We didn't really chat much more after that. I wasn't in a mood to speak, Sam wasn't really certain what to say, and Jack… I think Jack knew something was wrong, but he didn't know what to do about it so he was following what me and Sam were doing, and staying silent. Once the tears stopped again I wiped them away, but I didn't move from my spot. Instead I tried to light a flame again, and again, and again, but it just… It wouldn't work. I'd have to wait until we were back at the Bunker to do more extensive testing. I doubted they'd drive me out to Utah, and in all honesty I didn't really remember the driving directions to the cabin. I'd just kind of gotten used to… Showing up there.
All my notebooks were there. So were my ingredients, my clothes, my…
That was actually all there was. I guess it doesn't take much to make a place home for yourself. Clothes. Notes and notebooks. Ingredients.
Memories.
Learning. Practicing. Creating. Living. I actually came to love what I did, and enjoyed being at that cabin. It was full of what I would even consider to be happy memories. The first time I successfully lit a candle on fire. Playing with Karma. Chess games with Crowley. Every spell I created and the process of doing it. These were all… These were good memories.
There were bad memories too, sure, but the good ones… The good ones outnumbered the bad. No matter how I thought about the place, I still couldn't help but love it.
I would go back eventually, to get what was mine. But right now… Right now I couldn't, both literally and metaphorically.
Eventually Dean came to the bars, his voice causing me to look up. "Hey, we're good to go." I moved out of the way so Sam could speak to his brother.
"Really?" Sam asked.
"Yeah. I gave her the talk. She's gonna need a minute, but she's cool." Dean took a moment to look in at all of us, and I saw a slight change in his facial expression when he looked at my face. "You guys alright?" He asked.
"Peachy." I muttered.
"I'm OK." Jack agreed. Dean's face blanched a little at that, and he turned to speak much quieter to Sam. "Does…" Jack looked over at me to ask a question. "Does Dean not like me?" I was spared from answering by a cry for help, coming from where Dean had just been. I looked over at the brothers, and could see the alarm on their faces as well.
"Be right back." Dean promised, turning to leave. I stalked towards the door, calling after him.
"What about letting us out?!" I asked. The elder Hunter ignored me, though, turning around a corner to deal with whatever was happening. I looked over at Sam, and folded my arms in front of me. "Really? No lockpicks on you? No nothing?"
"Shut up." Sam muttered, looking back over at Jack. He was still sitting on the cot, looking concerned. "Look," he grabbed my shoulder, shielding me from the Nephilim so that we wouldn't be overheard. "Whatever happens next, we're not killing this kid, alright?" He asked. I nodded.
"Yeah, no problem." I nodded with the words, and he relaxed just a little.
"Good." He motioned for me to move over to Jack, and I complied. We didn't know what was going on, and somebody needed to protect the Nephilim. I looked over at him, watching his facial expressions.
"What do you feel?" I asked quietly. In front of us, Sam shouted for his brother. I ignored that, and kept watch over Jack. "What's out there, Jack?"
"I don't know." He said.
"Can you get us out of here?"
"I don't know how."
"Can you try?"
"The door is locked." He motioned to the cell door as he spoke.
"Fair enough." I muttered. He had no idea what to do, that was obvious. I flicked my wrists on reflex, and remembered that my angel blades were in the hands of the sheriff. "Shit." I muttered. They were my only weapons. I had no power to rely on, no weapons, no anything.
I didn't think that I'd felt this defenseless in a long, long-ass time.
We could hear footsteps coming from down the hall, slow and relaxed. I had no idea whose they were, much less any way of knowing how to tell. I knew Sam didn't either, and I doubted either of us liked this situation. These bars wouldn't protect us from much, and if they had the keys or a gun then we were just fish in a barrel at that point.
"Jack, whatever happens, stay behind me." I kept my voice hushed as I gave directions to the Nephilim, positioning myself so that I could shield him. Castiel trusted him. Castiel believed in him. Castiel had faith in him. If Cas could do that, so could I.
Then the glass shattered on the door in front of us, with a blinding white light, and I truly believed that we were screwed. "Dean!" I shouted, getting no answer but instead two people walking in, dressed businesslike and neat.
Angels.
The second one flashed his eyes blue, and I could hear Jack's grunt of pain behind me. He fell to the ground, grasping his head, and on reflex I knelt to put a hand on him. Nothing happened, though, and I swore loudly. There was a creak of metal, followed by a loud crack as I looked up, and saw the cell door had been ripped off and tossed to the side like it was nothing. Sam aimed a punch at the one that came in, and I stood to fight as well. The angel just brushed it off like it was nothing, and slammed Sam in to the bars.
I kicked at her ribs, but my leg was caught before it could connect. Sam's headbutt to her nose caused her to drop my leg before anything worse could happen, but when she threw Sam… He hit the bricks hard, and I was torn between who to stand in front of.
The second angel came in to continue the assault on Sam, whereas the first one advanced towards me. "Angel whore," she sneered. I held my hand out on impulse, causing the angel to halt. When nothing happened, she smirked. "And… Powerless, too. Oh this will definitely please my bosses." She advanced quickly then, aiming a punch at my face. I blocked it, barely, but her next one to my ribs definitely connected. I fought back a grimace, aiming a knee to her stomach. It did nothing, though. She was an angel.
The realization that I wasn't strong enough to fight back this time hit me like a freight train.
"How does it feel," she asked, shoving me in to the brick. "To be the most useless person in the room now? How does it feel to no longer have Castiel to protect you, or that stolen grace, or any sort of power?"
"How does it feel to know he'd rather bang a human than an angel?" I spat back, spitting in her face. She glared, and swung a punch hard across my jaw. Then she threw me in to the bars, and reached down to grab Jack's arms. My head connected solidly with metal, and I slumped to the ground. I couldn't see straight. I couldn't think straight. I could just barely remember that there were only two angels in the room, not four, and one of them… One of them was beating mercilessly on Sam, whereas the other was trying to take the kid. "Jack," his name came out slurred from my mouth. "Leave him alone."
It wasn't working, though. I reached a hand forwards again, trying to push the angels away, but… But nothing was happening. Something had to happen. Anything had to happen. I spat blood, and tried to stand.
"Get back down, whore." The angel ordered, aiming a kick towards me. "We'll deal with you next, don't worry." The kick connected solidly with my chin, knocking my head back in to the bars solidly. There was a ringing sound, and I could… my head… I didn't even know. I couldn't focus enough to know. I couldn't make sense of anything. There were angels. There was Sam. Dean wasn't there. I… I…
I could've sworn I heard Castiel's voice, in my mind. He was shouting for me to get up, shouting for me to move, to do something, but I just… I couldn't. I couldn't make the idea of the action connect with the necessary functions to go through with it. All I knew was that there were angels, and that they probably weren't about to take me to Heaven.
"Cas…" I muttered. There was a blindingly bright flash of light, and eight people became four… wait… there weren't eight people… there were… there were only two, now. Sam… Sam and Jack…
Had Castiel answered me? He couldn't have, there were only four – no, two Kylie. Only two people – in the room. Someone must've done the thing… with the symbol… and the blood…
"Sam," I croaked, squinting. There was more to my sentence, I knew there was, but I couldn't remember exactly what. The headache didn't go away, but Jack looked like he was just normal Jack. Wasn't him. Concussion, probably, or something else.
I heard what sounded like a door again, and footsteps behind me. Sam moved out of the cell, and Jack… He stood near me, right up next to the bars. This other woman was talking, and there was movement followed by more light. Jack was a foot in front of me, with an angel blade protruding out of his chest.
"Jack?" I asked, having to focus to make sure what I was seeing was real. Castiel was there, an angel blade protruding from his chest. It wasn't Castiel, though. When I blinked, it was Jack, pulling the blade out of his chest. Another blink, and it was still Jack. No Castiel.
Sam ran to Jack, making sure he was OK, whereas I found Dean in front of me. At least, when I blinked a few times he stayed Dean. "Hey, hey, kiddo, you with me?" He asked, feeling the back of my head. I blinked, and it was still Dean. His fingers came away just fine (how many fingers was he holding up? Six? Eight? Too blurry to tell), and he let out a small sigh of relief. "Good. Not too bad. Stay with me, OK?" He looked over at his brother and Jack for a moment, motioning them towards me. "Let's get her to the car." I blinked again, and it was Castiel. Nobody else was there.
"Cas?" I asked, squinting. The front of his shirt blossomed red, and I blinked again. Dean was there. Dean was helping me up. There were two other sets of arms helping to stabilize me as I rose, but I couldn't quite get the ground under my feet to stay solid.
"No, Kylie." Dean's voice, shaking his head. "No, Cas… Cas isn't here."
They helped me get in to the car, and for a moment I could've sworn I saw an ambulance outside. It wasn't important, though. Dean talked to someone as Sam set me up with a few things. Water. Some sort of medicine. I leaned heavily against the doorframe, but I was sitting upright in the car. As more and more time went on, I started to put the pieces back together in my head again.
More importantly, I stopped seeing Cas at random intervals when I blinked. Each time I did see him, he was in the car with me, but… There was still that wound in his chest. He wasn't saying anything, wasn't even looking at me. He just… he looked dead.
Nobody was in the car with me, though. That I knew, and did my best to keep that thought implanted in my mind. Sam and Dean were outside. There… There actually was an ambulance, and Sam and Dean were watching it. The kid… Jack… He was outside too, on a bench. Cas…
No, Cas wasn't there. Cas wasn't in the car with me. Castiel was dead.
When they all got in the car, I knew what had to happen next. Sam and Dean didn't say it, but I knew. Jack asked, though, sitting next to me.
"Where are we going?" The Nephilim asked.
"We…" Sam glanced back over at me as Dean answered, making sure I could take the news. I already knew, though. I nodded at him. "We're going back to the house."
"Why?"
"There's something we have to take care of." Sam replied, looking over at me again. "Are you alright?"
"The world isn't spinning anymore." I replied. "And… And I can form correct sentences. It all still hurts like a mother, but… I'm OK."
"That's not what I meant." Sam stated. I didn't look at him this time, just turned my gaze out the window.
"I said I'm OK, didn't I?" I asked. He didn't say anything else, just turned forwards as Dean started the car.
