A/N: and the third chapter is here! I had so much fun writing this chapter, and I hope you have fun reading it :) xx
-The master has entered the conversation-
-Captain sexyy has entered the conversation-
The master says- err… not trying to sound rude or anything but…. Do I know you?
Captain sexyy says- nope. I'm Captain John Hart. I'm dating Owen and I'm Jack's ex
The master says- you dated Harkness?
Captain sexyy says- yeah. The sex was-
The master says- stop, stop, stop I don't want to know.
Captain sexyy says- so who are you?
The master says- I'm the Master. I'm a timelord and kind of dating the Doctor.
Captain sexyy says- aren't you the one who tried to kill us all twice?
The master says- yep, both failed. The plans were bloody brilliant though.
Captain sexyy says- oh yeah! I read all about you, I'm a great fan of your work
-Martha has entered the conversation-
Martha says- well if you ask me
The master says- good job nobody did
Martha says- I don't even know why the Doctor is even on civil terms with you, let alone dating youThe master says- its coz I'm a sex god :D
Martha says- what is it that you have, that I don't?
Captain sexyy says- a life?
The master says- *sniggers*
Martha says- well you smell!
The master says- fail.
Martha says-you're a fail!
Captain sexyy says- your hair's a fail
The master says-yeah, it's like a massive floating pineapple
Martha says- my hair does not look like a pineapple!
The master says- and I mean, what's up with it anyway, can't you wear it in a ponytail or something?
Martha says-it's a messy bun!
Captain sexyy says- why is it pointy?
Martha says- BECAUSE IT IS!
The master says- can you stab someone with it?
Martha says- LEAVE ME ALONE!
Captain sexyy says-does sponge bob live in your hair?
Martha says- SHUT UP!
-Owen "burn" Harper has entered the conversation-
-Coffee King has entered the conversation-
Owen "burn" Harper says- Hi John! xx
Captain sexyy says- hey! I've made reservations for dinner tonight xx
Coffee King says- *cough*
Captain sexyy says- okay, I asked Ianto to make us reservations for dinner
Martha says- oh look, it's the spawn of the devil
Coffee King says- …
The master says- Ignore her. She's just grumpy because I've got her man :D
Martha says- when he realises what a loser you are he'll come running back to me
Captain sexyy says-what do you mean come running back to you? When was he ever with you in the first place?
The master says-ohhhh burn :D
-Martha has left the conversation-
Owen "Burn" Harper says- oh dear, someone's a little cranky today. What have you two been saying to her?
The Master says- nothing…..
Captain sexyy says- …much :D
Coffee King says- well you two seem to be getting along rather well
-I love my Welshman has entered the conversation-
I love my Welshman says- Ianto? You have post, I've left it on your desk
Coffee King says- Okay I'm just reading it now… it's from the government? …oh.
Owen "Burn" Harper says- what does it say?
Coffee King says- Hello, Ianto Jones. We have heard of you, your story has been spread throughout space, the myth of the coffee boy and his amazing welshness. We want you upon our ranks, to supply us with your gorgeous coffee and to destroy our enemies with your sarcastic awesomeness. We want you as our God, Ianto Jones. If you refuse to join us… you will be exterminated. Dalek Cann
I love my Welshman says- ….
The master says- …..
Owen "burn" Harper says- …
Captain sexyy says- … so you gonna do it?
Owen "burn" Harper says- -slap-
Captain sexyy says- ow! What was that for?
-Gwen is hot has entered the conversation-
The master says- Oh good grief, here we go again
Gwen is hot says- Wot's Up GuyZz loolz
I love my Welshman says- Ianto got a letter from a dalek asking to make him their god because of his amazing welshness.
Gwen is Hot says- Wot? I Am WeLshH Y dId EyeE nOt GetT ChOSen Bi A AlIeN rACEe 2 b THEiR God?
The Master says- because you aren't awesome.
Gwen is Hot says- WoTt U on BouT? I AM so AwEsOMe! I Am ThE HeARt Of Da TeaM!
Owen "burn" Harper says- more like the body waste.
I love my Welshman says-er… Ianto? I've just been reading the conversation… and… SINCE WHEN ARE YOU A TIME LORD?
The master says- since I discovered that male timelords could get pregnant :D
Coffee King says- I'm so sorry Jack… I didn't want you to find out like this
The Doctor- Jack, you got off lightly. At least you didn't find out you had a son through MSN.
I love my Welshman says- how can I even trust you Ianto? If that even is your real name?
The master- oh no, Ianto Jones is his actual name. I named him Ianto (I've always liked Wales) and we all know that my earth name is Harold Saxon, but my galifraean surname is actually Jonai, which, were you to translate it into English is Jones.
I love my Welshman says- I'm sorry, but this is too much.
-I love my Welshman has left the conversation-
Coffee King says- I'm going to go and talk to him, to try and sort this mess out :(
-Coffee King has left the conversation-
-Tosh has entered the conversation-
Tosh says- hey guys, what's been going on?
The master says- Ianto's a time lord, he's my son, daleks love his coffee, Gwen's the poo of torchwood and sponge bob lives in Martha's hair.
Tosh says- … ok…
Captain sexyy says- And Jack's annoyed because Ianto didn't tell him
Tosh- Jack's not annoyed….
Owen "Burn" Harper says- how do you know?
Tosh says- because from here I can see them, and it looks like they're having sex over Gwen's desk
Gwen is hot says- WTF?
-Gwen is hot has left the conversation-
-PC plod has entered the conversation-
PC plod says- hey all! It's Andy!
Tosh says- hey Andy, you alright?
PC plod says- yeeahhhhhhhhhhhhhh! I'm great!
Owen "Burn" Harper says- Er… Andy?
PC plod- YEAH?
Captain sexyy says- you seem very… happy?
PC plod says- what you talking about?
The master says- you're using a lot of "!"s.
PC plod says- wellllll! I took parrrrttt iiinnn aaaa drruuuugggsss raid this mooornnniinnngggg and I waasssss mmaaakkkiiinnngggg teaaaa in the kitttcccchhheeennnnn and found some whiitttteeee pooowwwddderrrr which I'm assuming was ssuugggarrr and put it in my tea and nowww I feel really hhhhhhhhhyyyyyyppppeerrr and happy and I don't knnoowwww whyyyyyyyyy! :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :)
The master says- …
-The master has left the conversation-
-Tosh has left the conversation-
-Owen "Burn" Harper has left the conversation-
-Captain sexyy has left the conversation-
PC plod- okaayyy gguuuyyyssss I'llll jjuussstttt wwaiitt for you to commee baacckkkk! :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :)
A/N: ahh I love PC andy :') review please :D and I know I promised you cookies If you reviewed last time, they're… um… in the post but this time if you review I'll give you…. GWEN! Actually… wait no I want you to review… ok I'll give you JACK ;) much love xx
