Authors note:

Maybe, I should write angst more often? Thank you for all you reviews so far on this story. I love reading them all thank you for taking the time out to comment and read this story. Follow and favourite. Just to warn it's a super emotional chapter. Slight trigger warning off talk about tragic and loss.

I Want You Back Part 3


The Next Morning...

When Rick left last night from Michonne's, he was feeling deflated as he sat in his SUV for a few minutes before driving back to his empty home.

He was hoping they were getting back on track or at least starting to, but now he wasn't so sure. Not after how she acted. Rick had called Daryl and Shane up asking them to meet him in the morning for breakfast.

Rick was currently sitting in the booth, drinking his black cup of coffee.

"I miss her. I miss her, so damn much. Last night just proved that, even more."

Rick watched Shane and Daryl tuck into their breakfast of eggs, bacon, sausages and toast. Rick didn't have the stomach for anything heavy. When he went home last night he sat and had more than a couple of beers. So he had a slight headache from his hangover.

"Man, I don't know what to say," Shane was speechless for the first time in years.

"So, what happened?" Daryl questioned.

"Last night, it was good. I thought we were getting back on track. I thought that this was it. We had such a good evening. It was me, her, and Judith laughing and talking just like old times. Then I put Judith to be bed, came downstairs and she asked if I wanted to watch a film, but I wasn't interested in no damn film...and then we kissed..."

"Wait, hold on you kissed?" Shane stopped eating and held his knife and fork in his hand looking up at Rick.

"Yeah," Rick replied.

"Then why do you not look all happy and shit," Daryl spoke.

"Who made the first move?" Shane asked.

Rick leaned back in the booth rubbing his hand down the side of his face, feeling exhausted.

"Me, it was me. I moved in and then she moved in," he shook his head looking to the side before looking back at his best friends.

"Then she just... just pushed me away again."

"Man, what are you going to do?" Daryl asked.

"I don't know," he let out a deep breath.

"I want to talk to her, but I don't know if I should leave it for a few days and try after that. I don't know. I might not do anything."

Shane and Daryl both nodded at Rick.


A Few Days Later...

"Why did you act like that?" Andrea asked as she placed her bag on the couch, following behind Michonne towards the kitchen.

Michonne rolled her eyes folding her arms across her chest.

"I am surprised it's took you so long to come around actually. Since I forget that we all share the same friends and you all like to talk about my relationship behind my back!" she snapped.

"Michonne it isn't like that," Andrea pleaded.

"No? Then tell me what it is like?" she turned around and placed her hands on the countertop.

"It's still hard on him, on everybody, on us. And I know it's not about any of us, but we're his friends just like we are yours. My husband IS his best friend!" Andrea raised her voice slightly.

"It's hard on everyone. You and Rick were so strong, so strong," Michonne knew how difficult it could be that they both shared the same friends. This was hard on her and no doubt even harder on Rick, making it even more uncomfortable.

"He hasn't dated anyone, in two years. He would be heartbroken if he found out that you did."

"It wasn't a date; it was just coffee with a work colleague on my lunch break. It meant nothing and it was hardly a date."

Michonne didn't want to admit that deep down, but if she found out that Rick had dated anyone else, she would be heartbroken. It wasn't fair, it was like he was still waiting for her, but if she was honest a part of her was still waiting on him.

Michonne leaned her back against the counter top.

"It's my fault, Andrea. I get that! Everything is. It's the reason why my children go to their father's. Every. Other. Weekend. That's my fault. The reason why I have no husband and I have gone to bed every night for the past two years, lonely, and crying every single night. That's my fault also. I want to let him in and I don't know how to. I just don't know how." Michonne closed her eyes, tears slipping down her cheeks.

"It's my fault that..."she re-opened her eyes.

"That was not your fault Michonne!" Andrea yelled.

"It was not your fault," she spoke above a whisper, holding onto Michonne's shoulders.

"I am sick of crying. I am Andrea, I am. I am sick of feeling this way and I didn't mean to, push him away," she bit down on her bottom lip.

"Sweetie, I get you're angry about what happened to you, but how long are you going to be alone for? How many nights are you going to sit and drink that bottle of red wine while crying that he's gone? Eating that flipping Chicken curry microwave meal every night." she let out a heavy sigh.

Michonne looked up to Andrea her eyes swelling with tears.

"Yeah babe, I know you do that every single time he picks the children up and you're alone in this house. Chonne, I am your best friend. I care about you but sometimes you do more damage than its worth. You and Rick went through something and you pushed him away instead of going through that together and grieving together. You didn't. You tried to grieve on your own and so did he, but you should have done that together."

Michonne stood there sobbing, as the warm tears falling onto her cheeks and underneath her chin, her bottom lip now trembling even more.

Andrea stood before Michonne wiping the tears with her finger tips.

"You will be ok. I promise. I just think you need to speak to him Michonne. It's been too long for you not to. Don't you think?"

Michonne nodded, agreeing with her friend.

"I am just so scared Andrea." she let out a shaky breath.

"I know babe," Andrea stood before her friend crying with her and wiping her own tears from her eyes.

Andrea pulled Michonne into a hug, rubbing her hands down her back and looking up into her friend's eyes.

"But you and Rick are so much stronger together. Talk to him. It's not too late. He still loves you and you know that. He never stopped loving you, despite everything."

Michonne's eyes were starting to sting now from her tears.

"You're right."

"Me and Shane will pick the kids up from school on Friday and have them all evening and we will drop them back off on Saturday morning. How does that sound?"

"Drea, you don't have to."

"I know but I want to. If this gives you and Rick a chance to get back on track then it will be worth it. Plus, they are all my god children," Andrea smiled rubbing her hand down the side of Michonne's arm.

"Make sure you wear something nice, and don't for the love of evrything, make him chicken curry or have a bottle of red wine," she raised her eyebrows.

Michonne laughed through her tears.

"Ok," she smiled.

"See there's that smile."

Michonne nodded her head as she wrapped her arms around Andrea's neck.

"Thank you," she whispered in her ear before kissing her cheek.

"You're a great friend, and you're going to be the best mommy," Michonne looked down at Andrea's bump rubbing her hand over her stomach.

"So, tell me more about this kiss?" she raised her eyebrows sticking her tongue out.

Michonne laughed again.

"It was good, it was nice."

They both smiled at each other. A few minutes later Michonne saw Andrea out.

Michonne had to compose herself as kids would be back in less than an hour.

She went to splash cold water on her face to look as if she hadn't been crying. Taking a few deep breaths, she knew needed to speak to Rick as he would be back soon from picking their children up from school.


Michonne heard Rick's SUV pull up on her driveway. She checked herself over in the mirror one last time, her eyes no longer bloodshot from crying.

"Can daddy come for a DVD night this week?" Judith said as soon as she opened the front door.

"Oh, hey Judith," Michonne bent down to her daughter, placing a kiss on her lips.

"Hey mommy," Judith received her kiss from her mom.

Michonne stood back up and thought back to what happened last weekend, when Rick stayed for a movie and how things became heated between the two.

"Well, maybe your Daddy has plans this Saturday?"

"No, he doesn't. Daddy's boring!"

Rick laughed "Thanks Judith."

"You're welcome daddy," the little girl smiled.

"Please daddy," she fluttered her eyes at Rick who couldn't resist his princess. She was daddy's girl through and through.

"Ok, as long it's ok with your mom."

Judith and Rick both turned around and looked up to Michonne at the same time. where both sets of matching eyes gazed at her.

"Ok sure, we can order pizza and your brothers will be here too," Family night just like old times Michonne thought.

They hadn't had a chance to discuss the kiss and what happened. Rick still didn't know how to approach the subject. He played it over and over in his mind all week but he still didn't have the courage to speak to her about it.

"Say bye to daddy and then you can go and watch TV. I need to speak to your dad for a minute."

"Bye daddy," Judith wrapped her hands around Rick's neck as he picked her up giving her a tight squeeze and kissing her cheeks causing her to laugh. Michonne smiled watching their interaction. After placing Judith back down on her feet, they both watched Judith's bouncing curls in her pony tail as she sat in front of the TV and out of ear shot.

Michonne turned her attention back to Rick. She could tell that he was nervous about what she was going to ask him.

"I wanted to ask if you would be free to have dinner on Friday. Just me and you," she asked, looking into his eyes.

He just stood there his brain trying to put together what she was asking.

"If you already have plans then its fine."

"Yeah, I would like that. I would like that a lot actually," he smiled rubbing his finger through his brow.

"Ok, good."

"Friday."

"See you Friday, Rick." Michonne let out a small smile, closing her door behind her as Rick walked down the steps back to his car. He turned his head one more time and Michonne waved at him and he waved back.

Heading back to his car Rick got in and turned the key in the ignition. where another smile creeped on his lips.


Friday...

Michonne had been anxious over the last few days and trying to keep herself busy by focusing on work and the kids and their after-school clubs. Today was finally Friday and she was sitting at her office looking at the clock. It was 3.55pm.

Andrea had texted to say that her and Shane had the kids, and to enjoy her night.

Rick would be coming to the house around 7pm so she finished up at work since she planned on stopping by the grocery store for a few items before heading home.

Michonne had put the chicken in the oven with baked peppers. She had also made spicy rice, and a salad with vinegar dressing.

Whilst waiting for the chicken to continue cooking, Michonne took a quick shower. She decided on an orange off the shoulder top with ruffles, a pair of light blue denim shorts, and her cream wedges. She tied her locs up in a colourful head scarf in a ponytail and applied some mascara. She completed her look with a pair of gold hoop earrings.

With just enough time to spare, the door bell rang and she opened the door.

Rick was always on time. It was one of things she liked about him, his punctuality.

"Hi Michonne, you...you look beautiful," Rick said as a shy smile formed on her face.

"Hey, Thank you Rick."

He walked inside the house noticing the good smells from whatever she had cooked.

Rick was wearing a light blue shirt, with some black denim jeans and his beige cowboy boots. His thick brown curls were slicked back, his beard was now even greyer. As he had grown it out even more, over the last few years.

"You look nice," she replied as she shut the door behind him. She didn't know why this felt awkward but she hoped that he was just as nervous as she was.

"Thank you," he caught her gaze as she looked away.

"I thought we could eat outside since the weather is so nice tonight," she said as Rick followed her into the kitchen.

"Yeah, that would be nice," Rick smiled.

"Ok, good."

Michonne served their food and they each brought their plates out into the garden. She had made homemade sangria which she knew Rick loved, well at least she still hoped he did.

Their dinner was filled with talking and drinking, and sharing some laughs. Soft music played in the back ground.

They both looked into the garden, the lights sparkling off their eyes.

"It's always so beautiful out here this time of year," Rick spoke as he placed his glass on the table.

"Yeah it is," she smiled.

They were both sitting comfortably on the cream and black plush garden furniture. She wrapped a blanket around her shoulders as the cool breeze now shifted.

Michonne played with the hem of the blanket, her heart beating in her chest so loudly she thought it was loud that Rick could hear. She shifted in her seat shaking slightly. Michonne felt nervous suddenly and started wiping her sweaty palms down the front of her jean shorts.

Michonne knew it was time to open up, she took a deep breath and closed her eyes shut. Before re-opening them and speaking.


"I...I never got to decorate the nursery Rick, or hold our baby, our baby boy," her hand covered her mouth, tears running down her cheeks smearing her make-up.

He turned to look at Michonne, his heart breaking at the unspoken words she had buried two years ago and refused to talk about with him. The same words now falling from her lips bringing back his own memories. He closed his eyes as tears ran down his face dampness now coated his own cheeks.

"I needed time to heal, but what I didn't realize that you needed time to heal as well. I was being selfish, and I am sorry, I...I pushed you away. I am sorry, that this apology is all I got and...and it may not be enough," the tears cascading down like a river out of her big brown eyes.

The miscarriage was hard on him. But it was harder on Michonne. They lost their son and Michonne blamed herself every single day. There was nothing he could do. He couldn't convince her it wasn't her fault what happened to them. He tried every day but she blamed herself. And nothing seemed to be working. She took it worse than anybody which he was hardly surprised about. A mother's loss is always the worse form and she eventually pushed him away.

"I didn't realise how hard this would be on you. On our family. I am so sorry, I am sorry, I am so SORRY," she started crying hysterically as her chest heaved with every passing moment. Michonne couldn't look Rick in the eyes.

Rick quickly knelt in front of Michonne on the heel of his boots. He placed both his hands on her face wiping away her tears.

"But I did this. I did this to our family, I did this to you. I broke us up. I want to get help. I can't deal with this on my own I thought I could. But I can't," she sobbed.

"Look at me Michonne," she fluttered her eyes open where more tears escaped as she looked into Rick's deep blue eyes full of tears, like her own.

"It's enough. It's ok it's enough." He swallowed his throat felt dry all of a sudden.

"I want you back Rick, I want our life, that we had before. I want it to go back to how it was before ...everything happened," she cried even more. Rick kissed her wrists as he held onto her hands.

"I was stupid to think I could do this on my own without you, by my side. I thought I could, but the truth is. That I can't Rick," she shook her head looking down at their hands interlocking.

"I never gave up on us. I want you to know that even if that's what it seemed like. It's just so hard to explain but I am going to try, for us, for me, for you, Carl, Andre, and Judith. I can't do it without you, and I know it's been two years but please...please forgive me," she looked up into his eyes. Waiting and hoping that Rick wasn't going to reject her. It was the fear of rejection that she didn't think she could handle now.

"Michonne listen to me, there is nothing to forgive," he answered.


Rick and Michonne sat in silence for a couple of minutes with nothing but the music coming from the radio, then their wedding song played as if this was fate. "Etta James- At last,"

Rick stood up and stretched out his hand, Michonne looked down to the palm of his hand.

"Dance with me?" he asked.

"Rick..."

"Come on Michonne... please," he smiled.

She nodded shrugging the blanket off her broad shoulders, letting it fall onto the chair behind her. She placed her delicate hands in Rick's as he spun her around.

Rick smelled Michonne's scent noticing that it was his favourite almond lotion. He closed his eyes for a few minutes placing his lips over her skin on her shoulder.

"You smell so nice. I miss this smell, your smell," he lightly kissed her shoulder.

She let out a small laugh.

Rick had his left hand firmly but gently placed on her hip. Michonne had her arms wrapped around Rick with her right hand locked within his. Rick would often gaze upon her eyes, smiling at his wife. They danced slowly to the elegant music.

"Can I ask you a question?" Michonne asked as they continued to swaying to the music.

"Yeah anything," he rasped out.

"Why did you never take your ring off?"

Rick stopped dancing and he looked at Michonne, his eyes locking with hers. They were both unable to look away.

"Because I couldn't and I never wanted to. Then that would mean I was giving up on you, on us, giving up on our family, and I wasn't willing to do that. I know you needed your space and I gave that to you. I just hated that it was this long, that it took us this long."

Michonne closed her eyes as her eyelids grew heavy from all the tears. In her own pain, she never considered how Rick would be feeling and how much pain he was in. She had spent two years being angry at the wrong person and pushing that person away. In a sad reality, it wasn't anyone's fault what happened to them and what they both went through. Sometimes it's just life and how it works. It took Michonne a while but she realised that something's weren't meant to be. But most importantly it wasn't her fault and it wasn't Rick's.

She placed her left hand on the side of his cheek, her eyebrows scrunched together. Michonne stepped in closer to Rick, he rested his hands on her curvy waist. And she closed the distance between them.

They both looked at each other, staring at each other for what felt like a lifetime.

Until Michonne brought his lips to hers, it was a slow and soft kiss. Her tongue lightly caressed his and Rick wrapped his arms even tighter around her waist.

Michonne pulled back from the kiss and she kissed his top lip gently, and then his bottom lip.

As she pulled out of the embrace, the tips of her fingers clutching onto the ends of his curls then stroking her fingers down the side of his face through his beard.

Their foreheads rested against each other's as the music ended Michonne whispered.

"Will you stay with me tonight?"

Rick nodded his head.


Authors note:

Unfortunately when a tragedy happens to you and the pain which is caused. It's your loved ones first which our one's that our pushed away. You have to almost go away and heal and you have to heal on your own. In your own way and in many ways Michonne did that but she never considered Rick's feelings that they both suffered a loss. To those of you who guessed what their loss was. Ok, no more pain let's move on and look on to the future...hopefully I can put together your broken heart next chapter.

What are your thoughts on this chapter? Would love to know how you felt.