Hello Reader,

Hope you enjoy this. I sure enjoyed freaking Byakuya out. Pfft who doesn't?

Aaaaand about the enu that Yuzu made...I just got all that from the assassinations please.

and also, watch out for the next chapter. This dinner ain't over yet, folks.


"I'm sorry about my dad," Ichigo whisphered as they all sat around the dining table.

Rukia didn't say anything. Instead, she held Ichigo's hand under the table and gave it a gentle squeeze. That was comfort enough for Ichigo.

Byakuya sat at the head of the table with Isshin across him; Rukia sat to his right, with the Kurosaki boy beside her while Karin and Yuzu sat to his left. The noble Kuchiki was actually quite impressed with the food that Yuzu had prepared. There were dumplings, Autumn Udon with Vegetables, Hiyayakko and Oden. Sure enough, it tasted heavenly. Yuzu had blushed when Byakuya commended her for her cooking skills; Isshin beamed like the proud father that he was.

Rukia was quite impressed at how cool Karin was in Byakuya's presence. She did not hesitate to ask him questions, like, what was the most difficult part of being a captain; why was his zanpakuto named Senbonzakura; and was Abarai Renji a satisfactory lieutenant?

Byakuya answered all these questions and had even laughed at the last one.

Poor Renji. And here he thought he was finally breaking through Byakuya' wall of ice and warming up to the guy. Motherfucking Renji, Ichigo thought as he took a sip of his tea.

Not a man to waste precious time though, Byakuya cut the small talk short and went straight to the point. "So, Kuroskai. About you and my sister."

Ichigo choked on his tea while Isshin slammed his fist on the table, exclaiming, "FINALLY!"

Rukia, not wanting for things to go awry, decided to speak first, "Um…allow me to explain, brother."

But Byakuya cut her off with the raise of his hand. "I'd rather hear it from the ryoka."

Isshin bristled at that. "Ryoka? I think bad boy would be the right term! Chicks dig the rebels, don't they son? Eh eh?" he said, nudging at Ichigo.

"Quit it, old man! I don't know what the hell you're talking about!"

"Don't be shy, my boy," Isshin pulled Ichigo by the neck and gave him a noogie, "C'mon. Tell ol' Byakuya 'bout that time you had Rukia whimpering inside your room."

Byakuya spat his tea out; Rukia fell off her chair; Ichigo almost had a heart attack; Yuzu covered her mouth in surprise; Karin face palmed; and Isshin patted himself on the back.

Ichigo rushed to help Rukia back into her seat. Byakuya, who was trying in vain to recover from that very improper tea spitting, found it hard to control his anger. "Care to explain this, Kurosaki?" he said through gritted teeth.

Ichigo paled. "It's not what you think, Byakuya."

Rukai nodded. She was practically shaking in fear. "We had been fighting a particularly strong hollow that night, and I wounded myself badly –"

"She had a broken wrist and a stab wound deeper than the Grand Canyon –"Ichigo interjected.

"And we couldn't go to Urahara's anymore since I was hurt too badly –"

"So I thought that I'd treat her wounds instead –"

"And Ichigo used this anti-septic on my wound and it really hurt –"

"But she couldn't scream since it was already the wee hours of the morning and she'd probably wake the whole town up –"

"So I bit down on Ichigo's blanket and cried. Nothing happened, brother –"

"Nothing at all –"

"I swear." Ichigo and Rukia finished together.

Byakuya blinked. Karin and Yuzu just looked at the flustered couple, mouths opened. In a table full of people too shocked to speak, Isshin raised his voice, "THAT WAS ADORABLE! OH, MASAKI! DID YOU HEAR THAT? THEY WERE FINISHING EACH OTHER'S SENTENCE! IT CAN ONLY BE TRUE LOVE!"

Byakuya ignored Isshin, directing his attention to his sister and unwanted boyfriend instead. "Are you telling me that you two did not sleep together?"

Ichigo and Rukia blushed. "No, we did not, brother."

"Although they do sleep in the same room," Isshin added, fiddling with his fork.

Ichigo kicked his father on the leg, hard. "What?" Isshin asked, massaging his shin.

Byakuya gripped his own fork so hard that it bent. "So, the two of you sleep in the same room, but don't sleep together? I would like to assume that Kurosaki's room is big enough to cater to two futons, yet, judging by the size of this house, I doubt that is possible. I find it hard to believe that you don't sleep on the same bed with this impolite rascal, Rukia."

"But, we don't, brother!" Rukia protested.

"Do enlighten me."

"Rukia sleeps in Ichigo's closet," Karin said, tired of all the bickering and misunderstandings. Ichigo glared at her. "What? You'd rather Byakuya think you and Rukia do the dirty in your room instead of telling the truth?"

"I'd rather that," Isshin sighed, "that way we can just skip ahead to the wedding and I can finally take care of my grandchildren."

"Can you not discuss that in front of me, Kurosaki Isshin?" Byakuya said exasperatedly. Goodness knows he did not need to imagine little orange-haired tots squirming in Rukia's arms. It was too early for that. He gave Ichigo a murderous look and said in a very slow and grave voice, emphasizing every word, "Let's get this clear, Ryoka. You let my sister, a Kuchiki who's slept in the softest bed in Soul Society all her life living with me, sleep in your cramped closet?"

Ichigo shrugged. "I figured you wouldn't approve if she slept with me. And besides, I stuffed a bed inside my closet. I'm pretty sure it's comfortable."

To say that Byakuya lost his temper that night would be an understatement.