Prelude

X-Naut and Yuxette are spending time in the lobby of the fortress. X-Naut is tossing discs across the room and Yuxette is firing laser rings at them.

X-NAUT: OK, Yuxette, now try to shoot this one! *throws disc into air*

YUXETTE: Yux! (Got it!) *fires laser ring*

The ring hits its target, and the saucer shatters into pieces.

X-NAUT: Wow, nice shot, Yuxette! You're getting really good!

YUXETTE: *bounces* Yux! Yux! (Yay! I'm improving!)

Then the chief enters the room.

CHIEF: Hey! What are you two goofing off for?

X-NAUT: What? Chief? Why are you here?

CHIEF: I came here to tell you that Sir Grodus wants to see you.

X-NAUT: Really? Sir Grodus wants to see…me? Why?

CHIEF: I was wondering that myself. Now get to it!

X-NAUT: OK, then. *turns to Yuxette* Wait here for me, OK, Yuxette?

YUXETTE: Yux. (OK.)

X-Naut walks out the door of the lobby and down the hallway. Other X-Nauts lingering in the hallway discuss the events of the day at Rogueport. One X-Naut directs X-Naut (the main character, that is) to the sublevel that contains Sir Grodus's room. X-Naut goes to the 2nd sublevel and reaches his destination. When he enters the room, he sees Grodus on his throne and another X-Naut standing nearby. It turns out to be none other than X-Naut White.

X-NAUT: Umm… Sir Grodus? Did you call for me?

GRODUS: Ah, yes. You. Now, you are the same X-Naut who defeated those Smorgs yesterday, correct?

X-NAUT: Umm…yes…?

GRODUS: I see. Now, young X-Naut, I can tell that you have great promise inside of you. So I've decided to give you a special mission.

X-NAUT: ?

GRODUS: Yes, indeed I have. Now, you do know of the Crystal Star we have been researching in Hooktail Castle, do you not?

X-NAUT: …No, not really… Wait, a Crystal Star…?

GRODUS: Of course you know of it. Your special mission is…I want you to go to the Petal Meadows near the castle and find out as much of this Crystal Star as you possibly can.

X-NAUT: Well, umm…OK, I guess. Do I have to get the Crystal Star?

GRODUS: No. You merely have to obtain information about it. But if you do find a way to infiltrate the castle and claim the Crystal Star, then inform me immediately. X-Naut White, you may give him his supplies now.

X-Naut White walks toward X-Naut and hands him a computer disc. X-Naut obtained the map! This fits into X-Naut's Database and provides him with a map of the region. White also gives X-Naut a peculiar handheld device. X-Naut obtained the Mailbox DS! This not only allows X-Naut to send and receive wireless e-mail, but it also allows him to communicate with someone face-to-face via the top screen, but only if that someone has another Mailbox DS.

GRODUS: Use that Mailbox DS to communicate with me. My computer will produce a projection of you, so make sure you use the visual chat feature. Oh, and I'm sure you've already met, but this is X-Naut White. He'll watch over you on missions such as this, so don't be afraid to consult him for help. You may also receive items or e-mail from him. Do you understand all this?

X-NAUT: Yes, Sir Grodus.

GRODUS: Then you may go! Your mission starts now!

X-NAUT: *turns and walks toward door, but stops and turns around* Ummm… Two questions, Sir Grodus.

GRODUS: Yes, what is it?

X-NAUT: First one: Where's Petal Meadows?

GRODUS: What?! You don't know? Sigh… I suppose it would be fine if X-Naut White was to escort you there, correct, X-Naut White?

WHITE: Yes, Sir Grodus. I will escort him.

X-NAUT: …OK, and the second one: Can I take Yuxette with me?

GRODUS: What? Yuxette? Who? Oh, that Yux who hangs out with you… Fine, whatever.

X-NAUT: Thank you, sir.

The two X-Nauts salute in the cross-armed position, turn around, and head out the door. They reappear in the lobby, where the chief and Yuxette are waiting.

CHIEF: So? What happened?

X-NAUT: *walks over to Yuxette and turns to chief* Nothing much… Sir Grodus just gave me my own mission.

CHIEF: *jumps* What?! He did?! Now why would Sir Grodus do something like that?

X-NAUT: I don't know. *turns to Yuxette* C'mon, Yuxette. We're going to Petal Meadows!

YUXETTE: Yux! (Yayness!)

X-Naut and Yuxette start walking towards X-Naut White, but then the chief speaks again.

CHIEF: Ahem! Wait just a moment, you!

X-NAUT & YUXETTE: *turn around to face chief*

CHIEF: *walks up to X-Naut* Umm… Before you go, I should give this to you. *gives a badge to X-Naut*

X-Naut got Power Slam! [Enables Power Slam, which lets X-Naut slam an enemy with great power. Wearing two or more increases attack power.]

CHIEF: This is what's called a badge. If you wear a lot of them, you can do better in battle. So, do you need to learn how to equip and remove badges?

X-NAUT: Yes.

The chief explains to X-Naut about badges. Author's Note (2017): I guess I wasn't bothering with the long tutorials anymore.

X-NAUT: Hmm… I see. But why are you giving this to me, Chief?

CHIEF: Because you'll probably need it! And also, I'm on probation, so I need to make a good impression.

X-NAUT: Oh…

WHITE: Ahem! Pardon the interruption, but X-Naut, you have a mission to get to. So please, follow me.

X-Naut and Yuxette follow X-Naut White out the door, heading for their first real adventure.

CHAPTER 1
AN INVESTIGATOR'S TALE

Part 1: Petal Meadows

X-Naut, Yuxette, and X-Naut White pop out of a pipe that emerges from a patch of grass. They leap off the pipe and take a look at the immense fields of green grass and yellow flowers. Right near them, some trees stand behind some brown fence posts.

X-NAUT: So this is Petal Meadows… It's so pretty…and peaceful…and nice-smelling…unlike the X-Naut Fortress.

YUXETTE: Yux… (So true…)

WHITE: Yeah… Ahem! But let's not get sidetracked! You must investigate Petal Meadows and see if you can find out anything about the Crystal Star. And remember: as soon as you learn anything, contact Sir Grodus via your Mailbox DS.

X-Naut and Yuxette hop down some ledges where they come to a bunch of stones. A couple of the stones have weirdly-shaped holes in them. Off in the background is a big castle.

X-NAUT & YUXETTE: *spot the castle* !

X-NAUT: Look, Yuxette! That castle… It must be Hooktail Castle!

YUXETTE: Yux! Yux! (Yeah! I bet you're right!)

X-NAUT: Yes… But how do we get over there? I don't see any way across.

YUXETTE: …Yux? (…How about those stones?)

X-NAUT: *turns to Yuxette* Really? *turns to stones* You think these stones might have something to do with it? *looks around stones* Um, OK, but it doesn't look like we can do anything with them right now. *walks back to Yuxette* Let's just search more around Petal Meadows and see what we can find out.

YUXETTE: Yux! (All righty!)

They follow a light dirt path beyond the stones, trotting in between the yellow fields of flowers. Along the way they battle Goombas, Spiky Goombas, and Paragoombas. The enemies are pretty weak, so X-Naut and Yuxette triumph with ease. They come to softly flowing river with no visible way across. X-Naut parts some nearby bushes to find another green pipe. When he goes through, he emerges through the other end in a point in the background. He walks across the faraway hills until he reaches a switch and activates it. Paper pages start flipping above the river, cycling through a bridge construction. When the bridge is complete, X-Naut returns to the middle ground and crosses with Yuxette.

They soon find themselves in a small, peaceful town. Yellow-brick houses lie along some upper ledges, while townsfolk walk to and fro on the lower ground. One such citizen, a Koopa, walks up and greets X-Naut and Yuxette.

KOOPA: Welcome, travelers! Welcome to Petalburg! We sure have been getting more of you lately… Ever since that dragon Hooktail was spotted here, we've had almost no visitors… But now, people seem to be coming through more rapidly. I'm telling you, folks, Hooktail is no attraction! Even though that should be obvious…

X-NAUT: So Hooktail's a dragon? Cool… And Hooktail Castle sounds like the perfect place for it to coop up. So, umm, Mr. Koopa…do you know anything about a Crystal Star?

KOOPA: Crystal Star, you say? Funny you should mention that. A mustachioed man and a Goomba girl came through here earlier asking about the same thing.

X-NAUT & YUXETTE: ?

KOOPA: And I'll tell you the same thing I told them: I don't know about any Crystal Star, but I bet the mayor does. He's really old, so he knows all kinds of things we don't. Koopas of his age are…really smart. He lives in the pink house just up ahead.

X-NAUT: A pink house? Weird…but it shouldn't be too hard to find. So…thanks for your help!

X-Naut and Yuxette explore the town, crossing a small bridge over a river that divides the area into thirds, forking midway. The duo takes a rest at the inn, goes shopping, and finds a Koopa Paratroopa flying right outside the rightmost house. He wears an orange shell, blue shoes, and some electric-blue glasses

PARATROOPA: Yo, what's up? Say, you dudes are mighty strange-looking, at least for this town. You must not be from around here, right?

X-NAUT: Um, yeah, we're not.

PARATROOPA: Didn't think so. It must feel awesome to travel the world, see the sights, and have adventures… Am I right, man?

X-NAUT: Uh…

PARATROOPA: Yeah, it's cool.

X-NAUT: …

YUXETTE: Yux! (Ask him about the Crystal Star!)

X-NAUT: …Oh, right, um… Hey, would you happen to know anything about a Crystal Star?

PARATROOPA: Huh? Now where did a question like that come from? Oh, I get it! You dudes like adventuring to the extreme, right? Sweeeeet. Anyway, sure I know some stuff about the legend…

A Koopa girl with a blonde ponytail, purple shell and white boots walks past them.

PARATROOPA: *watches her go* Hey, check out that cute chick! Total hottie, am I right? *turns to X-Naut* Sorry 'bout this, but I gotta fly. See you in a few! *turns back and flies after girl*

X-NAUT: …

YUXETTE: …Yux. (…Typical guy.)

X-Naut and Yuxette walk to the other side of Petalburg and see more houses, one of them being pink. They go inside that house and find a small, elderly Koopa with large, white eyebrows.

KROOP: Eh? Who's there? Is someone there? Ah! I know! You're thieves, eh? Come to rob an old, defenseless Koopa, have you? Despicable!

X-NAUT: *jumps back in surprise and shakes head*

KROOP: Well, away with you! I haven't anything to steal, except for a little money and my antique shell… Take them, you fiends! But just leave the photos of me and the missus. Can't do without those memories.

X-NAUT: H-hey! We're not thieves! Honestly! We just wanted to ask you about a Crystal Star!

KROOP: What's that? Not thieves, you say? Searching for the Crystal Stars, are you? Well, why didn't you pipe up before, you ijit! We're just wasting time here! Now let's see here, the Crystal Stars… Oh, of course! Hooktail! Hooktail's got what you want!

X-NAUT: Hooktail? Ummm… We kind of already figured that…

KROOP: You did? Then why did you bother coming here in the first place? I don't have anything more to tell you than that. Oh, by the way, what's your name, sonny?

X-NAUT: Uh… X-Naut.

KROOP: X-hm? What did you say your name was? Speak up!

X-NAUT: It's X-Naut!

KROOP: X-Nut? Now that's a funny name, there. Well, X-Nut…you asking me about the Crystal Stars reminded me that a man came here earlier today and asked about 'em, too. Now what was his name again? Murphy? Well anyways, I can tell you that he had a big mustache, and he was wearing a red hat and blue overalls. You know him, X-Nut?

X-NAUT: …No, I don't think so…

KROOP: You do know him? Well, no wonder then! You must be a friend of his. Well, your friend, Murphy, has already gone to Hooktail Castle to get rid of that beast Hooktail and claim the Crystal Star. A reckless fool—I mean, a brave adventurer he is!

X-NAUT: …

KROOP: So, hey, if you're a friend of his, does this mean you're going to help him rough it up with Hooktail? Mind you, he could probably use all the help he can get.

X-NAUT: Well, I don't really suppose… I mean, he's not really my friend…

KROOP: This is great news indeed! Why, if you were to help Murphy get rid of Hooktail, we'd shower you with rewards and gratitude! What's that? You'll accept no reward, you say?

X-NAUT: Ack, uh, well, um, I, whuh?

KROOP: What an unselfish person you are, X-Nut! You're noble, indeed… Yep, a good egg. Well, to get to Hooktail Castle, you must have the stone keys. The stone keys lie in Shhwonk Fortress, just a ways east of this village. So, what are you waiting for, X-Nut? Hurry and get those keys so you can catch up to Murphy!

X-NAUT: Umm…yeah, uh, we'll do that.


Author's Note (2005): Now that we're settled in Petalburg, it's time for something a little different. If any of you have played Fire Emblem, you'll know what support conversations are. If not, no big deal. I've decided to make some support conversations between the main characters. As of now, it's only X-Naut and Yuxette. Here we go!

X-NAUT: …

YUXETTE: Yux! (Hi, X-Naut!)

X-NAUT: *jumps and turns to Yuxette* Wha! Oh, hi, Yuxette.

YUXETTE: Yux? (Did I startle you?)

X-NAUT: Oh, well…kinda.

YUXETTE: Yux. Yux. (Oh, sorry. I didn't mean to.)

X-NAUT: It's OK. I know you mean well.

YUXETTE: Yux! (I sure do!) Yux! Yux! (Hey, that was a compliment! Thanks!)

X-NAUT: You're welcome. …

YUXETTE: …Yux? (...So, whatcha thinking about?)

X-NAUT: It's nothing.

YUXETTE: Yux? Yux! Yux! (Nothing? I know you better than that, X-Naut! Tell me what's on your mind!)

X-NAUT: Really, Yuxette, it's nothing you need to worry about.

YUXETTE: Yux! (If it worries you, then it's my concern as well!) Yux! Yux! (We're friends, after all! Whatever happens, we take it together!)

X-NAUT: …Yeah, you're right. Gee, Yuxette… How is it that you seem so…sure of yourself?

YUXETTE: Yux? Yux! (Why shouldn't I be? As long as we're together, there's nothing we can't accomplish!)

X-NAUT: …Haha! You're just bursting with confidence, aren't you? Well, I'm glad to have you as a friend, Yuxette.

YUXETTE: Yux! (Same here!)

X-NAUT: *turns away* Well, it's about time we got back to our job. Let's get to it! *walks off*

YUXETTE: Yux! (You got it!) ! Yux! Yux! (Wait, X-Naut! You didn't tell me what was on your mind!)


Part 2: Mystery Trail

X-Naut and Yuxette leave the mayor's house and look at each other.

X-NAUT: OK, that was weird. So, just who is this Murphy guy? He sounds like he's after the Crystal Stars, but he doesn't sound like an X-Naut.

YUXETTE: Yux… (I think you're right...)

VOICE: Oh, hey! You two! You're the dudes who wanted to know about the Crystal Stars, right?

X-NAUT & YUXETTE: ? *look at source of voice*

The orange-shelled Paratroopa flies over to them from the large house next door. The purple-shelled Koopa girl is nowhere to be seen, although there does appear to be a slap mark on the Paratroopa's cheek.

PARATROOPA: Well, sorry about the delay, dude. I had…business to take care of. Anyways, about the Crystal Stars… Well, I'm sure you've heard the legend of Rogueport, haven't you?

X-NAUT: *shakes head*

PARATROOPA: No? You really aren't from around here, are you? Well, I've heard the legend, and if you want info about the Crystal Stars, then the legend's the first thing you gotta know!

X-NAUT: …

PARATROOPA: All right then, I'll fill you in… It started, I guess, about a thousand years ago. There was this totally perfect city sitting all by itself, when all of a sudden, BOOM! A great cataclysm struck it and the city sunk below the sea. After a wicked-long time, the town of Rogueport was built above it. But the people got word that an awesome treasure lay hidden below in the ruins of that city. But the treasure was sealed behind the Thousand-Year Door. The door won't open…unless someone collects the seven Crystal Stars! Then the door will unlock! So, how's that for a legend, huh?

X-NAUT: Hmm… Interesting, but it sounds somehow…familiar. So the seven Crystal Stars will unlock the Thousand-Year Door…

PARATROOPA: That's it, dude! Oh yeah, I forgot, there's also something called the Magical Map that shows where the Crystal Stars are! But nobody's ever seen it, man.

X-NAUT: A magical map?

YUXETTE: ! Yux! Yux… (X-Naut! That map…and that man…)

X-NAUT: *turns to Yuxette* Hey, that's right! This mustachioed man that the mayor spoke of…

YUXETTE: Yux… (If he's looking for the Crystal Stars…)

X-NAUT: Then you don't suppose…

YUXETE: Yux… (He has…)

X-NAUT: The Magical Map?

PARATROOPA: Uh…wha?

X-NAUT: That would explain it… In any case, we'd better head to Shhwonk Fortress and get those stone keys! Then we can catch up with that guy before he gets the Crystal Star! Let's go, Yuxette!

YUXETTE: Yux! (Right behind you!)

X-Naut and Yuxette run off through Petalburg, leaving the Paratroopa behind, looking after them.

PARATROOPA: …OK, not sure if I caught all that, but that mustachioed guy…could he be…the dude she talked about?

X-Naut's sprint is interrupted by a ringtone going off. X-Naut got an e-mail!

X-NAUT: *pulls out Mailbox DS and opens it*

MESSAGE:

XNDM Registration

Attention, Mr. X-NAUT! We offer you congratulations for registering with the XNDM (X-Naut Direct Mail) service. Your trusted comrade, MR. WHITE, referred you to us.

Our local spy system will keep us—and you in return—updated with news from all over the world!

We hope you enjoy our service! Now get back to work!

**************************************
Published by the X-Ray Today Committee
**************************************

X-Naut puts away his DS and continues until he and Yuxette reach the gate at the end of the village. A Koopa is on guard.

KOOPA: An old stronghold called Shhwonk Fortress lies ahead. A stone creature lives there. At least, it USED to live there. Some mustache man went there earlier and defeated it. But if you still want to go there, I'll let you through. *pushes gate open*

X-Naut and Yuxette follow the path to Shhwonk Fortress. They battle Goombas and their first Koopa Troopa enemies along the way. Eventually, they reach an old, stony building with two pedestals inside. Two bald creatures with cleft chins stand on top of the pedestals. When X-Naut examines them, the Bald Clefts suddenly spring to life and attack.

BATTLE MODE ENTERED!

X-Naut and Yuxette face off against the Bald Clefts. The two heroes switch positions so X-Naut is behind Yuxette.

Yuxette used Duplicate! A Mini-Yux appears, producing a barrier around Yuxette at the cost of 1 FP!

X-Naut used Power Slam! -2 FP. NICE! The first Bald Cleft loses 2 HP, causing it to faint!

The other Bald Cleft used Rock Charge on Yuxette, since she's in front. The Mini-Yux took the attack and fainted!

X-Naut switches back to the front and uses Power Slam! NICE! It uses up the last 2 FP, but the second Bald Cleft is defeated!

BATTLE MODE END!

After the Bald Clefts disappear, a yellowish, crescent-shaped stone falls from the ceiling and the gate at the end of the room opens. X-Naut obtains the Moon Stone and continues along the next path. Eventually our two heroes enter another building of Shhwonk Fortress, also with two pedestals. When X-Naut checks them, the two spikey stone creatures on top of the pedestals come to life and attack.

BATTLE MODE ENTERED!

The opponents are Bristles, enemies that, because of their spikes, can't be jumped on OR tackled from the front.

X-Naut used a POW Block! This item shakes the ground when hit, causing the Bristles to tumble upside-down and lose 2 HP each, defeating them both!

BATTLE MODE END!

A spiky orange stone falls from the ceiling, but the gate at the end of the room doesn't open. X-Naut obtains the Sun Stone and heads back down the path to Petalburg. After running back through town and reaching the bridge in Petal Meadows, they hear a voice all of a sudden.

VOICE: Hey! You two!

X-NAUT & YUXETTE: ?

A young Koopa Troopa walks across the bridge towards them. The Troopa is wearing, instead of a turtle shell, half of an eggshell on his head and the other half in place of pants. X-Naut and Yuxette look at him.

TROOPA: Just who're you guys? And what are you doing here? This is the future site of King Bowser's picnic!

YUXETTE: Yux? (Huh?)

X-NAUT: Who are you?

TROOPA: Listen, pal, my name's Jr. Troopa! And you've got some guts, strolling through here like you own the place! I'm on guard, and you're trespassing! Suffer the consequences!

BATTLE MODE ENTERED! AGAIN!

X-Naut and Yuxette face Jr. Troopa this time.

JR. TROOPA: You chose the wrong guy to mess with today, pal! You're about to see what happens when you get in the way of the Koopa clan!

X-NAUT: *uses Tattle Log* That's Jr. Troopa. He's a young Koopa who still carries his eggshell around, but he thinks he's pretty tough. Max HP is 10, attack is 1, and defense is 0. Not much to boast about. Still, this guy…what's his deal? He said he was guarding a picnic site. What kind of job is that? And who did he say he was working for? I forget… But still, he doesn't seem to be too good at his job. Just because you're a guard doesn't mean you attack everyone in sight! But I doubt he'll listen to us, so we'll just have to fight it out.

Yuxette used Laser Ring! NICE! Jr. Troopa lost 2 HP!

Jr. Troopa used Headbutt on X-Naut! Owch! X-Naut lost 1 HP!

X-Naut slams Jr. Troopa! NICE! Jr. Troopa took 2 damage!

Yuxette used Laser Ring! NICE hit! Jr. Troopa is down to 4 HP!

Jr. Troopa headbutts X-Naut! NICE Guard! X-Naut took no damage!

X-Naut used Power Slam! -2 FP. NICEly done! Jr. Troopa lost 4 HP, which means he's defeated!

BATTLE MODE END! AGAIN!

JR. TROOPA: OWWWWW! You're tougher than you look, buddy! But if I ever see you again, you'll be…sorry… *collapses*

YUXETTE: Yux… (Weird guy…)

X-NAUT: OOOOOOOOOO-K… What do you think that guy's problem was?

X-Naut and Yuxette leave behind the dizzy Troopa and get back to their mission.


Part 3: Hooktail Castle

X-Naut and Yuxette run through Petal Meadows, trying to avoid the Goombas. They eventually reach the stones in the proximity of Hooktail Castle again. X-Naut goes to the rocks and places the two stone keys into the niches. The two stones slowly roll back, revealing two switches. A message appears on the center stone.

VOICE: Oh! X-Naut!

X-Naut and Yuxette turn to see who has spoken. X-Naut White walks over to them.

WHITE: So, you're back? Did you uncover anything about the Crystal Star?

X-NAUT: Well…kinda.

WHITE: Is that so… What did you find out?

X-NAUT: …Well, it's…not exactly…easy to tell…

YUXETTE: Yux! (Someone else is after the Crystal Star!)

WHITE: Pardon? Is your Yux trying to tell me something, X-Naut?

X-NAUT: …OK, see, there's this mustached guy that we heard about… *tells White what they discovered*

WHITE: Hmm… I see. So someone else is after the Crystal Star…

YUXETTE: Yux! (That's what I said!)

WHITE: And what are you planning to do now? Were you thinking of pursuing this person in the hopes of stopping him? Or perhaps…obtaining the Crystal Star first?

X-NAUT: Well…yeah, something like that.

WHITE: Foolish. You know you're supposed to contact Sir Grodus and tell him this news before any other action is commenced.

X-NAUT: But…that could take too long! That person could be in the castle right now, fighting Hooktail!

WHITE: And do you think he's capable of defeating Hooktail?

X-NAUT: …

YUXETTE: Yux? (Would you take that chance?)

WHITE: …What did your Yux say?

X-NAUT: She said, "Would you take that chance?"

WHITE: Hm. If you really believe the situation is that dire, then perhaps you should go ahead. I'll contact Sir Grodus for you.

X-NAUT: Oh, thanks!

WHITE: No thanks are necessary. I am merely doing my job. *walks to the stone with the message on it* Now, to enter Hooktail Castle, you'll have to heed this message. *reads message* "Here beginneth the path to dread Hooktail Castle. Weaklings, retreateth! Ye who seeketh to proceed: a power of two must hitteth both switches simultaneously. *** Addendum *** If ye are a Petalburg Koopa, huzzah! Your HOLD ability maketh this chore a snap!" *turns to X-Naut*

X-NAUT: A Petalburg Koopa?

WHITE: Needless to say, you don't have a Koopa with a Hold ability. *turns to Yuxette* You do, however, have a Yux with a Charge ability. I'll leave this riddle for you to figure out. *steps aside*

X-Naut uses Yuxette's ability to charge a laser ring at one switch while he runs to the other. Yuxette fires at the switch and X-Naut jumps on the other switch at the same time. The center stone breaks away, revealing a pipe.

WHITE: Very good. This pipe will take you to Hooktail Castle.

X-NAUT: *hops on the pipe* Thanks for your help! *goes into pipe with Yuxette*

WHITE: … *turns and walks away without contacting Grodus*

X-Naut and Yuxette appear in the background, where they enter the castle. After walking through the tall, stone gatehouse, X-Naut and Yuxette find themselves at the castle's moat. A wooden bridge is the only visible way across, and it's broken in the middle. A large oak doorway, the real entrance to the castle, stands on the other side of the moat. X-Naut gazes at the size of the colossal stone walls that stretch to the clouds.

X-NAUT: Wow… This place looks pretty frightening…but also pretty majestic, too. Do you know what I mean?

YUXETTE: Yux… (I guess…)

X-NAUT: Look! The drawbridge is broken…so we can't get across. Any ideas, Yuxette?

YUXETTE: Yux… (Uh, not really…)

X-NAUT & YUXETTE: …

After much thinking, they turn around and head back into the gatehouse. But when they enter, another voice shouts to them…

VOICE: Hey, you two!

X-Naut and Yuxette look across the room and see the Paratroopa flapping just above the ground. He flies over to the duo.

X-NAUT: Huh? You again?

YUXETTE: Yux? (Yeah?)

PARATROOPA: Uh, yeah, it's me again. I sorta followed you dudes back here, and I overheard you talking about a broken bridge… So I figured, hey! Why don't I give you a little lift across?

X-NAUT: Really? You'd do that for us?

PARATROOPA: Sure, dudes! But only on one condition… You let me come along with you for the rest of the journey in that castle!

X-NAUT & YUXETTE: !

PARATROOPA: Let me explain. The name's Parakete. I'm not from around here, either. Now, I've got the looks, the moves, and the 'tude, but I just don't have the action, know what I mean? What I mean is: Parakete here could use a little adventure in his lifetime! 'Cause, you see…chicks dig men of action, right? Riiight.

YUXETTE: Yux. (This guy's a loon.)

PARAKETE: Huh? What did that green blobby thing say?

YUXETTE: Yux?! (Blobby thing?!)

X-NAUT: Uh…Yuxette said "yux."

PARAKETE: Well that was like, totally obvious, dude.

YUXETTE: *hops up and down* Yux! (X-Naut!)

X-NAUT: *turns to Yuxette* Shhh! Let's hear this guy out!

PARAKETE: …So, since you dudes are interested in Crystal Stars and you're heading towards Hooktail Castle… I thought you guys must be adventurers! Am I right, or am I right?

X-NAUT: *turns to Parakete* Umm… I guess so.

PARAKETE: Right on, man! So, can I come along or what, dudes?

X-NAUT: Uh, sure! What's the harm? *turns to Yuxette* It's OK with you it he comes along, isn't it, Yuxette?

YUXETTE: …Yux. (…Whatever.)

X-NAUT: *turns back to Parakete* Yuxette said "yes."

PARAKETE: All right, man! You won't regret it, seriously! You've got yourself a partner!

YUXETTE: …Yux. (…Peh.)

Parakete joined X-Naut's party! Parakete's abilities: A Primer. Parakete can pick up X-Naut and carry him in the air temporarily. He can transport X-Naut across short gaps that he normally can't jump over. In battle, Parakete can strike a single foe with his basic attack, the Shell Toss! He can also strike multiple foes, even airborne ones, with his Shell Shot attack! Author's Note (2005): "Normally, only one partner can be out at a time, but just for the sake of the story, I'll make it as if they're all present."

PARAKETE: All right, what's your name, dude? X-Naut? Hmm… How 'bout I just call you X-dude from now on? Sounds catchy to me. Anyways, to get across that bridge, I have to carry you, of course. Just get as close to that break as you can, and let me rip!

X-Naut, Yuxette and Parakete go back to the bridge and Parakete flies X-Naut across. Yuxette just floats across the break. Then they open the big oak doors and enter a hallway covered in red-tiled flooring and walls with dozens of windows, which wouldn't be too intimidating if not for the skeletal remains of Koopa Troopas strewn all over the floor. There are also some Koopa Paratroopa enemies flying around the room, attacking X-Naut whenever he gets close.

After defeating the enemies, X-Naut and his partners enter the next room, which has cages built into the walls. X-Naut, Yuxette and Parakete move past the Koopa skeletons on the ground and head for the next door. They find a pile of red-colored Koopa bones sitting in front of the door, blocking their way. X-Naut checks the bones and they suddenly start rattling.

X-NAUT: !

RED BONES: Blaarf harf harf HARF! You clearly don't value your lives much if you've come to this castle to disturb us. You will go no further, and from this moment on…you'll be nothing but bones!

The Red Bones springs to life, simultaneously bringing an army of living Koopa skeletons crashing down from the ceiling. The mob surrounds the group and starts pushing it back.

PARAKETE: X-dude! What's up with these maniacs? OUCH! Hey! Watch the wings, pal! X-dude! These guys are all over me, man! Do something!

X-NAUT: Mrrrmmmfff… Yuxette! Fire!

YUXETTE: Yux! (Rodger!)

Yuxette fires laser rings at the mob. As the rings hit their targets, the skeletons go flying. X-Naut and Parakete take cover behind Yuxette as she pummels the army with charged-up, explosive attacks. Eventually, they forge an opening in the crowd and reach the Red Bones, who is still guarding the door.

BATTLE MODE ENTERED!

X-Naut and Yuxette face off against the Red Bones and four of the Koopa skeletons, called Dull Bones. Author's Note (2005): "Even though I'm including all of the partners on the field, I'm sticking with the rules during battle, so only one partner fights at a time."

[Can't flee this fight!]

X-Naut changes his partner to Parakete.

Parakete used Shell Shot! -3 FP. Parakete withdraws into his shell, charges up while aiming, and charges through all five enemies! NICE! All of them lose 1 HP, which is enough to defeat all four Dull Bones!

Red Bones tosses a bone at X-Naut! Ouch! -3 HP!

X-Naut slams into Red Bones! NICE! Red Bones took 1 damage!

Parakete used Shell Toss! Parakete flies over to Red Bones and swoops into it with his shell! NICE! Red Bones lost its last HP!

BATTLE MODE END!

With the Red Bones gone, the army of Dull Bones scatters. X-Naut opens the door and the team continues on their way.


Part 4: The Curse

X-Naut walks through the next tall room. After battling some more Dull Bones, he hops up some stairs to a locked door. A key lies on the wall, but X-Naut is unable to reach it. He sees a yellow block resting on top of a gray block with an up-arrow imprinted on it. X-Naut uses Yuxette's charged laser ring to destroy the block, and then he hits a nearby switch that causes the arrow block to rise upward without the weight. Now Yuxette has room to fire another laser ring at a switch some distance away along the wall. The switch triggers, making the stairs flip around to face the opposite direction. X-Naut climbs them and hops onto a ledge. The key is on another ledge a few feet away. Since Yuxette's laser rings can't pick up items, X-Naut has Parakete fly him over to the ledge. After X-Naut obtains the Castle Key, Yuxette fires another laser ring at the switch, rotating the stairs back to their original position. X-Naut drops down from the ledge, climbs the stairs again, and opens the locked door.

X-Naut and his gang enter a tower, but they don't climb up just yet. Instead, they open the door on the opposite side and find themselves in a dungeon room filled with cells, chained balls, and even more Dull Bones. There's a fenced-off switch that opens one of the three cell doors temporarily. X-Naut has Yuxette charge up a laser ring at the switch while he and Parakete run and fly—X-Naut runs, Parakete flies—to the cell door. When Yuxette shoots the switch, the bars retreat and the gang quickly goes inside before the door slams down again.

X-Naut finds a hole in the cell that leads to another room in the torture chamber. This room has some axes on the wall, a couple of old barrels, a rickety wooden chair, another chained ball, and an open black chest. Near the center of the room is a raggedy, yet muscular Toad. He spots the group and speaks with an odd voice.

TOAD: What the heck? Who are you guys? I can't remember the last time someone found me here! No one's ever dared to go this far inside the castle before.

X-NAUT: *walks up to the Toad* …Uh, who are you? And what are you doing here?

PARAKETE: And dude, your voice sounds a little funny.

TOAD: *gets angry* Hey! People can't help how they sound! So butt out! *stops being angry* …Oops, sorry. I shouldn't blow up on new acquaintances. See, I'm a prisoner here. I've been locked inside this room for a LONG time! Yeah… In fact, it's been so long, I don't even remember what I was doing before I got imprisoned… Hey, listen! Could you tell me what year it is?

X-NAUT: Um, it's the year ○○. (Author's Note (2005): "Dates in the story are always recorded as shapes for some reason, so there.")

TOAD: Good gravy! That's the year when…

YUXETTE: Yux? (When what?)

TOAD: Uh, nothing! Never mind!

PARAKETE: Dude, this dude is pretty suspicious… Guess all these years in captivity wasted his brain.

X-NAUT: Wait… Did he just understand Yuxette?

YUXETTE: Yux! (Yeah, he replied to me!)

TOAD: Uh… What's a Yux-a-thingy? What are we talking about again? I don't understand…

PARAKETE: See? Wasted to nothing, man.

TOAD: *gets angry again* Grrrrrr!

YUXETTE: Yux? (What did we come in here for?)

TOAD: *stops being angry* Good question. You're basically trapped in this room with me now. No way to get those cell doors back open…

PARAKETE: What?! This blows, man! I ain't spending the rest of my hip life in this crumb pit!

X-NAUT: OK, so what can we do now?

TOAD: How about doing me a favor? Could you maybe find this little trinket I lost? It's this medallion of mine. I'll get along in this prison a lot better if I get it back.

YUXETTE: Yux… (He might get along a lot better with Parakete too…)

TOAD: So, could you please find my medallion? I'll make it worth your while if you do! You know, a little I-scratch-your-back-you-scratch-mine! Except in reverse order. Of course, you don't have to if you don't want to. Like finding a medal is hard…

PARAKETE: So, what oughta we do, X-dude? Think we can trust our luck with this hobo?

TOAD: *angry* GRRRRRR!

X-NAUT: *hastily* Yep, let's do it!

X-Naut opens the door on the far side of the room. Inside is a large, spacious, and enclosed room with a small chest in the center. Some metal plates with holes in them cover the ground in a mazelike pattern. X-Naut, Yuxette and Parakete go across the oddly-tiled floor to the chest, open it, and find something called the Medallion of Strength. Suddenly, spikes shoot up from the holes, leaving only the narrow, non-metal path to walk on. The group looks around at the spikes.

YUXETTE: ! Yux! Yux! (Look! Up there!)

Yuxette and X-Naut look up at the ceiling. Parakete takes a hint from them and looks up too. The ceiling is covered with spikes and is slowly descending upon the ground.

PARAKETE: Whoa! Dude, that is NOT cool! Let's get outta here before we get pinned to the ground…literally!

X-Naut and Parakete have 50 seconds to navigate the maze and find their way back to the entrance. They finally reach the door and exit just before the ceiling hits the ground.

PARAKETE: Dude, that was way gnarly! This is EXACTLY what I signed up for! Woohoo! Now, let's give that trinket back to that prisoner dude with the weird voice.

TOAD: You know, I'm right here, and I can hear every word you say.

PARAKETE: Oh, sorry dude.

X-NAUT: *shows the medallion to the Toad*

TOAD: What's that? You actually found my item? Wow! Thanks, guys!

X-NAUT: *hands over Medallion of Strength*

TOAD: YESSS! You're my hero! I'm in your debt! …Or not! WHEEE HEE HEE HEE HEE! FOOOOOOOLS!

Suddenly, the Toad transforms into purple wallpaper that covers everything except X-Naut. A large, spooky face appears in the background.

SPIRIT: How do you like being tricked in such a humiliating fashion? You don't, right? You didn't really think I was going to HELP you, did you?! I was just looking for the perfect dummy to CURSE! And you fit the bill! Oogly-googly-BOO!

Lights flash and X-Naut gets cursed.

SPIRIT: Wheee hee hee hee hee! How do you like them apples? Now you're cursed! Oh, how I delight in making people miserable! It thrills me to no end! Now, whenever you turn sideways, you'll be like a piece of paper! You'll spend the rest of your life under this horrible curse! Don't you feel lucky? I think I'll tell you all the details about this curse so you can see what you're plagued with! Demonstrate! Turn sideways and tremble at your new appearance!

X-NAUT: *turns sideways and becomes a thin piece of paper* *turns back around and turns back into his normal body*

SPIRIT: Wheeee hee hee hee hee! Just look at yourself! How embarrassing for you! Eat a sandwich, skinny! Hee! …Do you understand what this curse means for you?

X-NAUT: Uh, I guess so.

SPIRIT: Then I'll leave you to your fate! Wheee hee hee hee hee!

The spirit's face disappears and the purple wallpaper crumples up and shrinks to nothing. X-Naut is back in the dungeon room with Yuxette and Parakete.

PARAKETE: …Dude, what was up with THAT guy?

YUXETTE: Yux… (This adventure just keeps on getting weirder and weirder…)


Part 5: Hooktail

X-Naut and his group go back through the hole and into the cell. They use the power of their new "curse", turning sideways into paper and slipping in between the bars of the cell. Then they exit the dungeon and travel back the way they came.

X-Naut goes back to the room where he fought the Red Bones. He finds a cage in the wall that has vertical bars without horizontal bars intertwining and slips through. He finds a Castle Key inside the cell and takes it back to the tower.

X-Naut climbs onto a green elevator block and has Yuxette fire a laser ring at a nearby switch. The elevator activates, carrying X-Naut's gang up a few floors and stopping at some more stairs. The gang climbs up to another door, unlocks it with the key, and continues.

The next path is divided by large gaps. X-Naut activates a switch by jumping on it. The switch tears up some wallpaper in the gap, revealing the covered-up walkway. X-Naut shuffles across to the next gap. He sees a switch on the other side, so he has Yuxette do her thing. The switch bridges the second gap, which leaves only one more gap to get across. X-Naut doesn't see any switch, so he figures, hey, why not use Parakete to get across? The last gap is shorter than the first two anyway. So Parakete flies X-Naut across, and they open the next door.

They find themselves inside another tower with another elevator block. X-Naut fights off some Dull Bones and has Yuxette charge up at the switch, then scrambles to the block and has Yuxette release. The block ascends to a stone walkway that stretches either way, with a door on either side. One door is locked, so X-Naut takes the other.

The room X-Naut enters appears to be a storage room. There are boxes of iron balls and shelves full of spears and axes. Some barrels and chests lay on the floor. Some chests are open already. X-Naut opens the closed chests and finds a Mushroom, some Honey Syrup, and another Castle Key. As X-Naut is about to leave the room, Parakete speaks up.

PARAKETE: Y'know, X-dude, I was thinking…

X-NAUT: *turns to Parakete* Yeah?

PARAKETE: …The reason we're going through this castle and all…is to get the Crystal Star, right?

X-NAUT: …Yeah…or, at least…stop this mustache guy from getting it first….

PARAKETE: Gotcha. This mustachioed dude…I think I mighta heard about him…

X-NAUT: Really?

PARAKETE: Yeah… You know that cute chick I followed back in Petalburg? Dang, she was hot…but yeah, I followed her…and talked to her…and it turns out she has this boyfriend, which is like, a total bummer, but anyways, this boyfriend… The girl said the dude was going to this castle with some mustache man… You think that's the same guy?

X-NAUT: The mustache man?

YUXETTE: Yux! (I don't see how it could be someone else!)

X-NAUT: Yeah…it must be… So what was the point of telling us that?

PARAKETE: No point, really…just something I was thinking about.

X-NAUT: What? You don't even happen to know the guy's name?

PARAKETE: Uh, no. Oh, but we do know that this mustache dude has friends! That's something new!

X-NAUT: Yeah, well… *turns to Yuxette* We have friends, too! Right, Yuxette?

YUXETTE: Yux! (Yeah!)

The trio runs out of the storage room, across the stone walkway, takes out a Paragoomba, unlocks the other door, and charges through the next room, taking out any enemies that get in their way. They find the next door on a ledge that is out of their reach. X-Naut uses Yuxette's Charge ability to hit a yellow switch while X-Naut and Parakete run onto a yellow elevator block. When the block stops, Parakete takes wing and flies X-Naut all the way over to the ledge with the door.

Now they're back in the first tower, only much higher. Downstairs a ways, there's another elevator block, but this time it's blocking the path. X-Naut jumps into a suspended switch, making the elevator drop down, leaving a gap. On the other side of the gap is yet another Castle Key, easy pickings for Parakete. With that, X-Naut climbs to the top of the tower and unlocks the door.

The crew is outside now, walking across a long, stone bridge that leads from the first tower to the second. The sky is beginning to turn dark. Koopa Troopas and Paratroopas patrol the bridge, but they aren't any match for X-Naut and his friends. They enter the second tower and climb up a winding staircase, going higher…and higher…and higher… The sky gets darker with each step they take. They all get ominous feelings in the pits of their stomachs. They seem to know what lies at the top of the tower, what they are heading for… What they don't know is if they'll be able to come out with the Crystal Star, or even alive… Nonetheless, they continue onward determinedly, as if by some unspoken agreement. They don't know exactly what they'll find, but they'll have to face it. It's too late to turn back now, they all think. Whatever is in store for us at the top of this tower, we'll have to face it together, and face it we shall.

Author's Note (2005): "…I wonder why I'm being so dramatic here. It's not like what the characters think is that important to the story. Just building up suspense, I guess. Anyways…it's time to wrap things up."

X-Naut, Yuxette, and Parakete battle one last Spiky Goomba at the top of the staircase before stepping outside and hopping up the last few stairs. They are now outside the castle's keep, in front of two gigantic wooden doors. They push them open and enter the humongous chamber within.

X-NAUT, YUXETTE & PARAKETE: !

There, in the middle of the room, lies a red dragon with three purple, hook-shaped tails, powerful claws, two small wings, a bloated snout, and three hairpieces protruding from its head. What's incredible about it is that it seems to be composed entirely out of paper. Even more incredible, however, is that the dragon is lying flat on its back, seemingly dead.

PARAKETE: WHOA! Is that…Hooktail? I thought it might be a little more…you know, lively.

X-NAUT: Somebody must have already beaten it! And it was probably that mustached guy…

PARAKETE: Well, that's a relief, I guess. So, what do we do now, X-dude?

X-NAUT: We should at least try to search for the Crystal Star that the dragon was guarding.

X-Naut, Yuxette and Parakete look all around the room for the Crystal Star. They search every nook and cranny—even around and on top of Hooktail's body—and don't find a thing. They meet up again in front of the dead dragon.

X-NAUT: So…did you find it anywhere?

PARAKETE: Nope. Nothing here, dude. Sorry.

YUXETTE: Yux… (I got nothing as well…)

X-NAUT: Darn… I guess we're too late.

VOICE: Grrrrrrrroooooooooorrrrrrgh…

X-NAUT, YUXETTE: & PARAKETE: !

Hooktail stirs, opens her eyes, and turns over onto her belly. X-Naut, Yuxette, and Parakete scramble out of the way of her descending feet and stand with their backs against the walls, staring at the very-much-alive dragon in stark terror. Hooktail is now standing upright, but looks slightly disoriented.

HOOKTAIL: Uuuurrgh… It feels like I just coughed something up… *looks around* Huh? Hey! Where did that tubby red-and-blue clothed guy with the mustache go? Did he just take what I think he took? *spots the group* And just who are you three? *looks droopy* Uuuughhh… That man and that Koopa of his did a number on me… But all I need is a hearty meal and I'll be back to normal! *stomps around to face the gang* And you three look like you'll make a good energizing snack!

BATTLE MODE ENTERED!

And thus, the boss battle with Hooktail begins. X-Naut and Parakete stand at one side of the wooden stage while Hooktail takes up the entire other side and most of the backstage.

HOOKTAIL: Ohh ho ho ho ho ho ho! Snack time, little appetizers! Once I devour you, I'll have enough energy to continue feasting upon the villages of this world!

PARAKETE: Whoa! This doesn't look good, X-dude. I really don't want to end up as an unstylish pile of bones.

X-NAUT: Umm… Don't worry! We can take this dragon! If that mustache guy and his friends could topple this beast, then so can we!

[Can't flee this fight!]

X-NAUT: *uses Tattle Log* That's Hooktail! Max HP is 15, attack is 4, and defense is 0. It attacks by stomping, biting, and it even has fire breath… Not good. Hm… It says here that Hooktail is a deceitful dragon who will try to trick its way out of an untimely demise. And apparently it can't stand things that begin with 'cr' and end with 'icket'. A…cricket? Wish there was a way we could use something like that…right about now…

Parakete used Shell Toss! NICE! Hooktail took 2 damage!

Hooktail used Fire Breath on X-Naut and Parakete! Yeeeowch! They both took 3 damage!

X-Naut used Jump Slam! NICE! Hooktail lost 2 HP!

Parakete tosses his shell again! NICE one! -2 more HP for Hooktail!

Hooktail used Stomp on X-Naut! NICE Guard! X-Naut still took 3 damage!

X-Naut tackles Hooktail's foot! NICE hit! Hooktail -2 HP! Just 7 left!

Parakete used Shell Toss again! NICE! Hooktail lost 2 more HP!

Hooktail stomps on Parakete! He guards NICEly! Parakete -3 HP!

X-Naut switches places with Parakete. Parakete shell tosses into Hooktail again, dealing a NICE blow! Hooktail -2 HP!

X-Naut used Power Slam! -2 FP. NICE! That took away Hooktail's remaining 3 HP!

HOOKTAIL: W-wait! Hold up a moment! I give up! Please! I won't be bad anymore. In fact, I'm sorry! For everything I've done! Er… Yeah… To show for it, I'll give you 1,000 coins! So, what do you say? Will you forgive me?

PARAKETE: 1000 coins? Sounds pretty snazzy, eh, X-dude?

X-NAUT: …No thanks. I don't need those coins.

HOOKTAIL: What? Are you serious? Hmmm… Then…how about a lovely, rare, extra-special badge instead, huh? I'll give it to you if you only forgive me!

PARAKETE: You know, I don't think we can trust this dragon…

X-NAUT: You're right.

HOOKTAIL: Hmmmph! Don't trust me, do you? What if I let you smell…

X-NAUT: No!

HOOKTAIL: You didn't even let me… You know what? Forget this trickery nonsense! I'm going straight for the meat of the situation!

Hooktail creeps back behind stage and suddenly lashes out at the audience watching the battle. She gobbles up a large number of members, and the rest flee the theatre. Hooktail replenishes 10 HP, her attack goes up to 5, and her defense rises to 1!

PARAKETE: Man! That is sick and wrong, dude!

HOOKTAIL: Ohh ho ho ho ho ho ho! Now my strength has returned to me! I'm re-energized at last!

PARAKETE: C'mon, X-dude! Let's finish off this creep, and fast!

X-Naut and Parakete jump off the stage to confront Hooktail.

Parakete switched places with X-Naut. X-Naut Power Slams Hooktail! At the cost of 2 more FP, X-Naut delivers a NICE blow that takes away 3 HP!

Parakete used Shell Toss! NICE one! 2 more HP down for Hooktail! Just 5 left!

Hooktail used Fire Breath! NICE Guards, but X-Naut and Parakete still take 4 damage! Danger! Parakete is down to his last 5 HP!

X-Naut used First Aid! X-Naut collects the falling hearts and flowers while avoiding the Poison Mushrooms. X-Naut +6 HP! Parakete +4 HP! X-Naut +5 FP!

Parakete used Shell Shot! NICE! It takes away 3 FP and does only 1 damage due to Hooktail's defense, but it still looks cool!

Hooktail used Stomp on X-Naut! GREAT Superguard! Hooktail lost 1 HP!

X-Naut used Power Slam! That's one heck of a NICE shot! Hooktail loses 3 HP, and she is down!

HOOKTAIL: Noooooooo… How could I have been beaten…TWICE?! It just can't be… This…could…be…the…end…for…me… Goodbye, all my meals…farewell, all you…tasty…morsels… *collapses*

BATTLE MODE END!

Hooktail falls over on her back again, and hopefully this time, she will stay down.

PARAKETE: Wowzers… That was one mean dragon… But we won anyways, X-dude! Hooray for us!

YUXETTE: Yux! Yux! (Yay! We rocked!)

X-NAUT: But we were too late to get the Crystal Star…

PARAKETE: Oh yeah, there's that…but at least we're alive!

YUXETTE: Yux! (We're not just alive, we're kicking!)

X-NAUT: But—

Suddenly, lights start glowing around X-Naut.

YUXETTE: Yux! Yux! (Oh! This again!)

PARAKETE: Hey, X-dude? You're…glowing, man. You feeling all right?

The lights disappear, and a circle of sparkles flies up X-Naut's body. Another piece of X-Naut's memory is revived, and X-Naut remembered the special move Seismic Wave!

END OF CHAPTER

After making his way through the dreaded Hooktail Castle, X-Naut got the chance to trounce Hooktail. But even though he was victorious, he had failed to obtain the Crystal Star. But still, his mission has not been in vain. He has learned invaluable information for his master, Grodus. But just who is this mustachioed man who is after the Crystal Stars? And does he really possess the Magical Map? Yes… X-Naut's adventure has only just begun.


Interlude

Colors… There are many colors flying around… And the sensation… It feels as if I'm adrift in my own mind… I have a headache… I can't feel the rest of my body… Is this dream? Where am I? …Something's near… I can feel it… Oh! I…

A sepia-toned image of a towering dragon appears through the veil of colors. It is frozen in motion like a still-life painting, with a foot raised to stomp something below her…

…This is…Hooktail…

VOICE: Yux! Yux? (X-Naut! Are you OK?)

…That voice!

The image vanishes along with the flowing colors. Now the view is of the ceiling of Hooktail's room. Yuxette and Parakete are looking down on the viewer.

PARAKETE: Dude, I think he just blinked!

YUXETTE: Yux! Yux! (He's alive! Yay!)

X-Naut picks himself up from the floor of the chamber and looks around. Hooktail's body is still there, but she's stopped twitching now.

X-NAUT: Uh…what happened?

PARAKETE: Well, you're gonna think this is crazy, but… There were all these crazy lights, and then you just stood there, man, and then, it was like, WHOOSH! A gust of wind knocked you down like you were a statue, dude.

YUXETTE: Yux! (You fainted, X-Naut!)

X-NAUT: I did? Huh… I don't recall…

PARAKETE: Like a statue, man… A statue.

X-NAUT: How long was I down?

YUXETTE: Yux. (Only a few seconds.)

X-NAUT: Oh… Then there's still time! We have to inform Sir Grodus about this immediately!

PARAKETE: Who?

X-NAUT: My boss. *pulls out Mailbox DS* He's not going to be happy to hear this… But I have a mission, so it needs to be done. *flips DS open*

YUXETTE: Yux… (Glad to see you're feeling better, X-Naut…)

PARAKETE: Hey, whatcha got there? Is that some sort of Mailbox SP or something?

X-NAUT: Actually, it's a Mailbox DS. I guess it's pretty advanced.

X-Naut pulls out a stylus pen and starts tapping on the bottom screen. Soon, words appear on the top screen.

SCREEN: Now connecting to Grodus's room. Please wait…

Meanwhile, at the X-Naut Fortress in the second sublevel, two X-Nauts are standing beside the door that the mob of X-Nauts ran through the other day. The door suddenly opens.

X-NAUTS: ! *step aside*

Lord Crump, the big X-Naut with the purple headgear, red cape, and black uniform with a white X, comes marching through the doors.

LORD CRUMP: Buh! Buh! Buh huh huh! Guess who's back, everyone! It's your favorite Lord Crump, with a special delivery for Sir Grodus! *looks around* …Which will arrive momentarily, due to some, uh, cooperation problems. Anyway, I'd better get back to Grodus and tell him what a good job I did! Buh! Buh! Buh huh huh!

Author's Note (2005): "Yes, it's Lord Crump, but that's not all. If this were, in fact, a game, you would be controlling Lord Crump right now! Isn't that awesome? …Well then, back to adventure!"

Lord Crump just walks around the 2nd sublevel and sees a couple of X-Nauts talking together. He decides to listen in.

1ST X-NAUT: So the other day, Lord Crump gave me the job of doing the laundry!

2ND X-NAUT: So what? All of us have to do the laundry sometime…

1ST X-NAUT: Not just regular laundry! HIS laundry!

2ND X-NAUT: Ohhh… Now I see where you're coming from…

1ST X-NAUT: It was the nastiest thing I ever did, dude! Have you SMELLED Lord Crump's undies?! They could knock out an elephant!

2ND X-NAUT: *sees Lord Crump* Uh…dude, you might want to…

1ST X-NAUT: Oh, but it was far worse TOUCHING those things! There was this one pair of boxers that had this WEIRD spot on—

CRUMP: A-HEM!

1ST X-NAUT: *turns around and jumps* Aaaaaaah! L-Lord Crump!

CRUMP: I hope you're not complaining about the work I give you! Especially those good privileges like doing my laundry! Most X-Nauts would kill for a job like that!

1ST X-NAUT: Um, yes sir—I mean, no sir, I wasn't complaining!

CRUMP: Good! And for your information, my hygiene happens to be top-notch compared to you slugs! You could only dream of having the luxurious clothing I wear! Isn't that right, soldier?

1ST X-NAUT: Yes, of course, sir!

Lord Crump continues down the hallway and meets another X-Naut.

X-NAUT: Lord Crump! LordCrumpLordCrumpLordCrumpLordCrumpLordCrumpLordCrump—

CRUMP: What is it?

X-NAUT: Remember me? It's me, Johnson!

CRUMP: Huh? …Oh yeah, you. What do you want from me?

JOHNSON: I was wondering if I could get your autograph!

CRUMP: An autograph?! …Buh! Buh! Buh huh huh! You're kidding, right? You can't expect the great Lord Crump to spend his time handing out free autographs! You gotta earn those babies!

JOHNSON: Oh, of course! How ignorant of me! How may I be of service, my lord?

CRUMP: Why don't you clean out the toilet on the fourth sublevel?

JOHNSON: At once, sir! *salutes and runs off*

CRUMP: *watches him go* Buh huh huh! Sucker!

Lord Crump finally reaches Sir Grodus's room.

CRUMP: Sir Grodus, I have returned!

SIR GRODUS: *turning to look at him* I see. So your capture of the princess was successful, correct?

CRUMP: Yes, sir. Princess Peach will be arriving very shortly, sir.

GRODUS: Good. It is nice to know something went according to plan for once.

CRUMP: Yes, sir, Grodus! *walks to center of room* …But there was that sassy little Goomba and that mustachioed chump…

GRODUS: Pardon? Did you say something, Lord Crump?

CRUMP: Whuh? Oh, nothing, Grodus! Absolutely nothing… Buh huh huh.

GRODUS: Hmm. *turns away*

Then two X-Nauts enter the room with a blond-haired woman standing between them. She wears a pink dress, long white gloves, blue pearly earrings, and a jeweled crown. The X-Nauts salute in their cross-armed position.

X-NAUT 1: O great, exalted Grodus! We have brought the Princess Peach you ordered, sir!

GRODUS: Well, well, well, my pet… Isn't it about time you told us where the map is?

The woman identified as Princess Peach says nothing.

GRODUS: *turns to her* Princess Peach. You will speak when spoken to.

PRINCESS PEACH: I'm telling you, I don't know.

GRODUS: There's no point in trying to hide it, silly girl. We know you had it. We KNOW this. Trust me, it's very much in your best interest to be completely honest with us. We X-Nauts are not all rainbows and lollipops, I assure you. We're quite nasty.

PEACH: …

A holographic screen suddenly appears in the room. X-Naut's visual chat message has finally connected.

X-NAUT: *salutes* Grodus, sir! I have news.

GRODUS: Report at once.

X-NAUT: You know that Crystal Star we thought maybe Hooktail had? Well, someone nabbed it.

GRODUS: What? WHAT did you say? Someone else is after the Crystal Stars? And he defeated that Hooktail creature, you say? SPEAK, soldier!

X-NAUT: Yes, sir. Sorry, sir. There's more, too. See, according to the report, it was a mustached dude in a red hat and blue overalls who pulled the job.

PEACH: Mario!

GRODUS: *steps forward* Excuse me? Mario?

PEACH: *puts a hand to her mouth* Oh no!

GRODUS: Gaack ack ack ack ack! I see… So, you know of this Mario, do you? Hmmm… This fool matters not at all. I'll know all about him before long, that I promise. I grow bored of talking. Take Princess Peach back to the holding room.

X-NAUT 1: Yessir!

The two X-Nauts walk back to Princess Peach.

GRODUS: And men! Take good care of Princess Peach. Understand? She is not to be harmed.

X-NAUT 1: You got it, sir!

The X-Nauts salute, turn around and lead Princess Peach out of the room. The main character X-Naut closes his communication. That leaves just Grodus and Lord Crump in the room.

GRODUS: Well, Lord Crump… If this Mario character has the map, then it's highly likely he'll find the Crystal Star we're hunting in the Boggly Woods. You must return there immediately and hasten the excavation. It must not fail.

CRUMP: Whuzzat?! Oh, yeah, sure! Roger, Grodus! And with that… Pow! I'm gone! *marches out of room, then thinks out loud to self* Uh, what was that guy? Mario? He sounds just like the guy I met in Rogueport. Well, no matter! I've got something important to do, and if that Mario shows his face…then I'll give him another taste of the old CRUMP-A-BOMB! Buh! Buh! Buh huh huh huh!

Lord Crump walks down the hallway to the same room from which he entered. He enters again, and the doors close behind him. There's a whirring sound inside the room, and that concludes Lord Crump's brief moment of gaming glory.


Author's Note (2005): I've decided to go ahead and make another interlude, mainly because this is my story and I want to put in as much effort into it as I possibly can. So read on!

Interlude 2

Now we look at a dirty town filled with mismatching brick buildings and wooden fences, barrels and boxes. Many of the buildings have graffiti paint on them along with old, torn posters. A rickety billboard stands in front of a shop, and a gallows is displayed in the center of the area. Many people—mostly Goombas, Bandits, Squeeks and Doogans—drift around the town, some lazily, others shiftily. Standing in an alley between two buildings is X-Naut White with his Mailbox DS open.

WHITE: Grodus, sir! I am currently stationed at Rogueport.

GRODUS: Good. If I have anything that concerns X-Naut, I will contact you to deal with it. But in the meantime, you are to conduct more research on the Thousand-Year Door. Beldam has told me that its seal may be weakening after a thousand years.

WHITE: Yes, sir. I'll uncover what I can. *closes link and looks around* Now then, I may need some help in trying to decipher the secrets of the Thousand-Year Door. But who in Rogueport would be able perform such a task?

Author's Note (2005): "Now, X-Naut White is the character of attention for a while. Just clueing you in." White walks around central Rogueport, getting information from all the shady people. One tells him to ask Podley, the innkeeper, any questions regarding the townsfolk. So White drops into the inn and finds an old-timer polishing glasses behind the counter.

PODLEY: Welcome to you and yours! Have a seat! This is Podley's Place, a humble little cola shop where folks mix stories and drinks. By the way, I haven't seen your face around here before. Have you just made port?

WHITE: Yes. My ship has just dropped anchor here. I've arrived on important business.

PODLEY: Oh, really? And what, may I ask, business is that?

WHITE: … I've come to commence research involving the legendary Thousand-Year Door.

PODLEY: You have!? …Well, then, you've come to the right place. The door is supposedly deep beneath this very town. But, you know, the door is just a legend, so no one really knows if it truly exists.

WHITE: Part of the reason I've come here is to find out that very thing. …Only, I haven't the slightest clue where to begin looking. I thought perhaps there would be someone here in Rogueport who would know something…

PODLEY: There is. He's an elderly Goomba by the name of Professor Frankly. I hear he used to teach archaeology at the Universtiy of Goom. If there's anyone who knows about the door, it's him.

WHITE: Is that so? Then perhaps I should negotiate with him.

PODLEY: Yes, I would suggest you do that. Well, here's hoping your research goes well.

WHITE: Thank you. *leaves inn*

X-Naut White then heads over to the east side of Rogueport. This area is divided in part by a large brick wall with a Craw guarding the only opening. Many more fences, barrels and boxes lie throughout the streets. The lower part of the sector is submerged in filthy water. White doesn't pay much heed to the environment and goes into one of the wooden houses. Inside is practically a library, with shelf after shelf filled with books. An elderly Goomba with gray, puffy hair and swirling glasses is sitting at a desk, reading an open book.

WHITE: Excuse me, might you be…Professor Frankly?

FRANKLY: *turns to X-Naut White* Whuzzuh? Who's there? Who wants me?

X-Naut White walks over to the Goomba's desk. The Goomba takes a step forward.

FRANKLY: Ah. Yes. You. Now, you, uh… No, wait! Who are you?

WHITE: My name is… *looks at the book Frankly was reading* ...Treasure map?

FRANKLY: Excuse me? Oh! *closes the book* Nothing important in there.

WHITE: No, wait! That was my name! Er… Trevor…Napkins.

FRANKLY: Trevor Napkins? Ermmm… Of course. So, what sort of errand brings someone like you to a place like this?

WHITE: I came here to conduct important research involving the legendary treasure. I thought that an archaeologist such as yourself would know about it, Professor…

FRANKLY: Of course I know about it. The reason I came here was to study that very subject. But why do you want to research that legendary treasure?

WHITE: I realize it is merely legend… But I am a historian, and it is my job to search for and reveal the truth.

FRANKLY: That's a good point! So, you're a historian, are you, Mr. Napkins? Very well, then I'll cooperate with you however I can. First of all, about the treasure… There are many mysteries surrounding it. Some say it's an infinitely vast treasure hoard, while others say it's a magical item. Some books say it's actually a monster, while still others claim it's an empty chest… So many different theories… Obviously, it's impossible to divine the truth among them. …But all agree on one point: to find the treasure, one must have the Crystal Stars!

WHITE: *jumps* Crystal Stars?!

FRANKLY: Yes, of course. Don't you know the legend? "To find the treasure of yore, take the seven Crystal Stars to the Thousand-Year Door!"

WHITE: Yes, yes, of course I know of it. In any case, I believe I should get to the site of this Thousand-Year Door. The sooner, the better.

FRANKLY: Well, all right then! Fortunately, I know the very path to the door. Just let me show the way. *walks to the door with White* Say, I'm curious… Trevor? Do you know anything about a suspicious gang?

WHITE: What kind of gang?

FRANKLY: They were here in Rogueport quite a while ago. I believe they were after the Crystal Stars.

WHITE: ! …No, professor, I'm afraid I don't.

FRANKLY: Hmph! Well, then, we should get going.

They go outside and Professor Frankly walks over to a fence post and removes it. Beyond the fence is a pipe that the professor and White take down to the sewers. Before long, they reappear in an infinitely large room that has a set of stairs on either side. Several massive stone columns fill up the room, some of them chipped or fallen in places. Near the front of the room is a large, circular platform with a pedestal in the center. Most important of all, however, is the enormous brown door in front of the pedestal, decorated with the designs of seven stars.

FRANKLY: There! See that, Mr. Napkins? The Thousand-Year Door!

The door, now known as the one and only Thousand-Year Door, looms powerfully before them. Professor Frankly and X-Naut White walk up to it.

FRANKLY: Well, if there's nothing else you need, I suppose I'll head back to my place. *leaves the room*

WHITE: *looking at Frankly* You poor, naïve thing. I already know the path to the Thousand-Year door. You really don't have any idea what's really behind that door, do you? But at least I have someone I can trust with my research. *turns to the door* Time for me to begin! *hears something and turns around* ! *runs and hides behind a pillar*

A mustached man with a big nose, red cap, and blue overalls enters the room with a Koopa who wears a blue shirt, white boots, and a band-aid on his noggin. The man hops onto the pedestal.

KOOPA: Um… All right, Mario! Hold up that Crystal Star!

The man holds up a diamond-colored Crystal Star in his white gloves. Mysterious blue lights encircle the platform and a brown piece of paper, also in the possession of the mustachio, starts glowing. X-Naut White watches from behind the pillar. The paper shines brilliantly and then floats back to the man. Both he and the Koopa read it.

KOOPA: Hey, uh, Mario, look there. The next Crystal Star showed up on the map. But… I'm sorry, but I don't have a clue where that is.

The man, now known as Mario, raises his hand and says "oh" to the Koopa.

KOOPA: Um… I think maybe we should take it to Professor Frankly and let him look at it.

Mario and the Koopa leave the room. X-Naut White walks out from hiding and watches them leave.

WHITE: …