Disclaimer: Still don't own anything.
Numb was better than a broken heart.
Her head was swimming, her mind long gone into the abyss. All that liquor had finally hit her and she stumbled around her loft, finding residence on the couch and pulling up his contact.
Come overrrr.
She squinted her eyes and hit the send button before breaking out into a fit of giggles. It was 3 AM, she was on call in three hours.
This was not what she should be doing.
But she finally went crazy. Kate Beckett finally lost her mind, she couldn't keep playing this game anymore. She needed him, and she knew even in her intoxicated state that she had to tell him how she felt.
Ten minutes later she heard a knock at her door, and she stumbled over to open it.
"Beckett. Beckett is everything okay?" He rushed in past her and she shut the door, leaning against it.
"I got your text I-are you alright?" He walked over to her and watched how a smile broke onto her face, followed by another fit of giggles.
"Why are you laughing? This isn't funny." His tone was cold and flat, making her pout.
"First of all Ricky, my name's Kate." She sauntered over to him and grabbed the collar of his t-shirt. He rested his hands over hers and briefly closed his eyes.
"You're drunk." He calmly stated and opened his eyes to meet hers.
"Me? Noooo. You smell good." She buried her head in the crook of his neck and pulled him closer.
"Kate you need to go to bed. Now." He grabbed her and pulled her away from him, so he was staring into her eyes.
Her eyes that were suddenly blazing with fire.
"Why do you keep pushing me away?" She screamed at him. Detective Beckett was long gone, and was replaced by a broken, aggravated and intoxicated Kate.
"Calm down." He reached out to touch her shoulder but she smacked his arm.
"No! Why am I not good enough anymore! What did I do to make you so mad Rick? Please just…just tell me." She whispered the end and broke out into sobs, making his heart clench. She might not have been sober, but everything she said still made him realize what a jerk he's been.
It wasn't worth telling her, she wasn't going to remember anyway.
"Let's get you to bed." He tried grabbing her arm but she just pushed him away.
"I want answers Castle! I-I love you and you just push me away like you want nothing to do with me!" She continued crying, and he stood there , unable to form coherent thoughts.
She loves him?
Couldn't be. She is drunk after all.
He had heard somewhere though that a drunk person's words were a sober person's thoughts.
He shook his head and pulled her into him, because as emotionally confused as he was, he felt horrible.
She let him hug her, and soon enough she was holding onto him like her life depended on it.
"I can't lose you Caaastle. I-don't leave. Stay here. Pleeeease?" She begged and he kissed the top of her head.
"I'm not going anywhere, let's go get some sleep." He ushered her to her bedroom and pulled up a trashcan next to her side of the bed.
Just in case.
He didn't know what would happen in the morning, but he knew that he had to take care of her tonight.
Because damnit he still loves her.
"Rick?" He turned his head and was pulled into a fiery kiss. He tried to pull away, because he only has to much self-control when it comes to this woman. She only pulled him closer, forcing her tongue into his mouth, and letting out a groan when he responded.
He didn't mean to make this go any further.
He didn't mean to respond to her kiss.
But his control was slipping fast.
He tried to catch his breath as her mouth started nibbling on his neck and her hands went under his shirt.
"Whoah hey! Hey." He pulled her face up and stared at her.
"No. You need sleep. C'mon." He tucked her in and she just stared at him in bewilderment.
"I knew I wasn't good enough." She started crying again and he sighed. Drunk Kate was definitely not easy to handle. He joined her in the bed and put an arm around her.
"Yes you are, but your drunk. And you need some sleep. I'll stay here with you, now c'mon it's late." He turned off the light and felt her snuggle closer to him.
"Rick?"
"Yeah?" He could see her staring up at him in the dark.
"I love you." She said and closed her eyes, drifting off into dreamland.
He doesn't know what to believe anymore.
He'll just have to deal with it in the morning.
Bam! Two chapters in one day! Haha so I'm seriously considering bumping this up to an M rating at some point, there's probably two chapters left of it anyway. Let me know what you're thinking!
REVIEW!
-Talar
