Sunrise, for the First Time

Disclaimer: Blah blah, I don't own stuff by Stephenie Meyer, including Twilight characters or titles or copyrights or dowries, which is remarkably unfortunate, considering making money off of wasted time would be a very lucrative profession for me.

Chapter 3: Lost and Found

I found my way through the day. Jacob offered to talk about what had happened; knowing I would refuse, he was prepared to change the subject abruptly. Charlie was gone, probably fishing, which was just as well. I needed some time to work myself up to pretending like I was okay again.

"So I'm thinking no more cliff-diving for you -- In fact, let's do away with all death-defying acts for the time being." Jake smiled down at me and grabbed my hand; we were walking down the beach, and every once in a while he would skip to the shoreline and step in the water. An onlooker might wonder how he could stand the cold temperature on a chilly day like this. "But we could take a day trip to Seattle or something. What do you think? It's something to do, right? I'd even let you take me shopping."

"I don't like shopping, Jake," I said harshly, but then I felt guilty. I tried to smile at him, though he didn't seem phased by my impatience. "But we could go to see a movie or something, I suppose."

"Yeah, a movie. But no horror films this time. And don't invite Captain Pukeface."

"Okay." As long as it wasn't a romantic comedy. Maybe something depressing, like something about old people dying or a religious film.

"Hey, Bells." Jake turned me to face him. "I want you to know that if you ever need me for anything, I'll be there, you know? I mean, I know you know that, but… Look, if any of those bloodsu-- Cullens ever try to contact you again, or if they hurt you, I swear I'll tear their throats out, all you have to do is ask." He paused. "In fact, I may do it without asking."

I started to get angry, but then I realized he was only trying to make me laugh and lighten up about the subject. Sure, it was ineffective, but the gesture was nice. "I know, Jake. Thanks."

"No problem."

"Jake?"

"Yeah."

"It's cold."

"It is? Huh." He smiled, then put his arm around me. His body heat warmed my shoulders instantly, but I shivered anyway. "Alright, alright, you wimp. Let's go inside."

I furrowed my brow in feigned anger, but he chuckled and threw me over his shoulder, running to Billy's house while I laughed.

The next week passed by in a blur. It was spring break, which was very unfortunate, as I had nothing to do. Jake tried to fill my time when he could, but between school and "pack-time" most of my days were filled with heavy, gray, overwhelming solitude. Every time the phone rang, my heartbeat escalated; every time I tried to sleep, my eyes filled with tears. Edward's call had reopened the wound that had somewhat healed, and now the scar tissue was being stubborn about reforming, afraid it would only be ripped away again. I pretended to be content for Charlie, but I wasn't sure how convincing I was. Sometimes, during dinner, I caught him looking at me with a pained, helpless expression.

Then, one night, as I was lying in bed and mentally begging through silent tears for sleep to come and take me, I heard a soft thump! near my window. I ignored it, questioning my sanity again, but a moment later, there was a weight on my bed and a cold hand against my cheek, wiping away my tears.

A velvet voice cut through the silence. "Bella."

I kept my eyes closed and sucked in cold air, noting the sweet smell that filled my nostrils, but not believing it. I was, after all, barking mad.

"Bella, look at me."

It was a request, not a command, but I had no choice but to fulfill it, even if my mind was playing tricks on me.

I looked at him, letting my eyes adjust to the dark. The moonlight filtered in through the window, reflecting off his beautiful, translucent skin. His bronze hair was just as I remembered it, wavy and thick; I instantly wanted to run my fingers through it. And his eyes… Oh, his wonderful, deep, tortured black onyx eyes.

I gave in to the delusion. If this was insanity, may I forever be locked away in a padded cell. "Edward," I managed, then began sobbing. The seam in my middle ripped and forced me inward; I wrapped my arms around myself and buried my chin in my chest.

Instantly, his cool arms were around me, forcing my cheek against his stone chest, allowing my tears to soak his shirt. He was kissing my head and stroking my hair, murmuring into my ear. "I'm so sorry, Bella… I'm so sorry… Don't cry, shh, don't cry, my love…"

And thus, we greeted dawn.