A/N: Hello again. Thanks for the review everyone, Glad you're all enjoying it so far. I realize it is kind of slow going, but it should pick up after this, I think…eh, I dunno. It just writes itself.

FYI: Every chapter moves the story forward since the confession and each chapter will have a flashback.

Dean and Ian…ughh. I know, I know. But every story needs a couple of a-holes, makes the angst so much better, right?

Usual disclaimers apply. I don't have a Beta, so all those mistakes since Ch. 1 are all mine. Yep.

Flashbacks are in Italics.

Enjoy!

As if sensing someone looking at her, Maura starts to stir.

Jane makes no attempt to leave or hide that fact that she's sat in a chair across from her ex for the last 20 minutes just staring.

Maura rubs her eyes and covers a yawn. She sees Jane and sits up running a hand through her hair to smooth down her loose curls.

"Jane…" she starts surprised to see the detective, voice still hoarse from crying herself to sleep. "…good morning," she finishes, not knowing what else to say. She wondered if Jane remembered her confession from last night, or rather very early morning, as she glances at the clock across from her.

"'Morning," Jane smiles, "Thanks for um, taking care of me last night," she gestures towards the bedroom. "I'm sorry you had to sleep on the couch."

She gives Jane a weak smile. "It's quite alright Jane. I don't mind the couch. I'm just glad that we made it up here." Maura again becomes quiet. Her finger unconsciously twirling the new attachment on her finger, a new nervous habit she picked the moment she put it on.

Jane eyeing the ME's movement glances down and finally notices the ring.

Maura's engagement ring.

She unconsciously looks towards her bedroom, thinking about another engagement ring that is secured safely in a red velvet box, safely tucked away in the back of her bottom dresser.

The one she would have maybe, probably, most likely have given to Maura if Maura didn't drop a bomb on her many nights ago.


"Fuck, Maura. Please. Please don't do this." Jane begs.

At Maura's silence, knowing she was all but losing this battle for good, Jane cries out, "I love you."

Silence. And then a slap vibrates across the room. Jane on reflex touches a hand to her left cheek, feeling the stinging effects of the petite ME's hand. "NO. Don't you dare." Maura shouts, a thin finger angrily shaking at the brunette in front of her.

At Jane's words, Maura feels her face growing hot. Eyes narrowed, zoning in on the detective in front of her. Chests heaving up and down. Breathe coming out in harsh spurts.

Those three words. Those same three words that Maura wanted to hear for the last 9 months have finally been spoken by the beautiful woman in front of her. But she knew it was for all the wrong reasons. She knew that was a desperate resort. She can see it in the detective's eyes. She doesn't need to hear those three words tonight. It'll come sincerely and at another time. Tonight she needs something else. Something more.

Maura not wanting to see the anguish and heartbroken look on the detective's face, slightly turns her head. "I'm sorry Jane. But I can't keep doing this. It's not fair. I won't be your second choice whenever Dean comes into town. I won't be your secret fuck..." Jane raises her eyebrows at Maura's language "...whenever it is convenient for you," her voice elevating, cursing herself for the slight tremble, wanting to be stern and direct.

Taking a deep breath, silently encouraging herself, she continues slowly and sincerely. "I love you Jane, but I need you to love me. Truly love me. Don't just tell me, show me. Be with me. Kiss me in public. Hold my hand. Start a life together. Tell our family and friends. Let them see how good we are together. Because we can be Jane, we are." Maura looks straight into glassy brown eyes. She reaches up and cups Jane's chin, turning her around to face her. Her voice softens, "we could be so good together. This is it Jane. You asked what I wanted. I want this. You are it for me Jane Clementine Rizzoli. Please let me be it for you." Maura pleads, palms still, fingers moving upwards to caress the red cheek, remnants of the slap clearly still visible.

The silence is deafening. The seconds tick by… 17, 18, 19 seconds pass. Jane wants to formulate an answer but she's can't. Her heart is beating wildly in her chest, sweat forming on her palms, she feels hot all of a sudden. She desperately wants to say what Maura wants to hear. What she, herself, wants to hear. Can she do it? Can she be with Maura? Truly be with her? For everyone to know they are a couple? Is it that easy?

Staring straight into Jane's brown orbs, Maura can see the turmoil brewing behind those beautiful brown eyes ghosting with unshed tears.

Jane's face scrunches in defeat. She takes a large gulp and bites down on her teeth. She slowly blinks to allow tears eagerly awaiting deployment to fall rapidly down her cheeks.

Just as Jane opens her mouth to respond, she eyes movement from the blonde across from her.

If there was one thing that Maura hated about herself. It was having the ability to read changes in facial muscle and body language. At this moment, for instance, Maura already knows what Jane is going to say. Or rather what Jane is not going to say. It's what she has been wanting to for months. For Jane to truly be with her. Out in the open, unabashedly, unashamed. For her to say yes to Maura's final request.

Realizing it wasn't coming, Maura clasps a hand to her mouth, trying her best to suppress an anguish cry. It skips out anyway. Along with full blown tears streaming down her face. Without waiting for an answer, she swiftly turns around and runs out of Jane's apartment leaving behind a speechless and heartbroken detective in her wake.


They both think about that night.

For Jane, it was constantly.

What was her answer going to be? Maura didn't stick around to find out. Maura didn't hear her out. Just assumed she was going to say no. What if she would have said yes?

There was no point in what ifs now. A progressive chain of events changed the dynamics for both of them immediately following the break up. The timing was all wrong. It was like the universe didn't want them to be together. Plotted against them, like a bad lifetime movie; Dean coming back, shooting Doyle, Ian returning. Everything was unraveling right in front of them. Unforeseen circumstances prevented the two past lovers from reconciling.

Breaking Jane out of her thoughts, Maura stands up. "Well I'm glad you're okay. I'm going to go. Bass needs to be fed and I'm sure Ian's…" she catches herself and stops.

"Right...Ian." Jane solemnly repeats.

Jane sees a remorseful expression cross the ME's face.

Not wanting the ME to leave feeling guilty, Jane tried to appease the situation. "I'll drive you," she blurted out.

Maura already finished putting on her heels and was now folding up the blankets replies, "it is okay Jane, I can get a cab downstairs."

"Maur, it's below 30 outside. I'm not going to have you wait in the freezing cold this early for a cab. It's no problem, really. Let me just grab my keys," she looks around the living room, 'if I can find 'em," she mumbles.

Taking a defeated breath, she stood up and walked to her room. Once inside, she looks around, eyeing her dresser she unconsciously feels herself walk forward. Opening the bottom drawer, she reaches in the back and feels the small velvet box against trembling fingers. Pulling it out, she gets lost in the smooth curves of the gold band, three diamonds adorning at the top…

"Jane." Maura calls out snapping Jane out of her trance. She snaps the box shut. "I'll be right out," she called back.

Taking another long look, she stuck the box back in its rightful place.

She's too late.

A/N: Whew! Damn, where does this angst come from. It's kind of scaring me.

I guess this balances all the fluff from all the GAYYY we saw on this week's R&I.

Til' next time!