~I'm holdin' on your rope,
Got me ten feet off the ground.
And I'm hearin' what you say,
But I just can't make a sound.
You tell me that you need me,
Then you go and cut me down...
But wait...
You tell me that you're sorry,
Didn't think I'd turn around...
That it's too late to apologize.
It's too late...
I said it's too late to apologize.
It's too late.
Yeah ~ Apologize, One Republic
It had been five months. Five months since they were born. She had spent all of her time dedicated to Maeve and Mac, as if the rest of the world didn't exist. She had been missing from SHEILD for 14 months, and it drove them crazy. Barton had almost quit until they found traces of her in Nevada at a small hospital, but she had disappeared afterwards. Loki had not let her go back to Midgard after their children were born. She had deep desire to go there, but she promised Loki that she'd stay there until they were nine months old. But even now, Loki had rethought his plans, and decided to let her go to Midgard.
They landed on top of the Stark Tower in New York City. Thor was awaiting their arrival.
"Hello Loki, Lady Natasha." Thor greeted them.
"Hello Thor." Loki said. Natasha nodded to him.
"Director Fury wishes to see you both." Thor said sadly. Loki immediately started to get worried.
"What is wrong?" He asked, worry clearly in his voice.
"I do not know what the Director wishes, but you must go to him." Thor said as he turned and walked away. Loki looked down at Natasha, who shrugged.
"It shouldn't be too bad."
"I what?" Natasha yelled, standing up, her chair falling down backwards.
"I said," Fury said calmly, "You are not allowed to leave SHEILD's premises for 14 months. Its how long you've been gone, its how long we will keep you locked up."
"You know how I get when I'm locked up!" she seethed. The director did nothing to deny it.
"We know. You will still not be allowed to leave. If you do," he paused. "Consequences." Fury seemed so calm about it.
"I must disagree with that, Director-" Loki tried to say.
"I don't care about your opinion. Frankly, I don't care for yours either Romanoff. Whats said is done." Fury paused, and turned to face Loki. "You are not allowed to come back here. Got it?"
"And what if I don't leave?"
"Then I'll lock your ass up back where it was before. This time, I'll shove the Hulk in with ya. Got it?"
"Fine." Natasha said, pulling her chair back up and siting down. "But I get to see him once more." Loki was about to talk but Fury cut him off.
"Deal. Romanoff, go to your quarters. Loki, get the hell out of here." They both didn't move from their seats. "Do you want me to call them in?"
"We're not leaving." Natasha stated. At that exact moment, Hawkeye, the Captain, and Tony barged in.
"Hey!" Tony exclaimed. "We heard you corralled them." Steve gave him a 'don't say anything else' look.
"You know what to do." Fury said. Hawkeye immediately went for Natasha, but Loki got there before him and blocked him.
"Don't you dare." Loki hissed.
"I can and I will." Hawkeye breathed before trying to knock Loki out of the way, but Loki was quick and blocked his blows. The next thing he knew, the Captain had grabbed him and was dragging him away. Loki knew that he'd be seperated from Natasha if they took him now. Right before the Captain was about to exit the room, Loki stuck his leg out and tripped him, forcing the Captain to fall backwards and let Loki go. Loki immediately went for Natasha, who was in Hawkeyes possession. She was screaming at him to let go of her, shivering with anger. He grabbed her from Hawkeye and kissed her, fiercely, intimately, like they would never see each other again. The next thing Loki knew, he was being dragged out by Tony and the Captain, and Natasha was back in Hawkeyes possession. His world went black when the door closed behind them.
Loki had escaped the prison in Stark Tower and returned to his children. Every night he had come to her to keep her sane. He told her about the children, how they were doing. He was genuinely worried for her. One night when he came, she asked him to leave.
"Why?" he asked, concerned that there was something wrong that she didn't want to tell him.
"Can you please just leave?" she looked him straight in the eye and gave him her best pleading face.
"Fine," he succumbed to her. "but I'm still coming tomorrow."
"Okay." she hugged him until he disappeared.
The next day, she asked him to leave again. It was getting on his nerves. He didnt' know why she was acting this way. Maybe she was just getting distant. Maybe she just wanted to see him. It broke his heart to think that she didn't want him anymore, but her actions seemed intended to show that to him. He was worried for her, scared even. Had they put her on some kind of drug? Had they manipulated her into thinking he was the bad guy? He had changed, and it was quite noticeable. Loki didn't know what to do, or what to ask her. She wouldn't give him any answers, and he decided not to fish for any.
On Natasha's birthday, he had gone out to get her a single red rose. He had read somewhere that a single red rose depicts utmost devotion to the person who receives it., so he thought of it as a perfect present. But when he got there, he was greeted by an ugly surprise. Natasha was half naked, her bra and pants still on, kissing Hawkeye fiercely against the wall. He, who was shirtless, was kissing her back with the same amount of passion. It was the worst sight for him to see.
"I love you." she murmured in between kisses.
To hear her moan for him, to see her look at him with that desire she had given him. His heart was shattered, broken into a million pieces. The anger had not come in yet. It was all feelings of guilt, betrayal, and sorrow. He couldn't say anything, only stand there and let the red rose fall out of his hand. He stared at them, unable to pull his eyes away from her. Doubts of their whole relationship passed through his mind. Everything he feared was coming alive. That she would leave him for the hawk. That he would be left alone forever.
It took them a good give minutes to realize that Loki was there. By then, a single tear streaked down his cheek.
"Loki!" Natasha exclaimed breathlessly. "What are you doing here?"
"I could ask the same thing for him." he answered coldly.
"Look, this isn't what is seems-" Loki couldn't stand it anymore. All of the sudden the sound of her voice got him irritated. The way she look at him made him even more mad.
"How could you." He said. He didn't dare scream or yell. It would only bring attention to them. "After everything, you go and make love to that hawk. Dammit! You have children with me!" he stayed calm on the outside, but his voice was filled with hurt and anger. "You even said that you'd never leave, yet you do." Another tear made its way down his face. Natasha made her way closer to him. She tired to touch him but he swat her arm away. "Don't you dare touch me." he hissed, stepping back. He could see the hawk out of the corner of his eyes, staring at them openly.
"Loki I'm sorry." she whispered, her voice uneven.
"Thats a lie." he said. "Everything about you was a lie!" he couldn't keep himself calm anymore. "I let you in and let you see the real me, and what you do in return? You go and make love to that hawk of yours!" he took a deep breath. "You never truly loved me, did you." Loki said.
"Loki of course I loved you!"
"You loved me! It was the past! I just can't stand it." Loki wiped away the sheen line of sweat on his face. Natasha moved forward and kissed him fiercely, but Loki pushed her away so there was a four foot distance between them. "Did you ever think of the outcome of your actions? Did you?" he waited for her answer. Tears were flooding down her face as she looked down at the carpet.
"No." she whispered.
"I thought I actually knew you. I thought that we were something there. Turns out it was all a lie. You took advantage of me. Took advantage of my feelings. Did you even care?" When she didn't answer, Loki got even more mad.
"Fuck this." he hissed. Loki ran out of the room and into the hallway. He didn't care who saw him. He was angry. Loki was on a mad dash to find his way out of the Stark's building. He needed to get away. He ran through the different floors, knocking over many people, one of them was Tony Stark himself.
"Hey Loki!" he said. When he got a good look at Loki, his eyes widened. "What happened?"
"None of your concern." Loki yelled behind him as he ran off. He jumped down many flights of stairs, not bothering to take the elevator. He could hear her following him, going quickly, but not fast enough. When he got outside, it was pouring rain. He smiled. It was like those Midgardian movies he had seen. He heard Natasha so he started running down the NY streets in the middle of the night. Not many people were out that night. They were all at home with their own minor problems.
"Stop!" he did so, and decided to listen to her side of the story. "I'm sorry, okay? I was stupid, and lost in the moment. I was confused and scared, and I didn't know what to do. I'm just sorry I-"
"Have you ever read the book To Kill A Mockingbird?" Loki asked. Natasha was shocked from the question.
"N-no." she stuttered. She was shivering from the cold, her hair was drench and so were here clothes. Loki desperately wanted to hug her, tell her everything was okay, but everything wasn't okay. Everything was terrible.
"I suggest reading it," Loki paused. "Because there is one part where the father said, 'You don't know someone until you look at things from their point of view, slip into their shoes and crawl around in their skin.' Why don't you try it." Loki felt on the verge of tears. He didn't know what to do. He was completely heartbroken and ripped apart.
"I just want to know why!" He screamed. The nearest pedestrians gave them looks of sorrow. As if they knew what they were talking about. "Why you would go and be so selfish! Why!" He screamed out the last word. She started sobbing, tears streaming freely down her face.
"Loki, I'm sorry, I-"
"I don't want your apology. I think you've caused enough damage to be over apologizing." he said coldly. Loki closed his eyes. "Do you remember when you said forever and always? Because I damn do. I remember it like it happened yesterday. You made a promise, and yet here we are today, arguing like children that both want the same toy." Loki took a deep breath.
"I'm setting you free, Natasha, because if you love someone you should set them free." he paused and stared at her right in the eyes. "I will never forgive you, so remember. If you plan on breaking the archers heart, that was the right way to do it. Adieu, Natasha." Loki teleported himself away. He vowed never, ever to fall in love again. No matter who it was. He vowed to make sure his children never fell for someone who would break their heart, just like his was broken.
Any good? I was unable to sleep until I finished the chapter. Its longer than usual so thats good. You may be thinking "Now what?" The next chapters will each be spanned out year by year of how their children grow up with no mother. YES, I do not intend on making Natasha a main character anymore, but I do intend on putting someone else as their substitute mother.
Ciao~
blackpeagsus
PS- Adieu means a long term farewell in French.
