I'm surprised I've made it this far without writing some good old angst! Not sure if tomorrow ("There Was No Warning") will be angsty, cutsey, or funny, so if you want to influence my decision, just review with your vote and I'll do whatever you guys say. (;
Title: The Fear
Summary: Autophobia (the fear of being alone or of oneself)
Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto
Prompt: Phobia (Day Three)
Rating: T
Warnings: none
Sakura had a secret, one she had to keep entirely for herself because if she ever told someone, they probably wouldn't take her seriously.
They wouldn't be able to understand how severe it had gotten.
At the moment, Sakura was sitting by herself in her large apartment, tears streaming down her face as she sat on the bed in fetal position. She knew how to fix this, but she didn't really have many options. It was too late to head to a bar, and all of her friends were most likely asleep. So she stood herself up slowly, making her way towards the kitchen that she rarely used.
She pulled out a bottle of clear liquid, which thanks to Tsunade, she had an endless supply of. Her mentor never questioned how quickly she went through her supply, since she probably assumed Sakura shared it with the many friends she always surrounded herself with.
Pouring a generous amount into a glass, she took a swig, wincing at the taste. But the warming effect felt like a familiar hug and it soothed her. It helped take her mind off of how alone she was, and how no one seemed to care enough to keep her company when she needed it most.
As she finished the liquid in a few more swift gulps, she immediately felt better than before. She headed back to bed to change into her nightclothes, stumbling a bit as the alcohol took into effect. But nevertheless, it helped her relax, and she felt more at ease when she went under the covers, ignoring the frantic thoughts running through her mind over the recent events in her life.
Naruto had left for training in Suna, Ino was on vacation in tea country with the rest of her team, Kiba was on a mission, and Hinata was entirely wrapped up with clan meetings and politics.
She had never felt more alone.
The rest of the month would be pure torture, and she still had three more weeks to go.
The next day, Sakura was all smiles at the hospital. She had spent a few hours in the morning punching holes into the trees on one of the training fields, and her pent-up emotions had dissipated as she felt the blood ooze from her knuckles.
(Though it only took a few seconds to heal her skin, she wished there was a medical jutsu for healing pain on the inside as well)
But she didn't have time to complain since there were patients to tend to and paperwork to fill out. She could feel her stomach growl in protest at her third day in a row of skipping lunch, but she ignored it.
Not like I have anyone to go eat with anyways…she thought bitterly.
The rest of the day went by far too quickly for her liking, since more free time meant more time sitting in her apartment pretending she didn't feel ignored.
Sakura stopped by the market on her way back, picking out a few vegetables that she probably wouldn't end up eating anyways. Her diet for the past few days had been mostly black coffee and alcohol since her sense of hunger seemed to go away along with her friends.
If they were your real friends, they wouldn't leave you alone.
That night found Sakura crying on her bed once more. She kept the window open, feeling the cold air blow against her exposed skin. Wearing only a bra and panties, the wind felt almost like a gentle caress.
The familiar bottle of alcohol was in her hand, almost empty.
I'm always the one left behind. Sakura cried to herself, hot tears pooling from her half-lidded eyes.
Since there was no one around, she allowed herself to sob aloud, the choked noise sounding out-of-place during such a peaceful Konoha night.
I shouldn't even be feeling sorry for myself. There are people in the world dying in battle, and here I am crying over just being all by myself.
Seeing that there wasn't really much else to ponder (and the bottle was almost gone anyways), Sakura curled up under her covers, only having the energy to pull the sheets up to cover her lower half.
Sasuke walked briskly to Sakura's apartment, cursing himself for forgetting something trivial. He was required to have the head doctor's signature on his paperwork to begin missions again, and since Tsuande was gone for who-knows-how-long, he had to find his ex-teammate in the middle of the night.
She probably wouldn't even be awake, but he didn't think she'd be angry if he woke her up. After all, he couldn't recall the last time he asked a favor of her.
Well actually…he couldn't recall the last time he had even spoken to the pink-haired girl.
Even though it had been a few years since he had returned to the village, Sakura's interactions with him were very few, giving him the impression that she just wanted to avoid him for as long as possible. And for now, he let her, since he knew she'd grow out of it eventually.
After all, she had pledged her devotion to him before, so there was no reason for him to think otherwise.
When he got to her door, there was no response to the first few knocks, so he tried again.
Nothing.
With a sigh, Sasuke moved onto plan B.
Lucky for him, Sakura's window was already open.
Tch. Even if she's an S-level shinobi, she should at least take basic safety precautions.
He expected her to wake up immediately as soon as his chakra presence was near, but to his surprise, she didn't stir one bit in her sleep.
Curious, Sasuke went over to examine the reason.
The first thing he noticed made him feel a little uncomfortable, since he hadn't really seen Sakura with just a bra on before. But with her position, it didn't seem sexual at all. Instead, she looked vulnerable…almost breakable.
The second thing that stood out was the spilled bottle on the bottom of her bed, though there didn't look to be much liquid left in the first place. It smelled quite obviously of alcohol, which confirmed why she didn't wake up when he entered.
However, something within Sasuke decided that he needed to see for himself what she looked like mid-slumber, so he walked up to the side of the bed, dark eyes never leaving her shivering form.
Her skin was just as pale and flawless as it had been when they were younger, a few strands of pink hair hanging over her face. And as he looked more intensely, he could see the wetness on her cheeks, meaning that she had only fallen asleep recently.
So what was Sakura doing, crying and drinking at 3am?
Hearing a breathy whimper, Sasuke looked her over once more as she shifted in her sleep.
Hopefully her dreams are better than whatever was keeping her up before…he thought, feeling a distinct pang of something in his chest.
Realizing there was no way he would be able to wake her up without feeling a massive amount of guilt, he just left the unsigned form on her nightstand so that she'd see it in the morning.
As he was about to leave, he took another glance back.
She looked so cold….
Sasuke pulled the covers up so that they were up to her chin, shielding her from the cool night air. Then, he did something definitely out-of-character.
He lightly pressed his lips against her smooth cheek, pausing for a few seconds as he inhaled the sweet scent coming off of her hair.
Goodnight, Sakura.
I was listening to the song "My Body is a Cage" on repeat for almost the entire time I was reading this and it kinda shows. (but it's an amazing song omg)
