Disclaimer: I still don't own any part of Secret Life.

Ricky froze for a minute. Out of the corner of his eye, he could see her smile at him. Out of facial habit, he returned it with a smirk. Something in him made the smirk disappear. Now, he was just thinking. Not that it was easy with a slight fog in his thoughts. Seeing Amy smile. That was something that for some reason stopped his thinking for a good minute. As simple as it was, it mesmerized him.

"Are you okay Ricky?" she chuckled. Amy saw him return her gaze with one that stayed blank for a minute or two. Startled, he automatically shook his head. Images like that shouldn't be planted. He couldn't think of Amy like that.

"Yeah, yeah fine," he mumbled. Even though he knew he wasn't supposed to, something in him couldn't look away. This was nothing like the overly used flirtatious smiles he got from Adrian. Something about it was innocent, simple. Nothing brought it on. At least it wasn't in the extreme sense. On Amy, there was something natural about her expressions. He knew this, yet something in him jolted. What surprised him even more though, was the fact that he liked it.

"Are you sure? You've had that far away look on your face for a while now," she giggled. He smirked taking in the sound. It was quiet, soft. Just the way he remembered when he came over to help her practice. Ricky could see a light blush forming on her cheeks now. It took him a minute to realize that she was right. He was starring. From the look on her face he could see that she had figured it out. Amy discovered that the main attraction was her. When he himself came to the realization, he shook his head, trying to bring himself back into reality.

The only answer she got was a slight shift in a loose strand of hair, moved by his hand. She held back a gasp when she noticed how close his hand was to her face. Sitting there in his lap allowed her to feel a silent breath fly close to her ear. Amy closed her eyes, bringing herself closer to him. Not that there was much of a difference from the last time. They were already as close as they could get.

Coming to, she thought about it again. There's no way he wanted this. With that in mind, she backed away enough to give him space. Ricky was startled by her sudden backing away but kept his face expressionless. A small part of him wanted to take her back, keep her exactly where she was, but he refrained.

"What?" he smirked. "You afraid I'm gonna bite?" he asked. Amy could only shake her head, not trusting her shaky voice. And then it hit her. She'd never been this close to Ben. All they ever did was hold hands. She could tell by his movements that he was too afraid to do anything else. Even that was awkward. His hands were always shaking, and sometimes even clammy. Being this close to Ricky, there was something easy about it. Maybe it was part of the fact that they started out so close. It wasn't forced. And all of that surprised her, scared her even. It took him running his finger along her cheek to realize that she was crying.

"I…" she started. Ricky just looked at her, closing the gap between them, taking her to him.

"What's on your mind Amy?"

"Nothing, it's stupid," she whispered. He just looked at her, his eyes telling her that he knew differently. As hard as she tried to look away, something in her returned his gaze. "Ben. He never…did things like this," she whispered.

"What things?" he asked. Amy sighed, not exactly sure how to word it without it sounding ridiculous.

"He's never just…held me," she said softly.

"You mean to tell me, that in all the times you've cried, he's never done anything but watch?" he asked. She nodded, ducking her head sheepishly. Something in Ricky blazed with anger. He could feel every part of himself wanting to rip Ben apart. It was one thing to be insecure and spineless. But to just sit there while you're girlfriend's crying? That was just stupid. It was common sense! It angered him further to remember that this was Amy. Ben would leave not just any girl to cry by herself, he left Amy. Something in Ricky screamed "unacceptable". He still couldn't figure out why, but a red flag flew up. This piece of information had him holding her closer, more tightly.

"He thought he was invading my personal space or something," she said. Ricky rolled his eyes. He could hear Amy chuckle at his subtle reaction and simply looked at her. It was so nice to see her let loose, if only a little. He couldn't place the last time he'd seen her genuinely laughing.

"The kid needs a lesson in common decency," he said. "He also needs to grow a spine," he added.

"He has a spine," Amy mumbled. Ricky raised an eyebrow at her in question.

"Where?" he asked curiously. "Last I saw he was extremely immature and needy. Any guy who can't stand you even talking to someone else needs to grow up."

"He…he does trust me," she whispered.

"Amy, tell me honestly. How many nights have I gone over there, without hearing that Ben slammed you with questions about what we were doing? What I was doing over at the house or how long I would be there?"

"He didn't slam me with questions!" she defended. "He was curious," she mumbled.

"Oh give me a break," he laughed. "Open your eyes Ames. He's controlled everything you've done for the last year."

"You don't even know him Ricky! You have no right to judge him!" Now he could see that she was fuming. Setting John on the floor beside her she began pacing. All Ricky could do was watch as she came back and forth an estimated ten times in one minute, running her fingers angrily through her hair.

"Amy, I work with him," he said calmly. "I have a pretty good idea of what he's like. Aren't you mad at him? Why defend him if he's upset you?" he asked. Amy froze mid-pace, looking him right in the eye. They only starred at each other, not one of them saying a word. "Tell me Amy? Why do you care?"

"Because…because…"

"You gotta give me more than that," he laughed. Amy sighed, stopped her pacing and sat across from him.

"Because he's the only one who will ever really want me," he whispered.

"Oh please! That's a lie and you know it." She shot him a glare which immediately wiped the growing smirk off his face.

"Really Ricky? Do you honestly believe what you're telling me? Look me right in the eye and name a guy who wants a girl with a baby," she snorted. I do he thought.

"Yes Amy. There is someone out there, walking the streets that wants exactly what you have right now. Someone who will take you for exactly who you are with no conditions."

"He's gone…" she said quietly. "The only one who's ever wanted me is gone!" Without warning she burst into tears. Ricky looked at her helplessly, again asking himself why he agreed to do this. He sighed, coming to sit next to her.

"Again with the crying," he whispered. "I thought we agreed to keep that to a minimum," he said. A set of red rimmed, tear filled eyes looked up at him angrily. "I'm just kidding. Best to let it all out."

"No one's ever going to love me," she cried. "Not like this. Not when I've already been used," she said helplessly.

"You're not used Amy. You've had a baby. That doesn't mean you can't find someone who loves you both," he said gently. Not to mention willing to put up with me he added mentally.

"Who in the right mind would want a teenage mother?" Ricky sighed, trying his hardest to shield the impatience in his voice. They'd already answered this question six different times. Me he thought, gently threading his fingers through her hair.

"Someone will Amy. Someone who will look at you and remind himself everyday that he doesn't deserve you. That you're too good for him. He'll look you in the eye every day and tell you just how much you mean to him." He sure as hell didn't deserve to even have her in his life. Amy was too good, to precious to be tainted by friendship with him. Yet here she was.

"Who the hell would do that?" she asked through tears. This time she didn't need inviting. Amy found herself subconsciously gravitating into his lap. She was glad to see that just like the last time he didn't reject her. Ricky knew that he should have. He should be keeping a fair distance between them. They should never be this close. Again with no idea why, he let her head settle on his shoulder.

"I don't know Amy. I have no idea. One day, someone's going to come along though. You just have to be willing to wait."

"I don't even know why you're here. All I've done is cry."

"I'm here for you. Unless of course you don't want me to be. I'll be glad to get home. It'll give me a chance to have a little chat with the sausage prince." Please don't leave, not yet she pleaded. The look on her face said everything. "But you're not ready for me to leave yet," he said gently.

"How do you know that? You don't know me," she said. He smirked. He knew a lot more about her than she realized. In the last year he'd made a good job of picking up on her body language, her expressions. Why he'd done so, he had no clue.

"You're breakin' down at the drop of a hat Amy," he pointed out.

"So, what makes this any different from the last thousands of times I've cried over something?"

"You're hurt," he said softly. "That's a little different than all the other times."

"You've always done the hurting. How would you know?" One look at his face shut her up. She realized she'd stepped too far. Ricky saw pain. A different kind of pain but a pain none the less. "I'm sorry," she whispered.

"I've seen pain Amy. Pain that I wouldn't wish on my worst enemy. Of all people I hoped that it would never happen to you. After John happened, you didn't deserve anything else. But it happened and the last thing I want is to know that you're going through it alone."

"Why does it matter? I'm just the stupid French horn player that you slept with at band camp. You're Ricky Underwood; you're not supposed to care."

"You're not stupid Amy!" he shot back. "If anything it's me, for getting you here. Stuff happens. Amy, people make mistakes. I make mistakes. But there's nothing we can do to change what's been done. I don't know how many times I have to tell you how sorry I am before you finally believe me!" he growled, making her jump. "If I could go back, if I could fix it I would. Not that I regret John. He's the best thing that's happened to me. I'd go back and make sure I never hurt you like I did. But we can't. No more than you can change what happened with Ben."

"I know. I just wish…"

"We all wish things in life didn't happen the way they do. You're only human Amy."

"I…miss it," she said quietly.

"Miss what?"

"Life," she said simply. She heard Ricky laugh and just looked at him. After a minute she realized why he was laughing and joined him. "Okay yeah, I see your point. I'm living life. I just didn't expect it to go like this," she said.

"Nobody expects anything."

"I don't want to be here anymore," she admitted, completely changing the topic of conversation.

"Ames we've talked about this," he sighed. She couldn't help smiling. That was the second time today she'd called her by something other than her name. "You gotta finish. The Amy I know ain't a quitter, I've never seen you quit anything. You sure as hell aren't gonna start now," he said with a tone of finality in his voice.

"I don't want to be anywhere. I can't be here. I definitely can't be home…"

"Why can't you be here?" he asked.

"I'm not good enough," she said.

"That's fucking ridiculous," he laughed. "You're the best in your section!" She smiled.

"Thanks Ricky, that's nice to hear. Even though it's not true," she blushed.

"They have no idea what they're talking about," he grumbled.

"It's okay. Takes the pressure off."

"Well one thing's for sure, you're not goin' home," he said. She was somewhat surprised. This was the first time he ever really pushed her to do something. It didn't come out forcefully. It was more like continuous encouragement. Something she expected from her parents, maybe even Ashley, but never did she see it coming from Ricky.

"Why can't I go home Mr. Underwood?" she giggled. Again his heart lurched when the sound floated through the air.

"Amy it's like finishing a race. How stupid would you feel if you just stopped running before you hit the finish line? Thousands of people are watching you and you just quit. You're gonna get run down by the people behind you. You're just gonna lay there, letting them do what they want with you. Do you really wanna give them that kind of power over you?"

"I don't have thousands of people watching," she corrected.

"That doesn't mean you don't have people supporting you. "Your parents, your sister, your friends, me."

"You?" Ricky rolled his eyes.

"Look at him," he said directing her attention to an occupied little boy who sat playing with is toys. Amy did look at him. After a couple of minutes her gaze met Ricky's again.

"What does he have to do with you?" she asked.

"We're his parents Amy. We made a promise to work together. And working together means supporting each other, not just him."

"So you're doing it out of obligation?" she said much louder than she intended.

"Amy I really don't know how else to tell you that hasn't already been said," he groaned. "I didn't have to come here."

"But you did," she smiled. The sight of it made Ricky's heart race.

"Can you guess why?"

"I called you crying my eyes out," she scoffed.

"Well there's that," he agreed. "I care about you Amy. I think I've already told you that." Even though he had, she was still somewhat shocked. It wasn't like him to admit his feelings.

"Thank you," she whispered.

"Anytime," he smirked. "Hey can I grab a shower?" Amy nodded pointing her finger in the direction of the bathroom. "Great. If anyone calls just let it go to voicemail. If it's him, just ignore it." Amy nodded, more than willing to comply with the second request. "Once I'm out, we'll figure out what to do for the day," he said. A day with Ricky. This should be interesting she thought. "Back in a little bit," he smirked.

Once he closed the door and started the running water, Amy laid her head back tiredly. There was something about him, as irritating as he was, that made everything okay. She decided to simply play the "father of my baby card" and let it be. Because really, that's all it was. If it wasn't for John she wouldn't even be in the same room as Ricky. They were just too different. They came from completely opposite worlds. So, why can't I stop thinking about him?

The vibrating of an incoming text let her open her eyes again. She saw that he left it on her bedside table and reached for it from her place on the floor. She had to blink several times before she was sure she knew which name she saw. Amy knew she shouldn't but something in her couldn't stop her finger from pressing down on the center button. opening the message.

Are you going to tell her?

"Tell me about what?" she asked confused to an empty room.

A/N: There you go! Let me know how it went please! :)