Thanks for your comments and reviews. I hope you enjoy this chapter.
Chapter 3: The Shock
The door opens and Penny is standing there in her grey track pants and Nebraska football jersey.
"Hey Sheldon, what's up?"
Sheldon asks her to sit down on the couch. "Penny, I have some bad news."
As Sheldon walks in and Penny sits down, she asks Sheldon "Why what's up?" Penny had this look on her face as it turned into a fearful look. With a slight concern in her voice she says "Is Leonard O.K. Sheldon?"
Sheldon still had this sad look on his face and Penny knew something was really wrong.
"Sheldon…. Did something happen to Leonard?" Penny said in a louder voice.
"Leonard has packed and moved out"
"What are you talking about? Why would Leonard do that? Sheldon, that's a mean thing to say to me", thinking that Sheldon was just playing a bad joke on her. Penny started to panic even further as the expression on Sheldon's face still hadn't changed.
Penny jumped up and ran across the hallway straight to Leonard's room while she called out his name. "Leonard…. Leonard." As Penny burst through the Leonard's bedroom door, she looked around and saw all of Leonard's possessions were gone. Nothing was left except the larger furniture that he accumulated over the years. Penny's body was frozen and she couldn't move a muscle. Her legs started to give out and the lights grew dim very quickly.
Penny woke up a few seconds later and found herself lying across Leonard's mattress. She realized after a few minutes that she must have passed out. It was a good thing that she was near Leonard's mattress at the time. If she hadn't, she would have passed out on the hardwood floor. As she slowly raised herself up on the mattress, she could feel her whole body start to tremble. She made herself sit up on Leonard's mattress when Sheldon walked in.
"Penny, Are you O.K?"
Penny was still in shock and didn't quite make out what Sheldon was saying. All she could see was Sheldon's mouth moving but no sound came out. Seconds later she could hear Sheldon say something.
"Are you OK Penny?" Sheldon asked again.
Penny slowly pulled herself up on the bed. "Why did Leonard move out?" Penny asked Sheldon as her voice cracked.
"He moved out" Sheldon stating the obvious.
"I know that Sheldon…. but why? Why couldn't he talk to me about this? I could've helped him. I'm his friend too!"
"Penny, Leonard didn't even talk to me about it either. I am just in shock as you are. I don't know for sure Penny, but you might find the reason in this letter. It's from Leonard".
Penny grabbed the envelope from Sheldon and opened the letter and started reading.
My Dearest Penny,
When I first gazed upon you through your door on your moving day, I knew that you were the one for me. I knew it wasn't going to be an easy task. I didn't even know if you would even be interested in me at all. All I could hope for was at least your friendship.
As time passed, I fell deeply in love with you. From that point on I knew I couldn't love anyone else. Every single woman who I encountered or had a relationship with was always compared with you. I didn't do it consciously, it just happened. My thoughts were always with you.
At night when going to sleep, all I could think of was being with you. Even just the thought of going to the movies or having dinner with you brought so much joy to my heart. I even dreamt of us walking down by the park hand in hand. I know this sounds kind of corny but it really made me happy. My life would be in total bliss. I couldn't think of living my life without you.
When we finally became a couple, oh my God! It felt like I didn't have a single worry in the world. My body felt like it was as light as a feather and could soar way above the heavens. I had this big glow radiating deep from within me that was brighter and warmer than the sun. It was like the heavens had opened up and all I could feel was your warmth and glow of your smile. When the tenderness of your lips touched mine, I thought I was tasting honey, so sweet. I was on top of the world. My life would never be the same for me again. This was the happiest moments of my entire life.
Then I said the big "I love you" and "Will you marry me?" You couldn't or didn't reply. My heart slowly broke. I went from such an extreme high to a bottomless void where I felt so empty. I never felt so much pain and heartache. I didn't want to tell or show you how I felt. I wanted you to believe that I was strong and O.K. with the situation. Well, I guess I wasn't as strong as I thought. It hurt so much at times that I found it really hard to live across the hall from you. Just watching you come and go was so difficult. Knowing that we could only be friends again was devastating. I've really tried to put on a strong face, but I could only do that for so long. I just didn't have the strength, energy or heart to keep it up, especially when I was around you.
Penny my love, please do not feel bad because of me. There is nothing that you did or said that was wrong. It was all my dreams and illusions. Love is a two-way street. You can't expect or hope for someone loves to be returned to you just because you love them. It's just doesn't work that way. Two people have to have the same feelings towards each other or else it's just a one-sided affair. Unfortunately, this is what we had. That's probably the reason you couldn't reply the same back to me. I completely understand now. You didn't have the same feelings as I did. You probably felt pressured being put in that position and for that I am so sorry. I never wanted to put you in that predicament and force you to say something that you weren't ready for or wanted to say. This is something that I realized and it has no bearing on you. Don't forget, I was in love with you even before we were even friends.
You also don't need to be in a commitment now. You have your career in front of you and you need to pursue that now more than anything else. I know you will do great one day and you will become the aspiring actress that you've always dreamed of.
So with regret, I need to leave. I need some time for myself and for some self-healing. Penny you are a smart, kind, generous and beautiful person. I will always cherish our love, friendship and the time that we had together forever. For that alone I will always be eternally grateful to you. You literally changed my life and the lives of our friends forever. As the old saying goes, "It is better to have loved and lost, than to never have loved at all".
Take care Penny, I wish you all the best. Don't worry about me. I will be fine. I just need time to straighten my thoughts and welcome back reality. Maybe one day our paths might cross again in the future. If it does I hope we can still be friends and maybe more if time heals all wounds.
Love Always and Forever,
Leonard.
Penny burst into a deafening cry and tears streamed down her face. She felt like her heart was just torn out of her body. She realized that the reason for Leonard's leaving was because of her. Penny dropped the letter as she placed her hands over her heart and fell back on the bed crying.
Hope you enjoyed this chapter. Please review and let me know what you think.
Tks
