It was here. The day I had dreaded since the night of Naomi's announcement had arrived. While Ruth and Naomi had been busy making travel preparations, I had been mulling over my choice. I had also become more distant from Ruth, preparing myself for that painful separation. Now, it had come.
Ruth ran to me from the house as I walked around our bit of land, thinking. "Orpah, I must talk to you," she said breathlessly.
"What is it?" I asked, trying not to let my grief show.
"Come with us," she said. "It won't be as hard if we all come together."
"I can't go to be with a new people! What if they reject us?"
"Naomi's God will protect us," she said confidently.
"Naomi's God?"
"Yes! She told me about him. He is not like our gods. He is sovereign over everything, and he loves us. He is a wonderful God, and I am going to trust him.
"God has a purpose for everything. Naomi told me a story about how he waited four hundred years to rescue the Israelites from slavery in Egypt, but when he did deliver them, it was full of signs and wonders, an unforgettable testimony to his power.
"That's what Naomi and I were talking about. She said that when she was small, her mother died, but when she prayed to God, he comforted her. I decided to try praying to him, and I felt a peace inside me that I would never felt before. Naomi is bitter right now, but I just know God will do something amazing. I want you to see it!
"Meet the one true God, Orpah! He will heal the wounds of your heart, and he will provide for us, even in a new land! Please come with us. Will you?"
I listened to this monologue incredulously. What had happened to my friend? She had always been so logical, and now she was throwing her common sense to the wind, forsaking all she had learned for some delusion to appease her aching heart. If God cared so much for us as well as having complete control, then why did he kill Elimelech? Why did he kill our husbands? No, Ruth was crazy. She was going under, and she was trying to take me with her. I became angry with her.
"Ruth, you honestly expect me to believe that a sovereign God who loves us would kill off the whole family of one of his worshipers? That story about Egypt is just a legend, exaggerated with time. Even if this God of yours is real, he is undoubtedly cruel. I'm not going to follow him."
"But, Orpah…"
"Don't talk to me anymore. I do not want to hear anything more about this God. If he is your best friend now, go talk to him. Maybe he'll be the just God he is and kill Naomi too!"
I turned around and stormed away. I regretted my words the instant I said them, but I would not take anything back. I was right, and Ruth was wrong. That was the whole story. Still, that night I cried myself to sleep in my own bed. I felt so empty.
I sewed on my little sister's dress as I thought. It was supposed to be my first anniversary, but the events of the past year troubled me. No matter what I did, the pain would not go away. I still missed Kilion greatly, and Ruth even more. My last words to her still haunted me. What an awful thing to say to her! Tears began to flow down my face. I had acquired some new friends, but none could replace her.
Mother walked in and saw me crying. She knelt and put her arms around me. "I'm so sorry, dear," she said. "Today must be a hard day for you."
I simply nodded. She sensed that I wanted to be left alone and complied with my wishes. As I stared unseeing at the dress in my hands, I thought of Ruth's last words to me, to pray to God. I clenched my teeth. Unless this God did something truly amazing, I would not trust him. However, Ruth's suggestion did have a grain of truth to it. Before, I had tried to relieve the pain by ignoring it, but that did not work. Maybe our gods could help me. I began to cry to the Moabite pantheon, praying for them to help me. I was trying to light my own candle, but it would not ignite.
