The door burst open, interrupting the almost former Emperor from his; for once, restful sleep. He slowly opened his eyes and diverted them over to the door ;where the Empress was now slamming it shut. It took no stretch of the mind to know exactly what she was on about.
She moved across the room with quite obvious angry distress, and sat down at the chair at his desk. For the most part she just went on mumbling and complaining to herself like she had forgotten this was his room, and that he wasn't there which he quite obviously was.
"...Chunhua." He finally addressed the Empress.
She turned her head quickly towards him, the angry fires practically jumping from her eyes. "He's wandered off again!"
"And who would that be pray tell?"
"Don't play smug with me! How can you not know who!?"
He let out an irritated sigh. He remembered the days when she would just quietly address him, not scream at the top of her lungs. God how he missed those days. Despite the reputation he gained, he was never forceful with the women whose company he had to keep, and he never threatened them or raised his voice at them. But out of tradition for their position, they tended to stay docile around him, as per how things in the court went. So he wasn't used to this bombardment she constantly gave now that he was bed ridden.
"I know very well who you're talking about yes. You don't have to scream and please would you not? I'm a bit sensitive now if you haven't noticed. And you know damn well he is a responsible man under all that, he's just doing what he feels he needs to."
"You can't possibly think I buy that whole act of his about...taking in the people of his future rule?"
Again he sighed. "No of course not. And I knew you wouldn't. But there's something that, despite what we feel, we have to accept."
"And what's that?"
"I'm old and dying, he's never listened to you in the first place...and he's not us. At least...he's not who we are now. There was a time you would have praised this action in him."
"That was long ago."
"Yes, it was." He said as he forced himself up to a sitting position. This small action was getting harder and harder to do with each day, and his arms could barely hold his weight anymore. Chunhua almost got up to help him but stilled herself. "I remember when that boy was born. Of everything you had, of everything I gave you; the gold, the beautiful clothing...he was what you treasured most. The look you gave him that day...was a look I hadn't seen in years and haven't seen since. You and I both changed...and tradition made us make him do the same. But he was stronger than us. He said no."
"...I don't want him to feel that pain...that...feeling of betrayal." Her eyes grew hard as she looked at him. She did as she was told she had to over all these years. Treat him as a superior. Even in friendly banter she had to show a certain level of respect, all the women did. But there was one thing despite all that that still hurt her, and he knew exactly what that was. "...you told me you loved me...only me. And then...you took all those women in anyway..."
"You knew the reasons. There was no way to get around it then, unlike the possibility that exists now. And you had no right to send that girl away regardless. I have never in my life pulled rank on you so to speak...but while I still breathe, who goes and who stays is my decision. That boy...can do what we were too weak to. And neither of us have the right to stand in his way. Not anymore. Yes, he's going to get her, like I'm sure you knew he would. But he wouldn't have to if you hadn't sent her away. You put him in more danger than he initially would have been..."
She got up now, the fire in her eyes growing to what one would see as massive walls of flames. "You're trying to blame this on me!? This is not my fault!"
Instead of shouting back at her, he shifted himself and flung his legs over the side of the bed, making an effort to get up.
"...what are you doing? Don't strain yourself."
He only shrugged her off and, with great effort, pushed himself to his feet. He barely made any ground though as his legs gave out and he had to grab one of the bed banisters to hold himself up. Chunhua rushed over to aid him, regardless of her anger. She took hold of one of his arms and did her best to hold him up.
He, for the first time in ages, flashed a smile at her.
"...there you are. I haven't seen this side of you since we were young..."
"...Shaoqing..."
"Please...help me over to the mirror...I need to show you something..."
"But..."
"Please?"
Hesitantly, she did so, helping him across a rather considerate distance to a corner of the room. He stood with her in front of the mirror, putting one arm up to prop himself on a table next to it.
"Now...look. Look closely in the mirror..."
Confused, she did as he said, taking in both their appearances. He was only a year older than her, but his illness had caused him to age drastically. He hardly looked anything of his former self and even less like a human come to think of it. He was a pained soul trapped in a failing body.
She on the other hand, though middle aged, looked much better off. She hardly even showed any of her age between the various creams and makeup used to cover her features, and the dye used to keep her hair that Xingese raven black. She wore an elegant red silken robe with beautiful features stitched in with bright golden silken threads. Jade earrings dangled from her earlobes and her hair was put up high in an empresses crown. She looked every bit the part of a royal woman.
"...what am I looking for?" She asked at last.
Shaoqing slowly pulled away from her, making his way slowly and agonizingly over to the bed again. She made to follow him but he stilled her with an upraised hand. He grabbed the picture he had showed Ling earlier and made his way back over, stumbling the whole way. By the time he reached her again he was breathing heavily and had to lean hard on the table by the mirror.
"Shaoqing..." She took hold of his arm again, afraid he may collapse to the floor. "Let me get a servant, you have to get back in bed..."
"Not yet...I'm not done yet...look at this." He handed her the picture and let her take it in for a moment. "Now...look back in the mirror..."
"..." Still confused, she did what she was told again, looking over her features again.
"Now...I want you to tell me something...after looking at the picture...and our reflections...tell me who the hell they are...because all I see now are strangers..."
She nearly dropped the picture when she took in what he was saying. There wasn't one bit of them that were those children of long ago. They had both grown cold, cold and callous and for the most part, uncaring. Even she, who had for so long did everything she could to not forget where she came from. Yet here she stood, covered from head to toe in finery and paints to deceive people. There wasn't one part of her that resembled that little girl anymore. Not one part of her that even remembered what it was like to live that life before this. The person in the mirror...both people, were a lie.
"And this...my love...is what we're trying to turn Ling into..."
"...my god..."
"...he's going after the woman he loves...we need to let him...and we need to protect his position till he returns...I want him to have what we denied ourselves..."
She turned to look at him, eyes glossy with UN-shed tears. "I didn't mean...to hurt him..."
"I know. I told him that. At least we...realized it before it was too late. I made up with him before he left...promised to keep his role safe. But I can't do anything else for him. I'll be gone before he returns...but you have time. Show him what it's really like to have a parents love...he'll need that for his own future."
"..." She set the picture down on the table he still leaned on, observing it again for a moment before giving him a careful embrace. "...we still need to catch up...before the gods take you from me as well..."
He smiled again, this time warm and soft, like the smile from his younger days. "That we do, and we shall."
At last she smiled too, allowing the tears to fall. She then escorted him back to his bed, foregoing any servant's help. The rest of this day need only involve them.
The grating sounds of the UN-oiled hinges of the door woke Lan Fan from what slumber she had managed. She looked up to see one of the guards from earlier stepping into the cell, chains in hand. Looks like it was that time again. She was partially enjoying this little game she had started with them. Partially, because she didn't care much for, you know, the whole torture aspect that came with it. But giving them all a day of living hell made up for some of it anyway.
These guards were at least grateful because she tended to stay quiet till she was taken to the 'Breaking Chambers'. They didn't have to stay to babysit her and so weren't subject to her wiles. They also, in turn, hated the men that were handed the job of 'breaking' her. So her little ploys she liked to hit them with amused them greatly and caused them to treat her just a bit more nicely than they had before. So in turn, she afforded them a little less hell, mostly because she saw this as another possible weapon she could use later. It was possible to, over time, gain some sympathy from these two men, they could aid in her escape if need be. So it was best to keep up her light hearted relationship with the two.
So she didn't struggle as he UN-cuffed her from the wall and put her in these new restraints. She was cuffed at each limb, including her neck, to limit movement as much as possible. After all she need only a small bit of freedom to become deadly dangerous.
She was then lead out of the cell and down the hall by the same guard while the other locked up the cell, joining them after. They walked in complete silence for a while before Lan Fan struck up a conversation about the weather. This had been another one of their easy exchanges as it became an inside joke, since she quite obviously could not see what the weather was.
On some occasions they actually would tell her what it was like. At first it had been done as another form of torture for her, but lately it had just become something they just wanted to inform her. Almost like a way of saying the world was still turning, she wasn't dead yet. She came to appreciate that over time.
But now, the only two she allowed herself to associate with, were leaving her in a medium sized room with her tormentors. Both only quickly made their way out of the room, like looking back would cause them to second guess themselves.
So now, she turned to regard the two other men that she was forced to see on a daily basis. One was a younger man, maybe no older than her, dressed in rather ragged clothing. Considering the task they were employed to do, she could see why. His other features for the most part had been hard to see the first few times she came to this room. But since they had added a little more lighting, she could see it better. Was nothing to be really excited about anyway, if that was the proper term for it. He had a rather generic Xingese face, typical black eyes, short cropped hair. Nothing special really.
The other man though, he was a piece of work and rather frightening to her really. He was a larger man...larger in weight. Like one of those guards one would explain was in some torture chamber deep in the bowls of castles in stories of old. She never thought they really existed. But, they apparently did, and they were about as scary as the stories liked to say. This one especially. He was bald...again typical of the stories, he wore the same ragged clothes as his counterpart, only he had the sleeves torn off at the shoulder. He had leather guards on his wrists that showed various signs of wear and tear, along with many suspicious looking gouges...like teeth marks. His face though, was the one thing she always tried to avoid looking at. He had a thin mustache and a beard that tapered to a point at about the start of his massive belly. But that wasn't what she was avoiding, it was that mouth. Nearly every tooth in his mouth was gone and as far as she had seen, and for obvious reasons, he had to drink his food. So various types of foods had to be ground up for him...including what seemed to be a favorite of his. Pig. And he seemed to have every part of the creature ground up which emitted a rather stomach churning smell when it was all ground together. And she knew this because they liked to have their meals in front of her. Another form of torture.
And she also had to remember that these guys would sit down and eat...with their victim bleeding in the room mere feet from them. These two were not human beings by any stretch of the word. In fact, she couldn't come up with any existing word to describe the vileness of these two. And she was trapped with them for god knows how long. They had a tendency to vary how long they 'worked her in' every day. It was their own little game they played to even out the one she played on them every day.
The bigger one moved towards her now, yanking on the restraints at her neck and dragging her over to a flat board. She knew this one all too well because up till her early teen years, it was still used in the bowls of the Palace. The water board. It looked less dangerous than it was and most people would scoff at it's description. But that's only because they never saw it in action. It was a long drawn out torture that made a person go mad, she knew this personally, as she had been forced to watch on a few occasions. She cringed as her restraints were UN-done and she was tossed down and restrained on the table instead. There wasn't much to this torture really and it was easy to go through each movement in her mind before he did them. Sometimes it was far more terrible knowing what was coming than what wasn't. What she wasn't sure of was why they picked this torture first. It was the least hands on. Her best guess was there would be more than her in the room today. And she was proven right moments later as the door flew open and a guard dragged a struggling boy in. He couldn't have been more than ten but he was giving the guard hell.
For a moment she forgot her own hell and the water slowly dripping on her head as she realized she recognized the boy. He was from one of the royal houses, though which one she couldn't recall. She watched as they grabbed him and strapped him onto a table on the other side of the room while the guard made a hasty exit.
The younger of the two turned a wheel, bringing the table to a standing position. The boy still struggled, throwing silent curses at the two. It was only now that Lan Fan took into account the dry blood at his chin and the literal empty threats coming from him. His tongue had been cut out.
"...he's just a child! What the hell did you do to him!?"
"Quiet you! We got no orders that says we can't do that to you too! And we're liable to if you don't shut your trap!" The larger man gruffly yelled. That, of course, didn't deter her.
"What can a child do to you!? You take a child's insults that seriously that you have to tear his tongue out!? Are you that incapable of handling criticism!?"
"I said shut it woman!"
"Make me!"
"Come on! I know you've been looking for a reason to smack me up good! Man your size can't possibly give a damn about threats from your boss! So come on! Shut me up! Just leave the boy alone!"
"I said shut it!" He crossed the room at a rather quick pace considering his size and raised his hand, bringing it down but stopping just before her face.
"...just like I thought...no balls to speak of. Just as much a pawn to your boss as anyone here."
"Oi! Leave her be. We gotta work the kid in. Besides, you know damn well what'll happen if you lay more a hand on her than you're allowed. You'll never see the light of day again. Now get back over here."
The larger man eyed her up a minute longer, hand still held where it stopped just before her cheek, before he turned and made his way back to the younger man.
"And you watch your mouth too boy. I'm your senior, don't be telling me what to do."
"Yeah well, I'm gonna get it too if you fuck things up, so I have a stake in this too."
The larger man only grunted as he walked over to a wheel cart and grabbed a pair of very rusty looking pliers. It was now that Lan Fan was sadly glad the boy couldn't make a sound, but she could see him squirm through the pain. And she could see little flecks of off white as the boys finger nails were torn from his fingers, falling to the floor.
She closed her eyes and swallowed hard, feeling bile rising in her throat. At this rate she'd throw up and choke on her own vomit before the drops of water made her lose her mind.
Wasn't long though before the door opened again and a different guard came in. He said a few stern words to the two men before removing the boys restraints and taking him out. It became pretty obvious that the boy was not supposed to be scheduled for that sort of torture, as the guard made a rather threatening comment as he left. Lan Fan was relieved for the boy, for now anyway. God only knew why he was plucked from the hell he was in. And now, all attention was back on her. The larger man removed her from the water board, to her relief. Her head was starting to feel the effects, both mentally and physically. But this only meant the more painful tortures awaited her. And the grin on their faces...wasn't giving her much hope for her future.
Ling and the others had been traveling most the day and made little attempts to stop for a rest, much to the others discontent. They understood his rush, but still felt like they'd signed on with a madman.
"Seriously Ling, we need to stop." Li finally spoke up. "You're gonna run us all into the ground and what good would that be for your friend?"
Ling turned his head slightly, making an attempt to look over his shoulder, but it was a half assed attempt and he didn't slow up one bit. Not right away anyway. But eventually he did stop, staring up at the sky. They had grown dark and threatening and at any moment he knew they would let loose with torrents of rain. What a time to have this happen, during the monsoon season. He could not afford to be slowed up in any way but there would be no way to travel with the floods that would soon follow.
"...alright. There's a village up ahead. We should stop there and rest a bit. Not going to be able to travel in this rain anyway."
"First logical thing you said this whole time." Qiao bit back.
Ling turned quickly and started to stalk towards her, which managed to actually elicit a look of surprise from her. But Li, again, was able to get between the two.
"We're all tired and a little bit stressed. I know you more so. So we're all liable to hot heads and words that come out before thinking. But we can't afford to let it slow us up right? This rains gonna put us off enough, don't make it worse with squabbling."
"Keep your sister on a leash then." He said it to Li but glared at Qiao the whole time. He knew he wasn't being himself but how could he be? He knew he was on limited time and every second was a second too long. Though he had to agree with Li, he wasn't helping any by fighting with her. So he backed down and turned again, making his way towards the village.
Li turned on his sister though while the others moved on ahead, following Ling. He was having about enough of her as Ling was.
"Look, I know you don't like the guy, you don't have to. But your little issues need to end now. I don't want to lose these guys, they're all gonna pay for what they did. Now this guy, as shady as it may seem, knows more then we do right now and we need him. So just shut up, swallow your pride, and follow his damn lead. Cause I swear to god, if you keep this up, I'll leave you in the next damn village. Got it?"
"..."
"Got it?"
"Yeah, I got it."
"Good. Now get moving, and no more bullshit."
She made no more protests and followed behind quietly.
They all made it to the village just as the rains fell from the sky. There hadn't been much of a lead in, just a flash of lightening, a loud thunder crack, and then the heavens just let loose. So despite being mere feet from the Inn Ling had tracked down, they were already drenched as they entered.
He knew this whole trip he was risking questions he couldn't answer, and right now he was risking it even more as he paid for all their rooms. He knew regardless of what they said, they were suspicious of him, but they needed a roof over their heads in this kind of rain. So he risked it and bought the rooms. He just made sure to be off to his own before any of them had the time to ask him.
But hours later, he heard the dreaded knock anyway. He scowled and made his way over to answer it. Well, at least it was Li, he might get away with things a bit here. He let him in and, after being sure none of his other party followed him, he shut the door. He flopped back down on the bed as Li took a seat in a chair in the corner.
"So...checked up on the weather reports a bit."
"And?"
"Northern mountains are already flooded bad. And the path to where your sisters meeting us is blocked off by a landslide. We have to find a path around...gonna loose a few days..."
"Dammit!" Ling shifted and punched the mattress in frustration. "Why can't I catch a break here!?"
"Calm down Ling. If we're right and the place is that far to the North, they ain't any better off then. They ain't gonna be able to move anyone till this monsoon lets up, and that ain't anytime soon. If anything this turned out to be a good thing. We'll be able to get moving long before them and we have more time to plan. Being patient is our only issue. Can you manage to sit still that long?"
"What do you think?"
Li leaned forward in the chair, looking him dead in the eyes. "Ling, if you go rushing into this, you could get one or both of you killed. Maybe even all of this. I get your feelings, I do. But it ain't gonna help any."
"How do you know how I feel? How can you even begin to know how I feel? I..."
"You love her, I get it. I loved Song too."
"Song? Oh...your...?"
"Yeah, our friend." He shifted, leaning back in the chair again. "It's hard, trying to not think about the things they could be going through. Even harder to watch them if they manage to return. We all watched her deteriorate slowly day by day...but I saw it more. I was with her more. And even though she trusted us...me...there was still nothing I could do. How do you comfort someone when you can't even touch them? Without...without them flinching away like some abused animal? When...words are just...just aren't enough? I watched her waste away. I watched her die...I couldn't get to her in time to stop her...I...so I do get what you're going through. I just hope, you never have to go through what I had to. Some times things that get broken...can't be fixed...and that's the most tragic thing of all. Especially when it's someone else that caused it all..."
"...I'm sorry Li..."
Li only shook his head, standing up. "She's at peace now...nothing more to really do about it...but find the asshole that did it...and make him pay slowly."
"What do I do if...if...it ends up coming to that..."
...everyone acts differently to things like this...you know her best...you do everything and anything you can...don't you dare let her go...don't you dare let her shatter...some people can be brought back from the brink...but not if you don't try..." Li said nothing more as he left the room.
Ling on the other hand had a mind that was racing out of control. He hadn't even taken the time to think of all the other what if's. The other possibilities they might have to face. Even someone as strong as Lan Fan could break, he'd already seen it happen before. It took her forever to get back to herself after Fu passed. What would this do to her?
Growling, he got up and walked over to the window, staring out. He leaned his arm on the frame and settled his head on it, watching as the rain ran down the window. Watched as it pooled outside, like the entirety of the sky was doing what he couldn't allow himself to. He felt that if he broke now he would lose his center, his focus, and he couldn't afford that. Or maybe he was just being stupid thinking that, and most likely he was. But he didn't want to risk anything right now. So, all he could do now, is hope the rain would stop soon and long enough to get to Mei.
