Disclaimer : All character in this story are owned by Hajima Isayama.
With Jean
All around, as far as the eyes could see, there was only death. Large humanoid creatures grabbing human beings as if they are mere dolls and devouring them without any remorse or any sign of stopping.
All of his friends, Reiner, Bertholdt, Connie, Sasha, Armin already dead. He himself was extremely exhausted and couldn't go on much longer. There in front of him stood 3 titans, all over 10 meters with creepy smiles and large teeth that had blood on them. Blood of his comrades.
He could do nothing but stand there as the they closed in on him. There was a black and red blur and suddenly, the titan on the right fell forward, its nape cut clean off. The other 2 titans, seeing this, lost interest in him and tried to find the human that killed one of their kind.
And then Jean finally saw what had caused the death of the titan on the right. It was none other than Mikasa Ackerman, the strongest to graduate from their batch and the second strongest soldier of humanity.
" No MIKASA!" shouted Jean, fearing for her safety "What are you doing ? get out of here. Don't be stupid."
She either didn't hear him or completely ignored him and continued her assault on the remaining titans.
The titan in the middle tried to grab her but she shot her cable towards the titan's knee and evaded it. With a smooth mid air summersault she fired her cable towards the titan's nape and within a second the second titan fell. She let her guard down for a second and that is all it took for the last remaining titan to grab her.
She tried to struggle against the behemoth's grasp but it was useless. Jean stood there with horror stricken face, unable to do anything as the titan was about to devour the woman that he cared for most in the world. Just as the titan was going to devour her, she looked at him and their eyes met for a second, and all Jean saw in her eyes was disappointment and acceptance.
The titan brought Mikasa body up to its mouth and bit down
Jean screamed as he woke up from one of the worst nightmares he ever had. He looked around and saw that he didn't wake anyone, which was a relief. He brought up his hands to rub the sleep from his eyes but noticed that his eyes and cheeks were wet.
He was crying.
He saw that it was still early and sun will not rise for the next hour. But he doesn't think that he can go back to sleep again. This particular nightmare shook him to the core.
"Why am I so pathetic ?" he cursed himself mentally.
When he reflects back on his life, he can say that he has never done anything worthwhile in his life. He kept dreaming about the interior and how good his life will be once he gets there. He didn't care about his training or being the best. Only thought that remained in his mind was being in the top 10. It didn't matter if he was ranked ten or number one.
Such pathetic ambitions. Maybe this is the reason that even though his 3DM maneuvering skills were on par if not better than Mikasa, he still ranked sixth. Even below that suicidal maniac. He didn't try to improve his technique or strength. He didn't give sufficient time to training to hone his instincts.
Maybe if he had given his all during those three years under Shadis, he may have ranked second, or who knows first and could've been more helpful in Trost. Maybe less lives would've been lost if he himself had fought the titans head on instead of entirely depending on Mikasa.
Marco said that he was a natural leader. But who would want to follow a weak leader. A leader who has only slain 2 titans in his life, those two also with help of someone else or by pure luck. Hell, he himself wouldn't follow such a pathetic leader.
He has to do something about his weaknesses. Of course, he wouldn't become as strong as Mikasa overnight, but he at least had to start somewhere. He had seen the survey corps in action, especially captain Levi, the way he slew those two titans who were going to attack Eren, Armin and Mikasa.
He was literally like a storm, killing titans as if cutting through grass.
The scouts have inspired him tremendously and he will do his best to stand on equal footing with them and someday even surpass 'Humanity's strongest soldier'. But first things first, today is the day when the new recruits will be assigned to the military branch of their choice. Of course, only top 10 would be given the option to choose MP, but choosing to be in the interior is the farthest thing from his mind right now.
He got up and went to outside to get some fresh air. All that thinking is really stressing him out and maybe a peaceful walk is just what he needs to clear his head. He welcomed the cool morning breeze brushing against his skin.
He was walking around the square when he saw a lone figure sitting on a bench near a fountain. The person had black hair and was wearing a pink sweater, but what caught his attention was the red scarf that was tied around her neck. It was a dead giveaway.
He walked towards her and once he reached there he sat on the bench beside her, with a good amount of distance between them. He didn't want to intrude in her personal space, also, he didn't know how to approach her. Jean wanted to say something but the words just weren't escaping his usually loud mouth.
She seemed to be in deep thought, she didn't even notice his arrival
"Hey." Jean finally said. "Well at least I didn't embarrass myself by saying something completely stupid."
His voice broke her out of her day dream and looked towards him with those calm grey eyes. Eyes which had the power to enchant him with just a single glance. Jean looked away in embarrassment, his cheeks flushed a little. He was praying to whatever gods were up there that she wouldn't notice.
"Hey." she replied, noticing the redness that had crept up to his cheeks. It amused her, but she didn't voice it out.
"What are you doing here so early ?" He asked. It was only 05:30 AM in the morning. Their chores won't start until seven.
"Nothing. Just thinking about recent events." she said in her signature emotionless voice. But Jean could guess the reason for her restlessness. Although they had won the trial, they would still not be able to see Yeager as he is assigned with captain Levi's squad right now and is under strict orders to remain in whatever location they are currently residing.
"You're sad because you can't see the suicidal blockhead, aren't you ?" Jean asked in a sad yet understanding tone.
Her eyes widened at how accurately he was able to read her. She didn't say anything further and her silence was all the answer he needed. A pang of jealousy shot through him. He would gladly give up his life just to have all that care directed towards him. Yeager had no idea how lucky he is to have such a wonderful person look after him.
They fell into a comfortable silence. Jean didn't want to say anything further because it will only prove how hopeless he is when it comes to the raven haired beauty sitting beside him.
"Thank you." her voice broke the silence. Jean looked at her with a confused gaze, not understanding the reason for her gratitude.
"For what ?" He asked.
"Yesterday in the trial. You stood up to defend Eren and also stopped me from jumping over and making an impulsive mistake. Because of you Eren was able to live." She explained. This took Jean by surprise. He was not expecting gratitude for his actions yesterday since he was only looking out for a friend ,and no matter his personal feelings, he would never let any of his comrades die if he has the power to save them.
"No need to thank me for that. I admit I am not a big fan of Yeager," said Jean " but that doesn't mean that I would let him die. All our friends from 104th are important and I won't let anything happen to them if I can do something about it."
He saw Mikasa's lips turn up slightly and it was one of the most beautiful sights that Jean had seen in his life. It was not a complete smile, but in his books it was progress. Although progress towards what ? he will never know.
"As for restraining you, I knew that what captain Levi did was brutal," he continued "But it was the reason why Eren was pardoned."
"He will pay for what he did with Eren" A dark shadow fell over Mikasa's face. He felt stupid for bringing up that even. Just few moments back, she was looking so angelic with a little smile on her beautiful face but he just had to ruin that perfect moment.
"I really am an idiot" he mentally sighed.
"Today is the day of assignment. I don't think I need to ask which branch Armin and you will join." He changed the topic. He finally saw the dark look slowly fade away.
"Never bring up that topic up again, Kirstein" he thought
"Armin and I will join the scouts," she said "What about you ?"
"The scouts for me as well." he replied. This surprised raven haired girl. Wasn't this the guy that kept getting into fights with Eren, just because of Eren's desire to join the scouts, calling him stupid and a suicidal maniac. The Jean she knew would join the MP without any second thought.
Jean saw the confused expression on her face.
"A lot has happened in the last couple of days. I had heard stories of the carnage that the titans could inflict, but seeing it firsthand is another experience altogether. Also, Marco died in liberating Trost," his voice wavered a little. Mikasa's eyes widened. She didn't know about their friend's demise.
"I saw his body when I was walking through Trost, half eaten with a scared expression on his face. He died alone and no one knows what happened to him."
Although in the last two days he was coming to accept his best friends' death. But saying it out aloud in front of someone else has again re-opened the wound that he was trying so desperately to bury. He didn't notice but his fists were clenched and he had drawn blood from his right hand. He felt a soft hand on his right hand. He took his eyes up and saw that it was hers.
Her expression didn't change much but he could see the sadness in her eyes. She could not understand his pain but wanted to support him. The man in front of her was not the annoying brat that she had come to know in her years of military training. He was no longer the self centered boy whose only aim in life was to survive and live his life comfortably, everyone else be damned. The person in front of her had seen the destruction caused by war and lost people close to him.
The experience of Trost, although horrid, has done good for the brown haired boy. No, man. He took the lead when it mattered and most of their friends are alive because of him. He grew up in a couple of days more than he grew up in the last 3 years of training.
They sat in silence, both mourning their fallen friend. They saw that sun almost completely up. Time was 06:30 AM, they didn't realize but they have been sitting there for an hour. Both feeling lighter than when they arrived.
Soldiers were waking up and life started bustling around the barracks. They also had to carry out their morning routine and duties but both of them were reluctant to leave the comfortable space that they had developed for themselves.
"It's time to go," it was surprisingly Jean who broke the silence. Mikasa didn't say anything, just nodded and both got up "So, uh..." Jean was standing there awkwardly, not knowing what to do or say. This was the first time he spent such a long time with Mikasa, without something interrupting them.
"I'll uh... see you around ?" spoke Jean timidly. Mikasa hid a small smile behind her red scarf. That was twice now that he had made her smile.
Mikasa didn't say it but she also enjoyed his company. He is a good listener and didn't treat her presence like an annoyance, unlike her adoptive brother. She hasn't felt so comfortable in a long time. feeling disappointed that they have to return to their screwed up lives.
"Yes," she replied and turned back "Bye Jean."
She started walking away, Jean wanted to say something but words didn't come to him so he just stood there until she disappeared. He wanted to slam his head on a wall, but still, today was the first time that he had an actual conversation with Mikasa and they both had enjoyed it. Well, he hoped that she enjoyed it too.
Today a little hope has been reignited that he may have a chance with the oriental woman but he dared not have his expectations raised too high, they could just as easily be crushed. He had other things to worry about. First, he had to join the scouts and then train himself to catch up with Mikasa. Right now, he stood nowhere near the skill level of someone like her. She had earned the title of 'War Goddess' and he'll be damned if he let her leave him in the dust again.
Today marks the beginning of a new journey in Jean Kirstein's life and this time he will be prepared for whatever comes in his way.
With Mikasa
Today's morning was quite unexpected but a pleasant one nonetheless. She was not able to sleep properly. Worried about Eren and wondering if he was being treated properly by the scouts. Yesterday's trial was mentally exhausting for her. She never expected them to bring up the event from 6 years back and it had opened up old wounds.
She was surprised that they were able to dig up that incident and when people had started questioning her mental stability, it took all her willpower to stop herself from breaking down right there. How could they judge her like that ? Most of them have not gone through even half of what she has suffered.
However, the worst of all was when Eren was getting beaten up by the short captain. After first few hits, she had decided that it was enough and she had to interfere but was stopped by Jean. She wanted to beat him up as well, but when she saw his eyes, they were stern and hard. It made her reconsider her actions and she is grateful for that because if she had intervened, Eren may have been executed or worse, dissected and experimented on by the Military Police.
Since she couldn't sleep, she decided to go for a walk. It was a chilly morning with a cold breeze blowing, so she tightened her favourite scarf around her neck After 10 minutes of wandering, she sat down on the bench looking at the fountain in front of it. It was nothing fancy, just a regular fountain with some floral design but her mind was occupied by her adoptive brother.
She was deep in thought and didn't hear another person sitting next to her until she heard a familiar voice greeting her. She was surprised to see Jean there but greeted him back.
For the next half hour they talked about recent events and she was starting to enjoy his company but when he told her about Marco's death, she was shocked which immediately turned into sadness. She was not very close to Marco, or anyone else for that matter, but she knew that he was a good person. He was very polite and caring guy and the most tolerable guy for her outside Eren and Armin. He was too young and kind hearted for such a horrible fate.
This made her realize that how many lives have been lost to take back Trost and protect Eren. She would forever be grateful to every person who gave up their lives for mankind's cause.
She could see that the worst affected by his death is the ashen haired man and she doesn't know what comes over her to hold his hand. It did seem to work as he visible relaxes from her touch and she feels happy that she is able to comfort him in some way.
She questioned Jean about which branch he will enroll for and his answer surprised her . She listened to his reasoning and was impressed by the change in him. After that, they fell in a comfortable silence. This is the most relaxed she has been in the last 72 hours and she didn't want this bubble of peace to be broken.
But as most good things come to an end, they had their duties to perform and report to their superiors. They exchanged goodbyes, although Jean was starting to become flustered. This amused Mikasa but she hid her smile behind her scarf and walked away. She could feel his gaze on her back as she retreated to the female side of barracks.
A smile adorning her face the entire way.
