Days Of Old

Germania 990 b.c.

I remember, growing up, it seemed like my village was always fighting. Our village was called Braun by us. What others called it, I don't know. My father would one day be happy and peaceful, or as peaceful as he could get, and not seem to have a care in the world. The next day, a large group of men would come to the village and father and the other men of Braun would have to fight them off. It was a constant, unchanging lifestyle that, to me, seemed tedious and unrewarding. But that wasn't something I could change.

When I was much younger than I am now, I can remember always working. Even now, all I do is work. I walk around with mother and other women gathering sticks and water from the river nearby while father runs around looking for food with the wolves we had by our side. And lately, mother had been looking at me strangely. I'd always been a short little girl. But in recent years, I'd sprouted into a much taller girl. I was taller than most boys my age now, like what seemed to be common. It was funny to me that men were the protectors and the providers, yet women, meek, weak, and defenseless, grew faster.

"Heidi, I'll get the water. You handle wood for today." My mother said while father was cooking a rabbit for breakfast. My little brother sat next to me chewing on a bone from last night's dinner. He'd been complaining recently about his teeth hurting him. Father simply said, 'be grateful you have teeth', and that was the end of his loving words.

"Yes, mother."

"And bring Adalwulf with you. He might like having a twig to chew on for a while." I nodded without adding further to the conversation. Adalwulf was my little brother. He was only a young age. We lost track of how old he is. No one really keeps track of such trivial things. He was named after our grandfather and looked a lot like mother. I looked more like father, though I had mother's reddish brown hair while father's hair was a simple brown.

After we had breakfast, father left to hunt for more food while mother made her way to the river to get fresh water. As mother ordered, I went through the woods with Adalwulf to get firewood. Some of the other children from the village accompanied me while others stayed and got to work on their winter clothes. The seasons were changing and leaves were falling. It would start snowing soon and we needed all the fur we could get. That was the reason father always saved the rabbit fur whenever we had rabbit for breakfast. It was mother's favorite kind of fur. It was soft and warm and did nicely to protect us from the cold wind.

"My mom's with child again." I looked at Xavier and shrugged. Xavier's mother was envied by all the women in the village because she'd already had five children and was still alive and healthy. Normally, a woman was lucky if she lived through one birth. My mother barely survived Adalwulf.

"She is? Doesn't she have enough kids?" I ignored Xavier and Björn while they spoke.

Once we gathered all the wood, we went back to the village and distributed the wood evenly amongst the families. Adalwulf chewed on a piece of wood that he'd found and went through that almost instantly, demanding something else to chew on. I handed him the bone he'd been chewing on earlier and told him to leave me alone.

Later that day, father came back fighting off a group of men that were trying to steal the deer that he and the others had caught through the day. They came through the village and started fighting once they had the deer protected behind them. I ran into our tent and tried to hide with my little brother. Adalwulf wanted to get out and fight the men off with a little stick, but I held onto him so he wouldn't get out.

"Let me go, Heidi. I want to go out."

"Well, too bad, you're staying in here. What good do you think you were going to do with a twig?"

"I'll do something. Let me go." As Adalwulf struggled, I held him tighter and tighter so he wouldn't get away.

As I held on tighter, a man barged into our tent yelling, making me and Adalwulf scream. I saw a large wooden spike at the corner of my eye, grabbed that, and pointed it forward, making the man run right into it, stopping his yell and giving him a stunned look on his face. Then he fell over, not quite dead, but in enough pain that he didn't want to fight anymore. Out of panic, my little brother started hitting the man over the head repeatedly. I stood back and let him, covering my face, not wanting to look.

While I was covering my eyes in fear, I noticed I felt sticky and a stabbing pain in my abdomen. I looked down and saw a lot of blood. I hadn't even felt the man stab me or see it. I couldn't understand why I was suddenly bleeding so much. I stood up and saw the blood everywhere and screamed. My little brother looked over asking me what was wrong and started screaming when he saw all the blood. Father came bursting through the cover of the tent yelling if we were okay. When he saw all the blood, he ran over to me and checked to see where my wound was. But his hands never found any cuts nor did I feel any scratches or cuts on my legs. All the pain was in my abdomen.

Then mother rushed into the tent after father, seeing all the blood. She didn't react as fearfully though. She acted a little proud if anything. She walked over and swatted father's hands away from me telling him that she knew what was going on and it was nothing for him to worry about. Then she took me with her to the river to clean me off. When I had all my clothes off, mother cleaned them while I cleaned myself.

"You said you know what's wrong with me." Mother nodded.

"Nothing's wrong with you, Heidi. You've become a woman is all. Every woman bleeds every month. It means that she can have children. And some woman feel a lot of pain during this monthly process, some don't. I never did, but that doesn't mean anything I don't think."

"So I'm not dying?" Mother shook her head.

"Not at all. We will need to start thinking about giving you a husband, though. It wouldn't be decent for a woman to be unmarried, and you wouldn't want to be indecent would you?"

"But I'm a little kid." Mother shook her head again.

"You've started your womanly cycles. You're not a child anymore. Since you're not a child anymore, you need to start having children right away. You don't have much time to do that."

"But Xavier's mother has four kids already. And she's with her fifth child and she's still okay. And you had me and Adalwulf and you're fine too."

"That's us. How many of your friends still have their mothers?" I didn't want to respond to her question. Aside from me, Xavier, and a boy in our village, Falk, there weren't any kids that still had their mothers. Most the children my age didn't even know their mothers. Braun lost more women to childbirth than even rap and invasion. "My point exactly."

"Well, maybe I don't want to have children. Maybe I want to live."

"You're a woman, Heidi. We make babies. That's what we were made for and that's all we do. There's no point in arguing over something you can't change. Besides, you're father will start looking for a husband for you as soon as he knows, so get used to the idea."

I didn't argue with mother any further. If I did, she would just start hitting me to get me to be quiet. As soon as we got back, mother and father took some time alone in our tent to talk. Adalwulf went away to play with Xavier and Julian with the wolves. I stood close to the tent hoping to overhear what mother and father were talking about. But they were talking so quietly that I couldn't tell.

"Heidi?" I turned around to look at whoever was talking to me. It was Mitzi. She was my younger cousin and one of my best friends. I smiled when I saw her.

"Hey, Mitzi." Mitzi didn't look all that happy.

"Are you okay? I heard you got injured."

"Oh no, I wasn't injured, I'm fine. Mother says it was just a sign that I'm a woman or something."

"Oh. So does that mean you'll be getting married soon?" I shrugged.

"Mother says so. I don't want to, though. Getting married means I'll have to start having kids."

"Isn't that a good thing?"

"Not if it means I'll most likely die. It happened to your mother, it happened to Oscar's mother, it happened to almost everyone's mother. I don't want that to be me."

"I see. Do you even have a choice in this, though? Father told me that the lord wanted to give one of Braun's to the village that's been attacking for so long. A peace offering I think he said." My eyes widened.

"Are you sure?" Mitzi nodded.

"Yeah. Lord is willing to do just about anything to get that village to leave us alone."

"Well, that won't include giving me away."

"But Heidi, you don't have a say in the matter." Mitzi wasn't being rude or mean. She was innocently stating the obvious. But it only made me angrier. I tried not to take it out on her and took a deep breath to calm myself.

"Let's just hope for the best. I think that's all we can do." Mitzi smiled and nodded.

"Yeah. That's a good idea." When Mitzi finished, I heard the tent move and looked over to see father coming out of the tent with a slightly angry look on his face. I tried to ask him what was wrong, but he stopped looking at me and started walking away. I saw him get into Lord's tent and that was it.

When father was out of my sight, I went in the tent with Mitzi following after me and saw mother sitting preparing some deer and cleaning the fur. She only looked up to acknowledge me and smiled before getting right back to work without saying a word. I took a seat across from her with Mitzi at my side.

"So what did father say?" Mother shrugged.

"The same thing I did, Heidi. It's time to give your hand in marriage, end of discussion."

"But who does he want to give me to?"

"I don't know, Heidi. That's for Lord to decide once your father tells him. Lord will know the best man to give you to and that's that." I sighed and looked at my hands in my lap. Adalwulf came into the tent and made his way to his bed to hide something. Adalwulf looked at me, then looked away hurriedly.

"Adalwulf." I said his name with a quiet, but urgent voice. He looked up at me again with the same awkward stare.

"Yeah?"

"Come with me for a minute. I think we need to get more wood." Mother shook her head.

"We have enough for now, Heidi. You can gather wood with everyone else tomorrow."

"Fine then. At least let me take him to get cleaned. He's filthy as death." Mother gave me a stern look at my tone, then looked at Adalwulf and sighed.

"Fine. He could use the bath. But you're to be back before your father finishes with Lord, understood?"

"Mother, that could….."

"I said, is that understood?" Her tone was harsher this time and she was giving me a stern look that matched her voice. I breathed and nodded.

"Yes mother." Then I looked at Adalwulf. "Come one. You need a bath." Adalwulf shook his head.

"I don't want a bath."

"Well, too bad. You're getting one."

"You're not mother. You can't tell me what to do." Mother rolled her eyes.

"I'm telling her to take you to get a bath. When your father isn't here, my word goes. Now go with your sister and take a bath. You won't get back into this tent until you're clean." I grinned while Adalwulf pouted and walked over to me. I took a hold of his hand and pulled him with me out of the tent.

I walked as fast as I could to the river dragging my little brother behind me. I didn't listen to his complaints or his demands that I slow down. When we finally reached the river, I took off his clothes and threw him in. While he yelled at me, I hung up his clothes before turning my attention to him and giving him a look of death. When he saw my face, his face froze and he stayed quiet.

"What was that about?"

"What?"

"That look you gave me when you came home. What were you staring at me like that for?"

"I wasn't staring at you like anything."

"You're a horrible liar, Adalwulf. Now tell me what you know that I don't." Adalwulf rolled his eyes and sighed.

"I don't know, Heidi. The other kids just said that you'll get married soon."

"Why would that initiate a weird look from you, little brother?" Adalwulf backed away a little, not wanting to answer me.

"Well, Heidi…..Let's face it, you're not exactly…….What's the word I'm looking for?.........You don't look like any woman I've seen. You're kind of scrawny."

"Scrawny?! You're one to talk you little fichus."

"Hey, I'm still a little boy. I have time to grow into a man. You're a woman and you hardly look like one. You should be the one that's concerned if you ask me."

"Well, I didn't ask you. Now get cleaned. I don't want mother yelling at us for taking so long when we get back."

"It's your fault she sent us out in the first place. If you want to talk to me about all this stupid girly stuff, than you should've just met me outside the tent. See how much easier that would've been?"

"Don't question me, you toad. Now get cleaned up." Adalwulf glared at me for the rest of his bath, but did as I said. He didn't want to make mother angry either. She was a nasty lady when she was mad.

When he was done, he put on his clothes and we ran back to the village and went straight to our tent. Father was already there with mother getting ready to eat. Father looked upset and mother did too. Adalwulf and I simply took our seats and waited for mother to hand us a bowl so we could eat. But she didn't hand either of us anything.

"I told you two to be back before your father came home."

"I'm sorry mother. Adalwulf was really dirty. We were trying to get him really clean. You said you wouldn't let us in if he wasn't clean."

"Don't throw my words at me, Heidi. Your father wants to talk to you, that's why I told you to be home. Next time, listen to me, or there'll be a lashing." Then father spoke.

"Edith, that's enough." Mother looked at father a moment before looking at me again, but remaining silent, letting father speak. "I've spoken to Lord, Heidi. We have an idea of who we want to give you to, but it's not sure yet."

"Why?" Father sighed.

"We might give you to Lord Heidbrier." I gave father a weird look.

"Who's Lord Heidbrier?" I was trying to think if there was anyone in our village called Heidbrier, but I couldn't think of anyone.

"He's the leader of the village we've been fighting for a long time. Lord Braun is hoping giving you to their lord in marriage will stop the attacks. They've killed too many of our men and we simply can't handle anymore onslaughts." My eyes widened. I was furious, but I forced that emotion not to show.

"You're giving me to someone outside the village?" Father nodded, either not realizing or completely ignoring the slight anger in my voice.

"We've already sent a messenger over to them to tell them we're coming. We leave tomorrow and meet the messenger there. If they accept you, then they'll finally leave us alone. But if not, then we'll have to fight and try to run for home."

I didn't say anything in response. I wasn't sure what I could say. When I didn't speak, mother finally started dishing some food out for me and Adalwulf. But with the sudden news, I wasn't hungry. I poked at my food without looking at either mother or father. Neither of them said anything about my loss of appetite. When Adalwulf finished his piece of meat, he took mine since I wasn't eating. Normally, mother and father would have a fit, but tonight, they didn't say a word.

After dinner, mother and I took off all the meat that wasn't eaten and put it on a little skewer so we could turn it into jerky and store it for the winter. And we started cleaning out the bones for medicine and to make new utensils and weapons. Father went to Lord to prepare for tomorrow while Adalwulf went to bed without saying a word to me. While mother and I worked, mother finally got tired of the silence and spoke.

"This is exciting. Tomorrow, you'll be engaged."

"Father said they aren't sure."

"Oh Heidi, Adolf just said that to be safe. I'm sure everything will turn out fine."

"How can you be so sure about that, mother? These people have been nothing but thorns in our side and now you're giving me to them as a gift."

"You know why we're doing this, Heidi. Arguing isn't something I want to do our last night together."

"What else is there to talk about, mother?" Mother didn't say anything more. She just stared at me a moment before getting back to what she'd been doing, as did I. But another ten minutes went by and I started feeling bad. "I'm sorry. I just don't want to go." Mother sighed.

"I don't want you to go either, Heidi. But there's nothing I can do about that. All I can do is take advantage of this last quality time we have." I looked at mother a bit while she got out the last of some bone marrow from a deer's femur.

"Can I ask you something?"

"Of course, Heidi." I breathed deeply, not sure I really wanted to hear the answer to my question.

"Do you and father love each other?" Mother was silent a moment. I didn't really like that reaction. I was hoping that she would laugh and tell me the answer was obvious. But she was being too quiet. "Mother?"

"No, Heidi, we don't. Adolf was several years older than me and I was about your age when we got married. The Lord at the time said he was a good husband for me, my father didn't argue, and now Adolf and I have been unhappily married for all this time." I was silent again and went back to work. When I spoke, it was a whisper.

"I don't want that, mother."

"I know you don't Heidi. Neither did I. Neither does any woman in Braun that has to go through this. But we have no say in the matter. We never have and we never will. So just learn to do what I do. Pretend you're happy and follow your husband with everything he does without complaint and without a word. Women get beaten for arguing. Your father slapped me once for speaking back at him and I learned after that to never do it again. I'm telling you now so you don't make the same mistake I did." I gave my mother a serious look then. I knew I was pushing it, but I didn't care.

"I'm not going." Mother looked up at me wide eyed.

"What?"

"I'm not going. You might be okay with becoming a beaten puppy, mother, but I'm not. I'm not walking into a marriage where I know I'll be mistreated." Mother didn't respond. She only shook her head and got back to work.

When father got back, we all went to sleep and put out the fire. It was a long time before I went to sleep. I kept staring at the ceiling of our tent thinking. I didn't know what these people were really like, if they were different from what I'd always know them as. I had never met Lord Heidbrier, nor even heard of him. I had no idea how old he was, I didn't know what he was like or if he already had children, I didn't know anything. When I finally did fall asleep, I dreamed of what the next day might be like. But it was a horrible dream. I dreamed we were riding to their village on our horses with our wolves following close by and the other village attacking us with a vengeance. When I woke up, it was to my father shaking me.

"Heidi, get up. We need to get you ready before we go." I groaned out of sleep and father shook me again, repeating the same thing. I finally opened my eyes and forced myself out of my bed and followed after father to Lord's tent.

When we got there, the Lord's daughter had a new outfit picked out for me that father and Lord deemed more suitable. It was a tighter fitting dress than I'd ever worn before. And the fur that was showing from under the cuffs of the sleeves reveled that it was fox fur. It was tight around my neck and a yard of fur surrounded my shoulders like a hood with buttons made of nacre. When I had the dress on, it reached my ankles showing only my fur boots. Before we left, mother came to me and hugged for. It was first time I ever remembered her hugging me.

"You'll make a wonderful wife, Heidi. Just remember what I told you." Reluctantly, I nodded my head.

"I will mother." Mother let go of me after a moment and father led me to the horse and helped me up onto the horse. Before we left, father was sure to remind me that I was to say nothing unless I was spoken to. I only nodded my head and that made father smile and pat my back approvingly.

Father and the three other men coming with us, including our Lord, got on their horses and we made our way to where the Heidbrier village was currently resting. We left when it was still night and were still traveling when the sun started peeking in over the horizon. Father was speaking to Lord the whole time with the others remaining silent. I followed suit and said nothing. Whether I liked it or not, I would have to hope whoever they were giving me to would find me pleasant. If they didn't, there was no telling what they'd do. There wasn't even a guarantee that our messenger had been accepted and was still alive. That thought sent a chill down my spine.

The more I thought about it, there more nervous I was becoming. My stomach was turning uncomfortably and I could almost picture them slaughtering us because they found me undesirable. It was all I could seem to think about and I was ashamed to realize that I was desperately hoping for something I wanted least in life.

When we were approaching the village, I saw people start to notice us coming and run away or prepare to attack. All the while, I tried my best to look beautiful in whatever way I could. I tried puffing up my chest a little, sitting tall and straight, keeping my face blank and unyielding, anything I could think of that made me think of what a man would consider good qualities in a wife. People looked at us cautiously, but didn't attack us since we weren't attacking them. When we were close enough into the village, a tall, burly man got out of a tent and crossed his arms, looking at me strangely. We stopped when he was standing a few feet away from Lord's horse.

"This is it? You tell us you'll bring us a woman and you give us a child?" The man who spoke scared me. He had a long, thick brown beard that reached the top of his chest and a hard face that made him seem savage with the addition of all the wolf fur we saw him wearing. Lord shook his head, got off his horse to walk to me, and pulled me off my horse and presented me. I wasn't as tall as Lord, but I wasn't a very short girl, either.

"I assure you, Lord Heidbrier, she's every bit a woman as any other. She's young, yes, but she's become a woman a short time ago. It is our hope that you will accept Heidi as an offering to end this mindless bloodshed." Lord Heidbrier shook his head.

"What need do I have for a child? I have my wife and I have my sons. I don't want or need a daughter. And even if I did accept her, she can't carry on my legacy." Lord walked us a little closer.

"I won't argue that is true. But you have sons. Heidi is a lovely girl and would undoubtedly make a wonderful wife to one of your sons." As much as I hated what I was hearing, I never said a word. I only stood there and listened to them talk.

"I hardly think a child is worthy of any of my sons, Lord Braun." I stared forward, resisting the urge to look around. I was wondering where our messenger was. We didn't see him on our way here, so I would naturally assume he was still here.

"I promise you, she's no child. She's shed a woman's blood and is now able to bear children. She's as good as any woman." Lord Heidbrier looked at me a little longer, pondering. He walked closer to me and Lord Braun stepped back to allow the inspection.

I was short compared to Lord Heidbrier, but from what I could tell, I was no shorter than any other woman I was seeing. I noticed him grab a lock of my hair and inspect that, nodding slightly when the reddish brown color of my hair was satisfactory. Then he took a hold of my face by the chin and looked at me, turning my face to see all parts. Once again, he nodded approvingly. I was hopeful that maybe we'd all be alright after all. Lord Heidbrier started patting me down once he was standing behind me. I assumed he was checking for curves on my body, but I wasn't entirely sure. When he was done, he didn't look as impressed with that as he had with the other things. Then Lord Heidbrier looked at me a moment before sighing.

"She'll do, I suppose. She's certainly a beauty, that much I'll give you. But we better not have to wait long for her to grow any further." Lord Braun nodded his head.

"Not long at all, I assure you. But she can bear children as soon as you like." I held my composure, though my stomach was flipping and I felt sick. Lord Heidbrier looked at me a little longer in thought. Everyone stood in silence, watching him, waiting for him to pass judgment. Eventually, he finally came out of his thoughtfulness and looked at father.

"I suppose she could be a good wife for my youngest son, Sören. He's still older than you, but you'll do." I heard Lord Braun breathe a sigh of relief when Lord Heidbrier accepted me. Then he looked over his shoulder and called for Sören.

When Heidbrier called for him, a tall man came forward. He had facial hair, but it was nowhere near as prominent as his father's. His hair was a dark brown and he had intense brown eyes. Looking at him made me think of father. Father was always really detached and distant emotionally. Sören seemed to be the same way. For some reason, this fact made me feel a little less nervous.

"So what do you think, son?" Sören looked at me a moment, then looked at his father.

"She's a child." Lord Heidbrier shrugged.

"She's a small woman, but her father and Lord Braun assure us that she will grow quickly. And she's perfectly capable of having children right away." Sören looked at me again before looking back at his father.

"What happens if they're lying to us?" I felt like my heart had stopped when he said that. The thought that they would accuse us of lying never crossed my mind. I only knew as much as mother and father told me, but I would still be guilty by association. Lord Heidbrier simply smiled in humor.

"The same thing that happens to anyone who lies to us. We kill them." Though I held a straight face, I could feel myself shaking. It was hard to keep myself from shaking and I think Sören noticed. But he didn't look like he really cared. Then he shrugged and turned, about to walk away.

"Can't hurt, I guess. Sure, I'll take her." Lord Heidbrier smiled and patted Sören's shoulder as he walked away and then turned his attention back to Lord Braun and my father.

"There you have it. My son approves of the gift you've brought. We shall have a wedding ceremony tomorrow." Then Lord Heidbrier walked closer to us. "I assume you brought a suitable dowry."

"Yes, of course." I heard Lord Braun say this, then heard him say something to father. I looked over and saw father pull something off his horse and bring it over to Lord Heidbrier. Heidbrier looked through everything my father handed him and shrugged when he was done.

"I would expect better, but it'll do for now." My father's eyes widened.

"What do you mean, 'for now'?"

"You can't possibly think food is enough of a dowry to impress me. I expect this among other things, like tools, raw materials, furs, anything that a village would need."

"We don't have enough of that to spare. We gave you what we could spare for a dowry." Heidbrier shook his head at Lord Braun.

"It's not about what you can spare. It's about being respectful to your daughter's future family. And what you're giving me is hardly a respectable dowry. Our new couple can't live off this alone. How's she going to make a coat for my son, what's my son to use to make tools to protect his young wife? It takes a lot more than food to survive the winter." My father lost his temper and came forward.

"We don't have enough of that because you keep taking it. Why don't you provide them with things? Most of it belongs to us, after all."

I turned my attention to Lord Heidbrier, expecting him to be furious. But he didn't look mad at all. He looked amused. Oddly enough, this made me even more nervous. I didn't trust him in the slightest. He turned to look over his shoulder and told a man standing behind him to get Sören. When he was standing next to his father, he looked as uninterested as before.

"What?"

"Take your bride to your mother. I think she might want to freshen up after her long ride here and I'm sure your mother is looking forward to meeting her new daughter." Sören simply nodded his head and walked over to me, taking my hand and leading me with him to a tent that was further in the village.

It was a much larger village than mine. There seemed to be more people there than I'd ever seen before. What stunned me was how many women there were. In my village, women were either very young and without mothers, or they were the lucky few that lived through childbirth. Here, the amount of women I saw, with children no less, were staggering compared to my home. Sören took me closer to the last few homes of the village and stopped when an older woman came out of the tent. When she saw Sören, she gave him a small smile. But when she saw me, she looked upset for some reason.

She was a short woman, just barely at my eye level, with brown hair and brown eyes that were fierce and undying. She was very curvy. Her shape reminded me of a pear or a drinking container. But with that shape, she was also oddly boney. I wondered if this might be because of working so much.

"Who's this?" Her tone was a little harsh. I didn't appreciate it at all, but I didn't saw a thing.

"She's the bride that messenger told us about."

"Okay, fine, but who's marrying her? I thought your father killed that guy." My eyes widened when she said that. Sören remained indifferent looking.

"He did. And father's giving her to me." With those words, the woman's eyes shot open.

"What?!"

"What does it matter? She's capable of bearing children and the father assures me that she'll grow more in a short period of time."

"Well, I hope the ones who brought her made up for the poor quality by giving us a good dowry."

"Father wasn't too impressed with it, but he'll probably take care of that. He was never fond of the Braun village anyway, so he might use this as an excuse to get rid of them all together for the insult."

"No!" They both looked at me stunned from my outburst. The woman was the one to address it and she looked like she was about to hit me.

"I did not give you permission to speak." Sören stopped her from hitting me by grabbing onto her wrist.

"She's my future wife, mother. I'll handle this appropriately. But I don't have time to do that now. Just take her inside and get her ready for dinner tonight. And get Aunt Aleida to help you. You two can let her know how everything works around here and make her feel welcome."

Sören patted my head once before taking his leave and going back in the other direction. When I couldn't see him anymore, the woman took a hold of my hand and pulled me with her into the tent. Then she sat me down and looked around for something. When she found what she was looking for, a leg of deer, she left the tent. I sat where she put me, waiting for her to get back. A few moments later, I started hearing women talking to each other and approaching the tent. I finally heard them clearly when they both entered.

The new woman also had brown hair, though it was a little darker. She was just as full figured and her eyes were also a deep brown. But her eyes weren't nearly so cold. The actually looked welcoming and inviting. And when she looked at me, she smiled more.

"So this is my new niece?" The other woman nodded.

"It would appear so. I didn't think Kraus was planning to accept this girl when he killed the messenger, but I suppose he saw some good in her." The kinder woman shrugged.

"I don't know. I think you're being too judgmental. She's a sight to see as it is. Imagine what a beauty she'll be when she's fully grown. Besides, Germaine, there's no use in arguing with Kraus. Once he's made a decision, he's stuck to it, you know that."

"That's hardly the point, Aleida." Aleida sighed.

"Look, Germaine. You've been good for my brother all these years. I think that's the only reason he doesn't beat you senseless with that attitude you have. But seeing as he's been so good to you over the years, I don't think you should complain too much when he does something. Especially when the decision isn't very rash."

"He accepted a bribe from a village he's killing off anyway. How's that not rash." Aleida rolled her eyes.

"You know what, Germaine, if you're going to complain the whole time about this, I think it best you just leave this to me. Go to my house and do something. I don't care what you do as long as you're keeping yourself occupied. I'll take care of the bride to be."

Germaine looked reluctant at first. She looked at me for several moments before she finally sighed and left the tent to go somewhere else. Once she was gone, Aleida came to me with a kind, inviting smile. I couldn't concentrate on it though.

"Hello. I'm Aleida, your new aunt. What's your name?"

"Why is Lord Heidbrier going to kill my village? He brought me. I thought that would make your village stand down." I was almost crying now. It was the first time I'd shown any emotion since yesterday when father told me he was bringing me here. Aleida lost her smile and sighed.

"I wish I could tell you everything would be okay, but I can't. What I can tell you is that you have nothing to fear. You'll be Sören's wife by tomorrow. And once you two are married, you'll be an official member of this village just like anyone else and will be treated as such. Not to mention you'd have the right to punish anyone that brought harm to you. You are, after all, the wife of the future lord of this village."

"That hardly makes me feel better." Aleida shrugged.

"That's not something I can help. I'm just letting you know what's going on."

Aleida walked over to another part of the tent and looked through a pile of clothes. When she found what she was looking for, she pulled it out and walked back over to me. She was holding something white. It was entirely fur. White fox fur from what I could tell. Along with it was a dress that was made out of a fabric I'd never seen before.

"What's this white stuff?" Aleida shrugged.

"No idea. We encountered a village one day that had it. It's white and comfortable and plenty warm, so it makes a perfect dress for winter weddings. And you'll be wearing white fur, of course."

I looked at the dress she was showing me for a moment. It wasn't anything really spectacular. It looked the same as any other dress that the women around the village were wearing, only white. I looked at it aimlessly while Aleida stayed quiet. When I did speak again, her expression didn't lose any of its enthusiasm.

"I don't want to marry Sören. I hardly know him." Aleida shrugged.

"I hardly knew my husband before we got married and we're doing alright." I looked up at her questioningly.

"Do you love him?" Aleida was quiet again. She lost a lot of her smile, but not all of it. Now her smile seemed sad. She didn't answer me for a moment, but when she did, her smile returned with a vengeance.

"Of course I do. He's my husband." I sighed a little to myself. It wasn't hard to see that she was lying. We didn't talk about it further. She simply changed the subject. "I know Sören looks scary, but once you get over that little part of him, he's really a good boy. He'll make you a wonderful husband."

"He seems so distant all the time." Aleida shrugged.

"That's probably because of his mother, Germaine. She's not a very affectionate person, so she never really nurtured Sören when he was a boy." Then in the background, we heard a horn blow. It went on a moment, then stopped. Once the noise was gone, Aleida turned back to me. "It's the village horn. That means everyone needs to go to the middle of the village where we have a clearing. I think they're going to announce the engagement."

Then Aleida took my hand and pulled me with her out of the tent and led me to the center where everyone was gathering. When we got there, she handed me to Sören, who only glanced at me before grabbing my hand and leading me with him towards a platform where Lord Heidbrier was standing. Lord Heidbrier caught the people's attention with a booming voice.

"My friends, family, and comrades. Today, Heidbrier welcomes a new family. I, Kraus Heidbrier, am pleased to announce to you my future daughter." Then he turned his attention to me, as did everyone else. Sören pulled me forward with him and put me front and center. When I was standing right next to Lord Heidbrier, he smiled at me. "Tell them who you are, dear."

I looked at Lord Heidbrier nervously, then glanced at Sören, then Aleida. Aleida smiled and motioned her hands towards me as a way of encouragement. Everyone stared and waited patiently for me to respond. Sören swatted my back gently, thinking maybe I was in a daze and trying to get me out of it. When he did that, I took a deep breath and looked forward, not at anything or anyone in particular.

"Heidi." Lord Heidbrier grinned and looked back at everyone.

"My new daughter and the wife of your future leader, Heidi. The wedding will be tomorrow and there will be a grand feast for all to celebrate this wondrous union. Hurray for Sören and Heidi."

The crowd cheered back the words Heidbrier had said three times before roaring in applause. I stood there looking at them and feeling nervousness in the pit of my stomach. All I could think about was my family. What would happen to my parents and my little brother? Adalwulf used to be such a pain, but now, I felt like I'd give anything to hug him and tell him he was the best little brother a sister could ask for. I wished that I could've been closer to mother and father. In truth, father's quick to anger way of parenting scared me and made me scared of him. But that didn't seem to matter anymore. I was taken out of my thoughtfulness when I saw three men coming towards me with smiles on their faces.

"Sören finally gets a wife. It's about time." I didn't hear Sören say anything, but the man standing at the front grinned. "Don't give me that face. I'm only teasing you because I care." The man standing to his left spoke.

"I just can't believe you're marrying a little girl. I mean, my wife's younger than me too, but this is a little extreme." The man to the far right nodded his head.

"How do you know she can even have kids? Her family could be lying." I kept my head down as they spoke. I knew what they would start talking about and I didn't want to listen to it. When Sören spoke, he sounded uninterested as always.

"If she can't have kids now, she'll be able to have them eventually. She can only grow, after all. Besides, father's the one that handles this sort of stuff, not me." The man in the middle grinned.

"You'll have to deal with it eventually too, oh father's successor." The one to the far right, rolled his eyes.

"I still can't believe you're taking over. You're the youngest. Why wouldn't he pick you?" He looked at the man in the middle and he shrugged.

"I suppose he wanted to insure that the one who took over after him would rule for a long, long time. You must admit, his youth ensures that he'll live longer than us."

"You never know. He might not." The one to the far left said with a wicked grin. I took a step back when I saw him.

He scared me and I didn't want to look at him. He had sideburns and long, curly brown hair that went to his shoulders. He looked older than the other two, but that might have been because the other two didn't have any facial hair. They both just had long hair. I wondered why Sören had such short hair. I suddenly realized he was the only one in the village with short hair. Instead of getting nervous or yelling, Sören grabbed my shoulder and pulled me back.

"Maybe one day, I'll die young and you three can fight to the death like you've always wanted. But for now, I think I should show my future wife around. It's only polite."

Before any of the three men could respond, Sören turned me in the other direction and led me in front of him into the village. I avoided looking back. The one that had been on the left scared me. Instead, I looked up at Sören and didn't see anything odd about his face. I looked down again and didn't say a thing. He was the one who eventually spoke.

"Those were my brothers by the way." I looked up at him again, then looked back down.

"That's nice." I felt him shrug. I looked up again, curious. "Is it?" He half shrugged, half shook his head.

"They're far from my favorite people in the world. They're all a lot older than me, so when father said he wanted me to take over when he died, it caused a lot of tension between us. I was the little brother that took away what they consider rightfully belongs to Falk, and to me they're the jealous siblings that went out of their way to outcast me from their group."

"That's awful."

"I guess you could call it that. But in a way, I'm grateful to them for being so callous to me when I was younger."

"Why would you be grateful for that?" He breathed out and thought for a moment.

"I guess you could say they taught me to always be on my toes, no matter what."

"So you can't be relaxed, even in your own home?" He shook his head then.

"I can when I'm home. I already have my own tent and that's where I relax and unwind." He looked at me then with as serious a face as ever. "That being said, I want to tell you something. I guess you could say it's a rule I have for my house."

"Yes?"

"Don't talk to me when we're home before dinner. Unless I talk to you, of course. I value getting to have some quiet time and I'd like to be able to keep that." I nodded my head.

"Yes, sir." He looked at me with a strange look. It was sort of confused. "Did I do something?"

"You don't have to call me sir."

"Mother told me that I should call you sir."

"Well, your mother doesn't tell you what to do anymore. I do. And I'm telling you not to call me sir. Just call me Sören and I'll call you Heidi. That's what we were named and that's how we'll address each other. Clear?" I nodded.

"Yes…Sören." He nodded approvingly.

"Good. Glad that's clear." I simply nodded my head in agreement.

Shortly after, we reached a large tent that I hadn't seen before. He opened the door and gently pushed my back, telling me to go in. I walked in and took a look around at it. It was relatively large compared to anything I'd ever stayed in. I suppose that's normal when you're the heir to power. There was a fire pit in the middle with a rug of fur that was the bed off to the right and the left side was pretty much empty.

"This is my home, so think of it as yours too." I didn't respond with more than a nod. I heard him close the door and walk over to me and saw him take a seat next to the fire pit. "Today will be an exception to my usual rule of no talking before dinner. Come sit with me." He motioned his hand for me to sit next to him. I did as he said and walked over and took a seat. When I was down, he breathed out and spoke. "First things first. Remind me what village you came from."

"Braun, si…Sören." He smiled a little at my correction.

"Alright. The village we've been confronting lately."

"Sören." I doubted this would help, but I wanted to at least try. He looked up at me again, waiting for me to speak. I could tell he was a little annoyed that I spoke out of turn, but that wasn't important at the moment. "Please. Don't do anything to my family. They gave me in the hopes that we wouldn't have to fight you anymore." I realized I started crying and held my head down. I wanted to speak further, but he answered.

"I don't have a say in what happens to them. If father decides to dispose of them, there's nothing I can do or say that will change his mind. Until he dies, I'm just like any other person in this village that takes orders from my father and follows them without question."

I hated his tone. It was so matter-of-fact and business-like. I couldn't understand how he could be so chauvinistic. Lord Heidbrier hinted repeatedly that he was planning to rid of my village and he acted like it was just a day of hunting. It infuriated me. I stopped crying and looked at the fire pit, but still looked upset, I was sure. Sören didn't say anything again for a good while. Or it felt like a long time.

"Try to get over it. You have a family here now."

"Your father's a beast for doing this to innocent people and you're no better than he is whether you claim to have a say or not."

I spoke before thinking and immediately regretted what I said. He would hit me, I was sure. Father always hit me whenever I spoke out of line. Mother did too. And she warned me that a husband would hit if his wife spoke out of turn or did anything to offend him. I sat there looking at the fire pit, waiting for him to hit me. But he didn't. When a minute or so passed, I looked up at him. He was looking at me, but it was the same face I'd seen since I first saw him.

"There's venison out front. I expect it cooked by the time I get back." Then he stood up and walked out of the tent, leaving me staring at the spot he'd once been in.

After simply staring at his seat for a few minutes, I finally sighed and stood up to go to where he said the deer meat was. He forgot to mention it was still whole. I didn't want to bother with a leg, so I cut of a section of meat near where it was already cut open and took that inside. I guessed that a large chunk of meat would be enough for him and me. I put that on a plate and lit a fire to get it started. I found some knives and stones I could use to tenderize and cut up the meat so it would be easier to cook. I wasn't sure when he'd be back and I didn't think I would have time for a rotisserie.

Once I had everything in a decent size, I started cooking them on a thin piece of bone I found. I saw mother cook her meat that way and it seemed to work relatively well. I only hoped he hadn't been using for something else important. As I was cooking, someone came in and surprised me. I looked over and saw the man from before who'd been to the left. He smiled slightly at me and walked in.

"A little birdie tells me you yelled at Sören." I shook my head. Then he looked surprised. "You didn't? Interesting. You never called him or our father a beast?" I breathed out the breath I was holding. I should've figured that's what he was talking about. I nodded and he gave me another smile. "I thought so. My wife heard you two talking. Her name is Adriane by the way. You'll meet her tomorrow."

"I spoke before thinking. I'm sorry to cause offense." He laughed a little under his breath.

"You're damn right you spoke before thinking. You're lucky he didn't beat you to a pulp for being so offensive. Normally, father would have a few things to say to you, but once again, Sören was kind and saved your pretty little neck. He told father to let him handle it."

"Isidor!" I heard Sören yell from outside the tent. The man, Isidor, looked over his shoulder at Sören as he approached and smiled.

"Hey, runt. How've you been?" Sören pushed Isidor aside so he could enter the tent.

"I didn't give you permission to enter my tent and I certainly didn't give you permission to speak to my wife so rudely."

"She's not your wife yet, runt. I can talk to her however I please."

"Not while she's in my house. Now get out and let me eat in peace." Isidor gave Sören a strange, hostile look before stepping out of the tent and walking away. Sören didn't say anything as he walked over to the pit, nor did he say anything about the food not being cooking entirely yet. When he finally did talk, it was just as indifferently.

"That was Isidor. He's the second born out of all four of us. Falk is the oldest, Isidor is the second, Kilian is third, and I'm the youngest. I'm sorry if he scared you. He tends to have that effect on people." I shook my head.

"It's alright." He was quiet again for a moment. I didn't think he would say anything, but he took me by surprise.

"I spoke to my father." I immediately looked at him, a little stunned.

"What?"

"I spoke with my father. About your village. I can't promise you that they'll live, but I can at least tell you that I spoke to father and tried to change his mind." I looked at him a little dumbfounded for a moment. I wasn't sure what to say. When I could finally talk again, I smiled a little.

"Thank you. I'm sorry I spoke to you like that." He was silent a moment before he said anything.

"Just don't yell at me like that again and we'll get along fine." I smiled a little and nodded my head and handed him a plate of food when it was done. He started eating and looked at the pit for the most part. I looked at his hair again and suddenly got the urge to ask.

"Why are you the only one here with short hair?" He looked at me from the pit, surprised by my question.

"I cut it so my brothers couldn't grab onto it anymore. They used to grab onto my hair and hold me in a headlock and beat me up. I cut it so they couldn't grab onto it and I'd have a shot at beating them." My eyes widened.

"They used to do that to you?" He nodded.

"Like I said. We have tension because father decided to have me take over when he died. They don' like that, so they'd beat me up every chance they got."

"Why didn't your father or mother stop them?" Sören laughed a little to himself.

"Please. Father encouraged us to fight. He said it made us more useful in battle. And mother decided there was no better way to separate the boys from the men than to let us beat the shit out of each other and see who was left standing. Why? How did you and your siblings get along?"

"We didn't beat each other up. I had one little brother, Adalwulf, and I never beat him up. Push him around, maybe, but I never hurt him. I left punishing to mother and father."

"Well, that's your family. In my family, rarely if ever made time for us. We were usually with mother and she never really talked to us either. I guess you could say my brothers and I raised each other."

"My mother and father were distant too. My mother hugged me once. It was yesterday."

"What hug? We never hugged. We never hugged, never kissed, never patted on the back, nothing. We hit each other, that's about it. I was lucky if mother or father ever gave me or my brothers a passing glance of approval." I was silent again for a moment. I wasn't sure I should say anything in response at all.

"Why were they always so tough on you guys?" Sören looked at the pit a moment with a thoughtful expression. I looked at him, waiting for an answer. Finally, he shrugged.

"It taught us to be strong and independent. All we had to rely on was ourselves. That's the point they wanted to get across, and that's what I believe in now."

We didn't talk anymore after that. I wasn't sure I wanted to talk anymore. Since we started talking, I noticed that he would have moments where he seemed relatively happy, and other times when he would go right back to the way he normally is. I don't think I could live with that for the rest of my life. And I certainly have no intention of raising children the way he was raised. My parents were distant and obviously his were too. I didn't want that for my children.

When he was done eating, he rested his plate on the floor and walked out of the tent to go do something else. When he was gone and I was done eating, I cleaned everything in a little bucket he had near the corner with water that he had in another container. I decided I'd ask Aleida where the river was so I could get more water when I was done. When everything was clean, I walked out of the tent and looked for Aleida and managed to get to her before I ran into Germaine. I knew I wouldn't like Germaine from the moment I met her. And she didn't seem to want to make an effort to like me either.

"Don't worry about getting water right now. Just take some of mine. We always get water in the morning. You'll have to come with us to get it, so just wait until then." I smiled and nodded.

"Thanks, Aleida."

"Think nothing of it. You're going to be my niece tomorrow."

"Of course I'll think about it. So far, you're the only person here who's really accepted me." Aleida waved her hand dismissively.

"Don't worry about that. They'll get used to you. That's all they need, time to get used to you. And as far as your future brothers are concerned, just ignore them. Those four have always been hostile. I'm not saying that means they can be mean to you, but I just want you to know why they're acting the way they are. It has nothing to do with you."

"Thanks for telling me that. I guess I'll see you in the morning, then." Aleida smiled and nodded her head.

"I look forward to it. You can return the container you use tomorrow." I smiled a little wider.

"I will. Thank you."

"You're welcome, Heidi. And don't worry. You'll be a wonderful wife."

"Thank you, Aleida." She shook her head.

"Please, you're family. Call me Aunty. That's what Sören calls me." I nodded my head.

"Thank you, Aunty." She grinned and I smiled back as I walked into her tent and took a small container and filed it with water before going back to the tent.

When I had that, I looked around the tent for something, anything, to do. Aleida had been busy with carving bone and I knew that could be tedious and needed a lot of attention, so I didn't want to distract her with mindless talk. I kept looking, hoping that there might be something for me to clean or organize, but there wasn't much. Sören appeared to be a really tidy, clean person, or he at least kept a clean house. I appreciated that, but at the same time, it left me with nothing to do. With little option, I decided to get some more food and get that ready for dinner. I wasn't sure when he would be back, but I would be prepared to start cooking if he was hungry.

I was already really cold, so I started up the pit and got the fire going, making sure not to let the flames get too high. As I was playing with the fire, I remembered something mother used to make all the time. Whenever father got a large amount of meat, mother would combine the different types and cook it and put in some water. I always thought it was tasty. I made a mental note to myself to try that one of these days. Certainly during the winter. That's when she always made it. There was nothing like a hot soup on a cold winter day.

Still left with nothing to do, I left the pit and went over to the pile of fur that made the bed and laid down. I was tired from today and wanted to take a nap. It was the best way for me to pass the time. I finally dozed off after finding the perfect position in the mass of fur. I woke up to the feeling of something nudging me. I groaned in protest and whatever was nudging me spoke.

"Heidi, get up." I turned my head from one side to the other and opened my eyes to see who it was. It was Sören.

"I'm sorry. I'll make dinner." Sören gave me a strange look.

"What dinner? It's morning. I had some dried meat. There's some on a plate for you too. And Aleida and the others are leaving to go to the river soon."

"Oh. I didn't know I slept so long."

"I figured you needed the sleep. We have a big night ahead of us. Once you guys get the water, you'll go to Auntie's tent and she'll fix the dress so it fits you better."

"Okay. Did you fix yourself some dinner?"

"I just had some dry meat. Don't worry about it. They're leaving soon so you better eat fast and get going." I nodded my head and forced myself out of bed and chewed on the dried meat he told me about before getting the large bucket and walking out of the house with it and making my way to Aleida's home.

"Heidi! Good you're awake." I smiled at Aleida as I walked to her.

"Yeah. Sören woke me up." Aleida smiled.

"Try to wake up before him from now on." I nodded.

"Yes, Aunty." She grinned wider for remembering her nickname and hugged me around my neck.

"Alright. Time to go to the river and get water. And you'll be taking a bath before we come home. And we'll stop at my home and fit you into your dress." I smiled.

"Thank you, Aunty. I probably look awful right now." Aleida shook her head.

"Absolutely not, Heidi. You look cute as a button. We just need to clean your hair. And we have a little paste that we put in your hair for a few minutes and wash it out. It makes your hair smell like flowers."

"Really?" She nodded.

"Yep. We only use it for special occasions and a wedding is definitely a special occasion." As she spoke, she lifted a large bucket onto her hip and I followed her as she walked over to a group of women that were waiting to go to the river.

As we made our way to the river, no one really talked to me. Aleida was mostly talking to Germaine. I could tell they were talking about me. Germaine looked annoyed and would glance back at me several times after Aleida said something. I overheard her say that she should be grateful to get another daughter. Of course, Germaine didn't see it that way. She simply thought I was too young and wasn't good enough. I didn't argue with her or try to defend myself. I think Aleida was already doing that. I couldn't stand the thought that after tonight, this woman would be my new mother.

It didn't take long to reach the river. Maybe a few minutes. All the women filled their buckets with water and made their way back to the village when they had all they wanted. Aleida told me to stay and take a bath and that the paste she told me about was resting right next to a tree that was a few feet away from the river. When I was alone, I took of my clothes and hung them over a branch and took the paste with me to the river's edge.

The water was blistering cold, but after a while, it started to feel okay. When I was used to the temperature of the water, I dipped my head down to get my hair wet and lathered it with the flowery paste. I could definitely smell lilacs and roses. There was another flower that I couldn't pinpoint. But it smelled wonderful. I wanted to leave it on forever. But as Aleida instructed, I only left it in for a few minutes before washing it all out of my hair. When I was clean, I dried myself off with some fabric Aleida left for me and got dressed before taking my bucket of water and walking back to the village. I passed Aleida and smiled and she smiled back.

"Come right back when you get that home, alright, Heidi." I nodded.

"I'll be there in a minute, Aunty." Aleida smiled and walked into her tent while I walked back to mine and placed the bucket of water where I'd last seen it. Sören wasn't home. I assumed he must be hunting.

I ran to Aleida's home and she quickly got to work on my dress. She tightened and used sharp bone to keep things in place and took it off me when she was done and began to sow. I helped her get it done so it would be ready for tonight and I tried it on again when she was done sewing. She made a few minor adjustments while I was wearing it and took it off me again when she was done.

"It fits you like a glove, Heidi. You'll be a beautiful bride." I smiled.

"Thanks for saying, Aunty." Aleida sensed that I wasn't as enthusiastic as one might assume a bride to be and sighed.

"I know this isn't exactly what you want, Heidi. But believe me, it's for the best. Sören's a good man and he'll be a good husband for you." I looked up at her again and she looked at me. "What's wrong?" I sighed.

"Before I left home, I asked mother what her and father's marriage was like. If they were in love."

"And what did she say?" I turned my attention away from her and to my hands that were rested in my lap.

"She didn't love him. She barely liked him. I always said I never wanted that. I always said that I wanted to marry a man that loved me and that I loved in return." Aleida looked at me with sad eyes a moment.

"I know. We all do."

"I thought you loved your husband." Aleida was quiet for a moment again.

"I respect him. And I'm very fond of him. He's a good man and he's given me two beautiful children. They're grown now, of course."

"But you aren't in love?" She sighed and shook her head.

"No. He's more like a friend than my lover. He's a wonderful companion and he makes me laugh, but there's something missing." She turned her attention back to me and smiled a little again. "But don't be so blue. You never know. You might learn to love Sören."

"How can I learn to love him?"

"I don't know, Heidi. But he'll be a wonderful husband and I know you'll make him a wonderful wife. You two might never love each other, but you might come to like each other. And that's better than a petty hatred for one another like Germaine and Kraus."

"They hate each other?" Aleida nodded.

"Always have, always will. How they tolerated each other enough to have four children is unfathomable to me. Germaine gives him dirty looks and Kraus hits and yells at her all the time. It's never quiet with them." I sighed.

"I miss my parents. They never argued in front of us." Aleida laughed a little.

"Neither did mine or Kraus'. Their violence towards one another is a freak accident if you ask me." I finally smiled a little.

"Those do happen." Aleida giggled to herself.

"I suppose they do." We laughed together for a few more minutes while Aleida finished my dress. When she was done, I stayed with her for a while until her husband came home.

He was a really tall man with the usual long hair and a beard. But he had an oddly kind face, like something you would rely on for comfort. Like most men in the village, he wore lay upon layer of fur to keep himself warm from the cold.

"Is this the bride?" Aleida nodded.

"Yes. This is Heidi. She's our new niece." The man smiled warmly and I smiled back.

"Welcome to the family, Heidi. I'm your uncle Steffen."

"It's a pleasure to meet you, Steffen." Aleida smiled and gently swatted my arm.

"Now, we'll have none of that. He's your uncle, so you address him as such." I was confused a moment over what she meant, but I realized she meant no first names, and I simply smiled and looked at Steffen again.

"I'm sorry. It's a pleasure to meet you, Uncle." Steffen laughed a little.

"Likewise, Heidi. I'm sorry to have to kick you out, but you better go to Germaine's home. Aleida will meet you there in a minute with the dress."

I nodded my head respectably and walked out of the tent to Germaine's. When I got there, I patted on the skin door to get her attention and waited for Germaine to answer. I waited much longer than I think was necessary before she finally opened the door and answered me. But she didn't talk to me. She just pulled me into the tent and placed me in a certain spot. She looked out the tent, I assumed looking for Aleida. When she didn't see her, she rolled her eyes and went off to another part of the tent to do something else.

I didn't say a word and stood where she put me waiting for Aleida to arrive. In the mean time, I twiddled with my fingers and looked at them, avoiding talking to Germaine as much as possible. I didn't look up until I heard footsteps coming from outside and I smiled when Aleida let herself in and she smiled at me, holding the dress.

"What took you so damn long?" Germaine hissed and Aleida didn't lose her smile.

"Steffen wanted to talk to me about something important. Otto was playing in the woods and got a scrap, but he's alright now." I spoke when Aleida was looking at me.

"Who's Otto?"

"He's my grandson, my eldest son's boy. I'll be sure to introduce you two properly during the wedding." I smiled.

"That would be nice."

"Aleida, she's not here to socialize. She's here to marry Sören and pop out a few kids." Aleida rolled her eyes.

"She's your new daughter, Germaine. Why must you be so rude to her?"

"She's not good enough, that's why I must be so rude to her. I won't apologize for knowing that my son deserves better than a child for a wife."

"In case you haven't noticed, all the girls in the village that are Sören's age are already married. You have to marry a young girl."

"Young's one things. Lacking what a child needs is another thing entirely. Look at her. She has no breasts, no hips, she's a child."

"Maybe, but she'll grow up. And you weren't much older than her when you got married to Kraus."

"That's different. I was physically developed. I wasn't a beanpole."

"Shut up, Germaine. She won't be a beanpole forever. Now stop griping and let's get her dressed and ready. She has a wedding tonight."

I smiled at Aleida gratefully and she winked at me before walking over and helping me get into my dress. When I was dressed, Germaine and Aleida started working on my hair which was wavy and reached down my back. Aleida smiled while she worked on my hair.

"You have such lovely hair, Heidi." I smiled.

"Thank you, Aunty." Germaine gave me a weird look, then looked at Aleida and rolled her eyes and kept working.

When I was ready, I stayed at Germaine's home and helped her with a few things, both of us talking as minimally to each other as possible. As we were working, I heard a large group start to walk through the village. No one panicked about it, so I didn't say anything about it. But a minute or so after I heard the sound, Lord Heidbrier came in. I didn't analyze his appearance at first. But then I noticed a great deal of red. It wasn't just on his hands. It was on his face, his clothes, and it stained his hands. I'd never seen so much blood on a person. It seemed like such an excess of blood for just another day of hunting. When Lord Heidbrier looked at me, he smiled.

"You look perfect, Heidi. You make a stunning bride. I'm sure Sören will be thrilled when he sees you." I smiled politely and didn't speak. "You'll stay here until the ceremony. Just make yourself comfortable until we're ready for you." I nodded my head and Lord Heidbrier left the tent after relieving himself of his weapons.

As he said, I stayed with Germaine and kept helping her around the tent with whatever she told me she needed. A few minutes later, Lord Heidbrier was back and was clean and in clean clothes. He walked over to Germaine and whispered something to her in her ear and she nodded her head in response. She put down what she was doing and walked over to me and grabbed a hold of my hand.

"Come on. The ceremony's going to start soon." She pulled me with her out of the tent and led me to the center of the village that I remembered from yesterday where Lord Heidbrier announced to everyone who I was.

A woman I didn't know handed me a bouquet of daisies and lilacs and placed me at a random spot while people were crowding around. I felt someone coming towards me and looked up to see Sören. His face looked different from what it usually did. He didn't look like he didn't care or that he was bored. He actually looked……guilty. I stared at him questioningly, knowing I wouldn't get him to answer me since we were surrounded by a large crowd of spectators. I heard people walking up behind me and saw a group of women holding buckets and buckets of supplies, from food, to fur, to bone for weaponry, and already completed weapons. This must be my dowry. But I didn't recall my family giving this much. But then…..it clicked in my head and I looked at Sören with stunned eyes. When I realized what was wrong, he avoided eye contact with me.

"You didn't. Please tell me you didn't." He didn't look at me. He just turned his attention to whoever was walking up to us.

"My good people, we are gathered here today to celebrate the union between my youngest son, Sören, and our new member of society, Heidi."

The crowd surrounding us cheered with joy, but I wasn't listening to them. I was staring at Sören with a broken heart. He said he'd spoken to his father about this. I know he said there was no guarantee that he'd made a difference, but still. He was old enough to be one of the warriors in the village. He must have helped in destroying my home. Why else would he look so guilty?

"We've had our quarrels with her people, it's true. But she will be welcomed into our society as the wife of my successor. And now that Braun village is finally gone, we can take the land that is rightfully ours."

I stiffened when he spoke. I was about to drop my bouquet, but Sören grabbed both my hands and bouquet and held them in both his hands so my horror wouldn't be as evident. Not only was I horrified, I was outraged. They went back on their promise. I heard Lord Heidbrier promise my father that nothing would happen to them now that they had me as a gift. I started squeezing my hands, forgetting that Sören was still holding them. He squeezed mine really hard in return for only a moment, letting me know to loosen my grip.

"Marriage is a sacred thing. It's a powerful union that should be treated with the utmost respect." Hypocrite. "It's a gift from the gods above and I'm honored to stand before you all today to unite these youths in matrimony." Lord Heidbrier then turned his attention to Sören. "Sören. Heidi is giving herself to you as your wife and will devote the rest of her life to you. In return, you must be the strong one, the provider. You must swear to hunt, to fight for her, and devote your life and energy to her wellbeing and happiness." Hypocrite!! "You must promise to honor and love her with all your being and be true to her as she will be true to you. Do you swear to do all the things I've instructed of you?" Sören was silent a moment and looked at me. I was still just looking at his hands and mine. Eventually, he nodded and answered, but his voice was monotone and distant.

"I swear to be the provider and protector. To fight for her and devote my life and energy to her wellbeing and happiness. To honor her and love her and be true to her as she will be to me. This I solemnly swear." Lord Heidbrier grinned, then turned his attention to me.

"Heidi. Sören is giving himself to you as your husband and will devote the rest of his life to you. In return, you must be the lover to thank him for his devotion and be a mother. You must love him and give him healthy children and take care of them and help him raise the children to become suitable warriors and members of society." Hypocrite!!!! "You must promise to honor and love him with all your being and be true to him as he will be true to you. Do you swear to do all the things I've instructed of you?"

For a moment, I was dead silent. I finally looked up at Sören. He was staring at me with that same well hidden guilty frown. I started trembling, but not with happiness or giddiness. I was trembling because I was afraid. I didn't want to devote the rest of my life to a man that murdered my family. But saying no to him would mean my own life. I wasn't sure what to do. I was quiet long enough that Lord Heidbrier had to address the crowd with reassuring words.

"She's merely joyful, my people. Give the happy bride a moment to control her happiness." The crowd lost their looks of concern and replaced it with joyous anticipation while I looked back at my hands. Eventually, my silence became too much and Lord Heidbrier lost his patience. "Do you swear to do all the things I've instructed of you, Heidi?"

His tone was harsh, but subtle so that only me and Sören could pick up on it. Finally, Sören squeezed my hands and I looked up at him. His face was apologetic this time, but still well hidden to onlookers other than me. Then he mouthed the words, 'I'm sorry'. I released a breath I realized I was holding. I had no other choice in the matter. I hated myself for the realization, but I was far too selfish to die now. Even if I died standing up for myself. So I swallowed my hate and pride and said the words everyone was waiting for me to say.

"I swear. I swear to be a lover to him and be grateful. To give him strong, healthy children and help raise them to be strong. To honor and love him with all my being and be true to him as he will be true to me. This I solemnly swear." Lord Heidbrier finally smiled again and began to speak.

"You've heard it from their lips. They've sworn before witnesses and the gods that they will be happy in marriage and devote themselves to one another until death forces them apart. If anyone wishes to speak against this union, make yourself known, or forever hold your piece."

I hoped with all my heart that someone would speak. Anyone, I didn't care who. Even if Germaine did, insisting that I wasn't worthy of wedding her son. I didn't care. But a silence was about the crowd and I felt myself getting heavier and heavier as the burden of what I was allowing to happen started weighing on my shoulders. I felt tears beginning to form in my eyes, but I fought them back with all my might. When no one spoke, Lord Heidbrier ended the ceremony.

"Then by the power vested in me by the grace of the heavens and as your devoted leader, I now pronounce my son, Sören of Heidbrier and Heidi of Braun, husband and wife. Sören, you may now kiss your bride."

The crowd around us started clapping their hands and cheering our names. I never looked up until I felt Sören's hand on my chin and it pulled my face upward to look at him. He kept the kiss fast and light. No intimacy of any kind. It was a simple peck and he stood tall again, still holding my hands and releasing my chin. Lord Heidbrier announced to everyone to clear the way for the feast that had been prepared for tonight's event and everyone moved aside and took a seat in the large clearing in the middle of the village.

Of course, me and Sören were placed on a large fur blanket with the fire that was made closest to us, making us the center of attention. Lord Heidbrier made toasts and random comments about me and Sören on occasion that would earn a cheer from the crowd. The food was passed around to everyone so we all got a portion of the day's earnings and the food stolen from my village. I didn't touch my dinner. I couldn't even imagine eating. My stomach felt weak and my head was spinning from the reality of what happened. I hated myself in so many ways in that moment. I was a coward for allowing my fear to control my thinking and marry Sören. There was no way to justify my actions, not that I would dream of trying.

"Heidi." I was taken out of my daze when Sören said my name. I looked up at him, letting him know I was listening. "Try to eat something. We'll talk when we get to the tent."

I felt my blood boil. His voice was so calm and unfazed. I wanted so badly to hit him, but I settled for placing my plate of food on the ground in front of me and looking forward. Sören noticed this and rolled his eyes.

"Heidi, don't be difficult. I know you're mad, but try not to act like it. At least not in front of anyone else."

"You wouldn't want anyone to think your pretty little wife is unhappy, now would you?" My comment was fierce and sarcastic. He slammed his plate on the ground and I looked at him, startled by the sounds. His face terrified me. He was glaring at the plate, but it was really aimed at me. And it was the scariest face I'd ever seen.

"Father." I felt myself begin to tremble and I looked away. I didn't want to watch.

"What is it, Sören?" With a voice calm as water, Sören responded.

"I would like to turn in early if you don't mind, and be alone with my wife." I heard Lord Heidbrier laugh a little to himself.

"Of course son. How rude of me to not think about such a thing. Please, enjoy yourself. The rest of us will stay here and enjoy the rest of the feast."

"Thanks, father." Then, Sören grabbed a tight hold of my arm and pulled me to my feet and with him back to our tent while the people in the circle continued to eat to celebrate.

His grip on me was tight and inescapable. I felt my arm getting numb as he pulled me along. I was still shaking because I wasn't sure what he would do. The fact that I was about to get a beating was obvious, but I wasn't sure how long or how severe. He could finish after one slap or he might not be satisfied until he's beaten me within an inch of my life. I had no way of knowing. When we reached the tent, he opened the door and practically hurled me at the bed. I stayed down, hoping that would make it go by faster. I waited for something to happen, but the punches never came. I finally looked up and say Sören standing above me with a look of death.

"I never said I could make my father change his mind. But I did try. I won't tolerate such blatant disrespect from you that I don't deserve."

"You killed my family. You deserve every ounce of my contempt." I said this while keeping my face covered with only my eyes showing and lying on the ground in a defensive manner.

"I did no such thing. I helped gather all the supplies father wanted. In the time I was there, I only killed an old man and a rebellious little boy." My eyes widened. Rebellious little boy? He didn't…..

"Did he have brown hair, brown eyes and reach up to your hip?" Sören was silent a moment as he thought.

"What about it?" The pain in my chest became greater. He really had. Adalwulf. My little brother. He didn't deserve this. He was just a child eagerly awaiting becoming a man just like father.

"You killed Adalwulf."

"Who?"

"Adalwulf! My little brother, you killed him!" Even though I was screaming, he held his ground. I was shaking violently and my tears that I'd been holding back all night were flowing freely. I hated him. I would never forgive him for this. No matter how great a husband Aleida promised he would be, he would always be a monster in my eyes.

"That's what I do, Heidi. I was raised to be a fighter and to take what's rightfully mine."

"It wasn't yours to take. That land was ours. We found it and rested there fairly."

"My father saw it and wanted it. I can't help that. And I have no intention of questioning him. And I won't have you questioning me. I don't have to keep you."

"Fine. Don't keep me, then. Throw me away, just like any other person you see as nothing more than an animal. Beat me, rape me, kill me, do your worst." We were glaring at each other for a long time after that. He was speechless and I didn't want to talk anymore.

After several minutes of just glaring, he closed the distance between us and grabbed a hold of my hair and pulled me up so I was in a sitting position. My hands went to his in my hair, trying to lessen the pain. His other hand reached up and I closed my eyes, waiting for what was to come. But when moments passed and nothing happened, I opened my eyes and realized he wasn't looking at me anymore. He was looking at the ground breathing heavily.

What he did next took me completely by surprise. He forced my face to his and he kissed me. My eyes were wide the whole time. He forced his tongue passed my lips and trailed around. I tried pulling away, but the grip he hand on my head made it impossible. Eventually, he finally let go of me, but it was hardly gentle. He threw me to the ground as he released me and when I was down, he took a hold of my arms and held them behind my back and rested a great deal of his weight on top of me. I was having a hard time breathing now. Then he brought his lips to my ear and bit down. It was painful, but didn't draw blood.

"You remember your place, Heidi. You're my wife and you will honor me, regardless of your personal feelings and you will honor me in front of everyone and do as I say, when I say, without question. You may have a great deal of power over the townspeople now, but you're still below me and you always will be. Don't make me have to remind you of that again."

Finally, he let go of me and lifted his weight off me. When my arms were free, I took them away from my back and brought them up around my head taking in big gulps of air. He didn't leave like I was hoping he would. He simply rolled off me and stayed where he was next to me on the bed. When I'd breathed in enough air and I was finally beginning to feel a little stable, he took a hold of me again. But this time, it was simply his arm wrapping around me gently with his face resting against my hair.

"Please leave me alone." He shook his head.

"No." I didn't argue any further. I simply laid there and tried to breath. Then he tightened his hold on me in a way that made me think he was hugging me. "I'm sorry. I don't want our marriage to start like this."

"What does it matter? You don't love me." I was surprised I had the courage to talk to him after what had just happened.

"That's not the point. I don't want to be like my parents. I don't want to have the same relationship as my brothers have with their wives. They're all miserable and they hate each other. I want to be like Aunty and Uncle. They're happy."

"Throwing me against the wall isn't exactly a way to make a woman love you."

"I don't expect you to love me. I know you won't. But I do want you to respect me. Maybe even go so far as to think of me as a friend. A companion. Maybe we won't love each other, but we can still be happy."

"How can I be happy? You murdered my family."

"I said I'm sorry. That doesn't make up for anything and I know that. But there's nothing more I can do but tell you I'm sorry and ask you to forgive me. I'll get on my knees, kiss your feet, and beg if that's what it takes. But please."

"I never wanted what my parents had either. But that's not something I can control."

"It's something I can and will control. I don't want you to be unhappy. I want you to be happy. I want my brothers' wives to see you smile and envy you. I want my brothers to envy what I have, knowing that I'm a better man than they'll ever be because I'm doing something to make my wife happy."

"You're asking too much." He nodded.

"Maybe I am. But I'll make you a promise right here and now."

"What's that?"

"Anything you want, it's yours. Any object that catches your heart is yours for the taking. Simply ask." I shook my head.

"Bribing me won't earn my love or respect."

"Then tell me what will." I was quiet a moment. I wasn't sure what to say to him. I didn't want to give him what he wanted. Not after what he'd done. Instead of telling him that, I gave him an answer that was just as true.

"I don't know." He released a breath that he'd been holding in and tightened the grip for only a moment.

"I'll find a way. I swear I will." I didn't say another word and neither did he. He held me to his chest the whole night through. I finally fell asleep after laying awake staring at the wall thinking about my family.

When I was asleep, my dreams were filled with memories. No one would ever consider yelling at Adalwulf and getting swatted by mother a happy memory. But it was all I had left of them. The memories, good and bad, and I would take them and remember them happily. When I woke up, I was surprised to feel something warm around my waist. I opened my eyes and saw that it was an arm. I looked over my shoulder and saw Sören lying there, still asleep.

I looked at his face a moment and saw something that I didn't see when he was awake. He looked tormented. Heartbroken even. It was like looking at the face of a broken man who had no hope at all. Looking at him made me hurt all over. I couldn't believe it, but I felt immense pity for him. While I looked at his face, I did a great deal of thinking. I thought about Aleida and Steffen. She admitted that they weren't in love. But they looked like they were. When Steffen looked at Aleida, he would always smiled kindly and she would smile back. It wasn't awkward or painful. It was friendly and kind. The more I thought about it, the more appealing it became to me.

I wanted so badly to be happy, but the prospect seemed farfetched. How could I forgive him? How could I bury that and smile and him pretending that it didn't bother me? I couldn't. Plain and simple. While I was watching him, he suddenly opened his eyes and I gasped and jumped before calming back down. He lifted himself out of bed and walked over to the door and looked out, I suppose to estimate what time it was. The sun wouldn't be of good. I could already tell, even from this distance, that it was foggy outside. When he'd seen all he wanted, he closed the door and walked back over to me.

"Father and the others got plenty of meat for us. And they brought some fresh water, so you don't have to worry about getting any."

"Sören?" He looked up at me.

"What?" I took a deep breath and lifted myself out of bed and walked over to him. When I was close enough, I started looking at my hands and intertwined my fingers repeatedly in nervousness.

"Last night. You said you wanted to be like Aunty and Uncle." I simply nodded. "I don't want to be like your parents. Aunty told me all about them. I don't want that."

"Neither do I."

"I don't want to be like my parents either. I don't want our relationship to comprise of random glaring and never talking at all."

"Neither do I." I took a deep breath and finally looked up at him.

"I want to be more like Aunty and Uncle. Maybe not in love, but at least happy." For the first time since I'd seen him, Sören smiled at me. It was a sweet smile that made me think of a happy little boy that I think he never had a chance to be.

"I'll do whatever I can to make you happy, Heidi. I swear." I finally smiled too.

"Me too." After looking at each other with a smile for a moment, Sören took me in his arms in a hug and held me tightly. I wrapped my arms around his waist and rested my head against his chest.

I wasn't sure if I could ever forgive him. But at least I could put the past behind me and only look towards the future. I hoped that mother was wrong and that maybe, just maybe, I wouldn't be just a pretty thing that's meant to stay barefoot and pregnant. Maybe instead of a king that ruled my life, I would have a friend. A friend was certainly better than nothing at all. And I suddenly felt grateful to have a friend that promised to be there for me and to make me happy.

"Just promise me one thing."

"Yeah, Heidi?" I took a deep breath.

"Aunty tells me that Lord Heidbrier hits Germaine a lot." Sören was silent a moment.

"From time to time. I try not to notice."

"I know father used to do it to mother too. And I suspect your brothers do that too." He nodded.

"I've heard it going on."

"I was hoping……that you might never do that to me. I think I might think of you the way you want if you don't hit me." Sören laughed a little. Once again, it made me think of the child he never was able to be.

"I won't hurt a hair on your head." I smiled a little more and hugged him tighter.

"I think this might just work."

"I think so too."