A/N: owns all things Twilight. This is my mind at work, playing with her characters for pure enjoyment. I hope you enjoy reading it as much as I enjoyed writing it.

Lead Me Not Into Temptation

Chapter 3

A short time later, I was sitting across a small table from Bella. I had chosen the table nearest the food, so that the unpleasant smells of lasagna and chicken fingers would slightly mask the delicious scent of Bella that filled the air.

I had managed to avoid eating anything myself, telling Bella that I had a snack just before making my rounds. I did not mention that the snack had been the blood of forest animals, of course. So I sat with my hands folded politely while Bella ate, doing my best to provide answers to her questions about the side effects of the chemotherapy regime that Cassy was receiving.

We sat for about thirty minutes before I had answered the last of Bella's inquiries, and then our conversation turned onto the subject of Bella's studies. I was curious as to what had prompted her volunteerism here at the hospital, and I found myself feeling truly sad for her as she told me the story of watching her mother die of cancer during her first two years of high school. When she explained how her father, by then divorced from her mother for over ten years, had taken time away from his job to travel to his former wife's bedside in Arizona and read to her from the latest romance novels that were her favorites, my heart felt warm. This young woman had obviously inherited her compassion and sensitivity from her father, and I could see that the world would be better because of it.

I realized, in that moment, that I had begun to enjoy Bella's company, despite the discomfort it caused. She was a good person, and I found myself wanting to know even more about her. This fact, however, made me even more uncomfortable than the scent of her blood. I had not forgotten that Bella was a human, one with especially tantalizing blood, no less, which made my growing desire for her company an impossible dream.

It was then, in my moments of musing and silently scolding myself for doing so, that the disaster began.

Bella was reaching for her telephone, which sat in the middle of the table, presumably to check the time, and was bumped from behind by a young man who was clearing tables. He hit her hard enough to jostle her quite severely, and the glass containing her juice was knocked to the floor, shattering over the tiles.

Time, for that moment, froze, I am sure. Bella, in her embarrassment over the stares from the rest of the cafeteria's patrons, immediately dropped to the floor to clean up the mess. The blush that colored her cheeks enticed me to join her, to extinguish the fire in my throat with the blood that filed her veins, but I held still, protecting her with my sheer willpower for a few extra seconds until the blush calmed. Being a gentleman, I couldn't bear to allow her to do this work on her own, so when I saw that her face was once again the milky white that was her usual complexion, I joined her on the floor.

We faced each other, both of us on our knees, and picked up the tiny shards of glass that littered the floor, placing them on her plate. We were entirely too close to each other for me to be prepared for what happened next.

Preoccupied with the bits of broken glass that I was removing from the floor, I did not notice as Bella picked up a particularly ragged shard. I did, however, notice immediately, my head whipping around to face her, venom already dripping from my lower lip, when said shard pierced the flesh of her index finger.

I would like to say that my willpower held. It did not. I had enough trouble resisting her when we were in the same room, but now? Now, as I watched a single droplet of that crimson ambrosia seem from the tear in her skin, it was impossible.

I stared at it for a moment, as she pinched the finger between the thumb and index of her other hand, causing the droplet of blood to grow even larger, barely realizing that I was licking my lips in anticipation. My throat burned ravenously, and I could feel my muscles, acting without my permission, tensing, readying my body to pounce on my prey.

Time passed, I believe, though I could never say how much, as I stared at that blood, willing myself to resist as I scooted closer to her. When I was finally close enough to reach the young woman, my hand shot out, grabbing her by the wrist and pulling her injury closer to my face. I'm sure she assumed I was just trying to get a closer look. I wasn't. I had seen enough. It was finally time for a taste.

I locked my eyes with hers, watching as they registered shock and confusion as my lips came down around her finger, holding it gently between my teeth, the flat center of my tongue pressing against the injured flesh, letting the blood spread out over my taste buds.

Heaven.

My eyes closed, the pleasure of the blood raising a purr from deep in my chest. I sucked gently on her finger, caressing the wound with my tongue as I tried to pull out just a little bit more of the most delicious flavor to have ever crossed my lips from the wound before my venom caused it to seal.

I didn't swallow, instead letting the blood linger on my tongue, savoring the taste, my mind a whirlwind of ecstasy. I heard a low moan escape my lips without making a conscious decision to make such a sound.

I cannot say how long I sat there, swirling my blood-coated tongue around Bella's finger, enjoying the taste of her flesh nearly as much as I had her blood, before the scent of her arousal brought my attention back to the cafeteria, and to the fact that I was sucking on a young woman's bloodied finger in the middle of it with a distinct tightening occurring around the zipper of my slacks. As my eyes began to regain focus, I pulled her hand away from my mouth, letting go of her wrist as I laid her hand on the top of her leg.

Feeling panicked as I met her gaze, seeing the utter confusion in her expression, I swallowed the blood and venom that still pooled in my mouth, and spoke in a low whisper. "Forgive my crass behavior. That was entirely inappropriate." I paused for a moment, trying to find a way out of the hole that I had just dug for myself. "If you'll excuse me, Bella," I continued, "I have a surgery in a bit, and I need to report to the scrub room immediately. Good afternoon."

I stood quickly and was gone from the cafeteria before Bella had a chance to respond.

I left the hospital that afternoon, stopping only at my office to collect my keys and leave a quick note for the chief of surgery, citing a family emergency that required me to leave town immediately and a promise to return the following week. After my behavior in the cafeteria, I wasn't actually sure that returning to the hospital was a possibility. I made the decision as I sat down in my Mercedes in the hospital's parking garage to have a family meeting when I returned home after my hunt, knowing that Alice would See and gather everyone for me.

I drove my car east, out of the city, traveling for just under an hour until I left the interstate and parked my car just off of the road near the forest. Stepping out of the car, I walked slowly into the trees, then inhaled.

I could smell several options for prey in the surrounding area, but none of them smelled like freesias, which, to my great displeasure, was a disappointment to me. I could still taste Bella's blood on my tongue, the flavor had been so intensely perfect for me – nothing had ever tasted so good in all my centuries. But it was imperative that I stop thinking of her blood, stop thinking of returning to the city to find her and let my sharp teeth cut through the thin, milky white flesh on her neck and savor every last drop that I had missed.

I shook my head, hard, trying desperately to clear my mind. I inhaled again, deeper this time, determined to find something acceptable to sate my need for blood. In the east, I caught the scent of a herd of deer, and wrinkled my nose in disgust. I turned to the west: a brown bear, perhaps two. They held no appeal to me whatsoever.

Sighing, I began to run to the south, following the scent of a lynx, the most appealing of the options that I had, but still quite a disappointment. Lynx had always been a favorite of mine, and I worried that I would never again be satisfied with anything now that I had tasted the most perfect blood on earth.

I caught up quickly with the wild cat, pouncing upon its back and easily wrestling it to the ground, piercing through its vein without a thought. I silently cursed Bella and everyone and everything that had brought her into my life with each swallow of the animal's blood, until it was completely drained. I shoved the carcass away from me, and stayed on my knees, placing my face in my hands and silently praying to god, begging him over and over to forgive me for what I had done that afternoon and to give me the strength to resist in the future.

I was still in that position some time later, when Jasper jogged into the small clearing and sat down beside me. I felt the warmth of his hand on my back as he gently patted me.

"Come on, Carlisle. Alice says everything is gonna be alright. You gotta come home now, and talk to us. Even Edward came back. Alice said you would need everyone."

I looked up at him, my vision slightly blurred by the venom that had pooled in my eyes, making them burn with the tears that refused to fall, and nodded my head slowly.

"Yes, Jasper, let us go. I think there is much that needs to be said."

The conversation at my house that evening was quite enlightening, and I must say that, while it was a great relief to bear my soul to my family, I was entirely unprepared for what I learned from them.

As I recounted to them the entirety of my encounters with Bella, all the way back to the beginning, I was met with nods and smiles from each of the boys, a reaction which confused me more than anything. I was forced to stop the story early, however, at the point in which Bella's finger was first cut, when I was distracted by the sound of leather ripping. I looked up toward the sound and found Jasper sitting in the couch with darkened eyes, his entire body tense, fists gripping the shredded cover of the couch, venom dripping from his chin. Emmett and Alice were on either side of him, gently soothing him.

"What's going on?" I asked, completely confused.

"Carlisle," Edward began, his voice edgy. "Could you please think of anything else besides Bella, please? Perhaps shopping for shoes, or sitting in your clearing?"

I did as he asked, picturing a starry night, lying on my back in the clearing, enjoying the scent of the wildflowers and cedars. I did this until I heard several sighs of relief, then I opened my eyes and looked around the room, finding everyone once again relaxed.

"What in the hell was that about?" I demanded.

"That, my dear Carlisle, was your memory affecting us," Edward explained. "Jasper was feeling your thirst as you remembered it. He was barely remaining in his seat. I could smell the girl, just as you could, through your thoughts. I wanted to run out in search of her. However did you stand it, Carlisle?"

I shook my head. "It was nearly impossible. Today was worse, when her blood was spilled..." I hung my head, ashamed. "I tasted her."

"Carlisle, stop that, damn it," Emmett scolded, scowling at me. "Don't you get what happened? Jasper let me feel the thirst you felt... Remember the woman in Virginia? Or the one in Wyoming? The only two humans I ever fed from? It was the same, Carlisle. Exactly the same."

I looked up, shocked, and then let my eyes meet those of each member of my family, all of whom were nodding in agreement with Emmett. My mouth gaped open a little bit, as the realization hit me. I instantly remembered the conversation I had had with Aro after Emmett's slip, when he had explained to us the concept of the "singer" - the human whose blood is a siren song to one specific vampire, whose blood was made just for him, and therefore irresistible. Never before, not in three centuries, had I been so affected by the blood of a human. Emmett was right. Bella was my singer.