Disclaimer- I didn't own Twilight, I don't own Twilight, and I won't own Twilight… anytime soon…

Disclaimer- I didn't own Twilight, I don't own Twilight, and I won't own Twilight… anytime soon….

Stephenie Meyer: What?

Me: What? Asks innocently

SM: I thought you said something…

Me: No…

SM: okay…

Me: walks away quickly

Edward is sitting in his room looking at his CD's. Bella is on a shopping trip with Alice.

Edward- YESSSSS!! Bella didn't find my Janet Jackson CD.

Henryy Pottah comes out of Edward's closet, holding a pen out in front of him.

Edward- Henryy?! What the Carlisle were you doing in my closet?!

Henryy- Just video taping you. Bella's orders.

Edward- What?! You, a wizard, takes orders from a human?!

Henryy- UH!! I am NOT a wizard right now!! I am a follower of the great Isabella, leader of all things clumsy and werewolf like.

Edward- WEREWOLF LIKE?! What about VAMPIRE like?!

Henryy- She said something about Jacob having the whole package.

Edward- starts to laugh maniacally

Henryy- Okay. I am OUTTA hea!!

Edward- JA gasp SP gasp ER!! Gasp, gasp, gasp, gasp, gasp.

Henryy- Yo, Dawg. That's enuff gasps, foo!!

Jasper comes into room, smiling evilly.

Jasper- What?? So now your all gangster?

Henryy- No.

Edward- But you were just talking like a gangster.

Henryy- No I wasn't, you guys are just imagining things.

Edward- Okayyyy.

Jasper- I'm leaving now.

Henryy- Yeah. Me too. Edward is such a party pooper!! GOSH!!

Edward- What did I do?!

Jasper- What didn't you do? GOSH!! Let's blow this Popsicle stand.

Henryy- Okay.

Jasper and Henryy go into Edward's closet.

Edward- Why do people keep going into my closet?!

Jasper- It's not JUST a closet Edward!! It's a magical portal to the next world!!

Edward- OH!! What's the next world?!

Henryy-… Bella's closet…

Edward- roars in fury how long have you guys been using my closet to get to Bella's room?!

Jasper- Actually, this is our first time. Jacob Black showed us how to use it.

Henryy- OH!! It also takes you to a place called Hogwarts.

Jasper- OHHHH!! You mean Logdarts!!

Henryy-…no… I mean Hogwarts…

Jasper- Eh, whatever.

Edward- Well!! Let's go to Hogwarts!!

Henryy- Why not Bella's closet, mate? I mean, you guys arein loooovvveee (says in mocking tone)

Edward- Okay first of all; weird. Secondly; I've always wanted to go to Hogwarts!!

Jasper- Do you even know what Hogwarts is?!

Edward- … No…

Jasper- Ugh. So typical. Men.

Henryy- Okay. First of all; you don't know what Hogwarts is either.

Jasper- looks down embarrassed

Henryy- Secondly; you can't say men in that tone, because you're a man too. And last, but most definitely not least, third; Edward is not just a man. He's a God. A Greek God, to be exact.

Random Fan Girls- whistles and shouts WHOOOO!! YESSSS!!

Jasper- HEY!! I'm a Greek God too!!

RFG- Yeah, but Edward is hotter than you. We're sorry Jazz. Some how the RFG all knew what they were going to say, and said it at the same time.

Jasper- cries while on knees, reaching arms to the sky. WHYYYYYYY?!

Henryy- OKAAAAYYYYYY. Helps Jasper up. You guys must be banished. So sorry… Points wand at RFG BANISHAMIRO!! (A/N: I made that up… lol…)

RFG are still standing there with puzzled expressions, when a girl poofs out of nowhere with purple smoke.

Girl- Ello. Blimey. Where the ell am I??

Henryy- HER- MEANIE!!

Girl, supposedly Her-Meanie- Henryy?? Henryy Pottah? Where are we??

Henryy- You won't believe it if I tell you…

Her- Meanie- Try me.

Henryy- shudders and mumbles under breathe: I've been there before, and I DON'T want to go back. Shudders again.

Her-Meanie doesn't seem to notice, but of course with Edward and Jasper's extreme hearing, they start to snicker.

Her- Meanie- What are you laughing at??

Edward- turns around to look at Her- Meanie. What? Oh… Um… Nothing?

Her- Meanie- is now dazzled

Jasper- Let me walk you to the closet Her- Meanie…

Jasper takes Her- Meanie's hand. She is now re-dazzleded. He leads her into the closet. Edward and Henryy watch them go into the closet and hear:

Jasper- What the- HEYY!! Don't touch me !#!! LET GO!!

Her- Meanie- growls…

Jasper- What the eff!! Did you just growl at me?!

Her- Meanie- I KNOW WHAT YOU ARE!!

Jasper- screams like a girl. What is that?!

Her- Meanie- My vampdar!!

Jasper- And what the ell is a Vampdar?!

Her- Meanie- A Vampire Radar. GET OVER HERE!!

A ripping sound is heard.

Jasper- screams like a girl again. Alice is going to kill me!! … well you, BUT THAT"S NOT THE POINT!! This was my best designer shirt!! OHHHHHHHH… YOU ARE GOING TO DIE !#!!

Her- Meanie- screams like a guy… I know… creepy…

Jasper steps out of the closet.

Henryy and Edward- …

Jasper- I wouldn't go in there if I were you.

There is a puff of purple smoke. Jasper looks back into the closet.

Jasper- Oh, good. She's gone… so is the blood… I MEAN BOOK!! Laughs nervously.

Henryy- Eets Oh- keey. She was annoee ing anee wayeees.

Edward- Why are you talking like Fleur?!

Henryy- Who the ell ees deeeseeee Fleurrrrr?!

Edward- The one that talks like Deeseee.

Henryy- Ohhhh. You mean Flour?!

Edward- YEAH!!

Henryy- She has been teaching me some French says 'French' with a French accent.

Jasper- Okay. Well, stop. You're failing miserably.

Henryy- Okay… looks sad.

RFG- says to reader of this story. We know. You forgot about us. We're sneaky like that. Anyways; AWWWWWWWW!! Talks to readers again. We're saying 'AWW' about Henryy being sad.

Jasper- looks annoyed Will you guys just go away?!

RFG- NO!

Jasper- Did you guys happen to see Her- Meanie… fall…??

RFG- NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!! All look scared.

Henryy- Okay, since my last spell didn't work, I will just have to kill you.

RFG- Oh. This should be good since you're not even a real wizard. Just a poor excuse for Harry Potter. The greatest wizard who ever lived, and defeated Voldemort!!

Henryy- Voldemort?! OHH…. You mean Voldey- Mart!! And, who the ell is Harry Potter?! And I am a real wizard. Just ask Bumblewhore. (A/N: Dumbledore, and I know… that's why this is rated T…)

Henryy points his wand at the RFG again

Henryy- Padava Ledavra!!

All RFG's fall down dead.

Henryy, Edward, and Jasper- YESSSS!! They all high five each other, and then step into the closet.

Henryy- TO HOGWARTS!!

REVIEW!! They make me happy… smiles. I need ideas!!