Chapter Three: Animal Instincts
"I don't know about you, Harry, but I slept pretty darn well last night after the rain died down a bit," Ron shouted across the Gryffindor dining table, not bothering to chew before he spoke. Breakfast was served two hours before the school hours began, but Harry and Ron wanted first dibs on the fats and carbs.
Harry acted like he didn't hear Ron because the fact was he couldn't sleep a wink without thinking about the idea he had had last night, and Ron's lion of a snore kept him up most of the night. That was okay though because Ron had already forgotten what he had said.
"Ronald, have you ever felt…uncomfortable after speaking to a large number of your peers?" asked Harry whispering under his breath, he made sure not to speak loud enough for Hermione to overhear him. She had been acting quite strange…stranger today. Ron just shrugged and took a two mouth full bite of sweet potato griddlecakes, which he regretted after choking. Harry sighed and started making heart figures over and over again with his finger on the rough wooden bench.
"Harry, I do say you do look like you didn't get a pinch of beauty sleep…it is required by many muggles doctors to have at least eight to nine hours before starting a hectic day of educational wonders…I, however, make sure to get at least twelve to thirteen hours on a regular night to daybreak schedule," Hermione babbled on and on until Harry completely zoned her out and was finding it quite funny just watching her mouth move up and down.
"Did you have a merry "Day after Valentines"?" asked Harry interrupting her so she would have to think about her answer at it would give him at least ten minutes without having to hear her voice; it was like a headache in Snape's class plus nails on a chalk board. Just as planned, Hermione put her perfectly cleaned knuckles on her wrist and began to think up an educational way to answer the effortless question.
Harry's hazel weary eyes glanced back and forth across the rows in the mess hall, checking out the lassies as they passed by. Girls of all sizes, shapes, features…features, hair tints, style, heights, attractiveness or ugliness, big mouths or small teeth, smiley preps and emotional Goths, Hufflepuffles and Ravenclaws, and then he lost his train of thought because Malfoy strutted smoothly across the table, Harry gave the walk a five and then shook the thought away as soon as possible.
"Harry, are you going to eat that slice of turkey leg…mmm…or your grits…or your juice…or your scrambled eggs…how 'bout I take your 'fast off you? You do kind of need to lose some weight, Harry," asked Ron. Ron had cleaned off the plate before Harry could even nod and then looked over to Hermione to start mooching off of her; she had pound cake.
Harry thought to himself and wondered why he was starting to now just realize the beauty of a woman; Hermione looked over at him and smiled…Harry then corrected his statement. Some women are lovely, cute, well turned-out, smarter then a million men put together…or just a million Rons, petites, lengthy… That was when Harry felt like a disgusting, sniper at a victim, bird on its prey, a Rockford on his three dates, and animal, a cold blooded sex crazed beast. Harry's ghostly pale face went to the brightness shade of ruby and he put his face down on his arms, secretly still looking at the aisles.
"Ron, is it immoral to look at a women like a slab of steak…," Harry hissed under his arms making sure Hermione didn't catch into the conversation, that would be the end of it…Harry Potter, you are a wrong boy to even suggesting asking that question to yourself or even a peer such as Ronald who has clearly half of a swine's brain.
Harry waited impatiently for an answer; Ron just kept on chewing and laughing at a girl who tripped at the Slytherin table.
"That lass just fell on her bum, dear my…a big bum. Lassies are meat, Harry; some are hamburgers, some are mystery meatloaves, tofu, and then, very rarely, you find a filet mignon. That one there's a meatloaf," shouted Ron, still laughing and pointing at the girl, who was almost in tears.
"Ronald Wealsey, how dare you compare a female to a food group, just wait until I tell your sister and she tells your mother and then your father and then the teachers at Hogwarts. Do you consider me a chicken or a mutton loaf, you scrub? You…you are lower then the prices at a thrift superstore," spluttered Hermione, slapping Ron across the face, all of the food in his mouth launched from his cheeks and onto Harry's lap.
"You are not even a pork loaf, Herm, your more of a… stick of jerky whenever I get hungry," smirked Ron, a comment that earned him a kick in the groin for under the table. Harry managed to napkin up all of the turkey, mashed potatoes, and griddle cakes from his pants…a large stain remained in its place.
"I knew it was a perfect day to show off my new steel-toed black boots. Have a pleasurable time trying making babies, Ronald!" yelled Hermione getting up from the table and stomping to the entrance of the mess hall, she managed to flip her hair back and it made Harry give her a second glance, …animal kept running through his head.
"Yeah, she totally wants to shag me," whispered Ron, curled into the fetal position. The girl who had fell on her behind earlier passed the table, pointing at Ron and snickering; karma always gets the best of us.
As Harry went to get up to go give Hermione a high five for knocking Ron in the balls, he noticed someone who caught his eye. The girl was leaving the other end of the Gryffindor table with a pack of her friends; magical school cliques. She had centered herself between Ginny Weasley and a girl with a pimply face. Ginny turned and looked at him but he ignored her, he kept his eyes on the target.
"Ron, look behind you, hurry, who is that lass?" asked Harry, sitting back down so the girl wouldn't see him watching her with a amazement, a fascination, but not like an animal looking at a source of protein, he looked at her as if she was a goddess, a flower; an instinct that seemed to just occur to him.
"Lower your standards, hot-shot, that cheetah is on the prowl for herself some Ronald…rawh!" snarled Ron, taking a glance at the girl and a glance at Harry. Harry admired her petite body, her honey almost sun-kissed straight hair, and her piercing gold eyes emerging from the hair covering the side of her left cheek, Harry was in deep shock. Ginny moved faster than the girl and tried to make it noticeable that she was flaunting a new wool robe; her last one was Ron's old one. Harry on the other hand didn't even notice Ginny leave the midst of the clique.
"That my man is the filet mignon out of this fish market. Melrose McArthur. The older sister to one of my sister's perky little wiry friends Jenny McArthur, just transferred here from Beaubatons," Ron explained as the perfect lass strutted behind Ron's head and the glimpse of her was gone.
"Animals, Ron…men are animals," sighed Harry still picturing her and setting her in his memory; her blue plain dress, her slightly pale skin, her breathtaking…beauty. Harry was in a case of sure, but sad, puppy love with just an appearance. Harry noticed Malfoy chasing out the doors after the clique several minutes later; it made Harry angry because his walk and improved…Harry gave him a six this time.
Harry and Ron got up to head for their first class of the day. Ron was walking much slower then usually but he had managed to walk, he got kicked their many times and this one didn't seem to bother him. Harry on the other hand was tripping over his feet, still drooling over the lass.
"Harry, men are animals but you would never guess how many animal-like darn women can be," blurred Ron making Harry laugh and the two strolled off to Potions. Ginny turned around the column in the hallway and tagged along, from afar; she wanted to know if Harry was going to mention him staring at her brand new robe.
