A Guide to Becoming an Evil Overlord - Chapter III

Chapter III

Loyal and Extremely Well Behaved Underlings.

The next thing you need are loyal underlings, or if you wish to use a more eloquent term, followers. These people should not question anything you say or hide anything from you. The sole purpose in their life should be to serve and make you happy. It would be suitable to have at least 20 extremely close loyal ones and then collect the ones with more brawn than brain to be your first attack line. Any pathetic souls you see on your road to glory must be treated right so they will understand that what you are aiming for is the correct way for life to be. If any of these followers decide to turn their back on you and betray you then there is only one thing you must do.

You must kill them. (eliminate them..?)

There is no room for mercy when dealing with followers; they must be swiftly dealt with or chaos may ensue. Additionally, no personal relations should be carried out with followers. The risk that this brings has been seen many times in history. A strong and fearless leader would give up everything he/she has stood for just because a follower they became close to died, or switched sides or succumbed to a fatal spoon stabbing.

By no means are you to bestow everlasting power on your followers, this would put to waste a great deal of your work and might force you into killing one or more of your loyal supporters.

There are many ways you can gain your loyal supporters. You can lure them with false promises, blackmail them, use mind control on them, threaten their family, use Asiatic String magic on them or control their feet so they have to tap-dance every time they disobey you. There are many creative ways you can come up with to make people follow you.

Tom looked up from the last words in the sentence, "Okay, already have followers."

"Hmm?" Anthony looked up from the Quidditch magazine he had skived from one of their dorm mates.

Tom raised an eyebrow at Anthony, while he muttered, "Did it say anywhere in here that they had to be capable of reading?"

As if right on cue Anthony leaned over to Matthew, "Hey Matthew, what does this word mean? AB-ILIT-Y?"

Matthew looked over and scoffed, "Come on Anthony, obviously it means to drink out of a glass cup." Matthew turned away to find a comfortable position on the couch to lie down, "Where have you been living, under a rock?"

Tom rolled his eyes, there was no issue with these two simpletons; they had no clue what they were doing and Tom was surprised that they had passed every year at Hogwarts. Though he was sure at least one of them was getting extra help in every subject other than Herbology. He sighed; there was no worry about them trying to take over his reign over the world…once he took over the world. However Cygnus could be a problem, though he was currently scratching out a letter to someone. Tom knew that Cygnus was intelligent; possibly as intelligent as he was and therefore he was a threat. However, at this moment he knew that Cygnus would not dream of staging a rebellion against him. But Tom knew that once a sliver of suspicion surrounded Cygnus he would be a dead man.

He shook his head slightly; depressed by the possible outcome of one of his closest followers.

Tom then started wondering, he needed to call the something other than just 'followers', there was something very general about the term that made him shake his head.

He wanted something that would send terror into people's hearts when they heard the name. Something akin to his own evil name; which he still had to work on. Something that embodied what he stood for and what he wanted to accomplish.

He had two main goals; immortality and world domination.

Immortality Domineers. It was a mouthful.

Everlasting Overlords. But they weren't the Overlord's he was the only Overlord. They just had to be meaningless puppets.

Everlasting Puppets. While it made sense it would just sound stupid if his war cry were to be, 'Everlasting Puppets, attack!'

Well they also take life from people so…

Mortality Consumers. It sounded like they were customers at the local mortality store.

Life Stealers. Something about it just bothered him.

Life Eaters. He could work with that.

Without bothering to get the opinion of the three boys, he made a mental note about the Life Eaters, flipped the page and started reading.


Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter.

A/N: Aloha. I hope that this isn't just uselessness that I am writing and that I am just pretending that it's worth something. :)

AND Batman: Arkham Asylum is honestly the funnest thing since ever.

Enjoy.