It seemed as if the whole precinct was gathered in her apartment. She had the distinct feeling that the low whispers and quick glances in her direction were an indication that something was going on behind her back between her fellow detectives. It wasn't a feeling she particularly liked especially since it seemed as though Elliot was privy to information she wasn't.
The private conversations being held on her behalf had been going on for some time and she wanted answers. Elliot was the first to approach and he leaned over her shoulder and whispered in her ear in a brusque tone, "Captain wants to see you."
Her curiosity was beginning to heighten as she and Elliot stood side by side to face their boss. His grim expression only made her more uneasy. "Olivia," he began. "I think you should take a seat."
"I'm fine standing," she protested. "Just tell me whatever you have to tell me."
"Sit down, Olivia." he demanded in a stern tone. She knew then by the sound of Cragen's voice it was best not to argue and she took a seat on her couch, looking up expectantly at her partner and her boss.
"Richard White is out," Cragen told her. "He escaped from prison."
"So we'll find him and put him back in," she replied.
"It's not that simple, Olivia," Elliot said. "He left behind some pretty explicit diary entries and artwork when he decided to break out."
Olivia frowned. "Was there someone he was focusing on particularly? Someone we should put police protection on?"
They were silent for moments and exchanged a look between the two that didn't bode well before Elliot finally spoke. "He's focusing on you."
"So the note was from him?"
"We have reason to believe so," Cragen answered. "Which means from here on out, it's vacation for you with a twenty-four hour detail."
Olivia's head shot up and she looked hastily between the two men. "I can take care of myself."
Elliot shook his head vigorously, countering her stubbornness with a remark of his own. "Just because you're a cop doesn't mean that you'll be safe," Elliot said. "The last time you encountered him he put a knife to your throat. Do you really think he won't try it again, or worse?"
She knew it was a rhetorical question, that he was just testing her to see how far she would go to take matters into her own hands and all her opposition couldn't match the truth to his words. But it didn't matter in the slightest because she was Olivia Benson. "I don't need a detail or your concerns. I can take care of myself."
Elliot's tempered flared as he watched her become the Olivia Benson he was accustomed to seeing; the one who ran and hid when she didn't want to face her fears. His anger was beginning to surface but he shouldn't have been surprised. She would immediately deny she needed any help from him and that she could fend for herself. She would try to act tough when it was really eating her up inside. And she would make up another clever excuse so that she didn't have to confront the emotions she was currently grappling with.
Typical Olivia.
But the level of stubbornness he possessedclearly equated hers and he was in no position to let this be left unfinished. He excused himself, telling his boss he could be on his way and that he'd sort things out with Olivia himself, and went after his partner, finding her pacing in her bedroom.
"I know what you're going to say," she declared with eyes that burned with outrage. "You're my detail."
"It's for your own good, Olivia."
"You went behind my back!" she snapped. "I gave that note to you in confidence, Elliot. Not so that you could run off to Cragen and have him hire a babysitter for me just because he's worried I'll get a little banged up."
"That's an understatement and you know it," Elliot fired back. "He will kill you!"
Olivia ran her fingers through her hair in an attempt to calm herself. It didn't work and the shaky sigh she let out only made her more anxious. "I can take care of myself."
"Would you stop saying that?" he growled. "Stop telling me you're strong enough that you don't need me, Olivia."
"Oh, so that's what this about? Your need to prove to yourself that someone still wants you," she seethed, only inches away from Elliot now. "Because everyone else has left. Kathy, Blaine, Dani and you're last chance is me to debunk the theory of everyone abandoning you. Well, I'm sorry, Saint Stabler but I'm not your next toy to play with for awhile and then break it and toss it aside until you find a better one. We've already played that game."
"That's a low blow, Olivia," he managed to choke out, his boiling blood almost making him spit out words he would regret.
He could see the hate in her eyes. The physical disdain she had for him at that very moment burned a hole through his heart as he took a step back to inhale some much needed air. He didn't know when exactly they had stopped being just partners, but he could see the impact their proximity had on their ability to simply get along. The irony of their inability to make peace because of their closeness almost made him want to laugh.
"We are Manhattan SVU's biggest assets," she said softly, her hostile manner giving way to raw emotions. "Without me, you can't function as a police officer."
"Is that why you think I'm here?" he asked, eyebrows dipping in confusion.
"Why else would you volunteer to be my detail unless there was some personal gain behind it, the reason this time being job security on your part since without me you seem to get in trouble that could have you handing in your badge?"
"I'm not here protecting the police department's property, Olivia," he said slowly for emphasis, blue eyes interrogating brown. "I'm here to protect you."
When she didn't respond, he went on. "Look, if you what you want is a standby officer to be your vigilante, then fine by me. But I refuse to believe that you're trying to push me away because you think you can take care of yourself," he said. "But let me ask you this; do you feel safe when I'm not here?"
She took her bottom lip between her teeth and remained focused on the carpeting below her. "Elliot - "
"You can't answer me, can you?" he questioned in a frustrated tone. "Jesus, Olivia. I understand that all these years you've had to take care of yourself because no one else was there for you. But for once in your goddamned life, let someone else take care of you."
"I don't want you to be my detail, Elliot," she said. "I can't put you in harm's way just because some serial killer is after me."
"If he's after you, he's after me. We're partners, Olivia."
"That's just it!" she exclaimed. "Richard White knows how to get to me. He tries to hurt the people I care about and you... you're the top of that list, Elliot."
He fought back the urge to smile at her last statement. Now we're getting somewhere. "Why don't you let me be the judge?"
"I just don't want something to happen to you, Elliot," she said, inching closer to his broad frame. "I can't lose you; you're all I have left."
Her admission made him him realize there might still be hope to repair their damaged partnership. And maybe what they really had needed was just to fight. To let the truth they had been harboring for so long set them free.
"You're not going to lose me, Olivia," he said as he pulled her into an embrace that pushed the boundaries but comforted her nonetheless. "I promise."
Elliot had always been a man of his word. He vowed that this time would be no different.
