To your releive or dissapointment there will be no 'Real' scenario or any 'glee' scenario in this chapter, but there will be some new scenarios that you may or may not like

There Can Be Only One!

Robert Mercer, AKA Bobert, AKA good Bobert

Vs

Adam Wesker, AKA Sarge, Aka Evil Bobert, Aka Artie, Aka Wesker II

Part 3: PEELZ and TEAMKILLZ

Scenario 1: left 4 dead 2

Four people stood at a carnival, they were among the last remaining humans on earth…and they liked it. Among them were two familiar faces, Adam Wesker and Bobert Mercer. There were also two southerners named Coach and Rochelle. Coach spoke first.

"Rochelle, I…am your father!" He said

"That's not true, that's impossible!"

"Why?"

"Cause you're my brother." Explained Rochelle

"We're southerners, I can be your brother AND your Father!"

""

Mercer shook his head, "Now that was just one big stereotype…"

"So, what're your names," asked Coach, "My friend's call me Coach!"

Rochelle's eyes went wide, "Coach?" She said in disbelief, "YOU'RE MY BROTHER...or was it my Daddy…"

"Dumbshits…" said Adam

"My name's Bobert, Bobert Mercer." Said Bobert

"Mercer?" said Adam, "Mercer…"

"Adam…"

"PEELZ!" yelled Louis

They all stared at the man who suddenly blushed with embarrassment.

"I'll just be going back to Left 4 Dead 1 now." Said Louis before he ran off

"Continuing…" said Adam, "DIE BOBERT!"

"What….TANK, TANK….TTTAAANNNNKK!" screamed Bobert, making everyone turn to look for the giant zombie

They stopped when they saw a propane tank lying on the ground.

"God damnit, he tricked me!" yelled Adam

"SHOOT IT, SHOOT IT SHOOT IT!" yelled Rochelle

Then Bill from Left 4 dead 1 appeared

"Ha, you are an idiot!" said Bill while he poked Rochelle on the forehead

"MERCER!" Cried Adam with anger in his voice

"I AIN'T DYING THIS TIME!" yelled Bobert as he ran quickly towards the safe room

"GRRRRRRRRRRRR"

Adam looked around for a weapon of some kind; these zombie games usually have a bunch of ridiculously beefed up weapons, right?

He looked and found a crowbar.

"God damned melee weapons!" complained Adam before her charged after Mercer

Back with the southern idiots, Rochelle had calmed down from the "tank" attack and turned to her brother/father, Coach.

"Daddy, you should lose some weight."

"Excuse me, oh EXCUSE ME!" said Coach before he shot Rochelle in the arm

"OW"

Then a huge zombie with one big arm charged at Coach and started pounding him into the ground.

"Now that's what I call a karma charger!" said Rochelle as she walked away

Then a Jockey jumped onto her head and started making her walk into fire.

"Mercer!" yelled Adam as he climbed up a rollercoaster after Bobert

"AHAHHAHAA" yelled Bobert as he rode the coaster towards Adam

"OH SHIT!" yelled Adam as the coaster drove over his fingers

Adam fell 300 feet to the bottom of the coaster.

"PHEW, good thing I'm indestructible." Said Adam with complete seriousness

Then Bobert threw a garden gnome off the coaster and it crushed Adam's head.

"Gnome chompski…why…"

Scenario 2: Seamus Gump

Seamus Ward sat on a bench in a public park; he was short with pale skin, a face-full of acne and a ponytail. Bobert sat down next to him.

"What's wrong Seamus?" he asked

"I've lost mah shoes." Explained Seamus with a southern drawl similar to Forest Gump

"Your shoes?" asked Bobert

"Yeah, Mommy said they'd take me anywhere!" Seamus looked at his bare feet, and then at Bobert's shoes, "I bet those are some comfortable shoes!"

"Why, yes, they are." Bobert thought for a second, "how about I lend you my shoes, at least until you can buy some new ones."

"Why, that would be mighty fine o' you Mr. Mercer!" Exclaimed Seamus

"Well then, I'll just…"

"INCOMING!" yelled Adam as he jumped from the top of the building the bench was leaning against

"WTF?" screamed Bobert as Adam collided with him, the two rolled down the street and Adam jumped off, then Seamus drove over Bobert in a pickup truck.

"Good work Seamus." Praised Adam

Seamus walked over to Bobert's corpse and took his shoes off.

"What, I deserve a reward don't I?"

"Fine"

"YIPPE!"

Scenario 3: Star Wars

"Use the force, Luke." Said Ben to Luke/Bobert's mind

"Hey shut up old man, you're not broadcasting on a private channel you know!" Said Adam/Vader as he flew after Luke/Bobert

"I'm not sure what you mean." Explained Ben

"I can hear you too!" said Adam/Vader, "AND YOU ARE REALLY LOUD!"

"Oh, I'm sorry; I'll lower my frequency volume."

"What, that won't do anything!"

"Oh."

"You need a premium force package to use a private channel!"

"Oh and how much does that cost?"

"50,000 credits."

"Oh, WOW that's a lot of money for a dead man to have."

"Yeah well you better make that money appear soon because I'm sick of hearing you talking to Bobert all the time."

"Y-you mean that this isn't the first time?"

"OF COURSE NOT," Yelled Vader/Adam, "RIGHT AFTER I KILL YOU, YA KNOW WHAT I HEAR?"

"Ummm, no."

"I hear '"RUN LUKE, RUN"' do you know how annoying it is to hear the man I JUST killed giving advice!"

"Well, I'm terribly sorry about all of this, I'll just stop giving advice now."

"THANK YOU!"

"Btw Vader, he just blew up the death star."

"FUCK!"

Scenario 4: BLOOPERS!

XD, I lied; no bloopers!

But I do have…a revelation for you…

RED VS. BLUE: REVELATION!

"Hey Adam, you ever wonder why we are here?" asked Simmons

"Yeah I know right, to think that humans were created from an accidental mix of certain minerals at just the right time!" answered Adam

"No, I mean why we are HERE, as in at this base in this box canyon."

"Oh…yeah I wonder about that too."

"Mmhmm."

"Yup."

"Yeah…"

At blue base!

"Hey Bobert, you ever wonder when that freelancer we ordered will get here?" Asked Church

"No, I just got here to replace your old commander."

"But, I'M the commander!"

"No, you killed the old commander and took his armor."

"Oh yeah….am I going to go to jail for that?"

"Probably."

"So anyway, this is Sarge, our commander and chief!" Explained Simmons

Grif walked in, "Yeah, our commander and chief that hasn't made an attack in 3 years."

"Shut up Grif." Said Sarge, "Welcome new soldier, now that we have you we can finally make an attack!"

"Why me?"

"Because, you are Adam Wesker, right?"

"That's my name, but what is special about me?"

Sarge moved closer to Adam, "Your half brother is on blue team."

"Bobert!" exclaimed Adam, "Mercer…."

"We attack at dawn!" yelled Sarge

"Can't we just attack now?" Complained Grif

"Fine, here is the plan."

"The plan you've been working on for three years?" asked Grif, "This'll be good."

Sarge laid out a map of the canyon, "We will run, in single file at the blue base and victory will be ours!"

"THAT'S it, THAT'S your plan?" Asked Adam

"Pretty much…three years of planning will come into effect soon…TO THE WARTHOG!"

Blue base

"Hey, what's that sound?" asked Tucker

"To me it sounds like…the red team making an attack!" exclaimed Caboose

"Caboose, you think that me taking a shower is the reds attacking." Explained Church

"That shower head looked suspicious…I think it was a camera."

"So you think that the reds are watching us taking showers?" asked Tucker

"…."

"Good job caboose."

Bobert looked at the field with a sniper, "LOOK, CABOOSE WAS RIGHT, IT'S THE REDS!"

Blue team looked at the field and saw Sarge, Simmons and Donut in the warthog…and Grif running alongside.

"DAMNIT SARGE, YOU KNOW I HAVE NO CARDIO POWER!"

"Exactly why you must run!" explained Sarge

"Whatever happened to that Wesker guy?" asked Donut

"He said something about winning the war for us…I think he deserted."

Church turned frantically to Caboose, "GET IN THE TANK, SHOOT THEM, AND DON'T KILL ME THIS TIME!"

"Okai."

Caboose jumped into the scorpion tank named Shelia, "Let's do this Shelia, wait…five pedals…that's new."

The tank drove towards the reds and shot Grif, who then flew through the air back to red base.

"Damnit, I intended for him to be killed." Complained Sarge

"What was that sir?"

"Nothing."

The tank suddenly turned around and fired at blue base, the shot went through the teleportation device and came back to hit the tank. Caboose crawled out, "Sorry guys, wrong pedal…"

"Oh shit, oh shit, OH SHIT!" Screamed Tucker as the warthog open fired on them, Church attempted to snipe them, but he missed every shot…as usual.

"Don't worry guys, I got this." Said Bobert

He jumped out of the base and fired at the warthog, killing Donut; who was manning the turret.

"DONUT, NO!" yelled Simmons

Bobert fired again, hitting the tires; the jeep did a 360 in the air and landed in blue base.

Bobert threw a plasma grenade, hitting Simmons, Simmons noticed the grenade, and ran towards Sarge for help which successfully blew them both up.

"YEAH BOBERT!" cheered the rest of blue team, "now we just have to deal with Grif…"

Then a drop ship appeared, "Yeah, reinforcements!" cheered Tucker, "why are they coming in so fast?"

The massive drop ship crashed into blue base, completely obliterating it and killing all of blue team except Bobert, who was just outside the base.

Bobert was thrown to the ground from the blast, "What, who was the idiot that gave the pilot alcohol?"

Then Adam leapt out of the ship, holding a minigun, "Been a long time, Mercer…"

TOO BE CONTINUED?

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