Authors Note: Here is one more chapter for the week! :)
Olivia closed the wedding album and put it back onto the shelf. She looked at the clock on the wall. 3:11 am. It was going to be a long night. She walked back to the couch and sat down. She closed her eyes, thinking of the next memory that followed the wedding. She smiled thinking of the day her world changed yet again.
Olivia Benson sat on the edge of the tub, fidgeting. She was nervous. She had been feeling sick every morning for the past week or so. After talking to Melinda, she figured she was pregnant.
So here she was, locked in the bathroom, waiting for the timer to go off to give her the results. There was a knock at the door.
"Liv, are you ok? You have been in there for a while. Are you sick again?" Brian was trying to get in.
"I'll be out in a minute." The timer went off. She slowly stood up and took a deep breath. She picked up the pregnancy test. Tears filled her eyes with what she saw. She slowly walked over to the door and opened it, crying.
"Olivia what's wrong?" Brian looked at her with concern.
She smiled and held up the pregnancy test, "You're going to be a daddy."
Brian slowly smiled and hugged her. Both were too shocked for words. Their lives had just changed forever.
"We should get you a Doctor's appointment. To make sure everything is all good." Brian couldn't wipe the smile off his face.
"Yeah, I'll call a Doctor tomorrow."
Brian smiled down at her, "We are going to be parents."
Olivia laughed. "Yes we are."
Brian and Olivia went into the bedroom and got into their pajamas and soon feel asleep cuddled up to each other.
Leaning back on the couch, Olivia smiled thinking of the joy she and Brian felt when they found out they would be parents. It was a life changing feeling. Tears filled her eyes, thinking of the day a week after they found out she was pregnant.
Olivia sat at her desk in the precinct, waiting for Brian to pick her up for her appointment. A week ago they had found out they were having a baby. When they told Fin, Cragen, Amanda and Nick that they were having a baby, they were all so happy. They all knew Olivia and Brian would be amazing parents and that no one deserved it more than Olivia.
Brian walked into the squad room and walked over to Liv. "You ready?"
She looked up at him and smiled, "Yes."
Brian helped her stand up. Ever since she told him she was pregnant he had been overprotective of her.
Olivia said goodbye to her co-workers and they all wished her luck and that everything was ok with the baby.
30 minutes later Brian and Olivia were in the Doctor's office. Olivia lay on the examination table and Brian sat in the chair beside her, holding her hand. The door opened and Olivia's Doctor walked in.
"Are you two ready to see your baby?" She asked as she sat down.
They both nodded smiling.
"Olivia, I'll just get you to roll up your shirt."
Olivia rolled up her shirt and held Brian's hand.
"This may be cold." The Doctor warned as she put the gel on Olivia's lower abdomen. The Doctor grabbed the ultrasound wand and turned the screen to face them. She started moving the wand around Olivia's stomach. "Here is your baby!"
Olivia's eyes filled with tears as she gripped Brian's hand, smiling at each other.
"You should be able to hear a heartbeat in a few seconds." The Doctor moved the wand a little bit. She frowned and tried pressing buttons on the machine.
"Is something wrong?" Brian was concerned.
"I'm not sure. One moment please." The Doctor stood up and walked out of the room.
Olivia looked at Brian. He looked just as scared as she felt. Before either of them could say anything their Doctor walked in followed by another Doctor.
They both looked at the screen with frowns. The mumbled some things to each other. Olivia over heard some of it, "No movement." "No heartbeat."
The other Doctor left them room and Olivia's Doctor wiped the gel off her stomach. "I'm so sorry. We don't really know why these things happen."
Olivia closed her eyes and cried. She tried to compose herself, but her whole world had just come crashing down around her. She didn't know what the nurse was saying. She heard her and Brian talking. She felt Brian grab her hand and pull her up. They walked sadly out of the hospital.
The car ride home was quiet. Neither of them could talk. Olivia hadn't stopped crying since. Brian parked the car and helped Olivia out of the car. When they got up to the apartment Olivia walked in and walked into the bedroom lying down.
Brian was in the kitchen putting dishes away when he heard the most heartbreaking sound. His wife was in their bedroom sobbing. He put down the dish he was drying and walked into the bedroom. Olivia was lying on her side facing the wall sobbing. Brian crawled into the bed beside her and pulled her to him. He kissed the top of her head and held her.
"Liv, we can try again in a few months." He was having a hard time trying to stay strong for her. He was so sad that this happened to them. Of all people it had happened to Olivia.
She held back a sob and took a deep breath. "Why us? What did we do to deserve this?"
"I don't know why this happened, Liv. I wish I could make it better. But everything happens for a reason and we are going to be ok."
Olivia closed her eyes, silently crying. Soon both Brian and Olivia fell asleep wrapped in each other's arms.
Olivia wiped her eyes. That day was one of the most horrible days ever. She had been so excited to become a mom and she felt she had failed. She never told Brian, but she blamed herself for the miscarriage. She would always blame herself for that. Standing up and wiping her eyes, she went quietly into the bedroom and lay back onto the bed closing her eyes. Hoping for sleep to come and take her thoughts from her.
