In Sir Hammerlock's voice: Bah, I was a day late with posting, my apologies!
Chapter 3: Start of a franchise
Welcome to Pandora, where you can take a crap without anyone ever finding out because it's already a sh*thole. Zing!
"Hm," Reine said as she looked over a map of Tokan on her ECHO device. "That idiot must've captured the scythid near these caverns. Even if he didn't, it'll be more than able to fend for itself. But how did he capture it… I almost got impaled by that thing."
She touched her left arm which still hurt from her reckless maneuver just a few hours before. She could only wrap so many bandages around it until her skin couldn't breathe anymore. Or she cut off her veins. She could handle a lot, but not that.
"I could ditch this thing and try to get off the planet still or…" Reine said.
A short ride with the Fast-Travel network later Reine arrived. The network did exactly what you'd think it would, save for that it cut you up in a gazillion pieces and basically teleported you to another destination free of charge. And yet bullets cost hundreds of dollars. The economy of Pandora was screwed up like that, partly thanks to the guy who held a monopoly on the gun and ammo business: Marcus Kincaid.
He was also the guy that gave the mohawk bandit his monster-trapping SDU that could store a thing as large as a badass. It was also batsh*t insane to sell it to such an idiot. And since things like that could get Reine killed, her preferred course of action was killing the idiots responsible, all the way up the chain if need be.
Reine walked into the Marcus munitions store and looked at an overweight guy that was hunched over with his back turned to her. Knowing the arms dealer had many tricks up his sleeves to avoid getting the short end of the stick in his lethal business, Reine made sure not to give him any time to turn around and do something. To be sure however she asked:
"Are you Marcus Kincaid?"
"Who me?" the guy said as he turned around and startled Reine, as behind him there appeared to be a couple of preteens all holding SDU's. "I am the friendly professor Oak."
Professor Oak
Trust the elderly man that gives presents to kids… right
There was no doubt in Reine's mind that this guy was in fact Marcus Kincaid, judging from his ECHO dating profile and the pictures plastered all over his vending machines. Though for some reason he'd donned a white lab coat and an eerie friendly looking smile.
Our bandaged traveler was however taken aback by this unexpected development. As she looked at the preteens, she cursed one of her crippling weaknesses: wanting to avoid shattering children's precious psyches if she were to brutally murder this man in front of them. Then again, judging from Marcus' twinkling eyes, this had been one of his many precautions and aims all along. There was one other reason.
"Are you here to get your first Bordermon, mister?" a girl squeaked at Reine as she held up her SDU. It was a monster-trapping one from the looks of it. "I got a Rakk. I bet it'll murder every single skag that tries to attack me."
That… was a creepy kid.
"It's unsafe to go out without a Bordermon of your own. Wild Bordermon live in tall grass, caves and every place you would want to explore. You need your own Bordermon for your protection… and also, get your parents to buy more SDU's from me so you can capture even more pets," Marcus or 'Professor Oak' said as his greedy eyes twinkled like fist-size nuggets of gold.
Reine shrugged. How little scrupules could a guy have?
"Professor," a boy said as he tugged on Marcus' sleeve, "Can't I get a Bordermon?"
Marcus' tone abruptly changed into his usual sleazy salesman bellowing.
"Get back when you've got some real scratch, kid," he answered.
"That doesn't sound like a nice thing to say," Reine said slyly.
Marcus turned to her.
"You're still here? Well then, buy something already!" he said before turning to the kids who looked kinda scared. "Eh eh I mean… What is your name?"
"Reine," our protagonist said.
"What?"
"Reine!"
"How do you spell that?"
"Urgh, why are you… Fine. R-E-I-N-E," Reine answered.
Marcus checked his ECHO device for a second.
"Hey I know you, you…" Marcus said with a look at the kids. "You're the woman who defeated Jimmy and got his scythid as a 'reward'. You must be interested in buying another SDU, am I right? Of course I am, right this way," Oak said, foregoing a gentle salesman's push, that one would use on a doubtful customer, for an outright shove towards Marcus' merchandise. No… not that merchandise. Although…
"So, what do you think?" Marcus said in his sugary sweet Oak voice as he gestured to all the different models of SDU's.
Though they all looked interesting, some for underwater species and others for trapping specific kinds of Bordermon more easily, Reine hadn't lost track of the reason she was here for even a split second.
"I'm not interested. Now look buddy, I need to know why you sold an SDU able to store a badass to a moron with a d*ck for a…"
Marcus immediately flew to the door and shoved the kids through it. He said:
"Bye bye kids, come again soon and if you shop anywhere else I'll have you k… castr… ah forget it."
He then turned to Reine.
"Now. What do you want?" he said in his real voice which was gruff and heavily accented.
I'm sure there's a joke in here about Russian villains and gun nuts in here somewhere, but I can't seem to find it.
"The badass SDU. You sold it to him, didn't you?" Reine said as she pulled out her shotgun.
"Sure I did. I also sold that gun you're holding to a guy a few weeks ago. Let me guess. He's dead, right?" Marcus said. "Now… You shouldn't underestimate a fat guy like me."
"I'm not, he is and you'll be joining him," Reine said.
"I don't think so," Marcus said, putting on a big grin. "I'm too rich to die."
"Well, I'll wish you the best of luck with that after I release the badass shock scythid that he captured and that I narrowly put back into this thing," Reine said as she held out the scythid's SDU.
"Hold it!" Marcus said as he stepped back. "Maybe we can make a deal… How about a 0,5% discount?"
Reine made a move with the SDU towards the ground. Marcus held out his hands.
"Wow wow," he said. "Alright I get it. You remind me of someone, though she's more… forthcoming with her assets. Think about it. Anyway, even if I wanted to kiss this lucrative Bordermon business goodbye, it wouldn't change anything. All kinds of illegitimate business owners are buying into this craze. I hear they even have Skagzilla condoms and Bordermon roleplay kits now. Oh and toasters that put spiderant marks in your bread. Selling like hotcakes."
"So.." Reine said as she pulled up an eyebrow. "Killing you won't solve anything?"
"No," Marcus replied as his finger hovered over his desk.
"Well," Reine said as she pointed her gun. "It'll still make me feel g…"
With a push of a button underneath Marcus' desk she had been teleported out of Marcus' store and after just a few moments she landed onto the desert plains.
After grunting a few times, Reine crawled onto all fours before standing up.
"F*cker," she whispered. She looked at her ECHO device. A message?
"Let that be a lesson for you. Nobody messes with Marcus Kincaid. But I decided that you could be useful to me. You don't disrupt my business, I don't kill you and I'll give you something extra when you buy from me if you do some stuff for me. Whaddaya say, partners?"
Reine spit on the ground as a response, while knowing full well it was two-way communication.
"Yes, you definitely remind me of my ex-wife. Well one of them anyway. You ever considered wearing purple? And then taking pictures while you're half…"
Reine gritted her teeth and interrupted him right there.
"How about I make you a promise right now that I'll buy your SDU's, capture a sh*t ton of murderous creatures with them and teach them to skin you alive," she said.
It was quiet on Marcus' end for about five minutes.
"Marry me," he said before Reine cut off the transmission.
She reflected on the current events momentarily as she had her ECHO device determine her location. In the end, no matter how much of an amoral bastard Marcus was, he was a very successful businessman and had connections with just about everyone on the planet, some grudgingly amicable, some less so. A partnership with him would prove to be invaluable in surviving this Bordermon hype. She sent a short message: 'Partners. Nothing else.'
That should prevent him from getting any ideas.
I on the other hand got thinking. Soon you'll be able to read 'A love letter to Marcus Kincaid, the sexy pudgy arms dealer of Pandora XOXOXO'. Look for it!
Guys, where are you going, I was kidding. Kidding! Seriously! Guys!
Well, that drove off half of my reader base. That just leaves you and me Bobby so… What do you want to read?
'More explosions.'
Good! Coming right up.
The badass shock scythid screeched as it threw its crackling balls… of electricity that is, in every direction, throwing the fourth bandit camp it had been sent out in so far in complete disarray. And it spread death everywhere as Reine finished off the rest using her Maliwan sniper rifle. Besides her on her high perch, laid Buzzsaw's SDU displaying a hologram of it indicating she could talk to it without letting it out. Knowing how eager Pandora's creatures were to kill any foe, this was a less cumbersome option.
"It's nice to not have to work so hard from time to time, isn't it Buzzsaw?"
Buzzsaw squeaked. It was unclear if he was agreeing or disappointed it couldn't dish out some damage himself.
Reine was already making an estimate of the cash and ammo she'd be able to reap from this raid when she heard footsteps behind her and turned around.
"Aha, found you," Cary Loak said as she took on a battle stance. "Let's battle."
"No," Reine said and looked through her sniper rifle. She had no time for this microbe of an opponent.
Cary was utterly shocked and yet somehow still managed to keep talking.
"W-What do you mean, no? You can't turn down a battle! That's against the rules!" Cary said.
"My answer is still no. If you keep talking, I won't be as agreeable as last time," Reine said. And that really was saying something.
"Oh come on," Cary said, still talking despite having dealt with Reine plenty of times before, "I gotta train more if I want to take on the Gym…"
Reine took a brief respite from her sniping and stood up. She looked down menacingly at the twerp and said: "What gym?"
