Updated for the first time in about a year or more, POTC chapter 3! Sorry for the delay, I've been busy, what with high school and everything... and writer's block...

The crew of the Black Pearl dropped anchor at the mouth of the Pantano River and took the long boats to Tia Dalma's shack. The trees got thicker as they rowed up river, turning the bright morning darker. Fireflies floated around them, one of which got fried when it landed on Thrax's claw. Through the darkness, they saw people standing in the murky water. Ozzy held Leah's hand. Soon, a lighted shack came into view. They docked and Captain Barbossa told Gibbs to mind the boats. Gibbs passed it on to Marty, who passed it on to Pintel, then to Ragetti, all the way until only Cotton was left. A crocodile came around the shack and hissed at the pirates.

Captain Barbossa was the first to enter the shack. Sitting at the table in the center of the room was a girl, no younger than 16. She had big, brown eyes and soft brown hair tied back with a leather cord. Other than the hair and age difference, she looked like a mini Tia Dalma.

"So you took over?" Barbossa asked the girl.

"More like inherited." she answered in a Jamaican accent. "Calypso came to me in a dream and said I was to take her place here. Of course, when I came to dis shack, I ran into a thief. I sent him away, where he'll learn not to steal again."

"Jack's gonna be there a long time, then." Gibbs said.

"Well, baby," Thrax said. "When you sent him there, you sent us here. How are we supposed to get back?"

"You have de compass?" she asked.

"You mean this broken one?" Thrax asked as he took it off his belt.

"It points toward the thing you want most." she said.

"How did Jack get that compass?" Ragetti asked. The girl smiled.

"Dat is a juicy story, but I cannot tell you. Once you find de answer, you will find your way home. I suggest you start at de beginning." She sat back in her chair, satisfied that she managed to confuse a whole ship full of guys.

"What the Frank does that mean?" Ozzy asked.

"You'll find out. Now, I helped you, so where's my payment?"

"Take him." Thrax said, pushing Ozzy forward. Frowning at Thrax, Leah pulled her boyfriend back to her. Barbossa dug through his pocket, pulled out something wrapped in cloth, and tossed it towards the strange girl. She unwrapped it and smiled. The crew couldn't see it, but they weren't sure if they wanted to.

"Fair enough. Now, Angel, show deez men to the door." A crocodile crawled out from behind her table and snapped at Pintel's ankles. The pirates scrambled to get out.

"Well, that was productive." Gibbs said.

"How are we s'posed to find out how Jack got that compass?" Marty asked.

"I do remember Tia Dalma saying he bartered it from her." Gibbs said.

"Yeah, I remember that, too." Pintel said.

"When we get back to the ship, we'll figure it out." Barbossa said.

Meanwhile in Frank:

"Jack!" Jack Sparrow turned around to look at Elizabeth. They were in a police department, waiting for Drix to get the Chief of Frank PD and the other officers to believe that Jack wasn't a virus and that Thrax, Leah, and Ozzy were somehow switched with humans. While they were waiting, Jack was touching everything and leaving behind dirty fingerprints.

"Jack, just sit down." Will said. Jack sat down, but started tapping his feet and biting his nails.

"Jack, are you alright?" Elizabeth asked.

"No, I am bloody not alright!" he snapped. Then, with a childish tone, added, " I want my ship..."

"Well, then you shouldn't have messed with Tia Dalma's stuff." Will said.

"But I can't help it." Jack said. "I like stuff."

"How are we supposed to get home?" Elizabeth asked.

"I got it!" Jack exclaimed. "We simply use my compass and find our way out of..." Jack checked his pockets. "Um, I unfortunately left my compass in my other pants..." Will and Elizabeth groaned. Suddenly, Drix came out, along with the Chief of Police.

"Slight setback." Drix said. "We have to talk to the mayor for a pardon."

"Anything to get home." Will said. The five of them squeezed into a cop car (thank goodness for their stretchy cars!) and they sped off towards the brain.

"First my clothes, then my ship, now my compass..." Jack muttered. "This is all turning into a bloody mess. And not even the good kind..."

"Stop complaining, Jack." Will said.

"William, do you have any idea what I paid for that ship?" Jack asked.

"I didn't think you paid at all for anything." Elizabeth replied. Jack smirked for a second.

"I didn't pay in money, but something else entirely..." Jack said.