions.
CJ: Cool. If we keep this up, I'll be gone in no time.
Rachel: Let's see, I have Barry, Mac, and Nolan on my team, correct? They shouldn't be too hard to sway. I'll take control of my team first, then the rest of the game once the merge hits.
"In second place, as Judy was the second-to-last to arrive, is the yellow team, also known as Team Thunder!" Hatchet announced.
"What?! SECOND! This WILL NOT STAND!" Chappy roared.
"Hey, hey. We still won. We didn't get last," Judy said calmingly.
"No, but we didn't get first!" Chappy snapped.
Confessional:
Chappy: I canNOT beLIEVE that I got *BLEEP*ING SECOND *BLEEP*ING PLACE! If we keep this up, I'll vote every one of those mother *bleep*ers on my team out of the game and become a team of *bleep*ing one! That'll show 'em!
Judy: This is going to be a long season…
Franklin: To be frank, ahem, so to speak, Chappy frightens me. If he reacts this way to every loss, he'll definitely be the first one gone on our team.
"…And in first place, since Tucker was the third-to-last to join us, is the blue team, Team Chill!" Hatchet announced.
"Team Chill? More like team Jill, am I right?!" Jilly joked.
"I don't get it," David said.
Confessional:
Kiki: Yes! This is the best thing that could have happened to us! All four members of the Girls Alliance are on the same team. As for the boys, well, they don't seem like the best at the social game, so I don't think anyone here will miss them too much.
Ernie: As per usual, I seem to be the smartest one of the group. This game shouldn't be difficult at all.
David: OHHH, wait! Her name's Jilly! And Jill rhymes with chill! And that's our team name! I get it now! Hahaha.
"Alright. It's lunchtime, so y'all can go report to the mess hall for food," Hatchet said. "But not Team Flame. Y'all six get to stay in the backyard as punishment for getting in last place!"
Erica flipped Hatchet the bird.
"Girl, you do not want to test my patience!" Hatchet told her as she and the rest of her team went out back.
Hatchet turned to face the camera. "How will losing this challenge affect Team Flame down the road? Will Kiki's alliance take over team Chill, or will Ernie back up his claims about bein' so smart? And what will happen with Chappy if Team Thunder loses another challenge? Y'all are gonna have to find out, next time on Total! Drama! HOUSE PARTY!"
